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mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers.t. [crunch] huh [laughing] looking good frank. looking good. i was just showing him. give me the spoon. kraft macaroni & cheese, you know you love it. what would you say is your favorite sonic hot dog? -forced you to pick one. -that's like asking a parent to pick between their favorite children. -pick one. okay. -chicago dog. 'cause it doesn't repeat everything i say right back to her mother. with six great flavors starting at $1.99, sonic is america's hot dog headquarters. (clicks) new lipton♪sparkling iced tea. refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles. for a taste that lifts you up. (cheers and applause) >> jon: welcome back, my guest tonight is comedian, star of epic louis. available of louis c.k. live in madison square garden. please welcome back to our program, louis c.k.! (cheers and applause) >> louis, louis, louis! >> i hear that a lot. i hear that a lot. (laughter) weird. >> jon: they're not booing, their shouting louis. although when it's me, they're actually bo

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mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers. if you dare. [bong] [ cheers and applause ] >> larry: okay. that's our show. i want to thank our panelists, lil rel howery, calise hawkins and brett gelman, good nightly, everyone! >> chris: it's 11:59 and 59 seconds. this happened on www.ashleymadison.com today! well, the cats are out of the bags; hackers finally published all the secret data they stole from ashley madison, the number one destination for cheating on your spouse outside of the hot tub at the italian presidential palace. laugh no one's really innocent here. cheating on your spouse is gross. so ( bleep ) you for that. running a web site that allows people to cheat on their spouses

mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers.ll three if you dare. [bong] who says families have to share data? these guys, that's who but at t-mobile you can get four lines with up to 10 gigs of 4g lte data, each no sharing and just $30 bucks a line 10 gigs for each and every one of you we'll even pay your family's switching fees up to $650 bucks per line so you can get 10 gigs for all, today and it's only from t-mobile early on, i noticed peoplealways serving our beer with lemons-- kinda like a traditional belgian wit. but we brewed blue moon belgian white with valencia orange peel for a subtle sweetness. that's when i got the idea for the orange garnish. so what i would do was bring bags of oranges to bars and show bartenders how to garnish our beer. people loved it. and when they realized it brought out the orange peel in the beer, they loved it even more. you could say the orange on top, brought it all together. >> larry: okay. that's our show. i want to thank our panelist. good nightly, everyone. >> chris: it's 11:59 and 59

mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers. from your airline credit card. flight using rewards miles but then the illusion begins. the flights you really want - surprise - they're not available because they cost a ridiculous number of miles. enough is enough... switch to the capital one venture card. with venture, you'll earn unlimited double miles. and using those miles is easy. just book any flight you want, on any airline. then use your miles to cover the cost. no blackout dates. what's in your wallet? tsometimes you want tos, roll with the tide, instead of getting pulled down. that's why miller lite keeps you afloat with the only 96 calorie pilsner. happy sailing. it's miller time. (cheers and applause) >> larry: welcome back. i'm here with my panel. "the nightly show" contributor mike yard. (cheers and applause) and our own "the nightly show" head writer robin thede. (cheers and applause) and his new special "crash test" is available on vimeo august 18th, comedian and actor paul scheer. (cheers and applause) okay. so we t

mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers. all three if you dare. [bong] hey nithanks. today. juicy fruit? sure i'll try a piec.... juicy fruit. so sweet you can't help but chew. ♪ >> larry: welcome back. there are times in people's lives when the odds are against them, the tide has turned, and they stand-alone, napoleon at waterloo, custer's last stand, cubs fans. and when that happens, i have to ask, so this is the hill you want to die on? ♪ ♪ >> larry: tonight's hill to die on, banning gay adoption. a federal lawsuit has just been filed challenging the last remaining adoption ban in the united states for same-sex couples. mississippi is the only state left in the nation that bans gay couples from adopting. >> that's right. mississippi. >> mississippi is the lone holdout against loving parents who happened to have two hoo-has or wee-wees. a now i am not saying that each parent has two hoo-has, you know, or wee-wees individually. i am not against how many hoo-has or wee-wees -- i think you guys know what i am saying here. all

