do they talk in funny voices? >> some are hysterical when they talk.lk really slow. >> reporter: just how does this work? let's use max here as an example. his owner wondered why is max using the furniture as a scramming post? >> i will look at the picture. it takes -- i would say is takes me 45 minutes to an hour of time. i will let the animal talk as long as they want to go. >> reporter: of course, you wouldn't want to rush this sort of thing. so she proceeds to have a long distance clairvoyant chat with max, writing down his every word. because of that enlightened back and forth, judith has now purchased this cat tree to distract max from the couch. all thanks to a pet prophet. does your family, your husband, your friends, any of them think, wow, this lady's off her rocker? >> i'm sure they -- i'm sure they do, but if they know me, they know that i'm pretty sane grounded person also. >> reporter: now, there are plenty of believers willing to plunk down as much as $200 for dana's psychic skills. people like begin thgina who loh and low for a cat that

announcer ] swiffer wetjet absorbs and traps so much dirt you'll never go back to your old mop. [ funny voicehey, mop! wanna suck up dirt and grime like swiffer wetjet? then try the absorb-a-straw! now you're gettin' it. [ female announcer ] sorry, mop, but swiffer wetjet has a dirt dissolving solution and super absorbent pads that trap and lock dirty water deep inside the gradient core while mops can just spread it around. swiffer cleans better, or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science >>> the constitution gives us freedom of religion. i think that it's very obvious ú%at the mosque should be built some place else. >> the senate's top democrat opposes the idea of a mosque being built near new york's ground zero. senator harry rrid's statement are in stark contrast with president obama's comments. here in maryland, the candidates for governor are also reacting to the controversy over that proposed mosque. >> a mosque somewhere in lower manhattan, but simply not around ground zero. inappropriate. >> i respect the fact that it's a local new york city zoning decision. >> maryland congres

you'll never go back to your old duster. [ funny voice ] hey, duster! wanna attract dust like swiffer 360 duster? then try the magnet hat! ♪ whoa! wow! [ female announcer ] sorry, duster, but swiffer 360 dusters attract dust with over 500,000 fibers and lock it away to clean better than a feather duster. swiffer's built smarter to clean better. ♪ she blinded me with science >>> in california, two zebras got loose and ran through the streets near sacramento on saturday. the privately owned animals seemed to enjoy their freedom. they created some traffic jams as police tried to catch them. one of the animals was slightly hurt in a collision with a car. eventually they were captured. >>> reality tv actress tila tequila says she was injured at a music festival in illinois. she claims members of the audience threw rocks and feces at her on stage. she finished her performance as body guards shielded her from the flying debris. the hantin county sheriff says she complained she was injured by the stones that were thrown at her. she appeared to have some minor c

you'll never go back to your old duster. [ funny voice ] hey, duster!ract dust like swiffer 360 duster? then try the magnet hat! ♪ whoa! wow! [ female announcer ] sorry, duster, but swiffer 360 dusters attract dust with over 500,000 fibers and lock it away to clean better than a feather duster. swiffer's built smarter to clean better. ♪ she blinded me with science good morning, i'm sydnie kohara. john kessler is on vacation. the 18 year old was released yesterday... because of a lack of evidence. the german woman was caught in the crossfire of a shooting near union square sunday night. coming up at five: why police say... the case is far from closed. a series of attacks at the same contra costa county apartment complex. this is a sketch of the man police want to question. why police believe the same man is responsible for all three attacks. it's a groundbreaking of sorts for a new transportation hub in the bay area... the new transbay terminal. what it's expected to look like... and the dignitaries who will be there. and the tale of a kidnapped kitty...

