i tell you t is time to build a bridge in the chunnel. for one part of the show really twisted my tea bags. a song and dance number celebrating the nhs, britain's socialist national health service. look at that. that kid's not even six. he's faking it to get free health care. get ready for obamacare, folks. instead of taking you to a hospital, they throw you on a rolling disco bed and cram you a thousand at a time into a stadium while spectatorser. >> when your colonoscopy gets thrown up on the cam. it's coming. don't kid yourself. (cheers and applause) >> stephen: that's what's coming. kiss, i can! (laughter) but you know what, that's over. the games are on and america is doing great. right now the united states and china are tied in total medals. naturally the u.s. trails in gold because every time we win one, we hand it over on the podium to pay off our national debt. (laughter) but of course, folks, all of this is just filler. while we wait for the olympic event i declared the sport of the summer, dressage. the graceful, interplay of