hal sparks. >> thank you.eeter and hop into the chat room today and we'll be running that at my website, hallsparks.com. >> you would think on a week where everybody is on vacation there wouldn't be that much to talk about but that's wrong. >> it's beautiful. they don't even know how to take the pause for a crap news cycle. it's the day before 4th of july. and then you have mitch mcconnell and john boehner, and mitt -- we'll talk about what mitt's advisor said -- >> we will. >> but just completely blowing it. >> yeah, it was like we had so much news last week that it's exploiting the tragic and preventable death of the border agent, which the republicans keep saying over and over again. we had health care ruling we had congress save student loans. >> right. >> turning out they can do something useful. >> and the highway bill. we're going to get to everything today. >> here is today's theme mr. sparks. there are three themes today. number 1 is of course you and i have a new tour launching this weekend. >> yes.

sparks. hal's all the station in chicago that carries steph. >> thank you. all right. any other warnings for us? >> if it was up to me, you would be on network. number 2 i have a little piece of advice for the romney campers. i think they should now run the line -- back and forth -- but the now line should now been mittens could not have possibly been responsible for the shenanigans at bain because if you look at how he has just fumble bleeped this thing, how could he possibly have orchestrated all that stuff at bain. >> again sometimes all you have to do is turn the evil people loose. look at what he is supposed to be thinking. look at bringing in people like john bolton. that's the kind of guy he is. pretend you are friend of the world, but hire everybody that would carve the world up into chunk. >> here is the london mayor. >> there is a guy -- there is a guy named mitt romney who wants to know whether we're ready. are we ready? are we ready? [ cheers ] >> here is a random london resident. >>

it is hump day with hal sparks.tickets available for next big celebrity tickets available for next saturday's show at the pantages. >> oh! celebrity tickets? >> stephanie: long story. >> additions. >> stephanie: two giant celebrities on panel. celebrity surprises on the panel. >> can we say who they are? >> stephanie: no. because celebrities are skittish. they're very skittish. >> like poodles on linoleum. >> yeah or bambi on ice. and i mean the actual frozen water not crystal. >> stephanie: important not to scare them away. also a giant celebrity was supposed to go to sexy liberal and can't so we're going to auction off -- >> their tickets. >> stephanie: tickets for charity. >> we're not talking about bill handel's sensei who will be there. >> stephanie: that's right. >> i think there will be quite a few celebrities scattered around the audience. >> stephanie: it is all the rage and the tickets are almost gone. i would go. >> announcer: in a world where everyone is going gaga for sexy liberal laughs, one tour is cr

hal sparks for the full three hours.being the smartest and sexiest audience in radio. i mean that. thanks to stephanie we love ya, we miss ya. we'll see you tomorrow, kids.

we've replaced hal sparks. >> i'm disoriented. ♪ music ♪ ] [ singing ] >> what is this unholial keyholy alchemy. >> stephanie: we're doing a switch-a-roo. freaky friday. hal is throwing out the first pitch at the baseball game. >> did you feel that steph. >> stephanie: i did not but he caught himself shaving. >> it's a 3.8 center at marina del rey. >> stephanie: you would think i will notice if my bed moved. you know what i'm saying? the cob webs move. >> it's been awhile. >> stephanie: but i was partying with al gore last night. >> i got there right after you left. i came straight from the airport and everyone left. you left, al left, it was me and cenk uygur's two-year-old. u. you are so gullible. >> no, he might be in different circles now. i don't get invited to these things. >> i'm gullible? >> stephanie: really? how did i get gullible. >> al gore showed up at the current tv show party. >> stephanie: he's handsome and romantic. >> did he do that? >> stephanie: tell him to dial it down. he's exactly what you think he would be.

hal sparks tomorrow. jacki, courtney, everybody in the current news room good-bye everybody.