swiffer 360 duster attracts so much dust, you'll never go back to your old duster. [ funny voice ] hey! wanna attract dust like swiffer 360 duster? then try the magnet hat! ♪ whoa! wow! [ female announcer ] sorry, duster, but swiffer 360 dusters attract dust with over 500,000 fibers and lock it away to clean better than a feather duster. swiffer's built smarter to clean better. ♪ she blinded me with science but women have made olay #1. not surgical results, regenerist is the #1 anti-aging serum and the #1 anti-aging moisturizer. not drastic. just fantastic, younger-looking skin with olay regenerist. >>> u.s. commanders are warning of more casualties in afghanistan as troops push into the southern region to root out the taliban. back home, the families of the men and women on the battlefield endure a difficult waiting game. correspondent terry mccarthy continues his series following the 3rd battalion first marines, the thundering 3rd. >> reporter: may 11th this year a roadside bomb kills sergeant may and corporal jeffrey johnson in southern afghanistan. half a day later and halfway arou

your old broom just can't compare. [ funny voice ] hey, broom!na sweep and mop like swiffer sweeper? then try the mop club for brooms! designed to look natural, even when wet. ♪ [ female announcer ] sorry, broom, but swiffer sweeper's electrostatic dry cloths attract and lock more dirt than a broom. and the dirt dissolving wet cloths clean better than a mop, or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science seized their bus. the hostage stan . >>> eight tourists from honk ndamukong will killed along with the fired police officer who authorities say seized the bus, a hodge standoff in manila played out over 12 hours live on tv in the philippines. rolando mendoza wanted his job back but after a gun fight with command o's the hodge tear was found dead. in all, 16 people survived, including 9 who were released before the standoff ended. camera e mine . >>> rescue cruise celebrated in chile as they learned that miners trapped for 17 days are alive. a camera lowered this to the mine shows one survivor's face. the 33 men have all spoken to crews using a

your old broom just can't compare. [ funny voice ] hey, broom!nd mop like swiffer sweeper? then try the mop club for brooms! designed to look natural, even when wet. ♪ [ female announcer ] sorry, broom, but swiffer sweeper's electrostatic dry cloths attract and lock more dirt than a broom. and the dirt dissolving wet cloths clean better than a mop, or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science hi, may i help you? yes, i hear progressive has lots of discounts on car insurance. can i get in on that? are you a safe driver? yes. discount! do you own a home? yes. discount! are you going to buy online? yes! discount! isn't getting discounts great? yes! there's no discount for agreeing with me. yeah, i got carried away. happens to me all the time. helping you save money -- now, that's progressive. call or click today. . >>> boy, the seeds couldn't plan than any better if they tried. they are under arrest though after a high speed chase through city streets, they stole a truck near mcarthur and pearson, when he tried to stop it they sped off, crashed

announcer ] swiffer 360 duster attracts so much dust, you'll never go back to your old duster. [ funny voicester! wanna attract dust like swiffer 360 duster? then try the magnet hat! ♪ whoa! wow! [ female announcer ] sorry, duster, but swiffer 360 dusters attract dust with over 500,000 fibers and lock it away to clean better than a feather duster. swiffer's built smarter to clean better. ♪ she blinded me with science like dust mite debris, pollen particles and pet dander, which can trigger allergic reactions. now, lysol is approved to control allergens on surfaces. lysol wipes remove 90% of allergens. and, lysol spray kills the source of mold allergens. control allergens and kill germs with lysol- the #1 pediatrician recommended brand. look for money saving coupons for lysol products. only in this weekend's newspaper. our new neighbors are coming over for dinner. i vacuumed my carpet, but it's still so dingy. she needs resolve deep clean powder. look what vacuuming alone leaves behind. resolve gets your carpet truly clean,,, ...the moist powder penetrates deep... ...to release trapped in dir

you'll never go back to your old mop. [ funny voice ] hey, mop!a suck up dirt and grime like swiffer wetjet? then try the absorb-a-straw! now you're gettin' it. [ female announcer ] sorry, mop, but swiffer wetjet has a dirt dissolving solution and super absorbent pads that trap and lock dirty water deep inside the gradient core while mops can just spread it around. swiffer cleans better, or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science [ male announcer ] nature valley sweet & salty nut bars... they're made from whole roasted nuts and dipped in creamy peanut butter... ♪ ...making your craving for a sweet & salty bar... ♪ ..rresistible. by nature valley. ♪ >> jimmy: well, it's wonderful to have everyone back. with us tonight, he was sent here to frighten americans in our kitchens. he has a new show called "master chef." chef gordon ramsay is here with us. then later, this is his new album called "yesterday you said tomorrow," a very, very talented trumpeter, christian scott from the bud light stage. we don't have much jazz on the show, but -- when

