and, deidre, they even accused you of stealing money for the paramilitaries? yeah.totally shocked, totally shocked when that question came out of the investigator's mouth. and of course, incredibly serious... scared, yeah. serious, serious thing to ask people. how much has it meant to you that you can all talk to each other and share similar experiences? i think it's been great _ because in the initial stages we'd been told we were the only one and i believed _ that for a really long time. we all did. yeah. and when you kind of found out - there were other people, and other people in northern ireland as well, it was actually such a relief - and i know that sounds such a horrible thing to say. - yeah, we all feel the same. that, yeah, you found other people who'd gone through a similar- traumatic experience. but it was, it - actually was a relief. you're fighting together now. yeah. — we are strong together. we're not the only one any more. yeah _ you have had a sea change in terms of support. yes, absolutely, yeah, we have. because, as kathy says, you know, people d