i feel like i will live. to live a young cut i guess out than keep away from the club i. i. i. i. watch out for the tractor if it did you get any good garbage. live feed live here. on the old the. west sheriff cut that's sure if. you can tell us it isn't here. i've lived there stuff and there he is say yes i met a man i am i answered hi yeah but he didn't do you wanted dad to get out of jail do you miss him how much and i felt going to how much do you miss him because i'm not about to kiss him. and you kiss him big. i was their father and my eldest son is in jail when he was home he helped his father make a living and raised the kids almost that he rarely america made them mad it was summer now it's our on the old man's shoulders. all the people say you collaborates with israel but he sold learn to the jews now he's in the palestinian jail it's not easy. this isn't it shameful. let me say don't take sheriff when he needed money when i visited him i asked him why did he do it he said to school money not to betray my country i said that's the worst reason he said just for the money you're

i was live tweeting. and i said, jimmy's on tweeting too. >> jimmy: no, i was. i was tweeting 'cause i don't want to know, 'cause i want to watchet fired for a ridiculous thing. >> yeah. >> jimmy: i mean -- i was so mad because, as the show was going on, i go, "i think they're gonna get rid of dee." >> yeah, me too. >> jimmy: you felt that too? [ laughter ] no, because -- so, they had to come up with an idea for a thing that people want to take pictures of at universal studios. >> yes. >> jimmy: that was the job that you guys had to do. so, you're sitting around meeting with the -- idea table. and penn jillette, from "penn and teller," who's brilliant -- >> brilliant guy. >> jimmy: love that guy. he goes -- [ impersonates penn ] "why don't you have a floating head or something?" and i go, "that's great, but what does this have to do with" -- in my head. >> thank you! >> jimmy: what does it have to do with universal studios? >> thank you! a floating head. and everybody's wowed because penn jillettes going -- [ as penn ] "we're gonna have a floating head and the head will be" -- and i'm going, wait a minute, what does that have t

i did and i actually was not what i imagined i would be doing when i was in the army. my first impression about prison was this looks like a concentration camp i don't know who i should be watching when i should be doing i should be conducting myself i don't know how i made it there very overwhelming for a nineteen and going year old kid here. to be. in charge of weather summary of what's that and so. i would never. acts like i did i would read prison and normal life never ever in the way were using medicine there was to get at the prisoners and rake them down the side of treating people it was almost like we're punishing them for seeking treatment from us i mean when i'm ordered to give some a fourteen gauge needle. especially if they're not in a mass of trauma i know that that's not needed and i know that that's purely to inflict pain and that was explicitly explained to me by the officer in charge as give these guys fourteen gauge needle so they won't want to have these anymore because they're so huge and they're so painful. years of the prisoners are crying and wailing and screaming that you know in the us . there's nothing to feel good about stick in fourteen years have bee

i do not like cameras that catch me going through red lights. i do not like any of these cameras. i think it is the one thing people will say, i can't see it. i know i am being watched. i accept that. i think americans are going to resist the lockdown society you have in israel or northern ireland. america is a big country. people are going to say, you are not going to win. you would bankrupt the district of columbia. >> to say nothing of chevy chase village. i will get home a lot faster. >> i read something about the leadership this week. gotas interesting, obama so angry after the gun vote. i am not sure how that would have played. that wonderful speech he gave in boston. they paired very differently than the angry speech alone. >> the governor of massachusetts says massachusetts invented america. that may be news to people in virginia but you could forgive him. i want to come back to the boston story but the gun bill died in the u.s. senate. >> there were no coherent arguments as to why we would not do this. it came down to politics. the worry that vocal minority of gun owners would come after them in future elections. they worried the gun lobby would spend a lot

i feel like i live. live a young i doubt design keep away from the truck i. thank you i. think. i. watch out for the tractor live did you get any good garbage. lift feelin he. was in there with the. west sheriff cut that's sure if. he can tell us it isn't here that. they're stuck. there he is safe yes they met a man i am hey i said hi yeah did you davey do you want a dad to get out of jail do you miss him and how much and i felt going to how much do you miss him because i lost the bet you kiss him you and you kiss him big. i was their father and my eldest son is in jail when he was home he helped his father make a living and raise the kids almost that they rarely imac make them mad it was summer now it's our on the old man's shoulders. all the people say he collaborates with israel but he sold learn to the jews now he's in the palestinian jail it's not easy. it's shameful. lebanese say to take sheriff when he needed money when i visited him i asked him why did he do it he said to school money not to betray my country i said that's the worst reason he said just for the money you're poor s