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mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers.ry all three if you dare. [bong] ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: welcome back. though we live in challenging times, we are blessed. ( laughter ) every now and again a hero comes along-- not the one we want, or the one we need-- not even a hero, really. just some ( bleep ) guy. ( laughter ) usually from florida. >> shocking stunt pulled off by a man who flew his small gyrocopter to washington and then landed on the west lawn of the u.s. capitol. >> the pilot was this man, dow jones hughes, a postal worker from florida. >> apparently, literally flew in under the radar, literally. >> by the time he moves all the way into the real middle of it all here, he is one of the most protected pieces of air in this entire country. >> jon: what it's forget the gyrocopter. the real threat is cnn's giant tom forman. "give me a billion dollars or i will crush the city! rrrrrr!" so the key to this ( applause ) i like to swing my chair. the key to this harmless in no way interesting to actual terrorist s

mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers.f you dare. [bong] >> larry: welcome back. it's time for the segment we like to call "keep it 100." there we go. for all you people who don't know what that expression means, it means "keep it 100% real." all right? if you guys keep it 100% real you get -- we're going to throw some -- all right? judd, let's start with you. in honor yf your movie "trainwreck," congratulations, you had great weekend. >> thank you very much. (cheers and applause) very funny, amy schumer, who i imagine is the "trainwreck" in question. >> that's true. larry: here is your question. who is bigger trainwreck, amy schumer or lena dunham? >> ooh. that's a very good question. (laughter) i never even pondered to think that. >> larry: that's my job. (laughter) >> well, i don't know. production has rapped. the movie's out. schumer! (cheers and applause) >> larry: is he keeping it 100? (cheers and applause) good job. 50, who keeping on the trainwreck thing, who's a bigger trainwreck diddy or raul? (cheers and applaus

mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers. if you dare. [bong] ♪ turn up the summer with bacardi limon. try the all new bacardi tangerine. (cheers and applause) >> jon: welcome back. now tomorrow's final show is going to be incredible. i hope you tune into the final show, i think it will be incredible but i really think i would be doing a terrible disservice to my sev and the fans in signing off if i didn't bring attention to one of my feel rans, the five finger fillet, i stab around my finger was hurting myselfment i will start stabbing my fingers incredibly sharp blade and mi obviously prone to show related bloodee hand accidents so i am going to stab myself -- >> jon, jon, jon. >> oh thank god. thank you. thank you. >> jon, as your correspondent couldn't let you step down as host without taking one last gander. >> jon: that is touching, guys, i appreciate it. >> jon, to millions of people around the world you were a man on tv. >> hmm. >> from 11 p.m. until 11:30 p.m., monday through thursday. >> hmm. >> words, sound bites a

mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers.three if you dare. [bong] are=2 >> jon: welcome back. [crowd cheering] in the current version of our war in the middle east, there are a few things that we know. one, isis represents an existential threat to our nation. two, the massive threat requires no sacrifices on anybody's part because three we can take care of the problem with our strikes and trustee allies. one little snag. the iraqi army has collapsed. there is no real iraqi army. that's weird. i remember the united states spending eight years and $25 billion training somebody's army over there. does iraq have a twin brother, perhaps. the all right, the iraqi army won't be there to reap the strategic advantage of our high tech boom-boom juice. who needs an army when you have an army of coalition friends. >> the coalition. [laughter] >> crashed into what now. >> crashed into the coalition. the president talks today of key allies he's counting on to fight isis but are they willing to pull their weight. >> president obama is ther

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mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers. three if you dare. [bong] ed. >> jon: welcome back. you know, when it comes to presidential elections, nobody votes till iowa et slos. iowas have earned this position. (laughter) or not. al madrigal reports. >> with the 2016 presidential election a little more than a year away, can cats are getting their iowa on. showing their ready to be president by riding trackers, judging butter sculptures and joining incredibly nonthreatening motorcycle gangs. yet some think the state was .97% of our population shouldn't get this much attention. >> iowa should not be the first state to vote. iowa is unrepresentative of the u.s. it has fewer minorities. it has highly agricultural base where we are largely an urban and suburban country. >> iowa's concerns represents concerns of normal americans. what do i do with all this corn. i'm bored. where can i deep fry this. oh my god, i'm having cheses pains. >> most americans don't wake up in the morning and worry about whether or not they're going to deep

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mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers. all three if you dare. [bong] kids, juicy fyeah.gum with starburst flavors? (mmm...) (mmm...) (zipper noise) (zipper noise) (baby rattle shaking) juicy fruit so sweet you can't help but chew. don't think about wendy's spicy chicken. don't do it. problem is, not thinking about that spicy goodness makes you think about it even more. so think of something else. like countries in europe. france, austria, hung-a-ry. hungry for spicy chicken. see, there's no escaping it. pffft. who falls for this stuff? and don't forget, kids get hun-gar-y too. (cheers and applause) >> jon: welcome back. now tomorrow's final show is going to be incredible. i hope you tune into the final show, i think it will be incredible but i really think i would be doing a terrible disservice to my sev and the fans in signing off if i didn't bring attention to one of my feel rans, the five finger fillet, i stab around my finger was hurting myselfment i will start stabbing my fingers incredibly sharp blade and mi obviousl

