♪ ♪ come and play ♪ everything's a-ok - ha ha ha! ha ha ha! where we meet ♪ can you tell me how to get ♪ ♪ how to get to sesame street? ♪ ♪ can you tell me how to get to sesame street? ♪ - [giggling] - this is gonna be so much fun! - this is--this is such a great idea! oh, they're here, they're here! hi, there! - welcome to sesame street. - you are just in time to join our... - excellent eyes club! - do you know why eyes are so excellent? - you can see with them! - ♪ we have 2 eyes ♪ so we can see - ♪ bees in the trees - ♪ and toys in the tub - ♪ we're the excellent eyes club ♪ - come on! we're going to use our excellent eyes to help people on sesame street. - you can help, too! - oh! and don't forget to bring your eyes. - where did that other glove go? - ooh! does leela need help seeing? - because we've got the eyes to do it. - ♪ we're the excellent eyes club ♪ - this is perfect. i really do need some extra eyes right now. - oh. well, we each have 2. how can we help you? - i can't seem to find my other gardening glove. it looks just like this

ha ha ha ha! ha ha ha ha! he's always so funny. can you go soon? ok, sweetie, it's nap time now, ok? you want me to get 'em up? oh, no, i'll get 'em. i love caring for the children. it's so...fulfilling. [cooing voice] ok, come on. come on, ally, let's go. i'll read you a story, ok? i'll be just a minute, all right? and, uh, ray. don't... don't what? just don't. so, ray, what's it like having 3 children under the age of 5? well... i like to tell people it's kind of like a frat house. yeah. nobody sleeps, everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up. can i quote you? why, you like that? oh, yeah, i do. debra: get back in that crib now! said the mama bear to the three little bears. she tells great stories, doesn't she? ray: oh, no. ray, there's a big black car parked in your driveway. yeah. debra's got some company, all right? so-- you know who drives big black cars? the feds. it's my car. i'm here to see debra. ooh, wait a minute. say something else. hello. i'm dr. nora. oh, that voice. are you dr. nora? that's me. ohh! oh ho ho! i can't tel

ha ha ha! [fast-forwarding] ahh! [fast-forwarding] ooh! [fast-forwarding] ha ha ha! ha ha ha! taking you to a party. aha ha ha! [fast-forwarding] [indistinct chatter] [fast-forwarding] come on. it'll be fun. [indistinct chatter] [fast-forwarding] [indistinct chatter] doreen: no. come to daddy. i need to go. eddie: ha ha ha! doreen: i need to leave. i need to leave. [indistinct chatter] doreen: no. [tires squeal] [honk honk honk honk] [ding] [easy listening music playing] [ding] [easy listening version of jingle bells plays] [ding] jack, what do you say, jack? you pick me a winner today, huh? did you come up with a sure thing? [click] [jingle bells continues] it's a bad time, con. boy, you're tellin' me. you remember peter, don't ya? jack! jack! no! no, jack! say, jack... when i said, "you take care of the business, or the business will take care of you," did we have a bad connection on the cell? maybe you weren't listening. hey, sport, i was real sorry to hear about you and audrey. what are you gonna do? he's the big dog. there's no way around that. he gets the girl, jack. you

steve: ha ha ha! number two. ha ha! audience: garage. steve: well, chambers 160, coniglios 59. is anybody's game, though. so don't go away. we'll be right back, folks. yeah. announcer: closed captioning is sponsored in part by... ♪ ♪ all the goodness of milk, all the deliciousness of hershey's syrup. the intense ache made it hard to do the things that i wanted. my doctor diagnosed it as fibromyalgia -- thought to be the result of over-active nerves that cause chronic, widespread pain. lyrica is believed to calm these nerves. i learned lyrica can provide significant relief from fibromyalgia pain. so now, i can do more of the things i enjoy. lyrica is not for everyone. it may cause serious allergic reactions or suicidal thoughts or actions. tell your doctor right away if you have these, new or worsening depression, or unusual changes in mood or behavior. or swelling, trouble breathing, rash, hives, blisters, changes in eyesight including blurry vision, muscle pain with fever, or tired feeling. common side effects are dizziness, sleepiness, weight gain and swelling of hands, legs