i love. i was just -- i was on youtube, i was like, that was so -- i don't know so cool. anyways. please welcome in his first television appearance, stuart edge, everybody. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] i watched other videos. >> uh-huh. >> jimmy: do you know how to do magic tricks at all? >> apparently. >> jimmy: yeah. but you do other videos that are -- even bigger -- i mean, they're equally big. >> yeah, so i started out doing these kissing pranks. like the first one i did was the mistletoe kissing prank where i dropped a mistletoe in between people and see if they would kiss. then i upgraded from that and dropped spider-man in front of girls to see if they would kiss spider-man upside down. [ laughter ] and then we went to -- and then we went to a college and hung up "kiss me, i'm irish" signs around st. patrick's day. so -- >> jimmy: that was big one. yeah. >> yeah, that was another big one. so i've just been doing these tricks and then heard about this magic trick, and i was like, well, i like magic, but i don't know how to incorporate magic and kissing and i came up with this idea. >> jimmy: and it's -- it's so fun. here's the way it is. we have some volunteers from our audience today t

i can't figure out why morning joe thinks he is a republican besides wearing the blue blazer. >> i thought you liked him. >> i don't. i like the show. i watch "fox & friends." i go back and forth. i watch back and forth. i like the politics. i'm not sure why morning joe calls himself a republican he is not. he is a rhino. plicials are -- liberals are feeding a narrative state knows best cradle to grave. conservatives are feeding the narrative community knows best. what's at the center of the community? the family. you have a vast difference between the liberal msnbc and the conservative rest of us. >> dana? >> what? which part of that should i reply to. >> fabric. appropriate for networks to run this or for bob to have his phone on. >> if the collective had raised him correctly he would have known to turn off his phone at the table. >> one of her children. remember. >> i don't have children for a reason. i don't want to have children. because that would have been my responsibility. i don't think -- but in the life of julia, you can do whatever you want and you get to have the collective raise your children and take care of you when you are

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i look in the mirror, i look... "wow, i look like i did maybe even 15 or 20 years ago." i said, "jeez, i feel good!" >> seriously, it created your own little personal resurgence. >> absolutely. i really watchi put on my skin. when i read all the ingredients that was in resurgence i thought, this is the product for me. >> being a pharmacist, the r.x. stands for recipe, so my recipe of adding all of these things together and have the perfect blend that makes such a unique difference in everybody's skin. and you're like the poster child. you're the one that looks like-- >> joan: you are like the poster child. >> in just one night i noticed a difference. it makes you feel great. so i'd like to get it and have a whole bath in it. [laughte [cheering and applause >> joan: most of us would never leave the house without makeup let alone appear on national tv without even a drop of concealer. but this group of daring women did just that as they bared all for our cameras and for murad's state-of-the-art diagnostic equipment. it all took place at the murad inclusive health center, where the women had their skin analyzed and measured for wrinkles, skin texture and hydration before and after 30 days of

hoopla over the 50th anniversary. >> i remember this. 1981, i was in ninth grade. >> you were watching. >> not trying to be a macho man. i wasn't a soap guy. every girl was. i paid a little attention. >> it was good to know what was happening. coming up the most and least miserable places in the country to call home.

