his name was jack rubinstein. e to jack ruby and shot lee harvey oswald. >> stephen: wait a second -- if the cubs had been a better team and given more business to jack rubinstein, we'd know who shot kennedy? >> we snow who shot kennedy. >> stephen: wake up! come on, george! you buy that single bullet theory? >> i do. >> stephen: we just got from wrigley field to the kennedy assassination. atthat's a "the colbert report" promise. >> the cubs won the cold war. >> stephen: if you can prove the cubs won the cold war, i'll personally endorse this book. right now. it could happen. >> in 1919 william wrigley bought catalina off southern california. the cubs began to train there. in '37 a des moines, iowa broadcaster known as dutch reagan decided he would cover spring training for his radio station. took a movie test with warner brothers, became an actor, became president of the united states and won the cold war. therefore, the cubs get credit for winning the cold war. (cheering) >> stephen: by that same logic, did not t