and i felt most at home with billie holliday. i'd lived longest with her. and i studied her and had written about her. i think what i wanted to do was i wanted to, one, choose a woman who was engaged in the production of music who wasn't a singer. because we know the singers, we know some of the singers, and that's usually our way of, our way of thinking about women in jazz. and i wanted to try something else like what does it mean to think of yourself as a composer and an arranger at this period in such a male-dominated way. and i also, you know, she -- all three of these women, i think, their sense of themselves was just so incredible to me. and especially mary lou williams. i mean, there were so few examples for her of what it was she was trying to become, and most of those examples were male. and yet she pursued it, she had absolute confidence in her talent and ability and importance. and so i think that i just, i sort of learned to welcome the opportunity to try and learn how to write about her. and how to write about the music. and then it just was a