i watched jack abramoff. jack did not do this to me. i watched him and i started to, you know, i could hear empathy and i felt empathy for anybody who has done time. but beyond that, i just wondered where jack was going with his version of history. and i said, okay, i got the short end of that. so i sat there. and i said, i want to tell my end of it. i wanted to make it more than that is part of the story. but i get asked constantly about what happened. what on earth happened to you. this book tells a very complicated story. it is a complicated story so the perfect storm is we have put together how to help with this that i created in the crimes that are committed. also in the book, what is very important to me, it deals with iran and the opportunity that we have as a country to have a deal where ron recognized and would have had a deal and the white house information was sent. but they chose to ignore it. i think it is important for us as part of that. the other part is about a million times better. i thought with he was a very high-profile person and i met him in the finance ban

i did. and this is the thing. and you tell me, i don't know if this is illegal or not, but this is what i did. [ laughter ] i was there. i was watchingliams. and i'm watching it, and i see -- i'm on twitter. i see, hey, we're streaming the boston police scanner on u-stream. we're streaming it. so, i go, "huh, what is that?" i was hearing like -- [ imitates police scanner chatter ] "yeah, we're gonna check out the boat." i go -- my wife's like, "is this legal?" i go, "it's too late, honey!" [ laughter ] you're in this with me. we're together. i'm looking out the window. >> suddenly there's a knock at your door. >> jimmy: but there's a police scanner now on my phone talking, telling me as i'm watching the news, i'm knowing stuff before it's allowed to be talked about as news. because i don't know if this is real. if it was real, but i felt like i was one of the cops. and the fbi is talking to me going, "hrt does not want lights. shut the lights off. we don't need flood lights. they want to do this in the dark." i'm like, "what?!" i gotta tell brian williams! they're gonna do it in the dark! they're gonna do it in the dark! i gotta tell

i had to study on my own. i found review materials on mine and i sat down every night after i finished my homework instead of watching tv, i studied government. i remember all the governments of the cabinet. i forgot all them now. do not quiz me. [laughter] at first, i thought i was lucky, but i worked hard for it. it is not luck. it is how hard you work. >> who is the president of the united states? >> president obama. >> thank you. represent south dakota. be open to opportunities and try things even if your chances are slim or you are not good enough, because you are and anyone can be. i would encourage everyone to try their best and work hard and you never know what you can accomplish. you can be anything. >> thinking. -- thank you. >> i am from washington d.c. for instant gratification, and parts of europe even when things are not going away. -- and persevere even when things and not going your way. carrey yes man approach to everything. see what you enjoy. >> who is that? >> the actor. >> ok. just checking. island.from rhode one thing john kerry said to us, he relate to less a story, when benjamin franklin left after

i say, nancy? i wanna be with you, i wanna take naps with you. i wanna watch you watch a hockey game. ianna find long, red hairs in my overcooked pot roast. i love you-- i do love you. because you know that what i really am is a poor mama's boy from sadchester, massachusetts, who had to wear his sister's hand-me-down corduroys. - they were orange and had hearts for pockets. - and you like me anyway. - yeah, i get it, jack, but what are you gonna do about it? i can't share you with another woman, like you're that mormon guy on hbo,

i walked in, he was telling the clerks, you're great guys. i love you. i could tell he was intoxicated. >> girardo and eddie watch as weimer exits. >> when he walked out, i went to pay. ilerk, i said he's pretty intoxicated, isn't he? he said, yeah, you think? and i said, and he's going to drive that van out there with the little girl? he said, no, she's driving the van. i said, you got to be kidding me. >> it's not okay. she's the driver. believe it or not. >> i decided then i would stay and see what happened. >> girardot returns to his car keeping an eye on weimer and his daughter as weimer pumps his gas. even though the girl slides into the driver's seat, he still doesn't believe she'll actually stay there. either way, whether it's a drunk or underaged driver, he knows he'll have to call the police. >> i wanted to make sure nothing happened to the little girl. >> weimer finishes filling up, and then goes around to the passenger side. >> but sure as heck, she put it in gear and drove out on to the street. at that time i called 911. >> brownstown 911, what's your emergency? >> yes, i'm on west road, westbound, just watched a van pull out a citgo gas station. a 7-year-

