stephen colbert." this rank fear mongering is colbert's key fundraising technique.r show last night, i suddenly felt duped by colbert because we had shown the first ad that colbert said his super pac is putting on television in iowa. while making fun of rick perry. and unconventional campaign ad to say the least. you can go to our website to see the entire ad in case you missed it last night. the ad is so ridiculous that after thinking about it after the show, i realized, hey, wait a minute, no iowa television station is going to accept this ad. it was so obvious to me that colbert was lying about buying iowa tv time for the ad. i mean, what respectable iowa tv station would sell him time for that? it didn't make me feel any better to think that the rest of the news media fell for his lie because i'd really gone for it. i went for it hook, line, and sinker. i read the colbert super pac press release accompanying the ad word-for-word. i've never read a press release word-for-word on television before. so i put last word producer nick ramsey on the case since he produ

. >>> coming up, steven colbert's superpac. that's in the rewrite. >>> and a big win for democrats in wisconsin as they take two senate seats away from republicans. what does it mean for the prospects of recalling the republican governor and what does it tell us about next year's presidential election? ed schultz, just back from wisconsin, joins me next. , when. one log in lets you monitor all of your balances and transfer between accounts, so your money can move as fast as you do. check out your portfolio, track the market with live updates. and execute trades anywhere and anytime the inspiration hits you. even deposit checks right from your phone. just take a picture, hit deposit and you're done. open an account today and put schwab mobile to work for you. >>> here's who's not represented on the congressional super committee. if you don't live in one of those colored states, you are one of the 85% of the american people who is not, not represented by the congressional super committee. coming up, what the recall elections in w

. >>> coming up, steven colbert's superpac. that's in the rewrite. >>> and a big win for democrats in wisconsin as they take two senate seats away from republicans. what does it mean for the prospects of recalling the republican governor and what does it tell us about next year's presidential election? ed schultz, just back from wisconsin, joins me next. ♪ it's true. you never forget your first subaru. ♪ ♪ [ male announcer ] with the most advanced engine in its class, 50 horsepower, dual overhead cams and fierce acceleration, the gator xuv 825i will shatter your expectations. discover the fastest most powerful gator yet, at johndeere.com/gator. >>> here's who's not represented on the congressional supercommittee. if you don't live in one of those colored states, you are one of the 85% of the american people who is not, not represented by the congressional supercommittee. coming up, what the recall elections in wisconsin mean for 2012, and a controversial film about white women and their black maids in the south opens today. if

[laughter] this is "the colbert report." ["the colbert report" theme music playing] [cheers and applause] thank you so much. [cheers and applause] [crowd chanting "stephen"] [cheers and applause] welcome to the report, good to have you with us. nation, the dow lost 519 points today. it's the single biggest drop since two days ago. [laughter] everybody's trying to make sense of the markets. luckily, the new york post explained it all with today's cover story. "crazy stox like a hooker's drawers-- up, down, up"! [laughter] [cheers and applause] this is analysis everyone can understand. you get a hooker, everyone's excited that her panties are up. then the underwear starts to drop, people start getting upset, grown men are crying, clutching their heads, worried for their futures and their childrens'. [laughter] then the hooker pulls her underwear up-- happy days are here again, somebody rings a bell and everybody goes home. if you paid the extra fifty bucks for the bell. and it's not a bell. [laughter] i look forward to more of

colbert superpac is 165,000 strong, baby. hear us roar. (cheers and applause) besides, besides, you said here, you say my ad was confusing. but you know what i find confusing? you wouldn't take our money to run our ad during a 5:00 news commercial break but on the 10:00 news you reported on it for free. >> stephen colbert has purchased ad space in iowa to promote a write-in campaign for perry but spelled with an "a" instead of an "e" >> a storm is gathering over iowa. >> colbert won approval dprt federal election committee to set up a superpac in his name which means he can raise unlimited amounts of money and funnel it into campaign ads. >> stephen: thanks, amanda, great report. now over to brad with the weather-- no, wait! stay mad! now clearly someone needs to get to the bottom of this corruption. someone on the inside, like the intrepid woi reporter katie eastman who has the courage to tackle the tough issues. >> jessica, it is the longest annual garage sale in iowa. (laughter) >> stephen: katie blew the lid off garage sale gait. clear