your old broom just can't compare. [ funny voice ] hey, broom! like swiffer sweeper? then try the mop club for brooms! designed to look natural, even when wet. ♪ [ female announcer ] sorry, broom, but swiffer sweeper's electrostatic dry cloths attract and lock more dirt than a broom. and the dirt dissolving wet cloths clean better than a mop, or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science jack, the chicken sto show you the realnew combo. i don't wanna jinx it but, i think we totally nailed it. we call it the "big chicken sandwich combo." what do you think? now it's really big. it's jack's really big chicken sandwich combo. not one but two delicious chicken patties, topped with bacon and melting cheese, served with seasoned curly fries and a drink for only $3.99. wow... great. now i'm gonna have to rewrite the jingle. >> jimmy: hello, we're back. our next guest is like yoda, harry potter and siegfried and roy all rolled into one. he's a six-time magician of the year in las vegas and the star of "criss angel: mindfreak." you can watch it wednesd

your old broom just can't compare. [ funny voice hey, broom! wanna sweep and mop like swiffer sweeper? then try the mop club for brooms! designed to look natural, even when wet. ♪ [ female announcer sorry, broom, but swiffer sweeper's electrostatic dry cloths attract and lock more dirt than a broom. and the dirt dissolving wet cloths clean better than a mop, or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science . >>> five years ago today, hurricane katrina roared ashore, causing widespread devastation along the gulf coast. more than 1800 lives were lost and communicates were left in ruins. new orleans suffered the biggest blow and today president obama joined residents and vowed to tcp/ip to lepthe struggling region reboil. trace gallagher reports. >> reporter: president obama and first lady michelle visit newly constructed homes were others were toppled by hurricane katrina. five years after the deadly storm they sit with maud smith in her living room. she had to be rescued with a boat in the flood. earlier, promises from president to a jubilant c

attract so much fine dirt on hard floors [ funny voice ] hey, vacuum, wanna attract more fine dirt?hen try the static balloon! [ squeaking ] [ female announcer ] sorry, vacuum. swiffer sweepervac has both a powerful vacuum and electrostatic dry cloths, to trap and lock fine dirt, dust, and hair or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science when pain keeps you up, nothing is proven to help you fall asleep faster than advil pm liqui-gels. rushing real liquid relief to ease you to sleep fast. for nighttime pain, make advil pm your #1 choice. >>> general david petraeus is known for his successful troop surge in iraq. now president obama's hoping he can do it again, this time in afghanistan. >> the top commander in the afghan war spoke about his strategies as we highlight the sunday morning talk shows. >> from afghanistan, this is a special edition of "meet the press" with david gregory. >> i didn't come out here to carry out a graceful exit or something like that. i came out here committed to achieving our objectives and doing everything that we can to doing that. >> you always say

you'll never go back to your old duster. [ funny voice ] hey, duster!na attract dust like swiffer 360 duster? then try the magnet hat! ♪ whoa! wow! [ female announcer ] sorry, duster, but swiffer 360 dusters attract dust with over 500,000 fibers and lock it away to clean better than a feather duster. swiffer's built smarter to clean better. ♪ she blinded me with science to finish what you started today. for the aches and sleeplessness in between, there's new motrin pm. no other medicine, not even advil pm, is more effective for pain and sleeplessness. new motrin pm. with a refreshing splash of 100% natural lime flavor. one taste and you'll find, the good time lime. bud light lime. ♪ like i'm daydreaming again ♪ [ male announcer ] degree men responds to increases in adrenaline. from the new adrenaline series, comes degree men adventure. with subs so hot they'll burn the wimp right outta ya. quench the fire with a 32-ounce drink for a chance to win the new playstation move motion gaming system and lots of hot new games before they even hit stores. subway.

