a message of the ellen degeneres show. oney and making it funny. >> ellen: you're welcome. we'll be right back. ♪ ♪ [applause] >> ellen: what do you attribute to the success of a long marriage? >> i give in. [laughter] >> pulled down his pants, grabbed himself and was laughing and chasing the other kids around t pygrod. so he's out there, ah. >> next, all new "ellen." owen wilson and woody harrelson from the film. plus halloween costume ideas. >> ellen: what are you supposed to be? yore honey, then ♪ ♪ that people are finally getting together. ♪ ♪ i think it's wonderful now ♪ that people are finally getting together. ♪ ♪ i think it's so groovy now ♪ that people are finally getting together. ♪ ♪ i think it's wonderful now ♪ that people are finally getting together. ♪ with a fresher bum. can i talk to you about... bums? your nerves kick in, you've got to go. is toilet paper enough? no you want that. and you want that in every port-a-let. you need the dream team. combo! imagine how great it would feel on your bum. mmmm... yeah

>> ellen degeneres. >> ellen: that is right.. name another famous bald american. a bald american. >> oh, my god. the guy who is in the fast cars. the one that just -- the movies with the fast cars. somebody else. yul brynner. >> ellen: i will accept yule brinner. that was wonderful to come up with -- i will accept yul brynner. what's the san francisco treat? >> i don't know. >> ellen: don't yell at me. >> i'm sorry, i'm sorry. candy? i don't know. what are we talking about? no, no, no. no. >> ellen: it's ♪ rice-a-roni, the san francisco treat ♪ [cheering] >> ellen: all right. once you get the first one out of the way, it's really easy, tina. here we go, gina. sxroesement and yellowstone are two of our -- >> ellen: yosemite and yellowstone are two of our most popular parks. name one of the characters from "parks and rec." one of the stars from "parks and rec." >> you. you have been on >> ellen: no. >> ok. >> ellen: nope. >> will ferrell. >> ellen: once one person falls, the crocodiles are not as hungry as they usually are. >> wil

whoopi goldberg, ellen degeneres, oprah winfrey or greg kinnear?>> yes. >> she hasn't done that many film roles. >> no, she hasn't. mostly known for her talk show and "finding nemo." maybe some day. >> very talented. >> like you. >> i know. i know. tim, love you. thank you so much, honey. >>> halloween isn't just about -- >> kath, wait, wait, wait. before you go, look what these guys are going to do for captain stubing. are you ready? on three. ♪ the love boat ♪ soon we'll be making another run ♪ ♪ the love boat >> oh, my gosh. ♪ promises something for everyone ♪ if you're a rinse us, you may have heard there's a new rinse that talks about protecting, even after eating and drinking. crest pro-health has always done that. it's clinically proven to fight plaque and gingivitis. rinsing with pro-health after brushing can take your oral health to a new level. now that's the new you need. right from the beginning i could really feel it changing something for the better. i know there's been an improvement. my pearly whites, they feel really good. [ male a

two is how many times ellen degeneres scared roberts on her talk show. >> when do you get to the point when enough is enough. are you patronizing me? >> we love our stars, but we love our quotes. but it might not be as good as we think it is. here is our list of the top five movie misquotes. >> at number one- >> if you build it, he will come. >> i always thought it was, if you build it, they will come. a common mistake in misquoted movies. well, it has happened to us all. >> that is mishearing, and someone will shorten it so someone can understand it. >> for example, at number two, dirty harry. >> he never said, do you feel lucky, punk. >> you have to ask yourself one question. i do feel lucky? well, do you, punk? >> at number three, casablanca. >> play it again, sam, makes sense. as opposed to the original line, what do you think it was? i said, play it sam. you played it for her, can you play it for me. or play the song again, sam. the answer in just a second. for now, number four on our list. one of the most misquoted movie lines in all the universe, from star wars. >> say what? >>