>> ha ha ha! >> ha ha! good one, don. ha ha! ty famous in the ceratopsian family. >> what's a ceratopsian? >> glad you asked, mr. the don. ceratopsians are a group of big horned dinosaurs who also have frills. who can name this one? >> triceratops! >> that's right! and while all ceratopsians have horns and frills like triceratops, none of them are as showy as styracosaurus. >> ooh! >> see that massive frill and huge spikes? you can bet they get styracosaurus a whole lot of attention! >> can we meet a styracosaurus? >> well, your mother's right. there is a local styracosaurus family that hangs around the big pond. oh! and speaking of which, big pond! next stop, big pond! >> bye, mr. conductor! >> bye! have a frill a minute with styracosaurus. >> [squawk] look! isn't that tank? > let's sneak up and surprise him. can we, mom? >> [squawk] sure. >> [giggling] >> hey! who do those pteranodons think they are flying right above us big triceratops? pteranodons? hey, guys! those pteranodons are my friend... buddy?! >> ta-da! >> buddy! grea

>> ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! -- >> andrew, i gotta tell you-- your laugh scares the [bleep] out of me. >> because it's a farce. what neil did was reach down and push the dog back, at which point, the dog bit him. >> it sounds like he was just trying to stop the dog from running in the street. >> i was horrified. why--why would you do that? >> as andrew's ranting and raving, neil walks in. instead of andrew using some sort of decorum or discretion or shutting his mouth, he continues. he actually gets even more amped up. >> and then he comes up to my office yelling and screaming at me that i should have shown more compassion. >> but i think when that happens, i think what people are looking for is some level of sympathy. >> that's not--again, my staff has to function a right way. >> i know. >> when neil started working here, and i told him to this-- to his face--i had big hopes for him. >> when you say that to somebody, "i had high hopes for you..." >> neil did not hear that from me until we had a huge argument in t

ha, ha, ha. ha, ha, ha. ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. >> jon: how do you even get a which with that. how do you get anybody to work for you. >> jon, we've been at 7% unemployment for five years. being an employer this year is like being a girl at comic kopp. does not matter who offensively and your precrisis your supergirl costume is. you are to the going home alone. it's all about the head band, john. >> jon: i understand that. john hodgman, deranged millionaire. >> jon: hey, it seems like there's been a lot of bad news recently. because there has been a lot of bad news, recently. but that's why it's all the more important to celebrate the good news. >> your new miss taerk -- miss america is miss new york in new york, the miss new york, make you feel-- new york put your hands on your head like you just don't care. >> that's how we do. >> i'm an increasingly old man. >> i'm just really proud. >> last night 24-year-old nina davuluri was named miss america for 2014. she is the first american of indian des ent ever to win the crown and is happy the pageant organization has embraced diver

♪ ♪ come and play ♪ everything's a-ok - ha ha ha! ha ha ha! ! - and welcome to sesame street. - that's what i just said. - you did? - yeah. - oh. heh heh heh. yeah. you did--ohh! what's that? - oh, no! i don't get it! why doesn't this fit? - ¡hola, mando! - hey! ¡hola, rosita! - hey, hey, hey, hey! - hi, telly! - what's going on here? - haven't you heard? it's the latino street festival. pretty cool, huh? - yeah! - very cool! - yeah! - there's a lot of people here from all of latin america and a different booth for each one of them. - wow! - yeah. you see that one over there? that's the one supposed to be for puerto rico, where i'm from, if i ever get to figure it out. - uh, yeah. it looks kind of tricky. - well, it is, but i'm sure i'll get it together. why don't you guys go and enjoy the festival and have fun? - all right, all right. - ¡muy bien! - see you later, mando! - ¡adios, mando! - heh heh heh. oh, wow! look, telly! - look at all these different booths. - oh, oh, oh! telly, telly, look! come here, come here, come here! this is the boot

ha ha ha! >> ha ha ha! >> but we're too big! ha ha! bye! >> bye! >> aw. hing i could do about it, but they're just too big. oops! better call it. time tunnel! time tunnel approaching! next stop, troodon town in another part of the cretaceous time period. we're taking the train into the roundhouse to switch out some cars. care to come along and watch? >> yes! >> come on, kids! awk! >> [groaning] >> oh! this is exciting, isn't it, kids? >> yeah! so many different cars for different kinds of jobs, the aqua car for sea creatures. >> what's that big flat car for? >> that's actually what it's called, tiny, the flat car. >> they put piles of branches on it for the biggest herbivores to eat. >> ohh! come on, everybody! mr. conductor, i just got a great idea! you know we wish that arnie and the other big sauropods could ride the train, right? >> well, sure, tiny, but you know they are too big to fit in the cars. >> whoa! you mean they could ride on the flat car? >> hmm. you know, tiny, maybe we could actually do it. >> [all talking at once] >> just imagine. what if

