what did you say about irving ramirez? >> i said he was a monster and that he deserved to die.m to burn in hell. i was so angry. i was full of rage and vengeance and i didn't know what to do other than just, i just wanted him to suffer as much as i was suffering. >> and yet you became involved in working with prisoners. why? >> well, after about four and a half years of feeling that way, i became so exhausted, i couldn't do it anymore. it takes a lot of energy to hate like that. and i wore myself out. i just couldn't do it anymore. and i needed a different path. and i was, a lot of things happened in between, but i was introduced to insight prison project and they invited me to go to a prison and share my story with people who committed murder and i thought, this is my chance. i'm going to tell them that all of the consequences of their actions and when i sat there with people who had caused this level of harm and then told them my story and they cried with me, they were, i could tell that there was something going on there that was so far beyond what i thought was possible. an