and i can't believe i am going to say this but i am a loyal fan of "general hospital" and i didn't start watching it until a year ago. >> ihat. >> i know, i know, because now they're going by the way of -- i don't know what. they're disappearing, which makes me sad. i was watching another one which did disappear. they said they were going to bring it on the internet. they didn't. that made me sad. but "general hospital" still going strong. worries they are doing this much hoopla over the 50th anniversary. >> i remember this. 1981, i was in ninth grade. >> but you were watching. >> well, i mean, i was -- honestly, i'm not trying to be a macho man, i wasn't a soap guy, but every girl i knew was, so i paid a little attention. >> it was good to know what was happening. >>> coming up, the most and least miserable places in the country to call home. >>> sure sign of spring. major league baseball's opening day. i was watching. the highlights, high stakes, high salaries in america's number one pastime. you are watching "world news now." ♪ put me in coach ♪ i'm ready to play ♪ look at me i can be center field ♪ ♪ well i spent some

i went to india then and saw "60 minutes" over there. and when i saw it, i watched jack abramoff. i did this to mideast, period. -- myself, period. but i watched jack abramoff on that "60 minutes" and, you know, i could feel some of empathy. i feel empathy for anybody that's a done time. but beyond that, i just wondered where jack was going with his version of history. and then when i heard him say he owned 100 members and spent a million dollars, i said, wow, i got the short end of that stick, i guess. [laughter] he raised not too much for us. but i sat there in all seriousness, and i thought, you know, i want to tell my end of it. i wanted to make it more than that. he's part of the story, and i told the story of abramoff pause i get -- because i get asked constantly by constituents, what happened to you? what on earth happened to you? and this book tells the story. it's a complicated story where i have my part, and then there's some other parts to it. so the perfect storm is sort of a way i put together, you know, exactly the outside influences, too, that came into help with the idiocy that i created and the crimes that i committed.

i mean, i was a big arnold palmer fan, too. arnold is 10 years older than i am so i watched arnold play a lot of golf. you love watching a guy do those things. and then i got the chance to play with him. i was 18 years old first time i played with arnold. you know, arnold was just-- he was great for the game. arnold's career as a major championship golfer didn't last a long time. >> rose: five, six year. >> 58-64. he was very, very good at that point in time. that's when arnold really putted well. he really putted well. and arnold, the type of putter arnold was was the type of putter that probably wasn't going to last because arnold was a guy who did not fear a four-foot putt coming back. and so he's ramming that ball at the hole and ramming at the hole. and i'm going to tell you, you keep putting these all day long, they're going to get to you. and eventually, that's probably-- probably-- i can't say positively because i can't answer that question totally-- but it probably got to arnold because he stopped making the four-footers coming back and stopped getting aggressive going for first putt, and pretty soon he had to change the whole way he putted. >

i say this, he could say no. in my opinion the two side by side with a better way to do that. i went to india and then for one month trip. when i saw that i watched jack abramsoff, objected not do this to me. i did it to myself so i don't sit here saying jack abramoff made me. i made the decision but i watched him on 60 minutes, i could feel some empathy having been in prison. but beyond that i wondered where jack was going with his version of history. when i heard 100 members at $10 million, the short end of that stake is the money. but i sat there in all seriousness and thought i want to tell my end of this. i know the headlines but i wanted to make it more than that. that is part of the story and i told the story and i get asked constantly, don't you live in ohio, i am in the district, parts of the district and get asked all the time what happens? this book tells a very complicated story, not as easy as having dinner and here i go. it is a complicated story where i have my part and there are other parts, the perfect storm, where put together the outside influence to help with the idiocy i created. very important to me and i want to mention this, deals with iran and the opportunity we miss

watch. i must, if it's not good, i must give it back. i must see the watch. what do i have here? d. i don't see my child. only i can buy maybe nice watches. >> the officer brought it to him almost like a merchant. >> let's see the watch, shawn, show brian. >> how much did that watch cost? >> not so much. 320 euros, $500. >> he looked at it, showed it to us, packed it away and we resumed the interview. it was a very unusual experience. >> you bought a watch in prison? >> yes, you can buy everything here. >> how do you have so much money in prison? >> after the interview, schaeffer invited us inside his cell where he showed us a few of the many watches he has purchased in prison. >> this is a guess, you know guess, yeah? america, you know, huh? but i have at home, much watches, i don't allowed to bring to the prison, so i must always buy new watch that i want. >> not long after receiving his new watch, schaeffer's thoughts turn to corry, the woman he killed. >> i think of corry and that's very strange, never. never is a big word, but i only think of my dog, my cars, my house, my gir