♪ ♪ come and play ♪ everything's a-ok - ha ha ha! ha ha ha!ll, if you must know mr. nosey, i'm, uh, taking an online science class at grouch night school, also known as p.u. - p.u.? - yeah. putrid university. - ♪ p.u., p.u., we'll always be loyal to you ♪ - yeah! - p.u. - yeah. i'm trying to get my b.o. degree. - b.o. degree? - it stands for "bug off." - i was just leaving. heh heh. well, oscar, enjoy your class. - oh, yeah. yeah. enjoy. hmm. - and now give a big grouchy welcome to the star teacher of p.u. professor nikola messla! - yeah! - hey. is this thing on? - ♪ this is grouchology school ♪ ♪ the place where grouches from alaska to kentucky ♪ ♪ learn to question and observe things ♪ ♪ that are noisy and/or yucky ♪ ♪ yes, this is grouchology school ♪ ♪ the place where grouches from ohio to nebraska ♪ ♪ learn to ask the grouchy questions ♪ ♪ grouchy science needs to ask-a ♪ sardines--delicious or disgusting? - ♪ you'll study things that are icky ♪ - ♪ things that are sticky - ♪ things that are bumpy or lumpy ♪ ♪ or messy or shoddy ♪ and whi

ha ha ha! >> hi, buddy. hi, tiny. i wanted to surprise you by hiding behind the station, but i think i'm getting too big to hide behind it anymore. >> i know. your head sticks out one end, and your tail sticks out the other. >> i think you're even bigger than the last time we saw you, arnie. >> yup. i'm still a-growing. pretty soon, i won't be able to hide behind anything. >> no more hide-and-seek? >> nope, but there are good things about being this big, too. when we're full grown, argentinosaurus don't have any predators. >> you mean, big meat-eating carnivores that want to eat you? >> right! they don't even bother trying to eat us. >> wow! that's amazing! >> but while you're still a kid, you stay near one of your parents, right, arnie? >> right. there's dad right over there. hi, dad! >> hey, hey, arnie! oh. hi, pteranodon family. >> hello, mr. argentinosaurus. so good to see you. >> wow! i can see why predators don't even bother trying to eat a full-size argentinosaurus.

>> ha, ha, ha! >> bicycle! >> ha, ha, ha! >> is that a heineken? >> oh, no. >> okay. okay.ello. >> yes. we need you down here now. >> isolate him and i will be right there. >> thank you very much. i appreciate it. >> i will break this man and no matter what you hear, no matter what moans of agony you hear, do not open that door. >> i promise. >> oh, my

, ha, ha, ha! by then we'll have made a fortune. ha, ha, ha! >> you're missing the point, larry. ut the money. has it been tested to seeyji if there are any side effects? >> of course. we've done a tremendous amount of medical research. i have all the results right here. >> this is it. i'm done. i want out right now. >> i'm afraid it's too late. you signed a contract. >> you can't force me to do this. >> unfortunately, i can. you still owe me four commercials. and if you don't work for me, i'll make sure you can't work for anybody else. you know how contracts work, bobby. tell him. >> he's right. >> you just got kung powed! >> not yet i haven't. this is just round one, kung. you want a fight? you've got one. come on, bobby. let's go. >> yeah. oh, and for your information, your office is tacky. pow! >>> can you believe what just happened? >> i know. >> how can you say you don't care about the money? >> i'm talking about larry. he knew there were side effects and he shredded the evidence. what kind of person does that? >> a horrible one. note to self, buy shredder. >> the kids were

ha ha ha! - yeah. i like his kisses. - all right. - ken jackson wishes more medical students would follow his path, treating patients from toddler to twilight. but his assistant says ken's example may be changing some medical students' minds. - we've had several that say, "i was going to go "into whatever, but i've decided to do family practice "because this is what i wanted, this is why i went into medicine." [baby crying] - minutes-old dominic bailes nearly didn't see this birthday. a car accident crippled his mom. other doctors told her to terminate the pregnancy for her own health, but ken jackson found a way for her to deliver dominic safely. - they told me that my baby would be fine, and if it wasn't for them, i probably wouldn't have him right now. - whether it's the clinic, crisis, or canyon care, ken jackson has found his own trail, one he says he only plans to leave when he draws his own last breath. - howdy, howdy. when it's 6:00 at night, and i'm home and i'm sort of worn out from the day, i

