warmth, the great don rickles!plause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: great to see you. look at this. everyone loves you. how are you? >> wait a minute. maybe they will start again. [ cheers and applause ] no, no. i must say that is very kind. that is something we as performers live for. that applause. sbun fortunately -- jimmy, how are you. >> jimmy: great. >> how was australia? this was called me from australia, that is how lonely he is. >> jimmy: the only phone call. >> he and molly called me. and i was talking to you like you were in l.a. around the corner. and you got on the phone and acted like you had been there. you ever go to australia? they put a dummy in the front row. no, you are very sweet yk we do that especially for you. >> shut up. >> jimmy: i want to congratulate you. >> after what i heard before. >> jimmy: i want to congratulate you on entering -- you have entered the digital age in a big, big way. first of all, you are tweeting now. >> yeah. >> jimmy: i follow you on twitter. >> i swear, my

and later this week, the great don rickles, kristin chenoweth, dave franco, nascar driver jimmie johnsonmusic from neon trees and the band from the muppets -- dr. teeth and the electric mayhem, will be here for the greatest drum battle in television history -- travis barker versus animal. [ applause ] >> jimmy: nine years ago, our first guest was best known for having difficulty distinguishing tuna from chicken. now, she's oprah rich and smarter than all of us, with a hugely successful clothing line and a new job as mentor on the new reality show, "fashion star." watch it tuesdays at 10:00 on nbc. please welcome, jessica simpson. [cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i feel nervous about asking, but are you pregnant? >> yeah, slightly. i feel like i have a bowling ball sitting on high hoo-ha. it's intense. >> jimmy: you might have a couple bowling balls there. >> everybody's saying that to me. apparently i have a lot of fluid, so whenever my water breaks, it will be like a fire hydrant. let's hope it doesn't happen tonight. >> jimmy: let's hope it does happen tonight! i would be honored to de

>> don rickles. >> i'm sorry, but he's one of the funniest people god ever made. >> joan rivers. >> and she's the other one. >> and who else? >> us. do we count as one or two? >> i think we're one. >> who are the other ones? >> well, they're all old clearly by that list. >> well so am i! >> i want to know what the age bracket was of the people who were polled. come on! don rickles, joan rivers and us. >> the writer believes -- he says you know we're fun with wine but he think we would be fun with a beer in the backyard, too. >> cold. that's cold and delicious. >> may i suggest this at a crab feast with maryland crabs. we're with you, baby. i'd love to know the other people that they have on the list though. >> and if they're all "old." you got to think they might be. >>> this is another fun subject. vasectomies. yeah! who doesn't love a good vasectomy. >> here's something crazy. there are actually doctors out there who have commercials out who are encouraging men to have vasectomies now during the ncaa final four tournament because no one will bug you when you're on the couch watching t

with jessica simpson, kristen bell, the great don rickles will be here. kristin chenoweth, dave franco, gael garcia bernal, jimmie johnson. and we'll have music from kiss, neon trees, the naked and famous, and dr. teeth and the electric mayhem, which, if you don't know, is the band from "the muppet show." and travis baker will go head-to-head in a vicious drum battle, with animal. it's man versus muppet. [ cheers and applause ] after sharing the screen with amanda seyfried in "dear john," and rachel mcadams in "the vow," our first guest has finally found his ideal mate. his name is jonah hill. and you can see the two of them in the new movie "21 jump street." it opens in theaters tomorrow. please say hello to channing tatum. [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] how are you doing? >> well. very, very well. >> jimmy: your buddy, unfortunately for you, jonah, was here last night. he told us a lot of things. >> i'm sorry for that. >> jimmy: he said, they put you in a plane full of beer. and you were drunkenly promoting the movie around the world? >

