believe me. >> i don't believe you. i don't believe you.ause truth is trump could save more than a billion dollars under his new plan. with that kind of cash, he can quit that dead end government job. one former congressional staffer put it best when he said this bill is not aimed at growth the middle class. it is at every turn carefully engineered to deliver a kiss to the donor class and judging by the bill, they didn't kiss them on the mouth. and. >> ugh! >> i speak of the but hole. and there are a lot of things jammed in that bill that don't have anything to do with taxes such as the lifting of a 1954 ban on political activism by churches. when you're at mass this christmas, expect to see jesus with a new look. we're all aware that yesterday matt lauer was fired from the "today" show for sexual misconduct is including exposing himself and giving colleagues sex toys as gifts. you do not want matt lauer as your secret santa but, no, right down the chimney. but there's one man, there is one man, don't boo me, i didn't do it. there was one m

thank you. i said if one side of us just can learn like to thank you for that doctors tell him that's. his mission that is it says i thought i said yeah that's a good go come to question the question i. hope i'm not it's fine the silence the ear of what i shall lose fended yeah and how much i say. yeah. yeah this is you i took a good c.e.o. of a few of these people and it was like this is taught to them because i'm wise and kind by shows off they can come they should leave it as my part of the trade their neck to see it's not the same ya know he said. yes i am a fire about it what. are the how to. run the phrase i was as hot as he gave me. a minority crush i used to run in love with a holder so i guess this is our game this me is that i love i'm forty perished i could have been deceived into a much mileage thing and i want my government to stop what are i think we're on the stage we're actually more relaxed than we are and quite often we just enjoy the music we just love singing together i love ou

i actually thought that god within to. thank you thank. you. oh oh oh oh. oh. i know. you know ok. close the load the los. lobos. the fish. fish fish. move. the float. float. not. will not. be gave a. little over. a load. that's what i asked that. i had now. this is so he sequel or not this initial. destination not my own and i know indeed some will see it see idealism was a finished these equal named yeah continue to snitch this is yeah yeah that's it. i thought steam. blew so. it's you have to tell p.c. tales and fought for the last attempt. you know so less is my doubts about and i will give us that leaving my son a lot i guess i just let's start i will if you're trying all the not to let his mind up about it be. countless. yeah i mean i think this i know. him how to finish sears and see below the whole melange color chappelle's sorn it's been a traditional and as if oily. talking and pokes fun of all. i've got that tell me when i saw it i saw it then when it came on for some label to fire god it is just as clover does as new forms from new york and buy it or not perish and then

have i ever told you that i like that in a man? >> yes, several times. now when will you need this? , >> i always need it. but as for this, a week from today will do. >> where you like it shipped? >> how about my place? i could meet you there tonight about 7:00. ,announcer: perhaps some of these dramatizations may strike you as just harmless fun. maybe you even said some of these things yourself, thinking they were perfectly innocent. and maybe they were. but that is one of the problems with sexual harassment. the difficulty in defining it. generally you can use two tests. --rst, ask your self yourself how would you feel if your behavior was described in a newspaper or to your family? and be honest. but because people have different backgrounds, personalities, and lifestyles, behavior that you don't consider improper may be considered improper by others. that is the reason for the next test. now, ask yourself if your behavior is welcome. if you find that people don't welcome your actions even though you may be showing genuine affection, you must not attempt to force them. unwelcome i

you know what? i dare you to kill 'em. you to kill 'em and then eat 'em." ( laughter ) we've got a great show for you tonight, elton john is here! ( cheers and applause ) but when we return, i sit down with former vice president joe biden! stick around, please! little rocket man! ( cheers and applause ) ( band playing ) when you ache and haven't you're not you. tylenol® pm relieves pain and helps you fall fast asleep and stay asleep. we give you a better night. you're a better you all day. tylenol®. resolution #1: binge more. join the un-carrier, and get four unlimited lines for only forty bucks each. plus, netflix for the whole family. on us. so, they get their shows... let's go, girl! you're gonna love this bit! and you get yours. watch however you want. on your phone, tablet, or tv. for just forty bucks per line. with no extra charges. let's rock this joint! all