[laughter] >> the thing about working with hugh jackson -- >> jon: ha ha ha ha. [laughter] >> i had a beard. >> here we go. >> there's just a touch right under the chin just little bit. let me tell you what's going to happen to that. [laughter] let me tell you about -- >> you don't have to say a thing. you're saying it on the top of your head. [laughter] >> that was beautiful, that was beautiful. [applause] >> i am dorian grey. i am the embodiment. do you have something in your attic right now. come on gil gyllenhaal. >> it's crazy. when you get older it's like i have [bleep] in my pants. >> we got from the top to the bottom. >> to the bottom, my friend. >> but things are good otherwise. >> everything is great, yes. >> someone was asking me earlier in the audience about batman. would you do, because they're like what do you think of ben affleck. i think he will do great as batman. i'm not bothering by casting choices. >> that's good. >> yeah. [laughter] why do you think that's such a hullabaloo. >> because everybody has their ideas and they're entitled to it and i

>> ha, ha, ha! >> bicycle! >> ha, ha, ha! >> is that a heineken? >> oh, no. >> okay. okay. we need to fix this. >> hello. >> yes. we need you down here now. >> isolate him and i will be right there. >> thank you very much. i appreciate it. >> i will break this man and no matter what you hear, no matter what moans of agony you hear, do not open that door. >> i promise. >> oh, my god! >> now, that is it, i am going in. i am going in. >> god bless america! >> i did what i could. thanks. [ cheers and applause ] >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart! captioning sponsored by comedy central >> >> stewart: hey, everybody! how are you? >> what's happening? nice to see you! ah, ah! >> this is the daily show. my name is jon stewart. a great one tonight. andrew harper, the head of the u.n. agency refugee camp on the syrian border in jordan. >> whee! >> i missed you so much! >> you don't know what it is like out there. living all by myself. nobody to applaud every stupid little (bleep) you do! [ cheers and applause ] >> i ha

ha ha ha! good one. steve: "hey, uh, when you get through viewing that body..." ha ha!hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, come on now. hey, come on, baby. stop all that crying." [laughter] a funeral. >> yeah. steve: chad, good to see you, mr. firefighter. congratulations. love your work, man. name a place where it would inappropriate to hit on the opposite sex. >> the workplace. steve: the workplace. >> way to go. good job. steve: hello, haley. good to see you again, darling, beautiful mother with the two kids and all. name a place where it would be inappropriate to hit on the opposite sex. >> at your child's school. steve: at your child's school. [buzzer] ok, diane. name a place where it would be inappropriate to hit on the opposite sex. >> for a doctor to a patient? steve: a doctor to the patient. i like that answer. a doctor to the patient. >> yay! steve: you're in up there having a baby, and he hitting on you, that's--oh... oh...man. don, you got to be careful. we got two strikes here. the scott family can steal. >> at a wedding. steve: at a wedding. [buzzer]

ha ha ha ha ha ha! leslie, guess what today is? it's hump day. whoot whoot! how happy are folks who save hundreds of dollars switching to geico? i'd say happier than a camel on wednesday. hump day!!! yay!! get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. eat right, not less. [ woman ] hi! this looks interesting! what's going on here? would you like to try some hot cereal? [ women ] sure! [ female announcer ] introducing special k nourish hot cereal. special k? wow! wow! [ female announcer ] made with superfoods... [ woman ] there's, uh, quinoa, barley. i can definitely taste the quinoa. good! i can't believe that's less than 200 calories. [ female announcer ] ...to help you truly shine. this is a way to be good to me. [ female announcer ] nurturing yourself. what will you gain when you lose? [ female announcer ] nurturing yourself. forgfructis hydra. get recharge shampoo.asts! with beads that burst, and a superfruit blast. hair is silky, surprisingly weightless - hydrated for 2 full days. fructis hydra recharge >>> time to take so