[laughter] this is "the colbert report." [ captioning sponsored by comedy central "the colbert report" theme music playing] [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] thank you very much. [cheers and applause] welcome to the report. good to have you with us. thank you so much. [cheers and applause] [crowd chanting stephen] [cheers and applause] thank you very much. thank you very much. [cheers and applause] thank you so much. i'eç gj t to say hi to everybodyphere, d all my cousins by the dozens. [laughter] nation, texas governor rick perry has been in the race only three days and he's already blowing away the competition like it's a trespassing coyote. [laughter] in the very first poll perry has an 11-point lead. eleven! jim, let's turn the governor's collar up to 11. [laughter] this early lead is no surprise considerin' the straight shootin' perry's been doin' on the campaign trail. >> we're calling today on the president of the united states to put a moratorium on regulations across this country, because his regulations, his epa regulations are killing jobs all across america. >> s

stephen colbert. and send. [ applause ] so folks, give compulsively.cept cash, credit cards, heirloom jewelry, gold teeth, silver teeth, and teeth. [laughter] we'll be right back. [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] >> stephen: welcome barack, everybody. my guest thinks americans should be able to pick a president using the internet. yeah, like i need something else embarrassing in my browser history. [laughter] please welcome elliot ackerman. [cheers and applause] thanks for coming on. sit down. you are a chief operations officer for americanselect.org. before that you spent eight years in the marines, multiple towers of duty in iraq and afghanistan, purple star, bronze star, did you get an emmy? i'm in the saying that stuff is not good but did you get an emmy? tell me about americanselect.org. how do you pick a president over the internet? >> well, it's a simple vision in that the vision here son november 6, 2012 when people go to the polls for the first time ever there will be a third ticket that they've directly nominated. >> stephen: a thi

stephen colbert. and send. [ applause ] so folks, give compulsively.cept cash, credit cards, heirloom jewelry, gold teeth, silver teeth, and teeth. [laughter] we'll be right back. [cheers and applause] a young man with ambition met an old man at the top asked him if he had a secret and the old man stopped and thought and said: free 'cause that's how it ought to be my brother credit 'cause you'll need a loan for one thing or another score 'cause they break it down to one simple number that you can use dot to take a break because the name is kinda long com in honor of the internet that it's on put it all together at the end of the song it gives you freecreditscore-dot-com, and i'm gone... offer applies with enrollment in freecreditscore.com offer applies with enrollment in freecreditscore.com 1-800 contacts? they can't have my brand. i have special eyes. look! look with your special eyes! my brand! quality contact lenses. call, click, and now at walmart [cheers and applause] >> stephen: welcome barack, everybody. my guest thinks americans should be able

this is "the colbert report."aptioning sponsored by comedy central [theme song playing] [cheering and applause] >> stephen: thank you very much. welcome to "the report." thank you for joining us. [audience chanting "stephen"] [cheering and applause] thank you so much. thank you. thank you. that sound of your chanting is so soothing it's like putting a seashell up to your ear into which you have stuffed your own ego. [laughter] nation, it's barack obama's 50th birthday. [cheering and applause] [laughter] that's right. it's that time of year again, folks, when the president tries to convince us he was born. [laughter] we're not buying it, obama. everybody knows that american presidents are born in february. that's why it's called president's day. i'm not the only one who is angry. so is sean hannity's voice. >> economic armageddon has been avoided, but the economy remains in tatters, so how does the president react? he throws himself a lavish birthday bash. >> stephen: damn straight. instead of going to a birthday p

[laughter] but i would again like to emphasize that there is no coordination between colbert super pacrry campaign. that would be wrong and illegal. they're as separate as church and state under a perry administration. [laughter] [cheers and applause] nation, a wise man once said, "everybody shut up. stephen's talking." this is tip of the hat, wag of the finger. [cheers and applause] nation, i love the story of the garden of eden. it gives me comfort to know that every time i sin, it's really eve's fault. [laughter] boy am i gonna blame some stuff on you this weekend! [laughter] -6- that's why i'm so disturbed by a new movement to break-up the bible's most famous couple. npr's steve inskeep explains. >> for many evangelicals, a historical adam and eve is a critical part of their theology, but now some conservative religious scholars are saying publically that they can no longer believe it. >> stephen: no adam and eve? no apple? no tasteful leaf thongs? and all because these so-called conservative scientists say "there is no way we can be traced back to a single couple...given the genet

