we're here with jimmy kimmel. jimmy kimmel. pasta sauce contest. >> i spent the whole day working on this. >> stephen: as did i. and please, we're about to present our pasta sauces right now. please welcome our celebrity judge, james baby doll dixon. ( cheers and applause ) there you go. >> baby! baby, sit right down there. >> oh, my goodness! >> stephen: sit down. >> can i unbutton my jacket. >> stephen: i have to say you smell fantastic. >> how do i smem? >> very cologney. you have to make a decision here. it can't be a tie. i know we're both your clients. i know stephen makes a lot more money i do but i don't want that to play into this. judge it on the food alone. >> stephen: or which one you love more. okay, now-- >> may i? may i? >> stephen: napkin in your lap. you're not an animal. let's start. i'll get started here. today i have prepared for you a-- >> that's beautiful. >> that looks fantastic. >> that does look beautiful. >> stephen: this is beef and pan cheta. >> stephencheta. >> did you make the pasta yourself. did y

-- it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- matt damon. dr. phil mcgraw. from "quantico," priyanka chopra. and music from fidlar. with cleto and the cletones. and now, all aboard, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi, everybody. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for coming. oh, that's so nice. in the just the world, there's a lot going on in the universe right now. did you see the big super bloody lunar moon last night? the super moon was the reason all your facebook friends posted blurry pictures of the sky last night. a major astronomical event. it won't happen again until the year 2033. i was really excited about it. i read about it last week but i forget things. i set a reminder to go outside and look at it. but i was so eager to see it i didn't need the alarm. i went outside 6:45 last night. as soon as it started to get dark i waited. for a full 20, 30, 40 minutes i couldn't find the moon. i waited. i was in front of my house. well, maybe -- i went to the

on "jimmy kimmel live," mt >>> and now, abc's "jimmy kimmel live." >> dicky: from brooklyn, it's "jimmyight -- michael j. fox. bernie sanders. and music from big grams. brought to you by cigna. with cleto and the cletones. and now, can you believe it -- here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

♪ >> dicky: the jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented by samsung. >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmeled to matt damon enough. "nightline" is next but first, their album is called "too." making their television debut with the song "west coast," fidlar! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ ah-ah-ah-ahh ah-ah-ah-ah ah ah-ah-ah-ahh ah-ah-ah-ah ah ♪ ♪ ah-ah-ah-ahh ah-ah-ah-ah ah ah-ah-ah-ahh ah-ah-ah-ah ah ♪ ♪ checked out i'm waiting for the weekend hooked up it's alright i'm leaving ♪ ♪ but i don't ever wanna go ♪ skip school i'm already failing told mom and dad that i'm bailing ♪ ♪ now we're driving up the coast ♪ ♪ ah-ah-ah-ahh ah-ah-ah-ah ah ah-ah-ah-ahh ah-ah-ah-ah ah ♪ ♪ cracked out and sleepless in seattle got drunk and barfed on my shadow ♪ ♪ i don't ever wanna go ♪ got high and ended up in portland but you can't buy liquor in oregon ♪ ♪ so we'll just talk and bum some smokes ♪ ♪ woke up you caught me with a smile passed out on your bathroom tile ♪ ♪ man i think that this is home ♪ ♪ so sad, i should've told her something call her up and talk about nothing ♪ ♪ but i forgot i lost my phone ♪ a

it's "jimmy kimmel live"! from kelsea ballerini, with cleto and the cletones. and now, just relax. here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

was held against my will -- >> what did it feel like to be sitting there wishing you were on the jimmy kimmel show and not what did that feel like? >> jimmy: i was terrified. >> really, really? yeah, okay, okay. >> jimmy: you taped up my -- >> keep talking, what else did it feel like? >> jimmy: it effectively felt like duct tape was suffocating me. that's what it felt like. you taped me to a chair. >> everything except the duct tape happens to me every night. >> you wanted him to experience -- >> i wanted him to know -- to try to be on the show and suddenly he's not on the show and he can't get to the show. the show's right there and he can't get to it. >> how did you work through that? >> we didn't. >> jimmy: we didn't. >> didn't talk about it, no. >> is there anything that you like about each other? can you say something nice about each other? >> jimmy: i like some of his friends. you know. ben. >> uh -- all right, to be fair, i like his show. >> that's a very nice thing to say. >> i wouldn't have waited for 12 years to get on if i didn't like the show. >> jimmy: i mean, that's -- i appreci

