and jane wyatt (children giggling) with elinor donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin in father knows best. - [jim] the most what? - just most. i'm the most. no, it's most popular. i'm the most popular boy. - you? - yeah, how do you like that? - well, boy, what a job of ballot box stuffing you must have done. - i didn't stuff it. i was too busy bribing voters. - [kathy] hi, daddy. - ah! - [kathy] bud, what do you get for doing that? - oh, i get to get up on a platform - and then they'll give me a solid gold tin loving cup, and you'll have a famous brother. - [kathy] hey! - [bud] it's quite an affair. the gay 90s picnic, that's what the committee decided to call it. - i suppose you'll have to grow a handlebar mustache. - no, but we're going to rent gay 90s costumes, you know, high hats, parasols, bustles. - oh, you'll look cute in a bustle. - sure i will, especially when i'm up there dancing the waltz. - oh! - a lot of cowgirls can dance with bustles on. it's not like fighting a rear guard athlete. has lost its collective mind. - bud! - we're going to have a midway, and game posts, and

robert young and jane wyatt with elinor donahue, billy gray and lauren chapin in father knows best. why should i jot down an outline? i'm not supposed to write a theme on american systems of courts and trials. you are! - i know that. - all the legal material is right here in these books. - yes, but you've actually seen court trials in session. i haven't. all i've seen are in the movies. - well-- - hi, daddy. - hello, kitten. why don't you go down to the courthouse and watch a couple trials? they're open to the public. they've got an old movie on with a real juicy trial. you see, they claim this woman murdered her husband, but she claims that she was, let's see. she was smoking these cigarettes blind folded, and, well, that was the commercial. anyway, it's real good. come on. - well, mr. krausman. i haven't seen you in a long time. - hello, mr. anderson. is this your boy's jacket? - i didn't want to say anything until i was sure it was his. i don't like to go around accusing any boy if he's not guilty. - accusing? what do you mean? did bud do something wrong? - he sure did. he damage

a lovely view. [ chuckles ] and jane wyatt with elinor donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin - well, this is gonna be a scramble to end all scrambles. it's quarter of nine now, my train leaves at 12 noon. i have a good four hours work to do before i can leave. - you'll never make it, dear. nine to 12 is three hours, and that's not allowing time to drive to the station. - alright, i'll do four hours' work in two and a half hours. u start on a trip with this last minute rush. - oh it's always the same. i wouldn't know how to do it any other way. where's my tie clip? - oh here it is, dear. - what's the big rush, dad? your train doesn't leave till 12. - he has a whole stack of work to do before then. so don't start any projects that involve your father. - oh i'm not starting any projects. - i'll be down in the den. if there are any phone calls for me, tell them i can't be reached. what's that? - it's an adding machine. - oh. what are you doing with an adding machine? t mean to rush you, but -- - yeah i'll go right down and start. - well you see, claude has this adding machine, and so i t

(cheerful music) - [voiceover] robert young and jane wyatt (giggling) with elinor donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin in father knows best. (knocking) - oh, hi, ralph. come on in, sit down. - i hope i'm not disturbing you, sir. - no. no, i'm just trying to figure out how to pay for things we don't need with money i haven't got. (audience laughs) what's new with you, ralph? - well, sir, i want to talk with you. - the oil company i work for has offered me the job of district manager. - well, congratulations. - thank you, sir. (jim laughs) (audience laughs) the starting salary isn't fabulous, but i could support a family on it. - you could? (laughs) how about trading jobs with me? (audience laughs) (ralph laughs) - yeah. (jim laughs) but i may need it myself because i ... a certain economic security, he ... well, the natural pattern for man is to ... - to travel in double harness? - that's it, sir! travel in double harness. of course i realize, betty's the one who will have to decide, but i'm just old-fashioned enough to believe a fella should get - well, ralph, let me put it this way