i know you talked to our friend, don rickles today. >> don rickles. he sends you his love. couple of weeks. i love him. >> jimmy: he's the best. >> the best. >> jimmy: if you speak to him again, or i'll call him myself. tell him i said hello. >> i will tell him. >> jimmy: again, it's great to have you here. joan rivers, everyone. "joan & melissa: joan knows best?" airs tuesdays at 9:00 p.m. on wetv. "fashion police" airs fridays at 10:30, 9:30 central on e! we'll be right back with maria menounos. [ cheers and applause ] how are you? we're going to head on into the interview. john, jill...mr. jacobson... what's it like driving the fusion hybrid? you can read every system that is operating by pushing a button. it's like driving a computer. what would be the hardest thing for you to give up? the miles per gallon, the fuel. when you're used to filling your car up once a week, then suddenly once every three weeks, believe me it'll be a big difference going back. when i'm on overtime. when i'm in over my head. when i have to be sharp... no matter how many time zones i've crossed

you've interviewed jerry seinfeld, don rickles.sides of people that i hadn't before i thought that was interesting. is it hard to interview people you know who do what you do? >> not really. what i wanted to do is not have it just a pe dan particular discussion of comedy. i wanted to hear what they did through the stories, through what they lived through. that's what i think made it unique. >> exactly. >> being funny with me but the story of how much they love what it is that they do. i think what's different about the series is that it isn't this dark side of comedy that everyone talks about. it's a celebration. they love what they're doing. i paired seinfeld with rickles. and it's not that they're together in the show. but after interviewing rickles, four months later, i interviewed jerry. he said i know you want to talk about things, but i got to tell you chris rock and i saw rickles last night and if there's any white light coming in comedy from any person, it is don rickles. he started to talk about him. so i put those togethe

it's like don rickles. >> yes. than he comes over to me and he's like, "aziz, what's goin' on?like my little brother, aniz? [ laughter ] don't you have the nuclear codes?" and then it's time for our photo. and he's like, "let's get a good photo." and i'm there with a friend of mine and she has a purse and he's like, "oh, put the purse down. don't worry about it. your purse will be fine. we got good security here. ha-ha!" and i was like, "whoa!" [ laughter ] this dude -- this dude acts the exact same way i would act if i was the president. [ laughter ] just walking around, talking trash, cracking jokes. "what's up? how much money did we raise tonight? $5 million? [ raspberries ] let's go to the club. let's go! let's turn that into a campaign event. $20,000 a head. i'm deejaying. dj potus. let's go!" [ laughter ] [ imitates record scratching ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: dude, "dangerously delicious." >> yes. >> jimmy: that's the name of your comedy special. "dangerously delicious." it's -- you went online. >> yeah. louis c.k. did a similar thing a few months ago. basically, you just

we'll be joined tomorrow by the great don rickels. ricklesnet and we'll have music from the band from the muppets, dr. teeth and the electric mayhem. featuring a drum battle between travis barker of blink 182 and animal. and on thursday, kristin chenoweth, nascar driver jimmie johnson, and music from neon trees. >> jimmy: our first guest is a charming and exceptionally talented, young woman. you know her as the mars kid from "veronica mars," the marshall girl in "forgetting sarah marshall," and now she can be and heard using words allowed only on premium cable in "house of lies." watch it on showtime sunday nights at 10:00. please welcome, kristen bell. >> jimmy: you look gate. everything all right? >> everything's great. >> how is your fiance? >> he's delicious. as always. yes. he's delicious. >> very good. please give him my best. >> i will. he's been very obsessed with his feet lately. >> jimmy: i noticed that about him. it's an uncomfortable thing to bring up, but yeah, he's very proud of his feet. >> it started at your house. >> jimmy: h

don rickles, joan rivers and us. >> the writer believes -- he says you know we're fun with wine but he this as a crab feast with maryland crabs. we're with you, baby. i'd love to know the other people that they have on the list though. >> and if they're all "old." you got to think they might be. >>> this is another fun subject. vasectomies. yeah! who doesn't love a good vasectomy. >> here's something crazy. there are actually doctors out there who have commercials out who are encouraging men to have vasectomies now during the ncaa final four tournament because no one will bug you when you're on the couch watching the games. >> resting up. >> you're not going to have to take the trash out. in fact, vasectomies increase during the ncaa basketball tournament according to this by 50%. >> you know why though? because the doctors throw in a free pizza if you do it right then. >> they do. >> what's better than that? a little snip, a little pizza, little basketball. yes! >> recovery takes a day or so and no one -- stop doing that! we actually have the commercial. >> guilt free? schedule your v