>> ellen: hi, selena, i'm calling from the ticket department from "the ellen degeneres show" how are e you able to come tonight? >> no. no. >> ellen: oh. oh, that's a shame. >> no, oh, my god, oh, my god, no. >> ellen: no? >> we live in philadelphia. >> ellen: oh. that's too far. >> oh, my god. someone calling about tickets. i'm talking to my family. >> ellen: i see. selena. >> yes. >> ellen: yeah, this isn't rebecca. it's ellen, hi. [screaming] >> ellen: you know what? >> oh, my gosh. >> ellen: i got your email. >> i can't believe you're on my phone. >> ellen: i'm on my phone but you're on yours. listen. listen. i read your letter. you said that your favorite part of the show is when we surprise fans at home, right? >> yes, oh, my god, yes, oh, my god. >> ellen: is it crazy -- like all of a sudden if you heard a knock at the door right now it would be so crazy. >> [screaming] oh, my god. wait. >> ellen: then someone was knocking and ringing the door bell. they couldn't stop ringing the door bell. >> yes, hi, i'm sorry, i put the phone -- ellen. [cheering] >> ellen: hi, selena. >> [sc

he was voted most likely to be ellen degeneres dressed like a football player for halloween. [ laughterer. and finally from the vikings, we've got cullen loeffler. he was voted most likely to have been a total dick in the '80s. there you go. there is your nfl superlatives. we have got a great show tonight. pearl jam is here. give it up for the roots, right there! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome to the show, everybody. we have a huge show tonight! he's amazing actor. his new movie, "the counselor," is out today. javier bardem is here. [ cheers and applause ] that's enough! that's enough for the whole show. plus, it is a big night. not only is pearl jam here to perform -- [ cheers and applause ] a song off their new number one album right here, "lighting bolt." number one! to cap off pearl jam week, we are going to talk with eddie vedder. ♪ i love eddie vedder. i love pearl jam. what a talented group. >> steve: nicest people in the world. >> jimmy: i mean, god, they're just great. they're talented, nice. they care about each other. they care about the a

i saw ellen degenerous. hilarious. >> yes, and she is dressed up as someone else as well. >> it is so funny. so she was on her show a few weeks ago, wearing no shirt, no bra really and ellen said would you like to borrow a bra from me? and sort of embarrassed her. she is so hilarious. i love that she did it. i love it, love it, love it. >> she did a very good impersonation. >> yeah, she did. >> what's the controversy going on with robin thicke and the children of marvin gay? a little back story for the folks that don't know what's going on. >> blurred lines, the line that everyone cannot get out of their head, huge song of the year. marvin gates family said that it was a rip off of one of his songs and robin thicke actually sued the family, which is a little bizarre and said no, no, no, this is my song. that's still going on. and today the kids of marvin gay filed a lawsuit against robin saying not only is it the blurred lines thing still relevant, they think that he has copied things from him in the past. an

. >>> ellen degeneres gives a waitress a $10,000 tip. >> wow.staurant who overheard people who couldn't get their paycheck because the government furlough. she was at ruby tuesday and she decided to pay their tab which was $27.75. and she said, "thank you for all the things you do for us." this is a very nice woman named sara -- ellen found out about it and had sara on the show. check it out. >> how much? >> the bill was $27.75. >> $27 -- one, two, three, four, five, six, seven -- 27, 27.75. >> she was a waitress at the time and the people who she picked up a tab for, they posted it on facebook. ellen found out about it. she decided to do something nice, as well. >> ellen makes her believe she is only getting the $27.75. and then she pulls out the big check. >> ten grand. >> she is a single mom so she was really generous. >> good for her. en grand. >> she is a single mom so she was really generous. >> good for her. mom so she was really generous. >> good for her. ♪ get out of my dreams ♪ get into my car >>> all right. the cars that nfl stars get

. >>> finally, with halloween around the corner, ellen degeneres sent two of her staffers to a hauntedgoing. [ bleep ]. >> are you [ bleep ] kidding me? [ bleep ]. >> stop it! stop it! let's just go. let's just go. >> the man is hiding behind the woman. that poor woman was left fending for herself. very funny. i'm don lemon in new york. thanks for watching. cnn films, "blackfish" begins right now. >>> orange county fire rescue? >> 6600 sea harbor drive, sea world stadium. >> okay. >> we actually have a trainer in the water with one of our whales, the whale they aren't supposed to be in the water with.