attract so much fine dirt on hard floors [ funny voice ] hey, vacuum, wanna attract more fine dirt?en try the static balloon! [ squeaking ] [ female announcer ] sorry, vacuum. swiffer sweepervac has both a powerful vacuum and electrostatic dry cloths, to trap and lock fine dirt, dust, and hair or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science >>> when lightning zaps energy across the sky it can be a pretty cool sight. >> for one group of people it prompts them to ask what is behind those bolts. with that, lightning chasers were born. here's david muir. >> reporter: we've seen lightning captured on videotape. >> crazy. >> reporter: striking so fast that until now scientists have known remarkably little about how lightning actually works. new technology is allowing them to capture thousands of images every second. and watch what they can do slowing one lightning strike down, discovering that one bolt is often several distinct flashes. and when tall structures are involved, say a radio tower, lightning strike can actually originate from the structure and shoot upward. not the other way

you'll never go back to your old duster. [ funny voice ] hey, duster! wanna attract dust like swiffer 360 duster? then try the magnet hat! ♪ whoa! wow! [ female announcer ] sorry, duster, but swiffer 360 dusters attract dust with over 500,000 fibers and lock it away to clean better than a feather duster. swiffer's built smarter to clean better. ♪ she blinded me with science fish: see? you're on the bright side already-- green tea with citrus, sunny day. so...if it's cool with you, i'm gonna go for a quick swim. heh. be right back. [grunts] announcer: lipton--drink on the bright side. fish: hey! the craftsman hammerhead goes everyday. driving home nails quickly and easily in the tightest spaces. more innovation, more great values. craftsman. trust. in your hands. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- matthew fox. from "the kids are all right," josh hutcherson. and music from the swell season. with cleto and the cletones. ♪ it's "jimmy kimmel live" and now, just to be on the safe side, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ]

swiffer wetjet absorbs and traps so much dirt you'll never go back to your old mop. [ funny voice ] hey, mop! wanna suck up dirt and grime like swiffer wetjet? then try the absorb-a-straw! now you're gettin' it. [ female announcer ] sorry, mop, but swiffer wetjet has a dirt dissolving solution and super absorbent pads that trap and lock dirty water deep inside the gradient core while mops can just spread it around. swiffer cleans better, or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science >>> we're finding out more about the company behind the recall affecting more than half a billion eggs. >>> it's the first spare the air day. i'll tell you what's restricted and what you can do to help. >> good morning. time now is 5:30. it is monday, august 23rd. mike is here with a look at your back to work. and it's, for many people, back to school. it's just always a good heads up. kids are going to be out and about. >> that's right. i took a look at the school zones last weekend. remember, 25 miles an hour or slower, as slow as you need to go. we're seeing more commuters, though, because the parents

your old broom just can't compare. [ funny voice ] hey, broom! wanna sweep and mop like swiffer sweeper? then try the mop club for brooms! designed to look natural, even when wet. ♪ [ female announcer ] sorry, broom, but swiffer sweeper's electrostatic dry cloths attract and lock more dirt than a broom. and the dirt dissolving wet cloths clean better than a mop, or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science just a few simple ingredients and great-tasting mission flour tortillas make fabulous chicken fajitas, warm and yummy breakfast burritos and seriously tasty tacos. you'll find these budget-minded recipes and more ways to save at missionmenus.com. great meals start with delicious mission flour tortillas. mission. tasty tortillas. fresh ideas. >>> welcome back. if you are coming off the san mateo bridge watch out for some sand in lanes or eastbound 92 and hayward. car took out several sand barrels there and caltrans crews still trying to clean up the mess. we'll have a full look at your morning commute in traffic in six minutes. >>> later to

you'll never go back to your old mop. [ funny voice ] hey, mop! wanna suck up dirt and grime like swiffer wetjet? then try the absorb-a-straw! now you're gettin' it. [ female announcer ] sorry, mop, but swiffer wetjet has a dirt dissolving solution and super absorbent pads that trap and lock dirty water deep inside the gradient core while mops can just spread it around. swiffer cleans better, or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science here's a look at some of the >>> good morning. no big hot spots out there so far for the morning commute. obviously it's still very early. here's a live look at the peninsula. mountain view, all this traffic towards palo alto not really any big problems on the roads on 101 or 280. let's go to our maps show you more live traffic cameras and drive times. eastbound 580 out of pleasanton, out of the dublin interchange, we are seeing a little slower speeds eastbound because of roadwork. that should be wrapping up by 6:00. westbound commute direction that's live look near tassajara. starting to pick up for sure. vol

