cbs came to you and howard stringer after they decided to go with jay for the tonight show. can you look at that now and say that was for the best. >> yes, absolutely for the best. when i look at that now, i think it also reminded me of some of the worst behavior of my life, my own behavior. and i wish things were like they are now, i wish they were like they are now then. >> rose: what was the worst behavior. >> well, there was a lot of pressure, a lot of self-impressed-- imposed pressure. they came in and remodeled this place. which i have grown to love dearly. huge amounts of money. we had to fly around the country, talk to skeptical affiliates. and i didn't handle it well. and i wish i were able to handle if the way i handle things now. >> rose: but it was insecurity, anger. >> insecurity, anger, fear of failure. everything. >> all that's gone now. >> i would say it's all gone but it's in a manageable dose. i just feel like this is the way humans really ought to be. i mean i still lose my temper. and you're this close, charlie, i'm telling you, you are this close, you kn