tonight -- kevin bacon, mike epps, and music from ben harper, with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, thank you. hello, everybody. welcome. hi, i'm jimmy. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. welcome back to those who were with us in prime time earlier tonight, for game five of the nba finals. you know, on friday night, we conducted an experiment. i don't know -- it was a dumb

cleto would drive the car.e driving around the block -- sorry if i'm just now telling you this. [ laughter ] we'd spend 45 minutes trying to get it exactly -- we marked with chalk the parking spot. it was never even close to worth it. >> are you a good driver? >> jimmy: yeah, i'm all right. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. no, i love it. i'm not going to tell you how many cars i have because that would probably be environmentally irresponsible. >> jimmy: really? >> probably. >> jimmy: you're not driving them all at once, are you? >> not all at once. >> jimmy: so that's okay. do you have like a jay leno-style warehouse full of cars? >> i wish. i wish i could do that. but no, i don't have that. >> jimmy: you don't, wow. this is -- i would not have expected this of you. >> i love cars. >> jimmy: yeah. >> there's so many i still want. >> jimmy: which are at the top of your list? >> well, right now i want a 1976 corvette, t-to i wthanint ong.e of those. >> jimmy: wow. >> and i would love to have a 1969 el dorado. gold. total go

tonight -- kevin bacon, mike epps, and music from ben harper, with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, thank you. hello, everybody. welcome. hi, i'm jimmy. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. welcome back to those who were with us in prime time earlier tonight, for game five of the nba finals. you know, on friday night, we conducted an experiment. i don't know -- it was a dumb experiment. j.j. reddick, a former player who now works for espn, says steph curry of the golden state warriors reads tweets during halftime. he looks to see what people are writing about him, and uses it as motivation in the second half. so, friday night, we were on before game four and i encouraged those watching to tweet something saying they saw steph swallow a fly during the game. because i thought it would be funny if he sat down at halftime, he was like, whoa, i ate a what? i guess a lot of other people thought it would be funny, too, because a lot of people did do that. all these tweets. saying things like -- "y'all saw that or

scott, and music from meghan trainor featuring teddy swims, with cleto and the cletones.an hayes! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ]

with cleto and the cletones. and now, chelsea handler!hi! wow! thank you! thank you, thank you, thank you! [ cheers and applause ] thank you so much. thank you. welcome to "jimmy kimmel live." i am your guest host, chels

tonight, queen latifah, danny ramirez, and music from pusha t, with cleto and the cletones.eers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: well, thank you. welcome. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. [ cheers and applause ]pthank y big night of basketball in america. thank you. game one -- earlier tonight, game one of the nba finals between the boston celtics and

even though his face is so dumb. >> cleto: what's this movie about?>> yeah. "bullet train." it's a fun one. i'm telling you. it is so -- first of all, i mean, all jokes aside, obviously brad pitt's the coolest and this movie is so cool. i get to play an assassin in an action movie led by brad pitt. it's like that's -- it's like hollywood. like everything that encompasses the word hollywood is what you imagine that to be. and it was so much fun to make. >> chelsea: yeah, i bet it was. i just still can't believe you're 22 years old and you're getting married. >> i mean, by the time i get married i'll be 23, maybe a little older. >> chelsea: yeah. stretch out that engagement as long as you can. you know what i mean? i don't want to seem like maternal because i'm not. yeah, you want to stretch out that engagement. 22 is so young. >> everyone keeps asking me like when's the wedding, when's the wedding? likar literally we called my grandmother after we got engaged. i'm like grandma, we're engaged. and she's like, where's the wedding? and i was like, grandma

tonight -- kevin bacon, mike epps, and music from ben harper, with cleto and the cletones.cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, thank you. hello, everybody. welcome. hi, i'm jimmy. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. welcome back to those who were with us in prime time earlier tonight, for game five of the nba finals. you know, on friday night, we conducted an experiment.

