he doesn't know jane evans has a family. he doesn't care. he doesn't know if i have a family.he wants something. and he's going to take it. , i thought that was it, i really did. i am telling you, there are some of those days where it's once i got back into the watch the dirt or blood or whatever off me. how, i was heading for the bar. [laughs] [laughs] i'm shocked to discover you people been drinking alcohol. frankly i am shocked. >> we just thicket eric each other. if someone wasn't doing very well, or someone had a rough assignment. sometimes those humor, sometimes it was dark humor, sometimes those a night in the bar. back then, it certainly didn't have the knowledge of ptsd like we have today. we don't even know what ptsd was. all we knew is we lived through that. we survived another day. we are also each other's therapist, very often, you feel powerless to change things. i mean, we all did what we did, because we wanted to change things. we wanted to tell the world what was going on. we wanted to write some wrongs. >> this is a job that took up all your time. you could b