i'd have to go actually with my favorite author -- one of my favorite authors -- franz kafka.eally? okay, no. cheryl tiegs, actually. john: in the cutthroat world of beauty pageants it's not unusual for a contestant to try to gain an edge. yeah, oops. some accident. burt and ron are legendary for building quality houses that stand the test of time. w-wait! that's not burt and ron. ohh! it all comes down to this -- if he makes the shot he's buying some furniture. boy: hi. the trip to the petting zoo was going just fine until the sheep recognized sam's hat as his mother. woman: ha ha ha. man: hit him back, sam. hit him back. excuse me, honey. i've got to go. um...a little personal note -- my grandma, who lives in virginia beach, virginia, is turning 90 years old this year. [ audience cheers ] thank you, thank you. it's not so much a tribute but i want to tell a true story. i went shopping for a birthday present for my grandma and i was realizing how really hard it is to shop for old people. you know what i'm talking about? they've already got it or they used to have it and they