jason bateman is here.>> portions of jimmy kimmel live is brought to you by white rum. escape and we switched. e yay! i definitely like the ford better... it's that foot-activated liftgate... and i don't have to do all this... yeah, i'm filling up a lot less than i did with my honda... awesome! (laughs) now, make the switch to ford escape and get zero percent financing for sixty months see your local ford dealer today. ♪ music plays my tell 'em babe...how shemes doesn't solve the crimes. don't call babe ? we're not together. what? i have your lipstick all over my rim. look, this morning was great... it was, it was amazing, but it's over. over like, over...joyed? look i'm from new hampshire you're a beverage. sarah, i'm having a weird day. alright we're done. break up with lingering food. ding! this is such an us fight... it's such an us kind of fight. for that just brushed clean feeling... ♪eat, drink, chew orbit you're not doing anything as fast as you used to, which is funny, because i still do it better

jason bateman was correct.l stand by the fact that i'm pretty sure they didn't serve him bread on passover. he is correct. i am wrong. i'm such a schmuck. here it is your moment of zen. >> you are a terrible interview. >> you just want my attention. >> it doesn't matter how interesting i am. you signed up for ♪ chappelle's show, chappelle's show ♪ ♪ chappelle's show ♪ chappelle's show ♪ chappelle's show ♪ ow! ♪ whoo-hoo-hoo! ♪ whoo-hoo! ♪ yeah, yeah. [♪...] let's start the show. [♪...] [piano playing, general conversation...] what'll it be, guys? i'll have a scotch on the rocks. i'll have a samuel adams. i'll have a samuel jackson. you know something? i'll have a samuel jackson too. me three. [all laugh] three samuel jacksons coming right up. [rapid funk playing...] good mother[]ing choice, mother[]er!

jason bateman was correct.h i still stand by the fact that i'm pretty sure they didn't serve him bread on passover. he is correct. i am wrong. i'm such a schmuck. here it is your moment of zen. >> you are a terrible interview. >> you just want my attention. >> it doesn't matter how interesting i am. >> it doesn't matter how interesting i am. you signed up for ♪ two... two, three... ♪ ♪ hermes: listen up, people. as long as nothing happens for the next 15 minutes, our insurance will be reinstated. so let's just sit quietly and run out the clock. (screaming) a giant sausage! (yelling and overlapping chatter) oh, god, no! get out of here, you horrific sausage! wait. isn't today the parade? it's just a giant balloon! giant balloon?! (screaming) ♪ bender: see, buddy, it's not so scary.

jason bateman was correct. though i still stand by the fact that i'm pretty sure they didn't serve him bread on passover. he is correct. i am wrong. i'm such a schmuck. here it is your moment of zen. >> you are a terrible interview. >> you just want my attention. >> it doesn't matter how interesting i am. you signed up for >> stephen: tonight, a new trend hits college campuses, then immediately moves back home with its parents. then, what are today's employers looking for? a job. and my guest, ronan farrow, went from working for hillary clinton to hosting his own show on msnbcs, so he's still working for hillary clinton. ( cheers and applause ) the e.u. wants to ban american cheese makers from using the name "parmesan. of fine, then they can't use the name "whitz." this is the "colbert report." captioning sponsored by comedy central

jason bateman was correct. fact that i'm pretty sure they didn't serve him bread on passover. he is correct. i am wrong. i'm such a schmuck. here it is your moment of zen. >> you are a terrible interview. >> you just want my attention. >> it doesn't matter how interesting i am. you signed up for (cheers and applause) >> stephen: hey, welcome to the report. good to have you with us.

. >> right now on "jimmy kimmel live", actor jason bateman live", actor jason bateman vichlt a good night> from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- jason bateman. from "scandal", katie lowes. this week in unnecessary censorship. and music from john legend. with cleto and the cletones. and now, fare not, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you all for coming.

did you have fun working with jason bateman in the movie? >> i had lots of fun, yeah. he gave very specific directions. >> jimmy: he did. >> and he also made everybody feel so comfortable in the character. >> jimmy: did he tell you to say that? [ laughter ] >> no. no, he didn't. >> jimmy: you know, jason was an actor when he was your age, too. >> yeah. >> jimmy: did he tell you that? >> he did. as you said, he's a child actor himself. so he knew how i wanted to be treated and how i felt. >> jimmy: oh, that's nice. >> so he treated me like a professional. i really respect that. >> jimmy: you seem more professional than me. i don't blame him for treating you like a professional. [ laughter ] [ applause ] even your suit is nice. >> my dad takes responsibility. >> jimmy: your dad got your suit? >> yeah. >> jimmy: yeah. when you get the script, your parents i assume read the scripts before you get them. >> yes. they always do. but my -- when my parents got this, when my parents read the sides, they were like, who speaks to a kid like this? >> jimmy: yeah, right. >> so -- >>