with cleto and the cletones. and now, chelsea handler!a: hi, guys! hi, guillermo! hi! thank you, thank you! hi, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] love it! hi, hi, hi, hi! thank you so much.

with cleto & the cletones. presented by heineken. and now, jimmy kimmel!mmy: hello and welcome to our nba game night special. we are coming to you in primetime for game 3 of the nba finals between the golden state warriors and the boston celtics. the celtics won game one, but golden state came roaring back to even it up. it was beyond a revenge game. the warriors punished boston like john wick after they killed his dog. much of the credit goes to warriors head coach steve kerr, and his brilliant strategy of getting the ball to steph curry and having him shoot without looking from wherever he happens to be on the court. jordan poole went crazy too, he is now the youngest player in finals history to hit five three pointers, including this ridiculous buzzer beater at the endof the third quarter. >> golden state has a will the lot of time. poole with the ball. launches. >> jimmy: he shot that from alcatraz. that was like one of those halftime contests. if you make it, you go home with a toyota rv. much of it was courtesy of draymond green. >> he put his legs o

with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thanks.very nice. hello, my fellow americans. i'm jimmy, the i'm the host of this, the show. thank you for watching. thank you for joining us from hollywood where our special guest tonight is the president of the united states, joe biden. [ cheers and applause ]

with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: very nice.eers and applause ] i appreciate it. after a long and beautiful weekend here in sunny southern california, guillermo i

wth cleto and the cletones. presented by heineken. and now, jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: hi everybody. welcome to monday night basketball on nbc. we are coming to you in prime time after the nba finals. i'm jimmy kimmel. this is that magical time of year where i'm on tv when people are awake. so, it's refreshing for all of us here. we have a new and all-star-studded nba edition of "mean tweets" on the way, and samuel l. jackson is with us too. samuel l. jackson. do you know what the "l" stands for? turns out, lisa. true. so for all you kids watching with your folks, uncle samuel's here to teach you some fun new words! it's game five between the warriors and the celtics, and the fans in boston are very fired up. >> it's a big day for the celtics. sure fun to be out in full force and see if we can bring this one home. >> that was bill belichick, coach of the cross-town new england patriots shortly after he had his morning nyquil. boston has been in the finals a lot. they are tied with the lakers for most titles of all time, but two of the guys on this year's team, jaylen brown and jayson

tonight, rupaul, van lathan jr., and music from becky g., with cleto and the cletones.rs and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: that's very nice. welcome, thanks. i'm embarrassed, really, thanks. hi, i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. i thank you for watching at home and for joining us here in our studio. i have to tell you, we're a man down tonight. guillermo is not here for the second night in a row, and he might not be back for a while. he's at home right now with a

plus, "dodge basketball," with cleto and the cletones presented by heineken. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hello, and thank you for joining me on a friday night of basketball in the u.s. of a. we are in primetime for game four of the nba finals. the winner of game four goes on to play the loser of game five, whereas the team that lost game four has to play the game five winner, and vice versa -- until one of the teams wins four games and the other team loses four games. and at that point the series concludes. you following this, guillermo? >> guillermo: yeah, yeah, sure. of course. >> jimmy: after opening the series at chase center in san francisco, the games have moved to a stadium named after a different bank. td garden, which used to be the boston garden. before tony danza came in and bought it. [ laughter ] this is an important game for both teams. you know, the winner of game four goes on to play the loser of -- oh, did i go through this already? [ laughter ] >> guillermo: yeah. you already said it. >> jimmy: right. 12 seconds ago. i'm sorry. you know

with cleto and the cletones. and now, sean hayes!ause ] ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> sean: whoo, whoo, whoo! ♪ [ cheers and applause ]

with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thanks.i, i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thanks for watching. thanks for making your friday night our friday night, i appreciate it. well, i don't know if you watched the game last

