jimmy, jimmy, jimmy, jimmy, jimmy, jimmy, jimmy. >> jimmy: you look fantastic.e it like that? >> jimmy: i love it. it looks fantastic. >> i'm doing a play. like you said, the broadway show, the roundabout, it's called "the price." i play an old man. [ laughter ] i play an old -- a furniture dealer. a furniture dealer with a -- >> jimmy: a furniture dealer. >> yeah a furniture dealer with a yiddish accent. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's fantastic. >> it's very, very good. arthur miller, fantastic and i got a great cast. >> jimmy: you really --. >> mark. mark ruffalo. [ applause ] >> jimmy: what's not to love? >> fuhgedaboudit. >> jimmy: what's not to love? >> tony shalhoub, -- hello jessica heck. hmm. the director i'm not going to mention. >> jimmy: why? >> no, no. i like him. terry kenny. very, very nice. i'm kidding. >> jimmy: this is the first time on broadway? i don't believe it. >> i've never been on broadway. >> jimmy: i've walked on broadway once. >> a couple times. i used to go a lot on broadway. >> jimmy: but this is a big deal. this

>> jimmy: first. >> word. >> jimmy: born. >> boy. >> jimmy: born. >> boy. >> jimmy: born. >> boy. >> boy. >> jimmy: born. [ laughter ] >> boy. >> jimmy: born. ♪ born in the usa i was ♪ >> "born in the usa." >> jimmy: yes, that's it! >> oh, my god. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that was my fault. that was my fault. i screwed up. i'm sorry. i screwed up because i started with the beginning and i should have just went right to born in the usa. >> "born in the usa." >> jimmy: why would i do the beginning part? oh, my gosh. >> it looked like pork in the desert. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right, pork in the desert. that's a different -- that's a a hit song, by the way. >> pork in the desert. >> jimmy: pork in the desert. >> oh, my god. this is very difficult. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: let's put that -- here you go. >> it's so funny. >> jimmy: pork in the desert. >> it's genuinely so funny. i wish you guys could be in my head for that. >> jimmy: no, you can't hear, but they're having fun. >> god, it's funny. >> jimmy: all right, here we go. you pick that and i'm not gonna look. >> all ri

jimmy: seriously, yeah. >> all of you. >> jimmy: man. >> yeah, can you -- >> jimmy: that came out wrong -- we've been here shot -- >> yeah, yeah, yeah. red room. >> jimmy: they're all great. they're all great rooms. >> they're all great rooms. well -- see, okay. let's move on. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: how is mom doing? how's your mom. >> grandma's good. she's good. she's already gone. she left after christmas. >> jimmy: did she really? >> she's like, bye. see you people. yeah. >> jimmy: what was it like having your -- your mother there? >> couldn't have done this without her. i mean -- look. i know mom is watching, because she's like, you're going to be on jimmy fallon? what time. so hey, grandma -- mom. >> jimmy: hi grandma. >> but i couldn't have done this without you, mom. you are my role model. you are an amazing woman even though you don't think you had anything to do with me. she always says that, it's like, you raised yourself. and i was like, i did not. it was you. and dad. but just having that multi-generational existence kept us all grounded because mom doesn't really play

>> jimmy. >> jimmy: come on!faking or if you were serious. >> jimmy: definitely blank. >> was it a prop drop or is this part of a skit? what's happening? >> jimmy: no, really. >> this is part of the monologue. is he going into a monologue? wait. >> jimmy: no, i was like -- i was like, cut to timberlake. cut to timberlake. do something. >> that was so funny. >> jimmy: i didn't know what to do. >> but you play too much. so don't know if it's the boy who cried wolf or not. >> jimmy: i gotcha. >> you handled it well. i'm so proud of you. >> jimmy: thank you so much. please. >> he did a great job on the globes, right? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i love you, buddy. >> you too, quest. >> jimmy: yeah, and quest. >> y'all too. >> jimmy: quest is great, too. every time we get together, it's always so much fun. and so it's -- i always have the best time with you. last time i saw you, do you remember? it was new year's eve. not this year, this past new year's eve. >> that was so much fun. >> jimmy: do remember this? >>