. - robert young and jane wyatt (laughing) with elinor donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin (playful music) - and that's where my new office building's going to be. right on that corner. - [bud] what are you going to call it, dad? the anderson building? (jim laughs) - (chuckles) no, it's not my building. the insurance company's putting it up, not me. i couldn't afford that. - [bud] why not, a little short this week? (audience laughs) (jim chuckles) - well now, that property's out near betty's college. shouldn't an office building be downtown? of parking space, ventilation, fresh air, and enough room. (opens door) those drafty, dingy cubicles we're in now, it's so crowded you get crushed every time you pull out a filing cabinet door. - well it sounds wonderful! what's this little black square on the very corner of the property? - oh, that's the one thing that's been holding up the deal. (shuts door) a fellow holds a lease on that building, he could've renewed it for another five years if he had made certain improvements, so his lease is now expiring. - well, will you have to tear that

with elinor donahue, billy gray and lauren chapin, - he's here, daddy's here, he just drove in. now remember, don't anybody else tell him, i wanna do it. bud don't you tell him. - look at your bangs snarl, i won't. - don't even hint to him. oh mommy where is that invitation? oh never mind i found it. - call me kathy? - yes but i found it, now listen when daddy comes in don't anybody act like anything great has happend. can sit up in his chair. pretend like you're reading a magazine, and mommy... - margaret i'm home. - now listen, i'm telling him. - what a creep. - hi honey. - oh hello dear. - anything new and startling around here? - oh no no nothing at all. -hi bud. - hi dad. - wait daddy, wouldn't you like to sit down in your chair and relax? - oh i'll take 'em, you just sit down. (laughter) - what've you got in this chair, thumbtacks, glue? - listen daddy, mr. james anderson, you are cordially invited to be the special guest of your daughter kathy at the pta meeting honoring our own father. - pta meeting what are you doing in a parent teacher affair? - i'm gonna read your bio

. - [voiceover] robert young and jane wyatt (children laughing) with elinore donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin - [maurie] listen, now wait a minute, why don't we decide about saturday night? - all right, who's going with who? - well, betty's going with me -- - [maurie] what? - now wait a minute! - [maurie] what do you mean she's going with you, i asked her! - now listen, we can decide this tomorrow. - [grace] well, look, why don't we all plan to meet at my house? (everyone agreeing and talking over each other) - wait a minute, let the man through here, give him a little room, let him in, there ya go. (chuckling and laughing outside) (audience laughs) - [margaret] oh, thank goodness you're home. come and help me. quick, hurry! - why the extra bed here in betty's room? - [margaret] oh, we're having a house guest (chuckles) - sometimes betty gives me a large pain. - what's she done now? - when i came home, she was standing on the front steps with her fan club, the campus big wheels. just gave me the big brush. (high pitched voice) hurry, little man. - [margaret] get me the blankets

[ giggling ] ...with elinor donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin... [ british accent ] yes. yes. i'm ready. i will now tell you what the young man has written on the slip of paper. his name is...uh... his name is...uh... i can't quite make it out. fairly poor handwriting. the name is... bud anderson. the address is... 607... south... maple! the proverb... the proverb he has written... well, the young man has not stated it correctly. he has written... "never burn your bridges behind you before you cross them." [ laughter ] i think what the young man had in mind was... "don't cross your bridges before you come to them." miss florine, did i read the note correctly? you are completely and exactly correct! [ sighs ] man, what a mind. boy, what i wouldn't give to be able to do that. oh, he can't actually read minds. it's just a trick. what trick? you saw him read every word that i wrote down, and you know i'm not working for him. no. but that assistant is. did you hear her give him one single hint? he explained how he did it -- just makes his mind a complete blank and then gets the tho