ha ha ha ha ha ha! leslie, guess what today is? it's hump day. whoot whoot! ronny, how happy are folks who save hundreds of dollars switching to geico? i'd say happier than a camel on wednesday. hump day!!! yay!! get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. >>> at least four people are dead following dangerous flash floods in colorado. this is a video of some of it. look at the destruction and flooding. thousands of others are stranded. national guard troops started lifting 300 residents from liting james town. that town has been cut off from power and water. one woman describes her experience. >> can't get water. after that no electricity. i have a one month old baby. i can't see to change his diaper in the middle of the night. it felt like i was in a horror movie. >> the forecast calls for more heavy rain through sunday. >>> the massive boardwalk fire that engulfed sections of seaside park and seaside heights in new jersey is under investigation tonight. new video shows where the fire started. it destroyed at least 30 busines

ha ha ha ha ha! leslie, guess what today is? it's hump day. whoot whoot! ronny, how happy are folks who save hundreds of dollars switching to geico? i'd say happier than a camel on wednesday. hump day!!! yay!! get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. >>> and the cdc and numbers show on track to be the worst for measles in more than ten years. people who refuse to vaccinate their children are part of the reason for the increase and doctors say one in every 1000 children that get the measles could die from it. it can be prevented with the mmr vaccine. kids should get two doses one at 12 months and then before entering school. >>> and all right. we all mean well especially if we watch our weight. and but some of the food we think are helping us are actually they're not. so, for example. smoothies you think it will be good for you but it depends on where you get it. >> a large smoothie can be 800 to 1200 calories. some women that can be the total allotment for the day. >> experts recommend that you make your own so you can c

ha ha ha! >> oh, you lived here, mr.uide. nobody can see me but you and florence. >> how did i get so lucky? >> ok, but that's impossible because you're right here. >> oh, you'll see.

ha ha ha ha ha ha! leslie, guess what today is? it's hump day. whoot whoot! olks who save hundreds of dollars switching to geico? i'd say happier than a camel on wednesday. hump day!!! yay!! get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. >> what is a simple strike on syria sounds more like a military mess. the president's plan keeps changing all this while a frightening plot by iran is uncovered. a live report from the middle east next. >> for a second time in a week the union leader richard trunka is attacking obama care. >>> a shocking on-line confession. >> on june 22nd, 20013 i killed vincent kenzani. >> wait until you hear what the self confessed killer is doing next. fox and friends first continues right now. >> good morning to you from new york city. hope you are off to a great day. it is friday morning. welcome to "fox & friends first". i am heather nauert. >> i am patti ann browne. -- it is 30 minutes after the hour. a senior defense official telling fox news b-52 bombers could be used in a strike on syria. the plan of a

ha ha ha ha ha ha! leslie, guess what today is? it's hump day. whoot whoot! ronny, how happy are folks who save hundreds of dollars switching to geico? i'd say happier than a camel on wednesday. hump day!!! yay!! get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. year old aaron alexis from wo t a navy yar >>> breaking news in washington, d.c. we just confirmed that 34-year-old erin alexis from fort worth, texas is the shooter. authorities still on the hunt for a second suspected gunman. 12 people died and several others were injured. the senate is shut down for the day. nearby schools are in lockdown. planes at reagan international airport have all been grounded. we'll be monitoring the developments all day. we'll have the very latest for you at 5:00 and of course at kpix.com. >>> she's dabbled in movies, music, now queen latifah's next adventure begins when she makes her debut of host of the talk show. guests include will smith, alex tribb beck. the show premieres right here at 2:00. >> i talked to her on friday. she's pretty pumpe

ha ha ha ha ha h leslie, guess what today is? it's hump day. whoot whoot! ronny, howappy are folks who save hundreds of dollars switching to geico? i'd say happier than a c camel n wednesday. huhump day!!! yay!! i'd say happier than a c camel n get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could saveve u fifteen percent or more. we run errands. we run to the grocery store. in fact, the average american drives fewer than 29 miles a day. the 100% electric nissan leaf goes two-and-a-half times that on a single charge. it's a car. it just doesn't take gas. [ farrar ] so think about where you go in a day. do you really need gas to get there? [ male announcer ] the 100% electric nissan leaf. nissan. innovation that excites. now get a 2013 nissan leaf for $199 a month. off the tuscany coast. tomo the wrecked cruise liner wie tilted upright in the large operation of it's kind ever atte >>> italian authorities given the final go ahead to pull the wrecked cruise liner. it will be tilled up right. it has been nearly two years since theship capsized killing 32 people, including