. >> right now on "jimmy kimmel live", actor jason bateman live", actor jason bateman vichlt a good night

my guest tonight a young man named jason bateman.urned first time film director. he is quite tal entered. remember -- talented. but first remember in 2005 we found out the c.i.a. was authorized to use interrogation techniques on prisoners that could be described as torture. i did say could? i meant should have been described as torture but for some reason were not described that way

jason bateman was correct. i was incorrect though i still stand by the fact that i'm pretty sure they didn't serve him bread on passover. he is correct. i am wrong. i'm such a schmuck. here it is your moment of zen. >> you are a terrible interview. >> you just want my attention. >> it doesn't matter how interesting i am. you signed up for (cheers and applause) >> stephen: hey, welcome to the report. good to have you with us. thank you, ladies and gentlemen. >> stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! (cheers and applause) captioning sponsored by comedy central thank you so much. thank you so much, ladies and gentlemen, thank you for coming. with that kind of chanting, i feel, i feel no wall can stand before the colbert nation. i am joshua and they are my trumpets. (cheers and applause) folks, i like to have fun. i'm a fungi. just ask my staff, jimmy m i fun. >> yes, sir, you're very fun. >> stephen: damn straight. but even a fungi like me knows there's a time and a place

it's jason bateman's directorial debut. it's played a couple festivals and it's expanding now. it's going to expand even further next week. he plays a 40 year old guy who's entering the children's spelling bees that we see on television. >>this is not for kids. >>it is not. it is absolutely for adults. he has a very foul mouth throughout the movie he's swearing at children. he's playing psychological warfare with children. it's a very funny movie especially the first two-thirds of it. the last third is sort of weak and predictable but the first two-thirds are really funny. so adults go see the muppets with your kids and then leave the kids at home and go see bad words. >>no matter what you say about divergent you still think it is going to be the number 1 this weekend. >>yeah unfortunately it will be. i don't think it's going to hold on. it doesn't have the strength that the hunger games has. so i think it's going to die out very quickly especially with noah and captain america opening in the next couple of weeks. >>and that's the carry over audience so you think word of mouth

my guest tonight a young man named jason bateman.r. he is quite tal entered. remember -- talented. but first remember in 2005 we found out the c.i.a. was authorized to use interrogation techniques on prisoners that could be descr

. >>> the "wheel of fortune" champ is back and he's showing off his word skills against actor jason bateman on the "ellen" show today. >> garbage can lid. >> she got a little help, didn't she? ellen degeneres invited the daly city man after this amazing win went viral when you solved the puzzle on "wheel of fortune's" bonus round. new baby buggy. the san francisco nursing student won a total of $64,000 during the game. ellen surprised him today by giving him a baby buggy, of course, and a brand new 50-inch tv. he can put all his cash in that baby buggy. >> he was having a good time. >> there was a baby inside and he was like, what? >> thanks for joining us here at 5:00. brian williams is next. >> we'll see you at 6:00. >>> on our broadcast tonight, lost at sea, devastating news for the families of flight 370. a heart-wrenching announcement about what happened to their loved ones. >>> without warning, now more than 100 on the list of those unaccounted for in washington state where there is real concern about a risi death toll after that massive mudslide. >>> oil disaster. the race to contain

. >> now she can be seen in the movie with jason bateman called "bad words" trying to find out why a spelling bee. >> it is weird. take a look. >> not now, please. >> guy, i need to work. >> no. >> why at the age of 40 have you decided to annoy educators, parents and children by forcing your way into a kid's spelling bee? >> can't you see i'm trying to sleep? >> guy, i get one answer per tournament. i have three very paltry answers. it is time for my fourth. >> welcome. >> i'm so happy to be here. >> we feel like we know you and yet we don't. >> i know. we're total strangers. but it is fantastic to drink with you early in the morning. >> we don't usually do it unless the guests insist. >> we have to. >> we can't be rude. >> cheers. >> cheers. >> like tuesday. >> we call it booze day tuesday. >> i don't, but hoda does. okay. >> so you just keep working and working and working and yet in a sense you get the best of both worlds because you can have an anonymous life too. you never look like you in the movies. we didn't know that was you. so beautiful in person, but they always take you

and on thursday jason bateman will be here, from "scandal" katie lowes, and music from john legend.t tonight was born in america, raised in australia and then, like a boomerang, she came twirling right back at us. she's the academy award-winning star of many memorable films. her newest is called "the railway man." it opens april 11th. please welcome nicole kidman. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you for coming. you look very beautiful. the last time you were here, i was tied up. matt damon tied me up. and you made probably the greatest entrance any guest has ever made in the 11 years of this show. i mean, that was really something. >> i'm not doing that tonight. well, you never know. >> jimmy: we'll see what happens. do we have that tape? let's examine this. >> oh, no. that's you. and then the guy on the share, that's me. and then >> oh, my god! [ applause ] >> get that off! it was so not that long. >> jimmy: those were the three most magical seconds of my life. where did you learn to do that? i mean, that was -- >> i've had many lives. >> jimmy: let's go back to which ever

