it is sexy liberal hal sparks. hump days with hal sparks. hal off to germany tonight.eptember. columbus in august. get it go. [ applause ] >> good times. >> get smacked in the chop for that. >> i bring them a bundt cake. mitt romell -- i mean mitt romney. >> stephanie: let's get to the happy clappy news in the wake of wisconsin. yesterday, the u.s. court of appeals declined to we are visit an appeal to a ruling that found prop 8, the california constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage unconstitutional. the decision clears the way for the case to head to the supreme court. [ ♪ "jeopardy" theme ♪ ] >> stephanie: jim, the case was called perry versus schwarzenegger. who did the perry refer to? >> linda perry. >> stephanie: no! [ buzzer ] >> steve perry. >> joe perry. >> stephanie: no! chris perry. >> jane's addiction. >> stephanie: chris perry who joins us now. >> good morning! >> stephanie: hang on, i'm conferencing you. here's your lovely and talented wife. hi, chris and sandy. how are you? i know we've had these talks several times. this is yet another big da

hump days with hal sparks. jacki, we feel bad. we can't bring a jingle every hour. feel like now i need to bring you a bottle of wine. >> we'll work on it. >> we're spitballing. >> it is like a brainstorm session. >> absolutely. >> stephanie: we've got two musicians in here. we'll just be doing a little scat intro. >> jacki! jacki schechner. all right. you know what? why don't we just get to the news. >> sorry. real news. >> stephanie: we're in a big prehealthcare ruling frenzy. jacki schechner is on it like a leopard. >> warming up my protractor and my compass my abacus. >> stephanie: here she is. >> we'll talk about healthcare reform. obviously tomorrow we'll get some sort of ruling from the supreme court. an abc news "washington post" poll out this morning asks people about both the affordable care act and the status quo and it is probably no surprise to you that both are unpopular. 39% of people don't like -- only 39% of people like the system the way it is. but here's what's tricky for any kind of reform. 75% of people say that they like the quality of care the

hal sparks is here. 1-800-steph-12 the phone number.spoke of earlier. john writes steph wow. the first thing that came to mind was flounder from animal house. [ applause ] >> stephanie: toothless and tea baggy is no way to go through life. >> stephanie: out here in hollywood, if we made a movie and cast him as a tea bagger, they would accuse us of stereotyping. i'm just saying. [ ding ding ] [ applause ] he's your guy. >> your spokesman. >> you go with that. >> stephanie: hi from asheville, north carolina. >> caller: hi, everybody. i'm calling as a native texan and the oldest person who listens to "the stephanie miller show". for the good name of farenthold because blake farenthold's step grandmother sissy farenthold ran for governor unsuccessfully in the early '70s in texas. she was in the u.s. congress and -- i'm sorry, she was in the -- she was a state representative. i'm sorry. ran for governor unsuccessfully and got -- was second in balloting for the vice presidential slot in 1972. >> wow. >> caller: now granted -- kind of a disast

and hal sparks will join us. but first, the reviews keep coming in on the supreme court's split decision on arizona's immigration law. you will be shocked to here that some very familiar figures on the right have worked themselves into a bit of a tizzy. justice antonin scalia claimed the obama administration opposed the law because it, quote, desperately wants to avoid upsetting foreign powers. i guess he means mexico -- and that the majority ofpinion boggles the mind. this from a guy who thinks jesus liked the death penalty. as for jan brewer, she told a local white house, the white house opposition was part of a plot to get illegal immigrants to cross into this country to vote to help reelect the president. >> they want chaos. they want a larger voting base as far as i am concerned and they want the illegal immigration to continue so the illegals can all do whatever they want and register to vote. it's illegal but they are not enforcing the law. so what's going to happen to them? he is looking for votes. >> jan

he's coming back from germany tomorrow. >> it might an bleary hal sparks. >> stephanie: a bleary hal

star lead singer of zero 1 and the a member of stephanie miller i give you hal sparks. ya. not the least of which the third pillar, yourself, jon fugelsang. >> thank you very much. >> from the world of twitter. if you look at that running group, portman probably fits that do no harm boring guy thing that they were running a little bit ago. he would be the winner of the jimmy carter look-alike contest. he looks a bit like the foil in any 1989 s&l sketch. >> cast portman. >> they can't get a shocker. they can't get somebody who is going to, you know overhad 0 him which could be anybody with any message or worth. and then they have got to go boring and expected. but if they go boring and expected, it's less of a win. i don't think we have actually seen the person. i don't think the person he is going to pick is on anybodyses list. i don't think they can be. >> the advantage of portman is he makes romney look like james brown but who do you think will then be his vp? >> i think it's. >> do you -- >> i think it's a nobody a next to nobody. it has to be something like line th