announcer ] swiffer wetjet absorbs and traps so much dirt you'll never go back to your old mop. [ funny voice, mop! wanna suck up dirt and grime like swiffer wetjet? then try the absorb-a-straw! now you're gettin' it. [ female announcer ] sorry, mop, but swiffer wetjet has a dirt dissolving solution and super absorbent pads that trap and lock dirty water deep inside the gradient core while mops can just spread it around. swiffer cleans better, or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science >>> an update on our breaking news. a grass fire in pittsburgh near highway 4 and san marko boulevard. apparently it's now grown to 55 acres. there are some homes near that fire which started just about an hour and 20 minutes ago. so far no injuries reported and once again highway 1 or highway 4. one lane is shut down affected by that fire. we'll have more on this fire at 11:00 on nbc bay area news. >> until then try to stay cool. >> until then, bye-bye.

announcer ] swiffer wetjet absorbs and traps so much dirt you'll never go back to your old mop. [ funny voicert and grime like swiffer wetjet? then try the absorb-a-straw! now you're gettin' it. [ female announcer ] sorry, mop, but swiffer wetjet has a dirt dissolving solution and super absorbent pads that trap and lock dirty water deep inside the gradient core while mops can just spread it around. / swiffer cleans better, or your money back. / ♪ she blinded me with science ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >>> and finally this half hour, a young man who is beating the odds. we all know, of course, that higher education does not come cheap these days. >> and for one college senior, that financial burden is heavier than most. that is because he is homeless. david muir has more. >> ever since high school, i always knew i wanted to go to ucla. but i never saw that as accessible or affordable or not even a possibility. >> reporter: not even a possibility, he thought. and yet, at 22, diego sepulveda is now a senior at ucla. he says his parents work in sweatshops in east l.a. he worked full-time at subway and at mcdonald'

you'll never go back to your old duster. [ funny voice ] hey, duster!e swiffer 360 duster? then try the magnet hat! ♪ wow! [ female announcer ] sorry, duster, but swiffer 360 dusters attract dust with over 500,000 fibers and lock it away to clean better than a feather duster. swiffer's built smarter to clean better. when pain keeps you up, nothing is proven to help you fall asleep faster than advil pm liqui-gels. rushing real liquid relief to ease you to sleep fast. for nighttime pain, make advil pm your #1 choice. rushing real liquid relief to ease you to sleep fast. assistance getting around their homes. there is a medicare benefit that may qualify you for a new power chair or scooter at little to no cost to you. stay tuned for this important medicare benefit information and free scooter guarantee. imagine... one scooter or power chair that could improve your may entitle you to pay little to nothing to own it. one company that can make it all happen ... your power chair will be paid in full. the scooter store. why should you call the scooter store tod

you'll never go back to your old mop. [ funny voice ] hey, mop! grime like swiffer wetjet? then try the absorb-a-straw! now you're gettin' it. [ female announcer ] sorry, mop, but swiffer wetjet has a dirt dissolving solution and super absorbent pads that trap and lock dirty water deep inside the gradient core ♪ she blinded me with science >>> that's right, we are sad to say it but this is the final installment of rob's "from the big easy to the big apple" series. >> all week long i've been exploring new york, new orleans, and of course their differences. but if there's one thing these two cities have in common, it's how they both have overcome enormous tragedies. >> reporter: they are images forever seared into the american consciousness. two of the nation's greatest cities faced with unprecedented tragedy. >> please send somebody to help us. there's nobody to help us. >> reporter: lives lost and lives shattered. buildings wiped away. chaos followed by shock. followed by unspeakable grief. >> the tragedy that we're all undergoing right now is som