with cleto and the cletones. presented by heineken. and now jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: hello basketball lovers. lovers in general. i'm jimmy kimmel. it is sunday and welcome to "nba game night." tonight, game two of the nba finals from san francisco. remember when the finals were in a bubble and the players lived at disney world? that was real, right? i didn't thathallucinate that? or did i dream that? either way, here we are. the celtics versus golden state. as is the tradition, the mayors of the cities, have a fun bet going. if the warriors win, boston will send them some of their famous clam chowder. and if the celtics win, san francisco will also send clam chowder. it's a very clammy, chowder-y series this year. with both teams boasting some of the most colorful fans in the the td pro shop believe the celtics will win. >> 100%. if we can beat miami like whoa did, we beat brooklyn, we shot them out, we're red hot. we're ready to go. >> jimmy: well, there's no one redder or hotter than frank. this is interesting. nba teams, like any business i guess get yelp

with cleto and the cletones. presented by heineken. and now jimmy kimmel!lo basketball lovers. lovers in general. i'm jimmy kimmel. it is sunday and welcome to "nba game night." tonight, game two of the nba finals from san francisco. remember when the finals were in a bubble and the players lived at disney world? that was real, right? i didn't thathallucinate that? or did i dream that? either way, here we are. the celtics versus golden state. as is the tradition, the mayors of the citie h

with cleto and the cletones! and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you.. [ cheers and applause ] that's very nice. thank you. hi. i'm jimmy. i am the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for traveling from near and far to visit us here in hollywood, where the summit of the americas is under way. i feel likepeople don't know about it, but this is a major international meetup. leaders from north, south, and central amer

reaction might be that's not a great 3 decision -- "jmel a ls adam sandler, and dodge-basketball with cleto and the cletones presented by hine ten. and now, jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: hello and welcome to our special nba finals game night. we are coming to you in primetime for game one of the nba finals between boston and golden state. the warriors versus the celtics. it's basically "braveheart" with a basketball. [ laughter ] the last time these teams met in the finals was 1964 when you could get a loaf of bread for 30 cents, a movie ticket cost $1.25, and you could buy a two story house in ohio for a bag full of tin cans. back in 1964. [ laughter ] it's some story for golden state. last year, they didn't make the playoffs. the year before that, they had the worst record in the nba. and now, they are back in the finals for the sixth time in eight years. and the san fran fans are fired up. >> nba finals 2022. we're going all the way. >> four more. four more. >> coming hard in the finals. with the celtics, the heat. bring it on, baby. ready for all of them now! >> jimmy: oh, wow. jon turturro r

with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel!ers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: oh, thank you. that's very nice. oh, hey. hi, i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming to see us here in hollywood. it's friday, and we all have something in common tonight. none of us had anything better to do than this. [ cheers ]

tonight -- jenny slate cooper raiff and music from weezer with cleto and the cletones and now, sean hayesplause ] ♪ >> welcome to jimmy kimmel live! i'm your gue h

with cleto and the cletones! and now, chelsea handler! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >>> thank you!, you it! [ cheers and applause ] thank you. sit down! welcome to "jimmy kimmel live,"

with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome.e. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching, thank you for coming. and a special welcome to those of you who watched us earlier tonight in prime time for game six of the nba finals. boy, a lot of exciting

with cleto and the cletones. and now -- jimmy kimmel! ♪ >> jimmy: hi, welcome. i'm jimmy. well, thank you. very nice. hi, everyone. i'm jimmy. i am the host of the show. thanks for watching. thank you for coming. [ cheers and applause ] we are back to work after a long and beautiful weekend here in sunny southern california. guillermo is back from covid quarantine. [ cheers and applause ]

tonight, tessa thompson, patrick schwarzenegger, and music from kevin morby, with cleto and the cletonesw, sean hayes! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> sean: whoo! [ cheers and applause ] >> sean: thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. thank you very much. thank you.