and now, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. very nice.ppreciate that. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for standing in the rain to be out here. it has been raining here in l.a. for not one but two days in a row. and is there someone we could sue about this? you know, people on the east coast laugh at us, because for them, the rain isn't a big deal. there's been a lot of snow. it's very cold. but if there's no sun, how is anyone supposed to believe our spray tans are real? it hurts our credibility is what it does. hey, congratulations are in order for the clemson tigers who won. did you watch that game last night? it was a wild and unbelievable college championship last night. they upset alabama 35-31. which was also the blood-alcohol content of most clemson fans after that game. the last-second victory, not only did it move the tigers coach to tears, it motivated one of the players. a kid named christian wilkins to bust both a move and possibly a testicle. he's acting like he's fine, but get that man on

pienso botox de principio en un permanente. >> jimmy: jimmy fallon ght show jimmy fallon carreras.n, yo iba; ¿que? ud. se queda en casa y mira tv, netflix y la frialdad, que es la diversion. [ risa ] sale, como, obviamente usted o.immy fallon ¿ >> ¿blanchett? los niÑos pueden ser medios. ¿ ¿ ma.n ¿ [ campana ] ¿ jugado alguna vez ud. en la nieve antes? el presente." durante el marzo 19no, ] ♪ jimmy fallon [ aclamaciones y aplausos ] ♪ denominado allon el drama de hulu "el camino." bienvenida, dancy! de hugh ♪ >> smith de paul creo. >> jimmy: ah ¿ r dentro de ello. fantastico, todo trabaja. >> es tan grande, si. semana pasada. [ aclamaciones ] ¿ : descubro sus trajes de halloween >> ¿ud. hizo? n, el es un germen. >> el es.my fallon allo >> jimmy: y eran ud. un aleman. >> yo era; si. lederhose. ]n ¿ ud. nunca sabe. jimmy: no, ud. nunca sabe. s lederhosen, otra vez. >> jimmy: no, ud. podria sacar sus lederhosen. y es mi linea que coquetea. [ risa ] la proxima vez ud. vamos >> les traere a, si. si. >> jimmy: ambos llevaremos lederhosen. >> bien, grande. yo sabia que habia una razon de

>> jimmy: yeah. >> i have that too. >> jimmy: you do? it, yeah. >> yeah. >> jimmy: it hurts a little bit. >> i'm digging too hard. >> jimmy: that's too deep. absolutely, yeah. well, i read a lot of -- a lot of the great stories in this book, "jump." a lot of them about getting your start and actually not actually living well but getting out of that situation. one of them, we didn't talk about, but you hosted the miss universe pageant last year. [ laughter ] >> when you say it and then you chuckle behind it, what am i supposed to take from that? [ laughter ] because you said you hosted the miss universe, ha ha. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: let me do it again. you hosted the miss universe pageant, meow, meow. [ laughter ] meow, meow, meow. meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow. [ laughter ] >> yeah. >> jimmy: no. and here's the way i remember it happening. at the end, you were about to announce the drum roll's gone and you go and the miss universe is -- and you say miss -- >> miss colombia. >> jimmy: miss colombia. and then you go, i'm sorry, no, n

. >> jimmy: all right good -- yeah. >> yeah. >> jimmy: how's everybody? >> we're doing great, yeah. >> jimmy: how old is the baby, now? >> the baby is less of a baby every day, he's like a person. >> jimmy: yeah -- >> he -- >> jimmy: he's 32-years-old. >> 32-years-old! [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: wow. >> he's pretty impressive, yeah. >> jimmy: ye, no. >> he's 4 -- >> jimmy: oh, so cute. >> he turned 4 in december. >> jimmy: it happens fast, don't it? >> whiplash fast, yeah. >> jimmy: yeah. >> he's really into germs, he's a a science guy. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, really, he likes germs like -- >> yeah, he was a germ for halloween. [ laughter ] a good germ, though. >> jimmy: which -- >> a good germ, yeah. >> jimmy: we don't know those -- >> and i was a light bulb. i was a germ of an idea -- >> jimmy: oh, this is a theme. this is fantastic. >> oh, yeah. and my husband was a german. [ laughter ] so we followed dennis' lead on that. >> jimmy: that's so good. >> yeah. >> jimmy: i wish i was a germ right now. >> yeah. he wants to be a space doctor. >> jimmy:

hey, jimmy! [ laughter ] >> steve: dvd! >> jimmy: jimmy, come on. this is for you. it's for you.is. [ laughter ] meanwhile i read that donald trump and his family spent thanksgiving at his mar-a- lago resort in palm beach, florida. marking the only thanksgiving dinner where you are actually allowed to bring up donald trump. [ laughter and applause ] you've got to be really careful. i guess trump really loves thanksgiving because it's the one day a year he can talk about legs, thighs and breasts without getting in tro. >> steve: oh! hey, hey! whoa! oh! >> jimmy: i saw that snoop dogg just posted a 30-minute video of himself smoking weed, eating turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, and pumpkin pie. [ light laughter ] yeah. asked if he was having a good thanksgiving, snoop said, "it's thanksgiving?" [ laughter and applause ] "oh, that's interesting. happy thanksgiving." and, finally listen to this. a doctor in arizona said there is a 25 to 30% increase in emergency room visits on thanksgiving, but don't worry. most of the time, it just turns out grandma was just napping. [ applause ]

>> jimmy: wow.arch on that. >> steve: i was just swimming. [ laughter ] swimming around. you know. >> jimmy: i was just skinny dipping, man. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: i don't know. >> steve: i had my fishing pole. [ laughter ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, aloe vera for sounding like a chimney sweep saying hello to someone named vera. 'ello, vera. [ laughter and applause ] 'ello. >> steve: good day, governor. >> jimmy: good day. good day to you, sir. [ laughter ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, gps. i don't know where i'd be without you. [ laughter ] >> steve: ah. that's a thinker. [ cheers and applause ] that's a little thinker. stinker but a thinker. >> jimmy: hey. [ light laughter ] ♪ thank you, vladimir putin, for calling donald trump's critics worse than prostitutes. or as they say in russia, "bros before hoes." [ laughter and applause ] there you go, everybody. those of my thank you notes. we'll be right back with scientist expert, kevin delaney! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ when it comes to healthcare,

♪ >> jimmy: ruff!♪ >> jimmy: thank you, "the bachelor" for making tinder seem like a downright classy way to meet people. [ laughter and applause ] there you go, everybody. those are my thank you notes. we'll be right back with drew barrymore. [ barking ] [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ sorry there's no elevator in this wing. i made you a little snack. sweet dreams! nutrition alert, enjoy that breakfast jimmy! hello mr. khaled. do you have a tax question? i use my crib as a bed n' breakfast from time to time. the question is, can i deduct some of the complementary room items? that's the question you feel me? yes, you can enter them here. great! because i love to keep my people happy. mr. khaled. jimmy what's good? i clogged my toilet up! i got you! the goalie has studied every one of your shots. she knows you're going for her left corner. she even teases you, calling the shot. but her legs are the ones trembling, not yours. time to shine. orbit. sometimes you capture the moment. and sometimes, it captures

>> no. >> jimmy: you don't? >> no, i don't. >> jimmy: you should, why not?hole movie again. you did it already. >> jimmy: it's like getting paid again. >> what? >> jimmy: it's like getting paid again is what happens. >> you could, you could. also, you're taking someone else's job. >> jimmy: oh. >> there are actors whose career is devoted to dubbing other people. the thing is that i don't like, i told this to one of your producers, i don't like the way i sound in spain. like my voice in spain -- in america it's fine. whoever it's watching, i like the one in latin america but i don't like the one in spain. >> jimmy: whoever's doing your voice? >> it's weird, too deep. then add the accent. i sound like that, deep voice. very deep, very weird. i don't like it. >> jimmy: that's interesting. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: most actors don't understand what the actors in other countries are saying. >> yeah, yeah. in french it's find. i like the way that guy there, i don't know -- they pick you and they stay with you forever. >> jimmy: you get one guy? >> you get one guy.