nation, can we talk about colbert super pac for a second? can we do that? [cheering and applause] of course, you know our motto. say it with me, "making a better tomorrow tomorrow." you really didn't say it with me. [laughter] and, folks, we'll get there some day because last week two young children, charlie and grace, asked me what colbert super pac stands for. folks, i was so proved that i immediately passed the buck on to you. i asked you to go to colbert super pac.com and tell me what we believe new york and already over 40,000 of you heros have responded, so it's going to take a few more days for my team of not eight-year-old malaysian child laborers to sort through your meaningful suggestions. suggestions like at barbara c taylor who says, "i stand for making the rich pay their fair share of taxes, protect interests of the rest of us who bear the tax burden and delete." [applause] or at heather mack who stands for smacking slow-walking pedestrians in the back of the head. some of us have things to do. [cheering and applause] yes. pow. thwack. yes. slo

thank you... >> this past month in iowa, stephen colbert ran political ads in iowa ahead of the iowa straw poll. the ads sort of seemed like, sort of looked like they might be for texas governor rick perry. but the stephen colbert ads encouraged the straw poll attendees to write in rick parry spelled with an "a" and not an "e." >> jobs for iowa pac are flooding the iowa airwaves, telling you to vote rick parry at the straw poll. like job for iowa super pac are trying to pander to eye wants with pro parry ads featuring cheap pornography. they think they can buy your vote with their unlimited super pac money. but americans for a better tomorrow, tomorrow ask what about our unlimited syrup pac money? we want to you vote for rick parry, too, but not their rick perry, our rick parry. we're getting all up in those nibblets. oh, yeah! on august 13th, write in rick parry. that's parry with an "a" for america. with an "a" for iowa. >> iowa! rick perry did pretty well at the straw poll. he beat mitt romney. that's for sure. he beat night gingrich, jon huntsman. governor perry received 700 vote

[laughter] this is "the colbert report.""the colbert report" theme music playing] captioning sponsored by comedy central [cheers and applause] thank you. [cheers and applause] woo! [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] oh, boy. good to have you with us. [cheers and applause] thank you. [cheers and applause] [crowd chanting stephen] thank you so much, everybody. i want to give a big shout out out here, out there to all my bronies who may be watching. [laughter]

[laughter] this is "the colbert report." ["the colbert report" theme music playing] captioning sponsored by comedy central [cheers and applause] thank you. [cheers and applause] woo! [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] oh, boy. good to have you with us. [cheers and applause] thank you. [cheers and applause] [crowd chanting stephen] thank you so much, everybody. i want to give a big shout out out here, out there to all my bronies who may be watching. [laughter] don't ride the white brony. after laugh it's -- [laughter] nation, it is exactly 11:32 eastern time, if i had not pre-taped this show four hours ago. [laughter] so i don't know whether congress has passed the compromise plan to raise the debt ceiling. or whether we defaulted and you are watching this from a cave, eating squirrels that you are cooking over a pile of u.s. treasury bonds. [laughter] now, i'm betting default which is why i spent the weekend bottling my own urine to use as drinking water. remember, you want to run it through the brita three times. [

are you ready to help me generate some ideas for colbert super pac?> with your language, you and i together can create an ad that works with democrats and republicans. that scores with the south and the north. that scores with a 25-year-old and a 65-year-old. >> stephen: okay. but the ad, the ad has to be about these ideas. >> i will commit to taking those words and finding a way to transform politics as we know it. but you've got to cooperate with me. that's also one of the words. >> stephen: i imagine that in realtime... >> will you cooperate. >> stephen: the simple truth is... >> yes or no. >> stephen: i am sorry. (laughter and applause) >> what are you doing? >> stephen: i'm trying to apologize. >> right but there's a time and a place for everything. are you with me? >> stephen: absolutely with you, frank luntz. >> let's put money on it. >> stephen: okay. >> do a thousand dollars. >> stephen: i'm 1000% down with that. >> good. >> stephen: frank, i don't know what you said but i know what i heard. (applause) frank luntz! his book is called "win" an

colbert superpac is 165,000 strong, baby, here us roar. (cheers and applause) >> stephen: i happen to foe you haven't won a local emmy in ten years. want to touch mine? (cheers and applause) >> stephen: now that was a low blow. almost as low as the number of emmies they have. (laughter) >> stephen: but it turns out that i have met ray cole and he has touched my emmy. (laughter) you see, what happened was-- (laughter) in 2008 we had just won our first emmy and naturally i went to the bathroom to celebrate. (laughter) the only other gentlemen in there who i had never met was ray cole. he offered to hold my little trophy while i peed. (laughter) i said i would rather you hold my emmy. and in return-- true story, true story. (cheers and applause) >> true story, in return when he peed i held his package-- (laughter) >> by which i mean these little parcels he's holding down there. so my apologies. did you touch my emmy and when you have touched my emmy, you've touched the best of me. so like my children, in that i legally adopt all of them. they

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