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you'll never go back to your old mop. [ funny voice ] hey, mop!ke swiffer wetjet? then try the absorb-a-straw! now you're gettin' it. [ female announcer ] sorry, mop, but swiffer wetjet has a dirt dissolving solution and super absorbent pads that trap and lock dirty water deep inside the gradient core while mops can just spread it around. swiffer cleans better, or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science >>> socialite and former reality tv star, paris hilton, is fashioning a grim new reality. she was arrested over the weekend for alleged cocaine possession. this time she could face some serious jail time. cbs's tara mergener has the latest on the troubled heiress. >> reporter: it was 11:30 friday night when paris hilton and her boyfriend, nightclub mogul were pulled over by las vegas police. >> it was a strong vapor trail of odor coming from theesq escalade. >> reporter: she allegedly reached into her purse for lip gloss when plastic package of cocaine fell out. it's the post recent if a string of legal troubles for the hotel heiress. in 200

. / [ funny voice ] hey, broom! / wanna sweep and mop like swiffer sweeper?ms! / designed to look natural even when wet. ♪ ♪ [ female announcer ] sorry, broom but swiffer sweeper's electrostatic dry cloths attract and lock more dirt than a broom. / and the dirt dissolving wet cloths clean better than a mop, or your money back. / ♪ she blinded me with science ♪ hó if you fight to sleep in the middle of the night why go one more round ? you don't need a rematch but a rethink. with lunesta. lunesta is thought to interact with gaba receptors associated with sleep. lunesta helps you get the restful sleep you need. lunesta has some risk of dependency. when taking lunesta, don't drive or operate machinery until you feel fully awake. walking, eating, driving or engaging in other activities while asleep without remembering it the next day have been reported. abnormal behaviors may include aggressiveness agitation, hallucinations, or confusion. in depressed patients, worsening of depression, including risk of suicide, may occur. alcohol may increase these risks. allerg

. / [ funny voice ] hey, vacuum, wanna attract more fine dirt? then try the static balloon! now who's attractive? / [ female announcer ] sorry, vacuum. swiffer sweepervac has both a powerful vacuum and electrostatic dry cloths to trap and lock fine dirt, dust, and hair better than a leading upright vacuum / or your money back. ♪ she blinded me with science ♪ hó n honking. a short time ago, this woman suffered from limited mobility. / a month ago thi man wasn't even able to get / around his house. these people chose freedom over restrictions. independence over limitations. they chose mobility. they chosehe scooter store. and this is the team of mobility experts who made it all happen. ii great news, you've been approved for payment. dr. cruz, i'm calling on behalf ofmarie stanford. and they can make it happen for you. hi, i'm doug harrison, if you're living with limited mobility, call the scooter store today. i promise, no other company will work harder to make you mobile or do more to ensure your total satisfaction. i expected they'd help me file some paperwork with medicare

cleveland is voiced by a very funny comedian that i went to college with. >> larry: do voices come easily are you a mimic? >> yeah. i used to do impressions a lot as a kid and, you know, i was always kind of fascinated by dialects and whatnot. and there's -- >> larry: is the brian character you? >> in some ways, yes. in some ways. >> larry: some ways or more ways? >> yeah, yeah. he's -- >> larry: we have some tweet questions. i'll lay them on you. is baby stewie gay or bisexual? >> we haven't really decided. there was a bit of press that came out a while back in which stewie was outed as being gay. and it was kind of taken out of context. it was in reference to an episode we had thought we were going to do and then abandoned. but we haven't made that decision yet because we get a lot of comedic mileage out of both sides. >> larry: like the character that used to be on "saturday night live"? >> yeah. pat. >> larry: pat. >> yeah, yeah. >> larry: another question on our facebook page. will "family guy" ever come to the big screen? >> eventually, i can say almost with certainty that it will.