the first 500 visitors get into the museum for free. >>> "jimmy kimmel live" next on channel 6 followedightline." jimmy's guests tonight, michael j. fox, bernie sanders, and music from big grams. for the entire "action news" team i'm jim gardner, good night. ♪ >>> "action news" is sponsored in part by -- >>> and now, abc's "jimmy kimmel live." >> dicky: from brooklyn, it's "jimmy kimmel live." tonight -- michael j. fox. bernie sanders. and music from big grams. brought to you by cigna. with cleto and the cletones. and now, can you believe it -- here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

eyewitness news >>> and now abc's "jimmy kimmel live." >> guillermo: jimmy, so beautiful here. >> jimmy: this is my favorite spot. >> guillermo: where are we? >> jimmy: we're in the greatest borough in the world, guillermo. you know what a borough is? >> guillermo: a donkey. >> jimmy: yes, but no. we're in brooklyn. brooklyn, new york. >> guillermo: hello, brooklyn, i love you! >>> dicky: from brooklyn, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight, bill murrary, misty copeland and american ballet theatre. and music from ryan adams. brought ot you by cigna. with cleto and the cletones. and now, fuggetaboudit, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, guys. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. it's great to be back. thank you very much, i appreciate that. we are coming out all this week. [ cheers and applause ] thank you, thank you. i appreciate it. please, please. as they say in church, please be seated. we're at the howard hillman opera house at the brooklyn academy of music. allow me to say, without question, this is the worst-dressed group of peopl

good >>> and now abc's "jimmy kimmel live." >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"!onight, ll cool j -- from "the martian," kate mara -- "this week in unnecessary censorship" -- and music from andra day with cleto and the cletones. and now, hold on tight, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

and now, can you believe it -- here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi, everyone. thank you very much. that's very nice. appreciate that. relax, relax. this is embarrassing. very nice. thank you very much. i thank you. i'm jimmy, i'm the host. thanks for joining us. here at the beautiful brooklyn academy of music. all right, enough! thank you, thank you. relax. not like i'm dying or anything. but i appreciate it. thanks for welcoming me. thanks, i welcome you right back. it is great to be in brooklyn, new york. [ cheers and applause ] last night we had a great lineup. last night we took a whole audience, 2,000 people, down the block to the big jay-z concert at barclay's. jay-z gave everyone free tickets. but his wife. let me tell you something. there's a thing that happens when beyonce walks onstage. it doesn't matter if you're assistant manager at petco or a couples therapist or a 400-pound exconvict with a tattoo of a spider web on your neck. when beyonce starts dancing you involuntary. i love

>>> and now abc's "jimmy kimmel live"! >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, nathan fillion. from espn, jalen rose. from espn, jalen rose. music from father john misty. with cleto and the cletones. and now, stay put, here's jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: welcome, i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks to all of you for coming. i appreciate it. we have a lot to talk about tonight. i want to start with cat bate. a lot of you are here on vacation but how many of you watched the debate last night? [ cheers and applause ] i figure about 63% are lying but we'll go with it. turned out it was the highest-rated debate for the democrats ever. more than 15 million people tuned in to watch hillary clinton, bernie sanders, and the three high school principals they invited to fill out the stage. anyone name the other guys in the debate? okay, it was jim webb, the former senator from virginia, who looks like an angry stepdad. former maryland governor martin o'mally o'mally, the guy who comes in the picture frames. and former rhode island govern

cooper. >> have a good night. >>> and now abc's "jimmy kimmel live." >> dicky: from brooklyn, it's "jimmye"! tonight -- bradley cooper, from "the view", joy behar, legendary music man paul shaffer, and music from esperanza spalding. brought to you by google photos and cigna. with cleto and the cletones. and now, what's your problem, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

and now, on my word, here's jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: hello, everybody. i'm jimmy kimmel. hi, everyone. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. we're back home. i'm glad you're here. i'm glad i'm here too. i'm glad any of us is here. this is our first night back after a week of shows in brooklyn, new york. i think i speak on behalf of everyone. we just barely survived. had we been there six more hours we'd all be dead, right, guillermo? >> guillermo: right, jimmy. >> jimmy: does your wife know you were out late every night in brooklyn if. >> guillermo: no, no, no. >> jimmy: how is it possible she doesn't know? >> guillermo: i was working very hard for the show. her? >> guillermo: yeah. >> jimmy: what about when we're on the show and i mention you were out all night? >> guillermo: she doesn't watch it. >> jimmy: doesn't watch the show. i learned a lot in brooklyn. for instance, i learned that i have a cousin who pushes an iguana around in a baby stroller. that's right. she brought it to the show. i learned you can chargy $6 for a cu