ha ha ha! thank you for bringing it in. thank you. on speaker: ladies and gentlemen, can i have your attention, please? welcome to leeds castle. we're having a lovely day here. i hope you're enjoying yourselves. it's a very special day today because our beloved henry sandon is--not today, 80-- but very soon going to be 80 years old, and also has been given an m.b.e. crowd: ooh. i know. so, we wanted to celebrate with a special rendition of happy birthday. so, promise me you're gonna join in. one, two, three. ♪ happy birthday to you ♪ happy birthday to you ♪ happy birthday, dear henry ♪ happy birthday to you a round of applause for henry! ( cheering ) ( laughter ) ( indistinct chatter ) recognize this? yes! ozzie the owl. we thought a little birthday cake in the shape of ozzie the owl might be appropriate. i say! that's marvelous! is it edible? it is. we're gonna have it in a minute. can i keep it? i'm sure you can. it is your birthday, after all, and a very important one. thank you very much. happy birthday, henry. oh, isn't that fanta

ha ha ha! that was funny. ok, just think about it, all right? so, have you brought the marriage license? oh. oh, yeah. i've got it right here. there you go. ok. [chuckles] "spooner." carrie spooner? we had a carrie spooner in camp one summer. what? the same camp doug went to? no. we didn't go to the same camp. you weren't that girl who was always startin' fights and moonin' truckers on route 9? yes! camp unity! i didn't know that that was a church camp. i guess that's why they didn't ask me back. you know, i actually remember your last day. i think you had a run-in with doug. shut up! you cheated at kickball, carrie. did not! did, too! shut up! no, you shut up. stop! no! you! get-- aah! oh! [coughing] oh...you're gross. [coughing] that was doug? you're telling me i fell on doug? yep. this is unbelievable! do you remember this? not really, but i got my armpit hair that summer, so i was pretty much wrapped up in me. do you know what this means? we met as kids. we met before and didn't even know it. it's like we were meant to be or something. well,

ha ha ha ha ha ha! leslie, guess what today is? it's hump day. whoot whoot! nny, how happy are folks who save hundreds of dollars switching to geico? i'd say happier than a camel on wednesday. hump day!!! yay!! get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. chihuly chihuly decaying bay area mansion i million >>> it housed uc presidents for decades but has been empty for years. tonight at 6:00 this mansion is on track for a renovation. but why it would cost six figures even before a single fix, that and much more tonight at 6:00. >> thank you for watching. the "cbs evening news with scott pelley" is next. >> the latest news and weather are always on kpix.com. captions by: caption colorado comments@captioncolorado.com >> pelley: tonight, easy money. the fed says it will hold down interest rates a while longer. stocks hit historic highs. but savers pay the price. anthony mason explains. the navy yard shooter carved a message into his gun, and his mother released a message of his own. >> to the families of the victims, i am so, so ve

ha ha ha ha ha h leslie, guess what today is? it's hump day. whoot whoot! y, howappy are folks who save hundreds of dollars switching to geico? i'd say happier than a c camel n wednesday. huhump day!!! yay!! i'd say happier than a c camel n get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could saveve u fifteen percent or more. some things won't last 25 years. ah! woof! some things will. the labor department says u employers added 169- thousa jobs in august. that's an improvement over july -- but fewer jobs were added than analysts expected. the unemployment fellto 7-point-3 percent -- lowest since december 2008.t of the hiring was in lower-paying service jobs. along with that: consumer spending, home building and home sales, all weakened in july. :35-:43 (sot: alan valdes, st. trader) "70% of them pl have been part timers, so t fact is we're hiring more pt time workers and the jobs they're getting are low wage jobs." the job market may be slow recover. recent figures show manufacturing and construction are picking up. housing remains a bright sp and consumers are stil

ha ha! you should pick that up. [girls laugh] oh, you're such a dork. loser. here. let me help you with that. oops! ha ha! uncer: every day, kids witness bullying. oh, look! your crush is looking at you. [girls laugh] poor you. ha ha! announcer: they want to help but don't know how. bully: see? no one here's gonna help you... announcer: teach your kids how to be more than a bystander. visit stopbullying.gov. >>> welcome back to "the young icons". >> my name is alana, i'm 14 years old and i'm a singer/soon writer/actress. >> as they say in the biz, alana is actually a triple threat. >> i got into singing and acting when i was about four years old on a cruise ship, and i did a talent show. that's when my parents realized i had a voice. oh, maybe this will be good for her. i got into some singing lessons, i was eight. as a 4-year-old, i was excited. all i can remember is twirling on stage, but i just remember i was really proud to be up on there and show everybody like what i could do. >> i like acting and singing, because i feel like those are some of the careers you can have where you're free to express you

ha-ha-ha! let's see that in slow motion. ha-ha-ha! that's -- might be the single greatest reaction ever recorded. well worth losing your job over.

