spending nonprofit -- studying nonprofit management and my first woman lover was there at hebrew union college -- and i thought oh my god, the heavens opened. you mean talk about intersectionality, here were two permanent parts of myself that became integrated. >> and rabbi zalman? >> you know, it's a very similar and different story for me, being transgender, the trends community is one might -- one might say in broad strokes running similar experiences perhaps 30 or 40 years after gay and lesbian people so the kind of stories you were talking about the kinds of stories trans people now are experiencing right in this moment, so i get calls all the time simply because i am a transgender rabbi, i get calls and emails and postcards, people still send those apparently. people that her having the very experience you described that her growing up in a synagogue, thinking they are the only entrance jewish person in the world, they think they are the only jewish person who's ever experienced this and they are reaching out to talk to somebody, or perhaps they are really struggling because they perhaps