live, justin >>> and now abc's "jimmy kimmel live." >>> dicky: from hollywood it's "jimmy kimmel livefrom "scandal," scott foley -- "this week in unnecessary censorship" -- and music from duran duran, with cleto and the cletones, and now, as far as i know, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

. >> have a good night and >>> ask now abc's "jimmy kimmel live." ♪ >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmyimmel live"! tonight, anna faris -- from "the daily show," trevor noah -- the 3rd annual canine costume parade -- and music from brett eldredge, with cleto and the cletones. and now, heavens to betsy, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, everybody. welcome, thank you. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks to all of you for gathering here. i'll tell you, i'm glad you're energetic. did you see that baseball game last night? 14 innings. it was the second-longest game in world series history. 5:09. it was brutal. i'm exhausted. my wife said to me this morning, you realize you're exhausted from watching other men play sports? and it's true. but very rude, very rude thing to say. that game last night was longer than a voice mail from your mother, it was crazy. there are a million people in new york and kansas city sleeping on their desks today. a baseball game should never be longer than the ken burns documentary about baseball was. this

jimmy kimmel live. have a great night, everyone. >>> and now abc's "jimmy kimmel live." >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, kirsten dunst -- from comedy central, nathan fielder -- and music from purity ring with cleto and the cletones. and now, fear not, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for coming. very kind. i hope you had a good weekend. i must say -- i want to say -- [ cheers and applause ] did something happen? did my parents die or something? by the way, i went to the dodgers/mets game on friday night. anybody go to any of the games here this weekend? let me tell you something, those of you who have been to the games here will know what i mean. if you're looking to pay $40 to park in a $15 parking lot, there's no better place in the world than dodger stadium. i thought i was smart. i bought a ticket to park online before i went to work. i had the parking pass that said "lot f." i pri

here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, everybody. i'm jimmy.

>>> and now abc's "jimmy kimmel live"! >> dicky: from hollywood, it's " jimmy kimmel live" ! from " the martian," michael pena. the boston fish guys, and music from slightly stoopid with cleto and the cletones. and now, how are you, here's jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: very nice. thank you. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for coming. i appreciate that. i think i have a feeling i know why you're all so excited. today is national coffee day. did you know that? [ cheers and applause ] i tell you something, i tried a cup, it's pretty good. it really is. it tastes like a mixture of tea and cigarette butts. coffee for those who don't know is an ingredient in the milkshakes they serve at in honor of national coffee day millions of americans drank coffee this morning like we always do. according to a survey conducted by staples 37% of american workers cannot get dressed for work until they have a cup of which raises an interesting question. why is staples conducting surveys about when we're getting dressed? i mean, aren't those perverts supposed to be se

it's me, jimmy kimmel! [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> anyway, the sorry -- >> jimmy: the umpire comes out. >> he rips off the mask, what's going on? sees me. don rickles! can you get me two tickets to the dean martin show? that's a true story. i save that for people that know what the hell's going on. you guys are great, you guys are great. classic crowd the way they dress. >> jimmy: yeah. we got a guy with no shoes on here in the audience tonight. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: he's not wearing shoes, don. >> they're the ones that made you, jimmy. >> jimmy: that's right. >> don't turn on these people. i got a big home with guard, an skaet estate. i saw your house, all glass house. if you fool around with the wife, everybody in the neighborhood knows. >> jimmy: i like people to see what i can do. >> that's right. >> jimmy: by the way, this is a really great box set. have you watched this? be honest, have you watched any of this? >> it's my life. >> jimmy: i know. >> yeah, i saw some of it. >> jim