voice. it's pretty funny. makes a trip to the dry cleaner's more entertaining.t out with a ride with snoop. watch. it drives good? >> real smooth, slow motion. >> larry: we're going to go up and down, bounce? what purpose do you have? >> that's call low riding. it's dipping. on the west coast, that's what we do. >> larry: i don't dip. my car don't dip. >> i'm going to show you how to dip, larry. let's get it in. dip dip. >> larry: what was the model number? >> 1967 pontiac parasini. >> larry: i've never heard of a parasini. >> it's low to the floor too. >> larry: i'm low to the floor. whoa. >> i told you it was low to the floor. >> larry: whoa. >> turn around when possible, and keep it "g," you dig? after 300 yards, you have reached your destination. thanks for the ride, man, i had the time of my life. oowee. >> larry: what's the name of the magic? >> this the the magic. >> larry: i'm still on the brake, why are we moving? >> that's me hitting the switch, baby. >> larry: oh, you're controlling the gas. >> i'm controlling it. >> larry: bye. ♪ with my mind on my m

voice in here. in a market oriented society, the number of -- i don't know what's so funny about that. >> quickly. > the society, the tools that a president has are limited and the republicans are blocking what few tools he has. they are blocking legislation that would help small business and in truth, when he took over, we didn't know if the banking system would survive. we didn't know if we would have an automobile industry. we have gm thriving and we have wall street doing fine. the benefits have not made it down to ordinary people. he needs more time for that. >> five seconds. when will his recovery kick in? >> i don't believe you can predict that sort of thing. we are >>> predictions, pat. >> fitzgerald should not retry blago, but he will. >> newly released corporate money and money raised by outside groups are going to give the republicans a huge fund raising advantage going into the november elections. >> david. >> in kentucky, the democrats recalling ran paul an extremist. in the end, voters will be more scared of a democrat. >> in kentucky? >> in kentucky. >>> the high unemployment numbers

voice ] does not compute. error. [ all ] error. error. error. malfunction, babs. beep. boop. boop. ha ha. very funny. powering down. [ new guy ] we're not really robots. [ thomas ] i thought we were. [ male announcer ] want a great deal on car insurance? go to esurance. >> larry: wanda just told us she was beaten for an emmy by the kennedy center honors. one of the other programs up for the honor was "hope for haiti." what if you had beaten hope for haiti? >> what was i supposed to do? i got your hope, haiti, look at this. >> larry: let's take a call for wanda sykes. port saint lucie, florida, hello. >> caller: hi, wanda, not only are you the best comedian, you're the best comedian out there and you have the best laugh. but my question stems from this. >> thank you. >> caller: when president obama was elected, i was so proud this country was progressive enough to elect a nonwhite elderly man. and now during this situation where he's being attacked from all end, the tea party, these nonissues about the birth certificates. how do we cope with that? and get the facts out there? >> you know, thank you, a

funny or die. here it is. >> hi, pearl. >> where's the rent? >> you don't have to raise your voice. >> you pay now! >> i can give you half. >> you pay now, bitch. >> don't talk to me like that, okay? >> i'm tired of this crap! >> look, i thought i was clear in me e-mail i needed a couple weeks. >> i work too hard! >> can i get two more weeks? >> i want my money. >> you need to relax. >> i want my money, bitch. >> don't call me bitch! i'm a grown man! >> bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch. >> god, you're mean. (laughs). >> don't make fun of me crying. >> you'll be evicted. >> i'm not doing so good, pearl. >> i put you out on the street! >> pearl, i'm going to pay you. i'm working three jobs right now, working nights, i'm driving a cab, i'm inside with my buddy right now going over my resume. >> i'm gonna smack you. >> okay, you know what? you need to relax. >> i want my money! >> look, why do you need your money so fast? come on? >> i need to get my drink on. >> you scare me. you're an alcoholic. >> can i have some beers? >> seriously, you are an alcoholic. yeah, you're drunk. i knew it. you're already drun

voice ] does not compute. error. [ all ] error. error. error. malfunction, babs. beep. boop. boop. ha ha. very funny.owering down. [ new guy ] we're not really robots. [ thomas ] i thought we were. [ male announcer ] call today or go to esurance.com. basic.? preferred. okay. at meineke i have options, and 50% off brake pads and shoes. my money. my choice. my meineke. >> larry: nita hanson is with us from denver, colorado. it was during her phone call to the dr. laura show last week that the radio host used the n word 11 times. nita, referred to as jade by dr. laura, called in asking for advice about dealing with resentment she felt about comments made by her white husband's friends and family. listen to some of what happened, then we'll talk with nita. >> how about the "n" word? now, the "n" word's been thrown around -- >> black guys use it all the time. turn on hbo, listen to a black comic, and all you hear is [ bleep ]. i don't get it. if anybody without enough melanin says it, it's a horrible thing. but when black people say it, it's affectionate. it's very confusing. >> larry: nita, thanks for jo

