(applause) >> i know. >> stephen: well, colum mccann, thank you so much. >> thank you. >> stephen: column, the book is transatlantic. we'll be right back. thank you.

(applause) >> i know. >> stephen: well, colum mccann, thank you so much. >> thank you. >> stephen: columthe book is transatlantic. we'll be right back. thank you. d8p8$ captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org ♪ two... two, three... ♪ ♪ (humming) are you about to brush your teeth? yeah. why? no reason. (giggles) (laughs) what's so funny? eh, nothing. wait a minute. have you been using my toothbrush to polish your ass again? what?! me, bender the robot? there's metal flakes on it. and they look like ass flakes. how dare you accuse me! i would never do something like that to a friend... every single night while he's sleeping. (whirring) (whirring) who sent you?! why are you dressed like fry? 'cause i'm fry. oh! fry, you old paranoid kook. what can i get you? a hidden camera for my bathroom. i suspect a certain robot of unauthorized butt brushing.

(applause) >> i know. >> stephen: well, colum mccann, thank you so much. >> thank you. >> stephen: colum the book is transatlantic. we'll be right back. thank you. @o!j,tp$h,eñ captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org - alice, perfect. you can time us. yeah, here you go. - yes. - what is this? - oh, rancho cucapizza is having a little promotional eating contest, and the winner gets-- read that bottom line there. read that. well, it said, uh, wins free pizza for a year! - yeah, all we gotta do is eat a humonga cucamonga in under 30 minutes. - see, they make the pizza so hot that all the other dumb buffoons, they'll just burn their pipes. - but we are no idiots. our mouths will already be burned. - yep, via spoons. - mm-hmm. - we're gonna put these hot spoons on our tongues. - yep. - we're gonna burn them so that the pizza won't burn them. okay, alice, start the clock. - yeah, start it. - we need you to time us. oh, she started, she started, start. [guys screaming] - oh, god! oh, thah wath tho hot! - what do we got? - what do we got for

(applause) >> i know. >> stephen: well, colum mccann, thank you so much. >> thank you. >> stephen: colum, the book is transatlantic. we'll be right back. thank you. ßb; çu;u:u:uzuzuzuzuçuçuçuuuuzuÑ w+7áe!q(q(p]p]p]u+]á7á-á-á+ááááá captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york this is the daily show with jon stewart. (cheers and applause) captioning sponsored by comedy central >> welcome to the daily show, my name is john oliver. i'm still here for jon stewart who is spending the summer fulfilling the terms of his crazy uncle's will by spending the whole time in a haunted house. he doesn't like g-g-g gosses. my jest a junior senator from the state of new york, kirsten guilt he brand will be with us. but first we start tonight with memories. who remembers when the wall street bankers turned our financial system into a free willing casino with a global crash in which our money disappeared. do you remember? yeah, yeah. i remember that too. well, guess what? the chickens are final

(applause) >> i know. >> stephen: well, colum mccann, thank you so much. >> thank you. >> stephen: colum the book is transatlantic. we'll be right back. thank you. kkk captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org captioning sponsored by comedy central (cheers and applause) >> john: welcome to "the daily show"! my name is john oliver, i'm still here for jon stewart who, due to a comical mixup, is currently hosting "the doily show" america's greatest satirical lace centerpiece program. (laughter) he is eviscerating that lace work and that's a direct copy quote. our guest tonight is senator rand paul, he's going to be with us. (cheers and applause) he's also where we begin tonight. what has senator paul been up to? >> senator rand paul of kentucky heads to iowa. >> he has planned to visit south carolina and nevada. >> tomorrow he headlines a g.o.p. dinner new hampshire. >> i know rand paul, i think he'll run in 2016. >> what stands between the paul dynasty and 2016? >> well, i'll tell you the first thing that stands between them, three (b