. >>> and now abc's "jimmy kimmel live." >>> dicky: from hollywood it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- justin theroux -- from "scandal," scott foley -- "this week in unnecessary censorship" -- and music from duran duran, with cleto and the cletones, and now, as far as i know, here's jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: hi, everybody. i'm jimmy, i'm host of the show. thanks for watching. thanks for coming. thanks for everything. very nice. i appreciate that. i don't know how many of you are here as tourists. for those who are visiting us from other states this the may have been a confusing day today. today we have what they call the great shakeout. it's an emergency earthquake drill. it's a worldwide thing. they say 22 million people participated in it today. i had no idea it was happening. i'm sitting in my office looking out from my office, looks over the of course field, hollywood high school. all of a sudden a thousand kids come rushing out of the school. what the hell's going on over there? somebody said, it's the fake earthquake they're having. hey, do you know what to do if there i

cooper. >> have a good night. >>> and now abc's "jimmy kimmel live." >> dicky: from brooklyn, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- bradley cooper, from "the view", joy behar, legendary music man paul shaffer, and music from esperanza spalding. brought to you by google photos and cigna. with cleto and the cletones. and now, what's your problem, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> hi, everybody. i appreciate it. thank you very much. we are in brooklyn, new york. we are at the brooklyn academy of music. please sit, we're going to be here awhile, relax, relax. very nice. thank you for coming. i was hoping you would. it's great to be back. it is really great to be back in brooklyn. i have to say i'm reallin joying my week here. it's a big adjustment from l.a. i tell you one thing, people cross the street here whenever they want to and it's weird. in l.a. we wait for the light. it's a little bit of a culture shock. last night my wife and i were waiting at the crosswalk and the light was red. but even though there was no traffic, we just stood there waitin

>> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight, from "empire," taraji p. henson, matthew fox, "lie witness news," and comedian byron bowers, with cleto and the cletones. and now and furthermore, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. thank you. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. debate night. tonight on cnn the mildly anticipated first debate between the democrating presidents. if you were in vegas tonight you get to see elton john, donny and marie, the juds, or you can go and see the presidential debate. there's really something for everyone. cnn has been running a countdown clock to this debate for days now. every minute on cnn, i'm not just sure cnn understand. it's something to lead to something exciting. this does not qualify. they got a huge audience for the republican debate because of donald trump but this one doesn't have a donald trump. this one has bernie sanders. he looks like he's just barely living. he looks like he's on the verge of being alive. so they had to find a way to drum up excitement. the first

jimmy kimmel live.. >>> and now abc's "jimmy kimmel live." >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, kirsten dunst -- from comedy central, nathan fielder -- and music from purity ring with cleto and the cletones. and now, fear not, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

and now, do not be afraid, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: very nice, thank you for watching. thank you for coming. may the force be with all of you. you know, we decided that for our halloween show this year, obviously we'd all dress up like "star wars" characters. somehow i wound up princess leia. which made more sense before i had the beard. but makes very little. i could have been princess leia in the slave bikini so count your blessings. should i not be pointing this gun at people? don't worry, it's fake. let's go around and we'll go through everybody's costumes. first of all, to my right, my guillermo. [ cheers and applause ] do you know who you are dressed up as? >> joda. >> jimmy: that's right. say that one more time. >> guillermo: joda. >> jimmy: we dressed him as yoda to hear him say it. dicky is hans solo froze anyone carbonite, which is great. hey. how would a guy from boston say carbonite out of curiosity? >> cab-onite. >> jimmy: that's right. cleto dressed as c3po. it matches the sax, nice touch.

fun. >> "jimmy kimmel live" week nights on abc. >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presenteda michele, and apologize to matt damon, we ran out of time for him. "nightline" is next, but first, this is his new cd. it's called "rodeo" here with his song "antidote," travis scott. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ yeah ♪ ♪ don't you open up that window don't you let out that antidote ♪ ♪ poppin' pills is all we know in the hills is all we know ♪ ♪ don't go through the front door it's low key at the night show ♪ ♪ so don't you open up that window don't you let out that antidote ♪ ♪ party on a sunday that was fun do it all again on monday one more time ♪ ♪ straight up straight up ♪ who that at the front door ♪ it if's the feds no, no ♪ ♪ so don't you open up that window don't you let out that antidote ♪ ♪ poppin' pills is all we know in the hills is all we know ♪ ♪ don't go through the front door it's low key at the night show ♪ ♪ everybody hands up >> hands up right now. >> travis scott, "rodeo." y'all ready? keep them up. hands up. hand up. ♪ at the night show ♪ oh yeah ♪ night show ♪ at the night show ♪ o