. >> in the absence of genuine leadership -- [ explosion ] >> hal sparks tried to get in spinal tap.cess pride. >> stephanie: how did we get here where we can't talk about gun control. that's where i was saying i want my andrew sheppard moment. i'm andrew sheppard and i am -- you know what i'm talking about it. >> i do. >> stephanie: we ended up blaming the true source of the problem, lily tomlin and her gory, violent films she's so well-known for. >> 9:00 to 5:00, the director's cut. >> outrageous fortune. >> stephanie: there is a scene edited out of "all of me" that is really wow! >> a part where she actually splits in two. >> stephanie: lily tomlin splits him in two with an ax. 29 minutes after the hour. i get to see the cutting room floor, literally cutting room. right back on "the stephanie miller show." [ music ] >> this court has proven to be the knowing, delighted accomplice in the billionaires' purchase of our nation. >> and you think it doesn't affect you? think again. if you have copd like i do you know how hard it can be to breathe and what that feels like. copd includes

a cat named paul. [ laughter ] >> remember hal sparks's friend named her pomeranian barbara walters. t hal had to run through the neighborhood going barbara walters bad girl! get over here. >> of course the dog has no problem saying woof. let's dive into the right-wing world. [♪ circus music ♪] >> brett hume -- >> they -- they -- they -- >> right. because we're trying to be helpers, i think his nuanceation problems are because of the sharpay-like folds. and we made two suggestions a clothes pen in the back or a shower cap, our neighbors have a bassett hound, and they put a shower cap on him when they take him for a walk so his ears don't drag. >> they play a huge share of the taxes. way disproportionate for the size of the income they receive, but it's not going to be enough of this president who almost has an attitude bordering on contempt of successful businessmen. >> yeah, because successful businessmen -- >> jeffery is not a part of the obama administration. >> no, or what do you call it warren buffet -- >> he hates the president. >> okay. >> he throws that crap out there with abs

featuring john fugelsang, hal sparks, and a favorite of pike place market stephanie miller. >> her branderal comedy tour. seattle, washington this is our final chance before the 2011 election to experience pure progressive progressive progressive nirvana. >> we were talking to eric holder about it's 30,000 gun deaths a year in the united states. and he said that just isn't covered -- so some right-wing calling called in and said how were in home invasions. >> really? >> most of those were just bad guys that were killed legitimately. don says steph one of your callers seemed to indicate all of the 30,000 gun deaths were justified. the cdc had some numbers on that. [♪ "world news tonight" theme ♪] >> total gun deaths, suicide 18,735. homicide legal intervek shun 333. >> almost all of them. >> yeah 300 out of the 30,000. undetermined 232. >> that's really disturbing that suicide is that high. >> i know. and of course they go oh they would just find another way if they didn't have a gun. >> yeah. it's a lot easier to deal with a gun than anything else. >> right. and whether it's a combinatio

hal sparks is a very sexy man. >> you know, i'm getting confused i don't know who to obsess over moremit to one person to be creepy around. [ laughter ] >> i would say stock aisha tyler, she is the hottest of all of us. >> she really is. >> we had a show with her in boston last year. did you get to see any of the aisha tyler show. >> yes, i went to detroit. and i had the sheer pleasure of hearing aretha franklin giggle like a schoolgirl. >> yes it was just incorrodable. >> it was amazing. >> all right. i'm thrilled. we'll look for you tonight. >> i positively adore you guys you are keeping me sane. >> oh that means so much. stephanie miller has the sexiest audience members. in the comedy tour i play the role of tour. and our album is for sale on itunes and amazon. check that out. lots more to come right after the break on the "stephanie miller show." ♪ >>we talk a lot about the influence of money in politics. it is the defining issue of this era. the candidate with the most money, does win. this is a national crisis. very, very excited about that and very proud of that. >>beltway poli

hal: your on the am." calling all cougars.... the billboard turning heads in hollywood... and the reason some find it offensive. 3 it's... a... best seller.../ but... the racy... "50 shades of grey"... trilogy.../ is... sparkingel... were... set on fire... at.. .a... book burning... in cleveland.../.there's... been plenty... of controversy... over... the novels..../ which... tell the story ... of... a... 27-year old billionaire... and.. .a... college student..../ two... radio... d--j's... hosted... the book burning...//// and... dozens of people... showed up ... to... see the books.... go up in flames. &pthis is giving voice to the people who think it's a piece of garbage. --butted to-- men can't live up to this book, and it becomes an issue. they're more interested in this, and go to bed alone. 3 the... "fifty shades" books ... sold... over 20 million copies in the u-s alone. a... billboard in hollywood... is... turning . heads. it's... an... ad... promoting ...a dating service... for... older women... who... like dating... younger men .../ or... cougars.../. seems... innocent,.../ but... some people ...think... the billboard's... language... is... offensive.../. it... reads ... "cougar life... dot com .../