i'd like to thank sean penn and danielle macdonald, apologies to matt damon.hoking up on the smoke from above ♪ ♪ i'm obsessed with the poison and us what a mess cause there's no one to trust ♪ ♪ huh-uh come on honey huh-uh count your money ♪ ♪ huh-uh what's so funny there's a riot living inside of us ♪ ♪ i got paranoia baby and it's so hysterical crackin up under the pressure looking for a miracle ♪ ♪ huh-uh come on honey lyin' in a bed of blood and money ♪ ♪ huh-uh what's so funny we are rivals in the riot inside us ♪ ♪ i'm impressed with the presence of none i'm possessed from the heat of the sun ♪ ♪ hurry up cause i'm making a fuss fingers up cause there's no one to trust ♪ ♪ huh-uh come on honey huh-uh count your money ♪ ♪ huh-uh what's so funny there's a riot living inside of us ♪ ♪ i got paranoia baby and it's so hysterical crackin up under the pressure looking for a miracle ♪ ♪ huh-uh come on honey lyinn a bed of blo ♪ huh-uh what's so funny we are rivals in the riot inside us ♪ ♪ huh-uh come on honey lyin in a bed of blood and money ♪ ♪ huh-uh what's

tonight, sean penn, from "unbelievable," danielle macdonald, this week in unnecessary censorship, andtainly, jimmy kimmel! ♪ [cheers and applause] >> jimmy: welcome, hi, i'm the host of the show. i thank you for watching. i thank you for coming. hello again. [cheers and applause] those of you who watched the debate earlier tonight here on abc and forgot to turn the television off, thank you for joining us. you know, tonight we watched the third democratic debate, this

and on thursday, sean penn, danielle macdonald and green day, after the debate.ou know our first guest from one "office" and three "hangovers." he's a very funny man whom you can see spelunk as a tour guide in the new movie "corporate animals." it opens in theaters a week from friday. please welcome ed helms. ♪ >> jimmy: please, relax. >> hey. >> jimmy: relax. i know you've been very busy, haven't you? >> yeah. >> jimmy: you've been doing a lot of stuff. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: are you okay? >> i'm exhausted. i'm ready for a nap, and i was hoping you had a couch. >> jimmy: can i say something? i i'm serious here. if you wanted to take a nap for eight minutes, i'll sit here quietly and watch you, i'll be happy to do that for you. >> i do. i talk in my sleep, so it works for a talk show. >> jimmy: this could kill two birds with one stone. >> i tell horrific details about my life. >> jimmy: do you really? do you talk in your sleep and your wife hears you? >> i moan, i've never heard it, but i make a sound, and i know it coincides with nightmares. i make a noise tha

next week, we have new shows with sean penn, chelsea handler, ed helms, sharon osbourne, jd p danielle macdonaldood and three mystery music guests. whose names i cannot reveal. in fact, i've said too much already. that's all next week. >> jimmy: our first guest is a fine actor and a man so profoundly masculine that each hair in his mustache has its own tiny mustache. it's really incredible. he will be visiting 37 cities, with a one-man show called "all rise," beginning september 11th in appleton, wisconsin. please welcome nick offerman. [cheers and ♪ >> jimmy: how are you, nick? >> i'm very well. i'm sorry, i couldn't help but overhear. you have a rash on your alabama? >> well, that was off the air. we had a discussion about a medical condition guillermo is having. >> oh, gosh. >> jimmy: it's okay. he signed a release. we can get into it. but yeah, guillermo has a rash. and the doctor drew around the rash with a sharpie to see if it was going to get any bigger on the same day donald trump drew on alabama. so we were just noting that. see what i'm saying? >> yeah, right there on the panhandle the

green day will be here tomorrow night after the democrats debate with sean penn and danielle macdonaldthat. 17 years after she rocketed to fame, our first guest is now a daytime television star. season ten of "the talk", please say hello to sharon ♪ >> jimmy: hey, congratulations. ten seasons of this show. >> can you believe it? and i've not been fired yet. >> jimmy: not only have you not been fired, i believe you are the only remaining, living host of the show. did you know that? >> i am, yes. >> jimmy: i actually had them write it down. you've had ten co-hosts over the last ten years. some are still with you. >> come on. >> jimmy: how many of them can you name? >> who's on the show? >> jimmy: mm-hm. and who was on the show, too. >> oh. well, i'll start with who's on the show now. >> jimmy: you saw them today. >> who's on the show now. is carrie ann, cheryl underwood. >> jimmy: yes. >> me, marie osmond. >> jimmy: that's correct. let's dig a little deeper. can you name -- go ahead. >> go on. >> jimmy: no, you go on. you've got to name the rest of them. >> oh, julie chen. >> jimmy: mm-h

and later this week, sean penn, sharon osbourne, danielle macdonald, bill burr and two more surprise guests. which i feel like is too many surprises. right? anyway, please watch for all that. our first guest tonight is a comedian, a talk show host, a best-selling author and now documentary filmmaker. she explores the subject of race and reunites with her ex-con high school boyfriend in "hello privilege, it's me, chelsea." watch it on netflix starting friday. please welcome chelsea handler. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] how are you doing? >> i'm well, thank you. >> jimmy: i'm glad you're here. >> hi! >> jimmy: you look fantastic. i love your dress, may i say, as well. >> thank you. you look very dapper yourself. >> jimmy: i'm wearing the same suit i usually do. but i appreciate it. >> you're welcome. you're welcome. this is my first time here at t the "jimmy kimmel" show. thanks for having me. >> you've gone from a lowly talk show host to now ma maker of documentary films. >> yes, yes, i suppose it is. >> jimmy: it is, yeah. >> i wanted to kind of dig a little bit deeper. no offense. i wa