james k. polk. was very invested in people differing to her, but she was also willing to defer to men. and she also considered herself a lady, so i thought "lady first" was a good title. brian: what would you say about their relationship? prof. greenberg: james and sarah polk had about as close and positive of a relationship as any married couple could have. they were rarely separated. the reason sarah came to washington in the first place when james was a new congressman , and she was just 22 years old, was because they could not stand to be a part. they were newly married. the whole time they were married , they depended on each other far more than anybody else. she was james' closest confidant. he did not have a lot of male friends, but he and sarah were basically inseparable. have a lot ofhe male friends? onf. greenberg: depending who you talk to, there are different answers to that question. my reading of his character and all of his letters and studying his career over the past decade, i think