[ applause ] >> hi, jimmy. >> jimmy: how are you? >> i'm good. >> jimmy: nice to see you.ened to that? >> jimmy: no, i'm just -- yes, a little threatened. >> sitting behind the desk here all day. >> jimmy: all too familiar to me. >> no one can see a thing. >> jimmy: ah -- yes. i don't want to be distracting from you. >> right. >> jimmy: you look -- well, it's hard to be. you look gorgeous. thank you for coming back to the show. i appreciate this. >> you look gorgeous, too. >> jimmy: thank you so much. i -- that's what i -- [ applause ] i was fishing for a compliment. >> yes, i know, they applauded. >> jimmy: yeah, it's the best, thank you. i saw you -- you're in new york now for a while, right? this is fun. i like having you here. >> i am. you know, i was filming on an ocean thing with sandra bullock, and sarah paulson and helena bonham carter, gorgeous, gorgeous girls. >> jimmy: how fun was that? very, very fun. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: sarah paulson -- oh, my gosh. >> i know, don't get me started. >> jimmy: yes, i know. >> and then, you know, i'm in the play, so

>> jimmy: yeah. >> and that's exactly what i want. >> jimmy: oh, it's almost -- >> yes. >> jimmy: it'sis one is the last one here. this is our final topic. and for this last one, i'm going to use my phone for both of us here. >> okay. >> jimmy: we're going to try a a face swap. >> all right. >> jimmy: all right. here we go. >> mm-hmm. >> jimmy: here we go. we get our faces in there. [ light laughter ] ready? >> yes. >> jimmy: daily routine, can you describe what the typical day in your life is? [ light laughter ] >> yes, of course. i get up early in the morning, and then i go to work out for two hours. then i take a ten-mile run. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and then, come home read the newspapers in two different languages. and then, i have breakfast, take a shower, and by that time, it should be 6:00 in the morning. >> jimmy: there we go. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's all we have for our snapchat interview. [ cheers and applause ] arnold schwarzenegger! we love you, buddy. come back whenever. thank you so much. >> absolutely. thank you. >> jimmy: we'll be right back with elle fann

>> jimmy: i loved that. >> jimmy: really. >> eartha kitt was cat woman. >> jimmy: you really were onwise. >> i know, i'm dating my country. then when i was a teenager -- do you remember a tv series, got canceled after one season, "my so-called life"? >> jimmy: yeah, sure, claire danes was on it. was she at the golden globes this year? she was there last year, i know that. >> i don't know. >> jimmy: have you met claire danes? >> no, no. >> jimmy: that's going to be magical. [ laughter ] >> see how i got that in there? >> jimmy: you were on the cover "w" magazine with natalie portman. [ cheers and applause ] this is not your typical two shot. what happened? how did this happen? was this a candid moment? >> i can't believe she agreed to be on the cover with me, it's amazing. no, it was kind of just really normal. >> jimmy: did the photographer tell you, we want it to look like you're about to kiss? >> yeah. >> jimmy: or maybe do mouth mouth or something like that? >> i think it's really romant romantic-looking. >> jimmy: it is. it actually is, a great photograph. it really is. it's inte

oh my god, jimmy. >> jimmy: i was like, what is the deal? [ laughter ] >> come on. >> jimmy: yeah.na dobrev, vin diesel, and toni collette -- oh, i love toni too -- >> she's the best. >> jimmy: in "xxx: return of xander cage." take a look at this. >> roses got back together, but this is way cooler. >> wait. take your time. i know mouth-to-mouth, if necessary. >> wow! clearidge worked closely with gibbons. she'll handle support for the operation. >> and i bet a guy like you needs a lot of support. what are you, like, 220? 230? be honest. 250 is like the hard max for my swing. >> oh, come on. >> i'm kidding. it's not like i have a safe word or anything. it's kumquat. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: kumquat. nina dobrev, everybody! go see "xxx: return of xander cage" in theaters this friday. kumquat. we'll be right back with music from the xx. stick around! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ is depression more than sadness? ♪ it's a tangle of multiple symptoms. ♪ trintellix (vortioxetine) is a prescription medicine for depression. trintellix