. >> and next to me, comedian jim norton. his special, american do general rete is -- degenerate is available at jim norton.com. >> a block. the lede. that's the first story. >> we start tonight with an international news. russia took crimea, and it also gained control of ukraine's combat dolphins. this is a real story. the sea mammals were being trained to defend against enemy divers and go on attack missions. they were planning to outfit their heads with knives and pistols and other weapons. they are on the cutting edge of defense. meanwhile, belgium has trained animals to patrol their waters. >> afraid to get her hind end wet. >> first of all what was that? crimea sounds like a name a drug dealer would name his daughter. >> it sounds like a soccer team. you do my job reading the international news and it sounds like a soccer team. >> it looks like crime with an a on it. we care no i -- now that the dolphins are involved. >> nothing says military defeat -- if you are a country and your military victory hippings on dolphins,

your ticket to a better night's sleep ♪ next "red eye" return appearances from harris falkner and jim nortonst story. that's the last story. >> no cold play song will ever sound the same again. that's a good thing actually. gwenyth paltrow and her wife chris martin have separated. the actress and cold play front man announced their, quote, conscious uncoupling after 10 years of marriage. the last included rumors of infidelity and visible distance between the two. they released this joint statement to their devastated public. while we love each other very much we will remain separate. we are and always will be a family. in many ways we are closer than we have ever been. that's a load of crap. turns out there was trouble in paradise and not even a scientist could turn back the clocks and fix them. kennedy, are you as devastated as i am? here is a hint, you couldn't possibly be. >> i am not surprised, but it is sad. they are the parents of children and for them it is a sad, sad thing. you really hope for the best when you see these ideal couples, but man the va a nity fair rumors alone were eno

jim norton, mcdowell, a bunch of other people because there are like two guests on every show in five shows so 10 guests next week. tune in and you will see all 10 of the guests if you watch all five shows. hope you do. >> what if you only watch three? your hepatitis c.forget it's slow moving, you tell yourself. i have time. after all there may be no symptoms for years. no wonder you try to push it to the back of your mind and forget it. but here's something you shouldn't forget. hepatitis c is a serious disease. if left untreated, it could lead to liver damage and potentially even liver cancer. if you are one of the millions of people with hepatitis c, you haven't been forgotten. there's never been a better time to rethink your hep c. because people like you may benefit from scientific advances. advances that could help you move on from hep c. now is the time to rethink hep c and talk to your doctor. visit hepchope.com to find out about treatment options. and register for a personalized guide to help you prepare for a conversation with your doctor. >> a lot of wasted time. very inter