she joins an impressive company -- tina fay, ellen degeneres. carol burnett joins us by phone.ns and welcome. >> thank you so much, victor. it's lovely to talk to you guys. >> what was your reaction when you heard about this honor? >> i was thrilled. actually, i had been asked for a few years, but it couldn't -- i couldn't work it into my schedule. and i felt just terrible about that. but now, having it come at this age, i'm happy i didn't do it before. >> well, people call you an institution. they say you are a legend, and this award is a long time coming. can you give us just a sneak peek of what we might expect from you on tomorrow night's pbs show? >> oh, well, actually, i'm going to watch the show, which i'm very excited about, some of the people who are on, i'm just thrilled. and then, i'm supposed to get up and, you know, at the end, and accept the award, and just, you know, give a few remarks, which i will do. i'm not a stand-up comic. by that, i mean, i don't do jokes or anything -- i couldn't tell a joke to save my soul. >> do you know how -- >> -- people with stories

some lucky fans are going thanks to ellen degeneres. she is giving tickets at boston university.he tweeted that yesterday. hundreds showed up but they had to dress up as green monsters and wear red socks. apparently they did. >> and beards. >> cool. >> that is cool. >>> 5:25. pet owners beware. the chewy treat you might be feeding your dog that can make him sick, coming your way. >> reporter: bart service will be interrupted this afternoon all due to a reenactment of the accident that killed two workers on saturday. ,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, the bad treats >>> your realtime captioner is mrs. linda m. macdonald >>> reenacting those terrifying moments when two bart workers were killed on the tracks this weekend. that's the focus of the investigation today in walnut creek. we'll have closures to tell you about, as well. >> and a mysterious and deadly outbreak. the bad treats blamed for hundreds of sick cats and dogs. >> a spooky thick fog rolling into the bay area right now. likely to see delays at sfo. we'll have details coming up. >> and what a difference a day makes. bart trains

i think it was kind of a natural progression, we hooked up with the ellen degenerate show early on and helping iterations with her. they feel great, be able to give back like that and to do big projects and help people know that we can accomplish something for them that they can't get done for themselves in a short period of time and it feels awesome. dagen: it does feel like extreme makeover home edition. right? >> we are definitely doing huge projects, but the big differences we have a whole community and friends involved. when we show up, we have a twin 5100 volunteers that are directly involved. they are not standing by watching us, they are cutting with us, demoing with us, raking leaves, they are doing every single project and when a homeowner comes home they can say i took apart in making your home. connell: how does the process work when you pick someone? >> we need our inside men. we have one that goes away with the person that we are surprising to keep them away from the house for three days and we had the on-site person because we don't know these people so we are learning a

comedienne ellen degeneres gave the waitress $10,000 for her good deed.s left a thank you note instead of a check forÑi the two soldiers. >> we got a lot of feedback about millennials. i know sinceÑi you've been in office you've tried many times to navigate the website. melanie tweets when it comes down to having to payñr their own money, it is doubtful many will. she thinks many will be more willing to take the fine than get involved with this. >> i think it is too soon to tell becauseñr so few have been able to get on. i haven't even been able to get to the part where you enter in your income to see what your u.s.s. did i is. -- to sue what your subsidy is. i've tried hundreds of times over the last three weeks pretty much. >> thank you. that is it for us here in washington. "fox newsçó sunday" up next. you don't want to miss it. chris talks with marco rubio. >>> i'm chris wallace. the government reopens. the debt ceiling is raised but there are more budget battles ahead. >> this deal kicks the can down the road. >> there's a lot more we need to do to g