[music playing] and jane wyatt with elinor donahue, billy gray and lauren chapin in father knows best. -(kathy laughing) -what are you doing, setting up a roadblock? you planning to leave home i hope. -i'm going to camp, three days at indian springs. i found this book up in the closet. betty must have written it. listen to this, it's real funny. "and how sweet it is to have you, dear diary "to tell my deepest heartfelt thoughts. "ralph kissed me tonight "and the drops that stain this page are my tears, "tears of joy." -look, you better put that up before betty gets home. "in a covered wagon and suffer hardship "to prove myself worthy of his love." (kathy and bud laughing) -shh, now look pint size i'm warning you. if betty finds out you read her diary, she'll bruise you. -well, it was in the closet with some old junk. she doesn't want it. -okay, it's your funeral. (kathy laughing) do you know what kathy is reading in there? -i'm a counselor. i passed the exam and got the top grade in the whole camp group. -well, that's wonderful. we have to have a celebration. -oh, i nearly flipped whe

with elinor donahue, billy gray and lauren chapin. in father knows best. - mother, mother i am ill, call the doctor... - [bud] so what we're supposed to do is... (kathy keeps singing the rhyme over bud) take some dictator like hitler or stalin or somebody... hey kathy! and show how he got that way. kathy cut it out! and then show what tripped them up finally. - [kathy] mother, mother... - [jim] well why, that's a good project you better get to work on it. - [kathy] i am... - [bud] well what i was thinking, that uh, (kathy keeps singing the rhyme over bud) you could sort of write me out a an ambulance if you don't pipe down! (audience laughing) - [jim] how about you writing out the rough draft after all you're the one who is going to school, not me! - daddy, watch how far i can go without missing. mother, mother... (kathy keeps singing the rhyme over bud) - [bud] kathy don't you know it's impolite to interrupt people when they are discussing? - [margaret] kathy i told you, no rope-jumping in the house. - yes, in comes the doctor... - [

with elinor donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin in father knows best. - ah, first place in the quarter-mile relay, huh? - and second place in the half mile. and third in the 220 and this ribbon is for fourth in the broad jump. - yeah, you just had quite a day at that track meet. - let me see them. - oh, it's a shame that these will just be thrown in your dresser drawer with all the other medals. they should be put in a frame or something where people would see them. - oh, no everybody'd think i was a glory guy or something. - i have your mail down here, dear! - you know it is too bad there isn't more use for this junk. i have all those tennis and debating trophies just gathering dust up in my closet. - well with an illustrious and award-winning family like this we should have a big trophy case. even old kath here can contribute a few awards. her spelling contest medals-- - that's brass. - it's gold! - you know it might not be a bad idea to build a trophy case at that. at least it'd be a place to store all that stuff. - hey yeah dad, let's build one. you've got a cup or somethin' you could c

with elinor donahue, billy gray and lauren chapin. kathy: come on daddy, come on. james: oh wait a minute, kitten. let me at least go in and say hello to my wife. kathy: she's not home yet, and besides, you see her all the time. and it isn't every day that you get to come home to a good puppet show. james: well, that's true. oh, where did you get this contraption? kathy: traded patty davis my broken record player for it. she got gypped, but she was the one who wanted to make the trade. i wonder where sam is. my, isn't it a lovely day. lum-de-dum-de-dum-de-dum. ow, ow, ow! stop it sam, stop it! you're a bad boy, sam. now what are youoing to do to apologize? ow, ow, ow, ow! how'd you like it? pretty good show, huh? james: is that all there is to it? james: oh no, kitten, no way. kathy: do something funny. james: well, i don't belong to the puppet union. kathy: bend down so i can't see your head. james: my size stage. a little tight for the shoulders. margaret: goodbye glenn, see you tomorrow. kathy: oh mommy! come here mommy, i want to show you something. i've got a

. - [ voiceover] robert young with elinor donahue, billy gray and lauren chapin - if this is a good hohoetty st i'll get my wish in the ing. - well, isn't that asking for pretty fast service? - i got my order in early. i made my wish this afternoon. at is sh - well, if you tell somebody what you wish for, the wish won't come true. - oh, no. that just applies to blowing out what i'm getting so you can fix up the garage. he'll have to sleep in the garage, you know. - well, who's 'he'? - a pony. it'll be here tomorrow morning, probably. - a pony is a pretty big order. i wouldn't count too much on it. - well, it doesn't hurt to wish, does it? - no, but you mustn't be disappointed. - oh, i won't be. i already have a name picked out for him. i'm going to call him cookie. cookie anderson. - when he comes here in the morning, don't anybody feed him. i want to feed him myself. okay? - okay. good night. - good night, angel. - good night. - good night, cookie. i'll see you in the morning. - kathy? - is anything wrong? - what are you doing out of bed? - well, i-- - what do you want, angel? well, i was j

