bush would have us over for breakas, tom and i would go regularly after 9/11. but on other occasions we have bipartisan small dinners up in the family quarters, bipartisan, with our spouses. and it helped build a relationship. >> rose: explain that to me because i talked to somebody who had served as deputy secretary of state who was a very tough guy. and he said to me, the most important thing i learned here is that relationships matter. relationships on the international scene. but relationships matter. >> absolutely. >> rose: because it develops trust. and it peoples prepared to give you the benefit of doubt. >> it's so basic. and so common sense kal. why can't we act on that. >> it leads to communication, communication ultimately leads to compromise, compromise rongest national securitye and concern as i said that show unless we can fix washington, we are vulnerable in so many ways in terms of the future of the country, in terms of how we commit to the future, how we commit to education, budget policy. >> budget policy, defense policies, foreign relations p