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mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers.l three if you dare. [bong] we wanna see if you know wstrawberry?t. mango? i kind of taste carrot. let me show you what you are drinking. hahahah, wow. what if i told you there was four different vegetables in there too? it's still good! introducing, tropical green from tropicana farm stand! obviously healthy. surprisingly good. [ cheers and applause ] >> larry: welcome back. besides looking forward to what trump had to say in last thursday's debate there was one other issue i was forward to hearing the candidates discuss. >> governor walker, many in the black lives matter movement and beyond believe that overly aggressive police officers targeting young african-americans is the civil rights issue of our time. do you agree? >> i've got to say, it was really nice of the price is right graphics department to lend their talents to fox for the night. very nice. very thoughtful. but rejected plinko animation makes a good point, 8.5 million people is a lot of people. okay. i know this is goi

mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers. all three if you dare. [bong] we help you make all kinds of connections. connections you almost miss. and ones you never thought you'd make. we help connect where you are. to places you never thought you'd go. this, is why we travel. and why we continue to create new technology to connect you to the people and places that matter. >> jon: welcome back. as i wind down my time here, i leave this show knowing that most of the world's problems have been solved by us, the daily show. but sadly, there are still some dark corners that are bloom of justice has not reached yet. until now, jordan kleppers report. >> in today's "pc world" it seems like everyone is trying to be a bit more tolerant. but in one stubborn town in rural red state arkansas, discrimination is on the rise. worst of all, the local city council refuses to open their eyes to the town's bigotry. >> we do not discriminate in eureka springs. everybody is accepted for who they are. if you are a seven foot tall man and you want t

mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers.bong] who says families have to share data? these guys, that's who but at t-mobile you can get four lines with up to 10 gigs of 4g lte data, each no sharing and just $30 bucks a line 10 gigs for each and every one of you we'll even pay your family's switching fees up to $650 bucks per line so you can get 10gigs for all, today and it's only from t-mobile (cheers and applause) >> larry: welcome back. as you saw earlier in the show, members of the black lives matter movement confronted hillary clinton backstage in new hampshire last week. joining me now are two of the people you see in that video. so please welcome to the show daunasia yancey and julius jones. (cheers and applause) hey. welcome to the show. >> thank you. larry: that's responsive. so finally, we got black lives matter on the show. (laughter) i need to ask you guys, so people have talked a lot about your message of disruption. that's the word that's being used out there. i just want to know, why do you think it's so importa

mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers. too comfortable behind that desk. >> isn't that terrible? >> jimmy: are you talking to lorne? is there something i -- is there something you want to tell me? >> you weren't supposed to know about this. >> jimmy: oh my gosh. this is so embarrassing. lll >> no, no, no, no. >> jimmy: let's talk about -- >> you do such a great job. >> jimmy: thank you. >> really. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i mean, i'm just so psyched. i'm so happy you're here. let's talk about the record. the record's great. you have all the good songs. "it had to be you" with michael buble. of course i was available. "people" you do -- remake "people" with stevie wonder. >> oh yeah. he's incredible. he's a whole other way of looking at the song. [ applause ] >> jimmy: why would you -- why would you ever remake that or do that again? do you -- >> it's not remaking. it's trying to reinterpret something. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and it was never sung as a a duet. certainly no male singer has ever sung "people" or "the way

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mild chipotle, hot habanero, and fiery ghost pepper. taco bell's new $1 dare devil loaded grillers. try all three if you dare. [bong] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi, everybody. welcome back. one of the coolest things we can do here in new york city is to go see this magic show in a a private room at the nomad hotel. if you come to town, you have to try to get in and see this guy's act, it's really special. here to perform one of the tricks from that show, please welcome the magician, dan white, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ] dan white. as always -- >> thank you gentlemen. >> jimmy: thank you, welcome. dan what are we doing? i have no idea, i never want to know what we are doing. tell me what's up. >> we are going to play a game i used to play when i was a a kid. >> jimmy: okay, good. yeah, yeah, yeah. sure. >> okay? and the stakes, the prize is $10. >> jimmy: okay. >> okay. i'm going to give you this $10 bill, put it in your breast pocket. and we will get back to that later. put it in your breast pocket. >> jimmy: breast pocket. this is my breast pocket right he

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