(laughter) (applause) (orchestra music) - [voiceover] robert young and jane wyatt with elinor donahue, billy gray and lauren chapin ell ringing) - [margaret] jim, the doorbell just rang. there it is again. oh, who could be calling at this time of night? - [jim] whoever it is, tell them to come back tomorrow.

- yes, sir. and jane wyatt, (children giggling) with elinor donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin in father knows best. margaret: for goodness sakes! where did all the books come from? kathy: the library. i'm going to read them so i can win an essay contest, and when i win guess whose guest i get to be the next week? margaret: well, i ... kathy: wrong. greer garson's. margaret: greer garson's? kathy: yes, sir. she's coming to springfield next week when her new movie plays here, rebel lady. it's about the civil war, and our history class is having an essay contest, margaret: now just wait a minute. don't get your hopes up too high. how do you know you'll be one of the winners? kathy: oh, i have to be. she's my very, very most favorite. i'm going to work on my essay day and night every evening. margaret: well, i still say don't build your hopes up too high. kathy: did you ever hear of belle boyd? margaret: who? kathy: belle boyd. she was a beautiful civil war spy, and that's who greer garson plays in the movie, and that's what the essay has to be about. margaret: about the spy? kathy:

voiceover: robert young and jane wyatt, with elinor donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin, bud: timber!!!! timber!!! (audience laughter) boy, cutting logs is tough work. if i waited for dad to get that ax sharpened. (audience laughter) you know, that wood is pretty green too. actually to be logical about this, a fella would be smart to let that wood dry out for a few weeks. don't you think mom? i mean to be perfectly logical. (audience laughter) don't you think so mom? margaret: oh hello, mrs. watkins? oh this is margaret anderson. oh, well fine. say, is that fella you were talking about still over at your place? well the one who was cutting up all your firewood. well if he's as good a worker as you say he his, i'd like to hire him. would you do that? (audience laughter) thank you mrs. watkins. goodbye. bud: say mom, i was going to cut up that firewood. margaret: but when? it's been two weeks since we've had our trees topped. and how much firewood have you chopped? one skinny little branch. bud: it wasn't so skinny. margaret: you just stall around, never finish anything. well how do yo

(children laughing) with elinor donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin in father knows best. jim: hey, how about the rest of us? betty: i'm sorry, father. oh, here's a card for you, mother, from gorman's ladies shop. margaret: oh don't show it to me. i can't afford a new dress. (audience laughing) oh, a sale. bud: nothing for me huh? betty: mm-hmm a card. bud: yeah? betty: from a girl. bud: give it to me.

[applause] - [voiceover] robert young and jane wyatt (children laughing) with elinore donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin (audience laughs) - [margaret] wait a minute. - what did i do? - nothing, i want to know what's wrong with your hand. - oh, sorry! - there's nothing fatal. i just gouged it the other day. my car. - what happened? burn, bruise, fracture? - oh, it's nothing, i just gouged it, that's all. - when did this happen? - a couple days ago, i got it changing a tire. - did you have a flat tire? - i told you, mom, i didn't do it on my car. i was driving back from hillsboro on the old road, i spotted this car pulled over to the side of the road with a flat tire. i could see the guy was in trouble so i stopped. he had a couple of kids with him, a boy about 10, a girl about my age. - [jim] (chuckles) so that's the reason you stopped. - [bud] no, it wasn't, it was just one of those things. looked like he didn't know much about changing tires. need some help? - i certainly do. say, how the dickens do you get a tire off one of these things? brand new car. by george, wouldn't you

