there was already a carol wendelson, so i had to register as "john carol wendelson." - when were youmorning. it's okay, though, if you missed it, because i'll be on again tomorrow. - but...me, famous anchor. you, local fool. [blubbers] - carol, we missed you. can you start my zipper? i can finish it, but i need you to start it. - carol, can you finish my zipper? i can start it, but i can't-- - why don't you guys just help each other? both: we like how carol does it. - you know, we have a new pa on the show. carol, come on out here. - hi, carol. this is carol. aren't you cute? now, we sent carol to see the new "star wars." carol, what'd you think of the movie? - well, i thought it was very scary. - oh, scary? okay, what part? - well, when the words jumped out at me at the beginning. i can't read that fast. that's why i always miss my exit on the highway. [laughter] - all right, did you like the movie? - it was okay, i guess. but there was so much fighting, and i didn't like that kylie renner. anyway, overall, i give it a five stars up. - [laughs] well, carol, since you like "star wars

you are the great carol wendelson... and you've got this. - good job.you buy a gift certificate at red lobster during an endless shrimp promotion, endless shrimp should apply whenever you use the gift certificate. - we're gonna need a new topic. - that's the last one. - this... ends... now. or else my lawyers do the legal equivalent of turning your butts inside-out. - for my next topic, uh, my next topic is, uh... - no, no. we don't have anything. - oh, uh... i have, uh, no more t-topics. i've said everything i could possibly think of, and i just wish i could think of more, because i don't want to retire and leave these people, people who've done everything that they could to help me tonight and every night. people like justin, who sits on my feet when i'm cold, and greg, who always makes me look smart, even though i've been diagnosed as a medical idiot, and portia, who's not the reason i got into the news but she's certainly the reason i stayed in. i love them all. - well, too bad. because i just bought your local police force, and they're on their way

my name is carol wendelson. i'm an intern at "the breakdown," but i'm looking to take my next step.ere any openings at "morning wined up"? - ohh... - i may be a little long in the tooth to be chasing my dreams, but kelly, i know from your autobiography that you didn't get your start in television until you were 40! - yes! - and mary-kelly, i know fryour autobiography that you had sex with wee man. - i love that you read my book! i mean, that is the first line, but i trust you finished it? - mm-hmm. - you are so cute! - oh... - i bet we could find you a job as a pa or something. - well, why not? - really? thank you so much! i'll be in touch... as soon as i tell my boss greg about your offer. [keyboard keys clacking] - it's getting pretty late. should we order dinner? uh, not like dinner like wine and oysters. i meant like some brown, gross crap or something? - no, no, i love gross food. that's why they call me gross-out greg. - [laughs] you know about that? - wait--what? they actually call me that? you know what? let's just keep working. - [quietly] oh, my god. - katie, it's like a m