>> ha ha! steve: you're in banking? >> no, sir. actually-- steve: work down at the gas station? >> no. steve: shut up. i ain't through. >> all right. steve: go ahead, what are you, kenneth? go ahead. >> i'm scared to talk now. steve: you don't understand. i've been doing this long enough. i know when i've been read to a family that really needs to be on tv. we got it right here, though! this is gonna be good. so what do you do, kenneth? >> actually i'm retired. i'm a disabled vet, and i do a lot of volunteer work for veterans, plus i'm the best-looking grandpa in texas. [cheering] [all yelling] >> promote yourself. steve: that's right, promote yourself! well, ok, kenneth, name--name something that would be creepy for a mother to still be doing for her 40-year-old son. >> cleaning up his room. steve: cin

ha! ha! - flyyyying! (chrissie laughing) - chrissie's flying knight is so funny.

ah ha ha ha ha! [music plays] you ready to get serious? 'cause this is gonna get serious. doh-ohh! i coulda been somebody. dad! i got him on the ropes. does he not look gassed? come on, bring, it gumby! foul! you got knocked out by a girl! "the crazy ones" takes place in the world of advertising, but it's really about a father, played by robin williams, and a daughter, played by sarah michelle gellar. i play simon roberts, who's part of the ad agency roberts & roberts in chicago. welcome, fun mcdonald. well, it looks like somebody had an unhappy meal. simon, i have something difficult to say. is it "rubber baby buggy bumpers"? i struggle with that one. we're fired. authenticity, real relationships-- that's the rumor. zach sleeps around. he hears things. he may have even slept with somebody here in this room. i propose we redo that 1972 spot and upgrade the images. combine that with the right voice. someone incredible. someone famous. someone gettable? get me that voice. by tomorrow. perfect. even better. sydney is sort of the yin to her father's yang. she's definitely a type "a" per

ha ha ha ha ha ha! leslie, guess what today is? it's hump day. whoot whoot! are folks who save hundreds of dollars switching to geico? i'd say happier than a camel on wednesday. hump day!!! yay!! get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. . >>> let's take a moment to review the time line on the syria crisis, from the president's own words "red line." to now. >> we have been very clear to the assad regime, but also to other players on the ground that a red line for us is we start seeing a whole bunch of chemical weapons being moved around or utilized. when i said the use of chemical weapons would be a game changer, that was not a position unique to the united states. and it shouldn't have been a surprise. >> well, some have tried to suggest that the debate we're having today is about president obama's red line. this debate is about the world's red line. it is about humanity's red line. >> i didn't set a red line. the world set a red line. >> my friends, it matters here if nothing is done. it matters if the world speaks out in

ha ha ha! >> mr. brown. >> he look like that dog next door. ha ha ha! >> wow, isn't this great? an, no yelling, no fighting. just us having a great time. ha ha! >> yep. way better than watching the game. >> i'm surprised to see you here, renee. i was beginning to think you weren't interested. >> why do you say that? >> 'cause your text said "not interested." >> oh, that was before i realized what a great guy you are, rudy. >> i-it's ray. >> that's what i said, randy. >> i don't know if i ever mentioned that ray owns several tackle shops. >> several times. >> several tackle shops. >> i just opened my 15th store in macon. >> 15th? >> yeah. >> wow. >> what about you, renee? how long have you been nursing? >> well, my youngest son is 4, and so i'm trying to wean him, and i used to be a size "c," but now i'm a "b". uh-oh. you're talking about how long have i worked as a nurse? >> yeah. >> five years. and how long you been fishing? >> he's not a fisherman, renee. he owns -- renee, what are you doing? >> hey, stop texting. >> oh, i'm sorry. i'm being rude. >> yes. >> um, so, rudy, you'r