i took up a collection for us in the lockerroom. and jane wyatt (children giggling) with elinor donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin - oh, boy, dad this is only fun. yeah, this really swims. - is that good? - good, it's pale green. who'd you say you got this from? - wes coglund, he's an old friend of mine. i don't believe you've ever met him. - is he that bachelor friend of yours? - yes, he won it in a raffle at a sportsmen's luncheon. - well, you're a good boy, dad. i'm proud of you. when are we going to try this out? - what about this weekend? - this weekend, are you kidding? - no, i thought we'd pack up and pull out early tomorrow morning make a weekend of it. what do you think? - well, i'm with you. in fact, i'll get the gear out of the basement. we can start packing it right now so we won't have to do it in the morning. - good. - dad? - huh? - are we really going, i mean actually? why do you act so doubtful? - well, you know what happens to a lot of these trips we plan. something comes up and we can't go. - well, we're going. i have a free saturday and sunday and i'm dying to get

robert young and jane wyatt with elinor donahue, billy gray and lauren chapin in father knows best. - so, i was wondering if you'd jot down an outline for me. i'm not supposed to write a theme on american systems of courts and trials. you are! - i know that. - all the legal material is right here in these books. - yes, but you've actually seen court trials in session. i haven't. all i've seen are in the movies. - well-- - hi, daddy. - hello, kitten. why don't you go down to the courthouse and watch a couple trials? they're open to the public. - i haven't time. you see, they claim this woman murdered her husband, but she claims that she was, let's see. she was smoking these cigarettes blind folded, and, well, that was the commercial. anyway, it's real good. come on. - well, mr. krausman. i haven't seen you in a long time. - hello, mr. anderson. is this your boy's jacket? - oh, yes. thanks. where did he leave it this time? i was sure it was his. i don't like to go around accusing any boy if he's not guilty. - accusing? what do you mean? did bud do something wrong? - he sure did. he dama

captioning performed by the national captioning institute, inc. [ giggling ] ...with elinor donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin... bills, circulars, more bills. is that the best you can do for me, harry? it's from the principal of the school -- mr. sheffield. well, what do you know? what is it? just a little note from mr. sheffield advising me that kathy wrote the best thanksgiving poem of the fourth grade. kathy? say, she must be pretty good. that's a big class she's in -- 20 or 30 youngsters. oh, it's nothing, really. all in a lifetime, harry. oh, don't kid me, jim. i happen to be a father, too. so long, harry. see you tomorrow. "shall i compare thee with a summer's day? "thou art more lovely and more temperate. "rough winds do shake the darling buds of may, "and summer's lease hath all too short a date. "sometimes too hot the eye of heaven shines, and often is his gold complexion dimmed..." "and every fair from fair sometime declines, by chance, or ever-changing course untrimmed." 22, hike! kathy! yes, mommy? well, if you have to yell, yell softly. i'm developing my lungs. you'

. - [voiceover] robert young and jane wyatt (children laughing) with elinore donahue, billy gray, and lauren chapin in father knows best. - [betty] come here a second, mother, i want you to see something. - oh, what a picture. - [betty] that's the most one-sided romance in history. honestly, sometimes bud is the dumbest thing. bernice has had a crush on him since they were in kindergarten and bud doesn't even know she's alive! - well, you have to give bernice credit. in spite of everything, she's loyal. - in case you've forgotten, the junior dance is saturday night. - oh yeah, the dance. are you going? - sure, if somebody asks me. - oh, somebody will ask you. - who for instance? - oh, i don't know. all the guys like you, bernie. you're not always trying to be glamorous, and beautiful, and all that. you're just like one of the guys. (audience laughs) - thank you, bud, you say the sweetest things. - [bud] well, i mean it. - [claude] hey, bud! - oh, hey, claude. - hey, i bring very sensational type news. - yeah, what? - you been by the supermarket lately? - yeah, a couple of weeks ago, w