scott, and music from meghan trainor featuring teddy swims, with cleto and the cletones. and now, sean hayes! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. very nice of you. thank you. please. as oprah would say, take a seat. welcome to "jimmy kimmel live." i'm your guest host, sean hayes. jimmy is on vacation doing what he does best, falling asleep on the toilet for days at a time. [ laughter ] this is my final night guest hosting. i know, i'll miss me, too. but i thought maybe the best way to express my feelings about my lovely week here at the show would be through song. oh, i'm not going to sing, but it would be the best way. we've had a good run and the youtube comments have been effusive. "have no idea who sean hayes is." "who the hell is sean hayes?" "who he?" he, me. and just to clear things up, i am sean hayes, award-winning actor, producer, lover. [ cheers and applause ] i know it can be confusing because there are a lot of sean hayeses out there. for instance, some of you may have been expecting to see this sean hayes, who's a canadian strongm

tonight, tessa thompson, patrick schwarzenegger, and music from kevin morby, with cleto and the cletones. and now, sean hayes! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> sean: whoo! [ cheers and applause ] >> sean: thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. thank you very much. thank you. oh, you guys are so nice. welcome to "jimmy kimmel live." i am your guest host, sean hayes. [ cheers and applause ] before we get started, jimmy texted me right before the show. for real. he wanted me to tell you he loves you, he misses you and he can't wait until he's back with you after he's done with his vacation. [ laughter ] so -- yeah. just kidding, i haven't heard from him in weeks. [ laughter ] he's probably on a beach somewhere with a spanish-to-english dictionary looking up how to say "two more marijuanas, please." [ laughter ] [ applause ] true. one for me. we are coming to you from not-so-sunny california, where for once, we actually had weather to complain about. there was massive thunder and lightning for hours last night. thunderstorms don't happen a lot in l.a. usually if you hear a loud noise from t

with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome. that's very nice. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching, thank you for coming. and a special welcome to those of you who watched us earlier tonight in prime time for game six of the nba finals. boy, a lot of exciting match-ups. boston versus golden state, the lightning versus the avalanche, everyone who worked for donald trump versus donald trump. another unbelievable day in washington today. house select committee presented episode three, revenge of the 6th today. this story gets craze yers with each -- it really should be called "that did what-ergate?" trump knew what he was trying to do was illegal and you're not going to believe this, he did it anyway. this was the third of what will be six hearings. it's hard to believe this isn't scripted. >> the select committee will be in order. ♪ >> president trump rejected the advice of his campaign experts. >> the stuff that his people were shoveling out to the public was [ bleep ]. >> are you out of your mind. >> and

tonight -- jenny slate cooper raiff and music from weezer with cleto and the cletones and now, sean hayes! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> welcome to jimmy kimmel live! i'm your guest host for the week, sean hayes. [ cheers and applause ] thank you very much. thank you. jimmy is busy training for the sochi olympics, i didn't have the heart to tell him they were in 2014. at this point, jimmy is like the mcrib. you can't get him year round, and he's always covered in barbeque sauce. [ laughter ] this is my third year guest hosting the show. [ cheers and applause ] and people ask me why i keep doing this every summer. i don't do it for the money, i don't do it for the accolades -- i do it for the applause. [ cheers and applause ] oh my gosh, thank you! that was so unprovoked! it's great to be back on abc, you know, i spent more than a decade at nbc- on a little show, you probably never saw it -- "will and grace?" [ cheers and applause ] 75 years ago. [ laughter ] "will and grace" was ahead of its time we were the first sitcom to point out that rich white ladies named karen were problematic. [ l

with cleto and the cletones. and now, chelsea handler! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> chelsea: hi, guys! hi, guillermo! hi! thank you, thank you! hi, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] love it! hi, hi, hi, hi! thank you so much. thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. welcome to "jimmy kimmel live." i am your guest host chelsea hammer. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy is taking the summer off because men are weak. [ laughter ] this is my third night hosting, and it has been a lot of fun. [ cheers ] on monday we talked about roe v. wade. last night i covered the january 6th hearings and jeffrey epstein. what should we do tonight? [ laughter ] guillermo, who do you like better, israel or palestine? >> guillermo: i like mexico. [ cheers ] >> chelsea: i also like mexico. >> guillermo: yeah, it's the best. >> chelsea: you know, a lot of the comments online have mentioned you and i have really good chemistry, do you agree? >> guillermo: yike cereal and milk. [ laughter ] yes, good team. >> chelsea: thank you. go team, go team! >> guillermo: yeah