. >>> en la tarde, estuvo j lo con ellen degeneres, y no quiso responder, hablÓ del show de canto dondea casa, quiere decir que quieren eliminar a la cocinera. >>> hijo, hijo, espaÑol. >>> hay que decir la verdad. estÁbamos en una cena. >>> se me hace que la caÍda te afectÓ. mÁs adelante vamos a hablar de eso. >>> les quiero contar. >>> cÁlmate coelo. >>> se presentÓ una controversia, lola ponce puso un video donde ella se supone que estÁ manejando, y cargando la cacÁmara, y se ve a la bebita, ella y su esposo comparten su vida familiar. >>> mira, mira. >>> todos lo hemos hecho. >>> sÍ, la controversia es porque se supone que estÁ manejando. >>> estÁ peligroso. >>> lo que la gente, y lo que quiero pensar que se venden apara aparatitos. >>> no es eso, se deja de ver a la bebÉ. >>> la que carga la cÁmara y estÁ siendo irresponsable. y no, no es asÍ. pienso que puso estos aparatos que se cuelga los telÉfonos, y ella comparte con sus fanÁticos, y no es irresponsable como dicen. >>> escÚchame. a ver, a ver. aunque colgado el asunto este. . >>> estÁ mirando la camara? >>> no. la calle. >>> la

babies of the family, youngest children, jim carrey, martin shore, jon stewart, jimmy fallen, ellen degeneresly never met a stranger, affable, president ronald regan, one of five babies. he married the only child, nancy davis. birth order is interesting. it gets into what relationship is best. >> doctor, help me out here. give me some horrible trait of a first born. >> they're perfectionistic. many of them become flaw pickers. what makes you a good dentist or statistician or math teacher is the same thing that works against you in relationships. you're a man. you're lucky enough to have a wife that cooks dinner. they're getting hard to find, by the way. you come home to dinner and you find the flaw and you say, hey, what's with the carrots? i've got news to you. the question is, will you be wearing carrots shortly? it's not to be rewarded. the critical eye gets the first born in trouble sometimes. >> i'm going to stop being such a perfectionist. >> please. >> i'll just eat my carrots. dr. kevin lehman, great to see you here. the book is called "first order book" go out and buy it and taunt yo

>> ellen degeneres. >> is she right? >> yes. >> yes.o. look what these guys are going to do for captain stubing. ready? ♪ the love boat soon we'll be making another run ♪ >> oh, my gosh. ♪ the love boat promises something for everyone ♪ for everyone ♪ we all have our little tricks. mom swaps one of my snacks for a yoplait. i don't mind, i mean it's orange crème. and when mom said bobby was too edgy... 'sup girl. i just swapped him out for tyler. 'sup girl. mom never questioned bobby again. two can play at this game. [ female announcer ] swap one snack a week for a yoplait. and everybody wins. yoplait. it is so good. of their type 2 diabetes with non-insulin victoza®. for a while, i took a pill to lower my blood sugar, but it didn't get me to my goal. so i asked my doctor about victoza®. he said victoza® is different than pills. victoza® is proven to lower blood sugar and a1c. it's taken once-a-day, any time, and comes in a pen. and the needle is thin. victoza® is not for weight loss, but it may help you lose some weight. victoza® is an

ellen to generous. hundreds gathered at bart university after degenerates which she would be giving away tickets but thelk show host had a specific request. they have to dress up as a grain of monsters and where red sox. no word on how many tickets were giving out. the event was take on her segment the ellen the generous show pri. >>: and a web cam as giving people a look at life as a coliform a test-california thrift [ male announcer ] you got to love the weekend. it's like everyone came together and said, "if it's good, let's save it for the weekend." so here's to the kfc ten buck weekend bucket. ten pieces, ten bucks. any way you want it. just ten bucks every saturday and sunday. today tastes so good. top stories we are following on thisrd. bart trains are getting back to normal this morning. we will keep you updated on the tracks commute times and everything governor jerry brown has stepped in to avoid an ac transit strike. we'll have details on that. 5:00 what get the latest on the situation with a bart. we have kron4's mike pelton standing by at walnut creek keeping an eye on things this morning.