but it is still clearly not sufficient, you work, currently, i believe in colombia in columbia university hospitaly. yes. so dying and death are realities you live with every day. absolutely every day. what impact has that had on your life? it changes and it changed who i am. i actually can't think of myself as someone who hasn't encountered a death a week. that person that i must‘ve been at some point of time before i became an oncologist, has vanished for me, that person... that person who was under your care. this is someone that is under my care, is a friend, or someone i've been referred to, essentially, the familiarity with someone dying, as i said, one person in the large ecosystem of my life dying once a week is the new normal for me and is the new normal for most oncologists. you're quite frank about it. you say that at times you walked down the corridors of your hospital after a particularly gruelling shift and you struggle to find the sympathy that you feel you should have for some of the patients in your care. i think for myself, i can answer for myself, that's the time i go to the lab