tomorrow night -- jason bateman will be here. from "scandal," katie loews will be with us.ll have music from john legend. our first guest is the only actress in history to receive emmys for roles on three different comedy shows. tonight, right here, she goes for number four. watch the season premiere of her exceptionally funny show "veep" a week from sunday on hbo. please welcome julia louis-dreyfus. [ applause ] >> jimmy: are those prescription glasses? >> they are. i seem to have lost my eyesight. >> jimmy: have you really? they're stylish, they look good. >> are they? >> jimmy: yeah. >> yeah, i really need these now. i do. and today, getting ready to come here, i'm looking in the mirror, and i found a gray eyebrow hair. >> jimmy: really? >> who knew your eyebrows grayed. i didn't know that. >> jimmy: is that a thing, really? >> can you see it? >> jimmy: it doesn't look gray to me. >> it's gray. take my word for it. >> jimmy: you didn't pluck it. >> no, because that's the road to ruin. they're all going to gray and isle be eyebrowless. >> jimmy: nothing worse than being e

the saving grace is that while and for something completely irreverent, theres jason batemans directorialdebut , 'bad words.' in it, hes a 40-something guy who finds a loophole in the rules to a national spelling bee and enters for reasons that are explained later in the film. if you like irreverent, 'bad words' starts off funny and inappropriate...but after a while, the one-joke-pony just gets tiresome and be something its not. its a deans list 'b minus.' while i didn't watch 'veronica mars" when it was a tv show, i know it's fans are loyal. they'll be thrilled with the big screen redux of the beautiful, witty detective. it's a delist see. >> week 51 today. increasing clouds. snow tonight into sunday. a special north of the city 26 on sunday. >> coming up, a police officer killed following a police chase ended near the dam ryan. details ended near the dam ryan. details on >>i don't have to listen to you! i wish you were dead! >> don't you ever talk to me like that! >> if you're the mother of a child with behavior problems, i'd like to talk to you. my name is janet lehman, and i'm a behav

since then, the script's been snatched up by jason bateman and would go on to become his feature directorial

she stars alongside jason bateman in the new film "bad words" in select theaters now and opening nationwidege of 40 -- >> come on. >> have you decided to annoy educators, parents, and children by forcing your way into a kids' spelling bee? >> don't you see i'm trying to sleep. >> guy, i get at least one answer for tournament. i have three very paltry answers. it's time for my fourth. >> seth: please welcome my good friend, kathryn hahn. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> seth: welcome! >> i'm so happy to be here. >> seth: thank you. it's so exciting to have you here. >> oh, i can't believe this. >> seth: i can't believe this either. >> go wild cats. [ cheers ] >> seth: we went -- >> yes! really? >> seth: you -- i hope you know it's wildcats. >> yeah, really. >> seth: we went to northwestern. >> mm-hmm. >> seth: at the same time. >> well, i was significantly younger than you. >> seth: yes. you were significantly -- [ laughter ] we were there at the same time but you were significantly younger. >> yes, yes. significantly >> seth: you were the doogey houser of northwestern. >> i was a prodigy. exact

we've got steve harvey and jason bateman.of minutes. >>> then on trending, has your smartphone turned you into a distracted parent? we'll check into that. >> and the humorous campaign being launched in colorado tackled a serious issue of stoned driving right after this. someone bathed in handsome... oikos man. once you go greek... it's on the house. i'll pay you back reeeeal soon. grrrrrrrrrr. works every time. and stamos is right on schedule. she is so gonna own him. (both) hahahaha. all aboard the stamos train. wow wooow! dannon oikos greek yogurt, fuel your pleasure. are you guys enjoying this? very much so. we get to the end of the day and i am toast. in fact, we've had toast for dinner. but tonight i nailed it. kfc family feast. 9 pieces any recipe, 3 large sides, 6 biscuits, $19.99. do not give up on dinner. ♪ the instant you wear it, you own it. the instantly slimming dress, exclusively at white house black market. into these starburst minis? they built a factory in miniminneapolis. they're experts at shrinking regular

starring and directed by jason bateman, this is the story of a man who finds a loophole that allows hima favorite , since his arrested development. here he plays against type, going from nice to very naughty, cruel and sarcastic. he finds kids he can bully, has a very foul mouth, and engages in ethnic steriotypes. some good comic performances by allison janney and young rohand chand. this is where subjective humor comes in. some will love the gasp snarky comedy.i was good offended and disgusted. not for children. of any age. >> it made me laugh out loud. >> if you can handle this, i think you would be okay. >> here are some full screen for you to watch. frozen, american hustle, saving mr. banks, the book thief, 12 years a slave these all on dvd,. >> on the big screen,the monuments men, lone survivor, labor day, the wolf of wall street, the grand budapest hotel >> i want to tell you about a few books that came out. this one,dear carry. you what they been married to him as glamorous but not so much. he was a big believer office lsd. it is a big part of that where he tried to have her take