it was an animatronics robot who went "ha ha ha ha" all day and scared generations of san franciscans out of their wits. it has a month-to-month lease at fisherman's wharf. >> they moved it to this temporary location at fisherman's wharf. they left an unusual little treasure of the city. >> ingleside terraces, again, i was trying to show off the residence park. a lot of crazy building. for still has one of the great stairways -- forest hill has one of the greats their ways. -- great stairways. this looked like a ship. they used to decorate fire houses for christmas. >> on the side of this fire house is a wooden tower. the tower was for drying the hoses. after they get water in them, they have to be dried. >> a fire house like this is for sale. if you have $1.3 million, which is really cheap enough for a firehouse -- >> one in the inner sunset was just sold. >> was it? i want to buy a streetcar. i cannot pay my rent. >> there were two of these for pumping water out of the ground. murphy gave a lot of money for it. >> what decided the boundaries and the location of golden gate park? >>

ha ha ha ha ha ha! leslie, guess what today is? it's hump day. whoot whoot! ronny, how happy are folks who save hundreds of dollars switching to geico? i'd say happier than a camel on wednesday. hump day!!! yay!! get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. and now, there's a plan that lets you experience that "new" phone thrill again and again. and again. can you close your new phone box? we're picking up some feedback. introducing verizon edge. the plan that lets you upgrade to a new verizon 4glte phone when you want to. having what you want on the network you rely on. that's powerful. verizon. upgrade to the new moto x by motorola with zero down payment. i get out a lot... except when it's too cold. like the last three weekends. asthma doesn't affect my job... you missed the meeting again last week! it doesn't affect mfamily. your coughing woke me up again. i wish you'd take me to the park. i don't use my rescue inhaler a lot... depends on what you mean by a lot. coping with asthma isn't controlling it. test your level of co

ha ha ha ha ha ha! leslie, guess what today is? it's hump day. whoot whoot!ollars switching to geico? i'd say happier than a camel on wednesday. hump day!!! yay!! get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. ♪ you'd expect this, an ancient city of nearly unparalleled size and beauty to be overrun with tourists, snack bars, tours on tape. but no. >> this is stunning. >> you'll encounter western travellers at bagan's travel sites for sure but they are a hearty bunch. even the bus tours here are not for the faint of heart or weak of spirit. but for the most part you are more likely to bump into a goat than a foreigner. >> this is so beautiful. so much like an ode to human believes and admiration and worshipping. >> slave labor. >> and slave labor. you build this many temps thousands of them in a short period of time. chances are someone was working for less than minimum wage, let's put it that way. >> oh, sure. you could fly here. look at that. >> a millennia ago in a period of 250 years, over 4,000 structures like this were buil

ha ha ha ha ha ha! leslie, guess what today is? it's hump day. whoot whoot! ny, how happy are folks who save hundreds of dollars switching to geico? i'd say happier than a camel on wednesday. hump day!!! yay!! get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. this is the creamy chicken corn chowder. i mean, look at it. so indulgent. did i tell you i am on the... [ both ] chicken pot pie diet! me too! [ male announcer ] so indulgent, you'll never believe they're light. 100-calorie progresso light soups. >>> welcome back to "early start." >>> russia is make ago new claim who was responsible for the deadly chemical weapons attack in syria. a u.n. report gives indications the assad regime may have been behind it but russia says that is wrong and it has evidence pointing the fingers at the rebels. phil black is live in moscow this morning. what is this new evidence, phil? >> reporter: we don't know the details. it's been given by the syrian government to the russian government. they say they are translating it from arabic and they are go

ha ha ha ha ha ha! leslie, guess what today is? it's hump day. whoot whoot!ny, how happy are folks who save hundreds of dollars switching to geico? i'd say happier than a camel on wednesday. hump day!!! yay!! get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. tennessee high school are g the extra mile: his reading, >>> if school is a place to exercise your mind, students in one tennessee high school are going the extra mile. you could call this reading, writing and arithmetic. students are using the so- called fit test. the more active the kids are in class, the more alert they will be. >> thought they were crazy at first, actually helped me concentrate on reading and it's improved my grades at all. >> the fit desk is rolling around other schools around the country. 10,000 were expected and about 1,000 schools next year. >> i love that idea. roberta and i want to try it. >> wear a helmet when you go to school now. >> see you tomorrow. have a good night. ,,,,,,,,,, (glass tinging) i'd like to propose a toast to my beautiful bride-to-