with cleto and the cletones. and now, sean hayes! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> sean: whoo, whoo, whoo! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> sean: thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. oh my god. i haven't worked out that much in so long. [ laughter ] welcome to "jimmy kimmel live." i'm your guest host, sean hayes. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for joining us on the first day of summer, which is wild. this is the day when both the sun and jimmy kimmel are said to be at their highest. [ laughter ] today is also known as the summer solstice, which is the longest day of the year, which is funny. because i thought the longest day of the year was the time i saw side of convenient seagal do shakespeare in the park. [ laughter ] and it was hot. out of all the days in the year, this is the one where we get the most sunlight. if you were still sad today, i hate to break to it you but your seasonal depression is just regular depression. [ laughter ] there's no official definition for when summer begins or it ends, just like a white

with cleto and the cletones. and now, chelsea handler! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> chelsea: hi, everybody! hi, guillermo! hi! wow! thank you! thank you, thank you, thank you! [ cheers and applause ] thank you so much. thank you. welcome to "jimmy kimmel live." i am your guest host, chelsea handler. [ cheers and applause ] hosting this show has taught me that a woman can do anything a man can do. when he's on vacation and doesn't feel like doing it. [ laughter ] we have a lot to get to. starting with the explosive hearing in washington. it turns out donald trump was even more of a [ bleep ] bag than we originally thought. [ laughter ] we heard some truly insane testimony from cassidy hutchinson, a top aide to trump's chief of staff, mark meadows. cassidy paint a very unflattering portrait of trump's behavior on january actionth, drug the little bitch-fit he threw when the secret service wouldn't let him go to the capitol during the riot. >> he said something to the effect of, "i'm the effing president, take me up to the capitol now." to w

with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thanks.h, that's very nice. hello, my fellow americans. i'm jimmy, the i'm the host of this, the show. thank you for watching. thank you for joining us from hollywood where our special guest tonight is the president of the united states, joe biden. [ cheers and applause ] amtrak just putted into the station. he's here tonight to figure out which type of handbasket our country will be going to hell in. [ laughter ] as a precautionary measure, tonight we rounded up everyone in our audience called "brandon." [ laughter ] all the brandons have been removed from the premises and relocated to the dave & buster's across the street, where they're being held in a claw machine until the president is back on air force one. [ applause ] it's kind of exciting to have the president visit you at work. but not everyone's thrilled about his appearance here tonight. the folks at fox news and the wannabe fox news juniors are very upset the president is doing an interview with of all people me while he's in town

tonight, queen latifah, danny ramirez, and music from pusha t, with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: well, thank you. welcome. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. [ cheers and applause ]pthank y big night of basketball in america. thank you. game one -- earlier tonight, game one of the nba finals between the boston celtics and the golden state warriors up in san francisco. the game aired on abc earlier tonight, which means right now, this show is on mute in hundreds of buffalo wild wings across the country. [ laughter ] they see us, but nobody's listening. [ laughter ] obviously, fans in both the bay area and beantown are excited. two great franchises playing. but it's not just the fans who are excited. the celtics got a nice little shout-out from the coach of the cross-town new england patriots, bill belichick, who's very fired up. >> congratulations to the team, the staff, the organization. great accomplishment. look forward to seeing that play out. >> jimmy: my god, calm down, man, you're going to blow a vein out of your