funny as he ever was. he was improvising. it was insane. >> jimmy: i'm so happy. i'm so happy he's back because i saw "toy story 3," and he's in -- he has a voicee on -- but you're bringing him back! >> by the way, no response from the audience at all to any of these movies. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: we add -- no. they save it up. they save it up. >> do they? okay. >> jimmy: they save it for the right one. "mr. mom." [ cheers and applause ] [ rhythmic applause ] >> jimmy: they like fist pump. the like to fist pump. they love that stuff. >> oh, and a little movie called "gung ho." come on! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ rhythmic applause ] >> jimmy: that one, "batman." [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ rhythmic applause ] >> jimmy: and now he's in -- >> -- sincere clap along ever, by the way. >> jimmy: i know. it's the disco clap, where we make them do it. >> for "gung ho." yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: "gung ho." >> "oh, it was great today, honey. we were in new york, they talked about 'gung ho' on the talk show. it was crazy." >> jimmy: "my life." i like "my life." [ laughter ] yeah, they know how to do it. but, anyways, you brought him back. he's super funny in

voice talent and good scripts. and you are trying not to offend viewers, especially those that will support you. host: what is the impact of a funnysement? you have seen the use of them increased over the years, especially in the 2008 presidential campaign. guest: this is where it becomes more of an art than a science. a lot of humor, works when there is a really competitive race that has had a lot of negative advertisements and you want to break the tension. you want to be the person at the table that cracks the joke that makes the two uncles stop fighting. and if it is sent with a velvet hammer -- a bold hand as opposed to a scary hammer. fdot -- a velvet hand as opposed to raise gary hamel. hong there are some -- there are some that do it very well. host: in the florida senate race, is one of the most watched races for that seat and highly contested. marco rubio, the republican candidate, is out with his first ad. the democrats' kendrick meek has not come out with an advertisement since he won the primary, and charlie crist has not come out with one either. let's take a look at marco rubio's advertisement. >> my parents came to

voice talent and good scripts. and you are trying not to offend viewers, especially those that ll support you. host: what is the impact of a funnysement? you have seen the use of them increased over the years, especially in the 2008 presidential campaign. guest: this is where it becomes more of an art than a science. a lot of humor, works when there is a really competitive race that has had a lot of negative advertisements and you want to break the tension. you want to be the person at the table that cracks the joke that makes the two uncles stop fighting. and if it is sent with a velvet hammer -- a bold hand as opposed to a sry hammer. fdot -- a velvet hand as opposed to raise gary hamel. hong there are some -- there are some that do it very well. host: in the florida senate race, is one of the mt watched races for that seat and highly contested. marco rubio, the republican candidate, is out with his first ad. the democrats' kendrick meek has not come out with an advertisement since he won the primary, and charlie crist has not come out with one either. let's take a look at marco rubio's advertisement. >> my parents came to ame

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voice ] does not compute. error. [ all ] error. error. error. malfunction, babs. beep. boop. boop. ha ha. very funny. powering down. [ new guy ] we're not really robots. [ thomas ] i thought we were. [ male announcer ] call today or go to esurance.com. about this "dedicated claims rep" thing. okay, well... calling yourselves "dedicated"? we're all dedicated, okay? the entire web site team worked late every night this week. look at sanjeev. he's a mess! what? no... guys, we're called dedicated claims reps because we each stay with an esurance customer throughout the automobile claims process. it's not because we think we work harder than you. well, you don't. [ sanjeev ] am i a mess? [ joey ] you slept in the vending machine. [ male announcer ] call today or go to esurance.com.

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voice ] does not compute. error. [ all ] error. error. error. malfunction, babs. beep. boop. boop. ha ha. very funny. powering down. [ new guy ] we're not really robots. [ thomas ] i thought we were. [ male announcer ] call today or go to esurance.com.