. >> join comedic geniuses hal sparks john fuglesang -- >> fox news is like a mecca for people who hates stephanie miller as they help columbus rediscover its funny bone. >> who's laughing now, huh? >> i'll tell you who's laughing now. we are. tickets are a available at ticketmaster.com. or by calling 800-745-3000. this is truly the show that will put the ooh and aah back in ohio. coming to the capital theatre on august 18th. buckeye state you're going to love our nuts. >> you're going to love my nuts. >> stephanie: yeah, thank you. oh also, the ginormous barn that the pan tages in los angeles, almost 2,000 people have bought tickets. almost gone for july. i would hurry and get it. [ applause ] guess what's happening today? >> what? >> stephanie: current tv crew is coming to my house to shoot stuff for the sexy liberal documentary. they're doing a documentary. you know what that means? >> the dogs will lick the lenses. >> stephanie: that could happen. but also, they're sending the smokin' hot hair and makeup call from current so you might want to stop by. say a hill -- say a little howd

hal sparks just got back from germany.ll in during hour three of the show today. >> stephanie: awesome. >> at the old nazi camp -- not camp. it is a place on the baltic sea talking about online. it looks like a barracks. they plan on making it this big vacation resort and it looks like hell. [ ding ding ] >> stephanie: that's the earliest nazi reference that jim ward has made. it is still a happy clappy day because ron won gaby giffords seat and a bunch of tea baggers went down. >> i get it. >> stephanie: first day it is a proud day in any 89-year-old republican's day when her daughter shows up with a hat that says beaver liquors hat. he moved right next to beaver lickers. >> nice beaver. >> thank you. >> i just had it done. >> they're in the liquor business for god's sake. >> rocky mountain mike mentioned he worked close to beaver liquors. just down the road from beaver liquors is the shop beaver divers because of the -- [ applause ] >> because so much diving goes on in colorado. >> stephanie: i only wear hats that are bl

. >> hal sparks tomorrow. >> actor steven weber joins us on thursday. [♪ magic wand ♪] >> dreamily, magicalriday after the show. >> really? this must be from 1999 when people actually wore steph we're in tuscanny until august. i heard you are going to be riding your bike through tuscanny. yes! since we're the official listeners from italy -- [ bell chimes ] [ applause ] >> we saw you with sexy liberal chicago this year. loved it. love you even more because you wear pashminas. >> we could do a movie together pashmina girls. >> we were doing a flashback in the show when that guy used to call with that fake accent. >> yeah. >> you were on two or three stations -- >> yeah. >> and that music is still a holdover from that caller. >> jim had very stringent rules when he was the phone screener -- >> yeah. >> oh, it's the guy that does the italian thing again. >> bonjour no! >> dick in dayton. and tommy from columbus who still calls. >> yes. [♪ "world news tonight" theme ♪] >> a jew-hating elmo in central park. you never know what you are going to run into in central park. you remember when i was wa

world famous pantages theatre will host our generation's greatest comedy trio with john fuglesang, hal sparksables theatre box office or by calling 1-800-steph-12. a portion of the evening's proceeds will be donated to the trevor project. that's the stephanie miller sexy liberal comedy tour, july 28th at the pantages theatre. the countdown to july 28th to the sexy liberal tour starts now! >> wow! >> get to see john fuglesang at the panty phages. >> stephanie: somebody mispronounceiated which is normally my job. speak of sexy liberals. because a lot of pictures up at sexy liberal facebook. one of all of us from behind. on panel. i saw it on the sexy liberal facebook. a lot of people are talking about the unfortunate pashmina incident in which i was photographed with cher wearing a wrinkled green pashmina. victoria writes, like you i'm almost 60. [ buzzer ] [ laughter ] >> stephanie: by-och. i'm not almost 60. >> caller: the stills on the machine but i'm sure many of your talented sexy liberal members could do something with that unfortunate pashmina and the otherwise lovely photo of you and ch

hal sparks sexy liberal comedy bit -- he tried to warn -- >> first he tried to say it was lsd, and i'm don't know that for sure. >> it might have been recreational bath salts. >> the victim is expected to live. despite losing 80% of his face including his nose and left eye. >> a woman in new jersey now thinks that is her father and she hasn't seen him in 40 years. so i can only hope this is the best period of his life and he will be back in touch with his family. >> should he choose nicolaus cage of john travolta's face? >> john. >> i just gave you an ounce of sincerity and you brought it right back -- >> now here is more goofball crap -- [ laughter ] >> the guy -- >> they were naked too. >> i wanted to finish the story with somebody who has had worse luck in romance that me. and that would be the woman married to the face-eating guy. jenny, she married him, eugene in 2005 -- >> how is her face? still intact? >> yeah. thank god. described him as a troubled moon. really? >> you don't say? >> hum. >> hum. >> what? >> she said i wouldn't say he had a mental problem. really? >> yeah. [ lau

. >> announcer: john fugelsang and hal sparks and welcome stephanie miller. >> i want you to meet a veryove you. >> stephanie: all right. sexy liberal fun facts. i'm exhausted just reading it. 28 markets played to date. seen by 30,000 people. highest grossing political tour ever. i'm just exhausted just reading all this. [ ding ding ] [applause] what the hell was i thinking. >> very successful. >> stephanie: exactly. >> the fault lies with the salad with the dressing being used on the salad. >> stephanie: thank you. >> that is a dateed reference to. >> stephanie: thanks to the suffering court i'll be flying on a new airline. >> announcer: on citizens united airlines we've flown to thousands of destinations all across america. it's all first class with no riff-raff. our flagship, the spirit of congress has 535 first class seats that we fill just the way we like. remember you can fly citizens united anonymously. citizens united airlines. we are dedicated to giving you the shaft that we think you deserve. come fly the unfriendly skies. >> stephanie: rocky mountain mike. hurray. [applause] 1