with cleto and the cletones! and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you.hank you. [ cheers and applause ] that's very nice. thank you. hi. i'm jimmy. i am the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for traveling from near and far to visit us here in hollywood, where the summit of the americas is under way. i feel likepeople don't know about it, but this is a major international meetup. leaders from north, south, and central america are gathered here in los angeles to compare mustaches. i don't know what -- were you invited to this, guillermo? >> guillermo: yeah. but i couldn't go. i have to be here for you. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: is that right? >> guillermo: yeah. >> jimmy: you were invited to this meeting of all the leaders from all the countries in our region and you decided to be here to protect me and to potentially save my life if it's necessary. >> guillermo: that's right, jimmy, you're first. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. gracias. by the way, the president of mexico is not coming. he decided to skip it in solidarity with the

with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: very nice.hanks for watching. [ cheers and applause ] i appreciate it. after a long and beautiful weekend here in sunny southern california, guillermo is back from covid quarantine. [ cheers and applause ] >> i love you, jimmy. i miss you. i miss you so much. >> jimmy: i miss squishing toys. are you feeling okay, guillermo? >> yes, jimmy. >> jimmy: you tested negative? you were out last week. be honest, how many times did you watch the show last >> [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no times? why was that, why do you think? >> i don't know. i go to bed early. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what are you going to do, you know? i'm glad you're here. i'm glad everyone is here. you know, thousands of flights were canceled over the week because of covid and issues. airlines said most passengers who got delayed were booked on later flights which is fine. here's where this is not fair. when we try to change a flight, even when we have covid, there's a fee for making a change, there's a penalty. you have to pay l

with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: oh, thank you. that's very nice. oh, hey. hi, i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming to see us here in hollywood. it's friday, and we all have something in common tonight. none of us had anything better to do than this. [ cheers ] i want to welcome those who joined us in primetime for game four of the nba finals in boston where fans have taken a particular dislike to warriors power forward draymond green. everybody doesn't love draymond in boston. [ laughter ] he has been greeted with chants of f-u each time he's played there, which you have to take with a grain of salt, f-u is like their aloha in boston. [ laughter ] that's how they greet everyone. that's what ben affleck's grandma says when he goes home to visit. [ laughter ] green and his warrior teammates were not happy with all the four-letter words boston fans have been throwing at draymond. a few of them called it classy, and i did detect a hint of s

with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thanks.h, that's very nice. hi, i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thanks for watching. thanks for making your friday night our friday night, i appreciate it. well, i don't know if you watched the game last night, but the golden state warriors are the nba champions. they closed out their series against the celtics to win their fourth nba title in only eight years. this was the scene in the mission district of san francisco where fans finally got to show off the expensive hydraulics they had installed in their cars just for -- the nice thing about these cars, had the warriors lost, they can flip over themselves. [ laughter ] it was an emotional night for fans in the bay area and for the players too. >> i mean, there's some dog days, a lot of tears shed on the bench. steph talking to me, even draymond, just -- those guys, andre -- i'm just thankful to be here, man, this is crazy, i can't believe it. i knew it was a possibility. to see it in realtime? holy cannoli, this is crazy. >> jimmy: my

with cleto and the cletones. and now -- jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, welcome. i'm jimmy. well, thank you. very nice. hi, everyone. i'm jimmy. i am the host of the show. thanks for watching. thank you for coming. [ cheers and applause ] we are back to work after a long and beautiful weekend here in sunny southern california. guillermo is back from covid quarantine. [ cheers and applause ] >> guillermo: yeah! i love you, jimmy. i missed you. >> jimmy: don't ever leave me again, you little -- >> guillermo: i missed you so much. >> jimmy: like one of those squishy toys. [ laughter ] feeling good? >> guillermo: feeling great, jimmy. >> jimmy: tested negative. you were out the whole week last week. be honest. how many times did you watch the show last week? >> guillermo: [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no? >> guillermo: no. >> jimmy: no times? why was that? why do you think? >> guillermo: i don't know. i go to bed early. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, boy. well, what are you going to do, you know? i'm glad you're here. i