what you and i started. ar me out. >> no, you're not going anywhere. marcus, come here, please. marcus, come here, please. >> listen, nobody's changing my mind, okay? >> you stay here, you will be running it. we've set everything up to succeed. >> i'm sure you will, pete. there's no question about it. >> listen to me. then if you decide in a year or two you don't want to be here-- >> doesn't matter. >> tony-- >> it doesn't matter. i want nothing more than this world for you to be successful. >> listen, listen-- >> no. >> so what's going on again? >> he wants to leave. he feels that--not to be here. >> why not, tony? >> i feel that, um, right now he has the right partner to help him get to the next level. >> well, he has the right financial partner, but i'm not here every day. >> i understand that. and, uh... >> have i ever asked you for anything? now i'm asking you. play this through. >> my decision is made. >> coming up... >> why'd you take my name off? >> i need to make sure that everybody that came here be

i do so much for you, and this is the thanks i get? if it makes you feel any better, i don't care. - wow. you just made a very powerful enemy, chuck. - who? jigsaw? not again. - hey, this has been so fun and normal, but maybe it's time you take grammy home now. - no, no, we can't go home yet. we're trying to find her a man. - what? no! why? - why not? this is her second chance at life and at love. look, i love pop-pop, but he wasn't grammy's mr. right. he was just her mr. right now. - for 70 years? - he's a slob! all he does is watch dog shows and criticize the dogs. they're the best dogs in the world. "you try it," i said. - mm-hm. that's why i'm setting up her tinder profile. okay, mom, what are you looking for in a man? - a big raccoon coat, a straw hat, and holding a little pennant that says "college." - okay, mom? mom? i have given up trying to find someone at age 30. what makes you think that grammy's going to find her dream man at 90? - you are so negative, like that mean psychic who said i was going to shrink down to the height

read that just like you larry. and i read the commissioner of the n.f.l. makes forty million dollars a year fifty now fifty over the contract ok. that seems mind boggling you know and the owners approve that correct right the only area billionaires you know employing millionaires yes right yes so in their mind i don't know i've got to say he's worth it would have to say that given his role what he's done both publicly and privately with all the issues the n.f.l. has faced they must they've given him a vote of confidence that it's that important to keep him in that position. jackie gleason once told me the great was a great mentor of mine nobody is overpaid if somebody thinks you're worth it exactly he was ahead of his time so i. think you were did you ever think at the height of your running major companies like you've run. a paid. listen i've i've had several go out of money i've been very lucky larry i'll be honest with you i had a very. modest upbringing and i was able to. you know how chief things that early in my ca

god i was thank you i was thank you i salute you little mom oh oh oh oh oh oh but they do not have all know about my mother god c.b. thank god because i live my life i wish that i was here and i still had she has this high fidelity so why not marry. well you know these are it's as if you want this to show me i'm right about it i knew i must have been. you know my p.j.s you know how that was i saw him get out of. i'm not he said. he was why did you apply here god letter thank you for the call of the two of us to call the two thousand and two list into my solo. ohp of zero zero zero zero zero zero zero. zero aka. oh paul oh oh oh oh oh oh thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you dr no thank you shane this is and that's why it's important to get i'm being oh yes you would you believe you're hired you could place your knowledge did i and scenes with us and the one you are looking stuff in your to out on visor that gets these off good and bad and then didn't before but i had to tell them if you knew this but odds are good a lot of you have you know it's not goin

<i>so, there you have it.> <i>there you have it.kes it a million? anyway, let's take a fond look back at the best of this week's "late show." well, it feels like christmas is here, courtesy of robert mueller coming down the chimney with a sack full of subpoenas. ( cheers and applause ) mr. president, i got you an early christmas gift, too. i just hope they're not too big on you. ( cheers and applause ) >> flynn could avoid jail time by participating in covert law enforcement activities, such as wearing a wire. "michael flynn, a very good guy, great listener. sometimes-- ( laughter ) sometimes he asks me to say things two or three times directly into his corsage. very so thought." >> there's so much sexual harassment happening over the past couple of centuries ( laughter ) just all these brand-new allegations from the beginning