everybody talks about what a great dancer fred astaire was.ger rogers did everything fred astaire did, only backwards and in high heels. that talks about strength and warmth. you presume warmer and may be less strong. to overcome that you have to project some strength to be taken seriously, and you are a danger, so you have to reject warmth to keep the -- project warmth to keep the b word away. you have to do twice as much. >> for those of us who find this depressing, for those of us who want to be great at the things we are great at and not worry about who we might be offending by being awesome -- [applause] what is an easy thing we can do. smile, butways says, that is true -- my mom always said, smile. that is true. that was good advice, and she had to smile through a lot. >> mom was right. we forgot how much of our professional lives we spent telling men to stand up straight and smile. don't discount me. not a wallflower. anybody from the south, they are like, how are you doing? there is that expectation. we are talking about actually smili