and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, everybody. thank you very much. welcome -- welcome to our show. thank you for being here. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." going to be a good show. going to be a hot show. people are excited. quick some news though. we have some election news. i heard that microsoft founder bill gates attended a fundraiser for president obama on friday. yeah, he wasn't invited, but in typical microsoft fashion he crashed it. [ laughter ] and, speaking of the election, cnn announced that instead of using podiums at wednesday's debate, the gop candidates will be sitting at a table. which could get awkward when newt gingrich asks to see a menu. [ laughter ] 'cause then its just like -- >> steve: are these good? >> jimmy: yeah? can you just get a short stack for the table. how about these? yeah? hey, it's broadway week here on "late night," you guys!

i'm speaking, of course, about the epidemic of people eating jimmy fallon's ice cream late night snack. jimmy's... food is an unholy slurry of vanilla and fudge-covered potato chip clusters i assume painstakingly combed out of jerry's beard after lunch. it breaks my heart to think of children forced to eat jimmy's swill, especially when they're crying out for a taste of my ben & jerry's ice cream flavor, stephen colbert's americone dream ( cheers and applause ) a satisfying blend of vanilla ice cream, caramel, and funnel-covered waffle cone pieces. oh, yes. that's the sound of freedom going mmm! ( laughter ) folks regular viewers of the folks know that beginning last march, i loved jimmy fallon. we were best friends forever for six months. but then those six months ended in september, and we became eternal enemies for six months. so now i hate him. i have no idea what will happen in the next six months because i don't know any other emotions. now, i was perfectly happy to hate jimmy in seething, mercless silence, but last october, jimmy raised the stakes by somehow getting ben & jerry'

and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much! thank you very much! thank you for having me. thank you for having me here, you guys. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." [ cheers and applause ] thank you very much. i'm so excited. so excited to be here in indianapolis. [ cheers and applause ] look at all these guys. everyone's been treating us so great all day. people are coming up to me on the streets going, "hey, jimmy fallon, do you know where we can find tom brady or eli manning?" and i go, "no." [ laughter ] security around town has been really tight for the super bowl. i mean, this morning, when i got to the theater, this guy gave me a full-body pat-down. luckily, security was there to stop him and take him away. [ laughter ] it was interesting. i'm sure you guys saw this. today, schools here in indianapolis started late, because of a dense fog. [ laughter ]

i want to beat jimmy fallon like a rented mule! mule, by the way, also a major ingredient in late night snack. (laughter) just think, just think, this guy was ever my best friend for six months. oh, jimmy. how long must we fight this senseless war pitting brother against brother, host against host? caramel swirl against salted caramel swirl? (laughter) it's... this madness has to end. maybe >> maybe i should reach out to him. folks, should i send jimmy a valentine's card? (cheers and applause) >> let's do it, let's do it. okay. good idea, good people. i'll get my card stack here. get well, get worse. (laughter) to a special nephew upon his parole. (laughter) all right, here we go, here we go. valentine. all right, all right. (laughter) "my dearest jimmyest. i know we're supposed to be eternal enemies until march 3, but without you i feel like vanilla ice cream with salted caramel and fudge-covered potato chip clusters. terrible. (laughter) sometimes i lie awake at night wishing for a glimpse of your face. by i always fall asleep bef

and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, hey, everybody! thank you. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. happy valentine's day, you guys! [ cheers and applause ] happy valentine's day. oh, yeah. it's so exciting. everyone on the campaign trail is celebrating with their sweetheart. rick santorum and his wife, karen, newt gingrich and his wife, callista, mitt romney and his swiss bank account. [ laughter ] everybody -- today, president obama urged men to go big for valentine's day. [ laughter ] no, he did. he already urged men to go big on valentine's day. in fact, obama bought michelle the nicest bracelet china's money could buy. [ laughter ] he really went all out. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: went all out. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: come on. >> jimmy: go for it, yeah. did you see this? one of the awards at this week's westminster dog show went to martha stewa

and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ >> jimmy: thank you very much, everybody. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," you guys. we've got a fun show tonight. it's going to be good. welcome. hey, guys, let's get to the news here. some major, major business news. apple is facing a $38 million fine in china, because the word ipad is trademarked by a chinese company. apple is nervous about owing money to china, but then obama was like, "ah, you get used to it." [ laughter ] this is cool. arnold schwarzenegger and sylvester stallone are teaming up to star in a new action movie. yeah, it will be the first movie where the closed captioning just says, "no idea, bro." [ laughter ] [ applause ] [ imitates stallone ] [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] how long is this movie? [ imitates stallone ] [ laughter ] [ imitates schwarzenegger ] [ laughter ] get down now! [ imitates gunfire ] [ imitates stallone ] [ laughter ]

and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that sounds great. you guys sound great. welcome to the show. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. it's going to be fun tonight. big show. hey, last night, the republicans had their 20th debate. and did you see this? rick perry was actually in the audience. [ laughter ] he was sitting in the audience. it got awkward when he stood up and he was, like, "i just remembered the third department i'd cut! [ laughter ] energy! energy! you guys go back to -- it was energy. that's what i --" the debate got pretty tense. at one point ron paul said that rick santorum is a fake, and santorum responded by saying, "i'm real." [ laughter ] and then romney was, like, "yeah, i'm a real human, too, ha ha ha. let's change the subject. [ laughter ] let's change the subject." did anyone see this? paris hilton just released a music video for her new

he was 75 years old. >>> still ahead on "way too early," we shift gears to tim tebow visiting jimmy fallongiving a review of fallon's tebow character. did he like being mashed up with ziggy stardust? we'll have his reaction. >>> and mitt romney breaks into glorious song yet again. that clip and a check on weather when "way too early" comes right back. >>> we're asking everyone in our country to think about how each of you can make a contribution so that we ensure that america's future is even brighter than our storied past. wake up! that's good morning, veggie style. hmmm. for half the calories plus veggie nutrition. could've had a v8. but when she got asthma, all i could do was worry ! specialists, lots of doctors, lots of advice... and my hands were full. i couldn't sort through it all. with unitedhealthcare, it's different. we have access to great specialists, and our pediatrician gets all the information. everyone works as a team. and i only need to talk to one person about her care. we're more than 78,000 people looking out for 70 million americans. that's health in numbers. unitedhea

and my husband is jimmy fallon. >> my name is lydia higgins.y husband is steve higgins, the announcer for the jimmy fallon show. >> my name is dale miles. i'm married to a.d. miles. he's the head writer. >> hi, my name is yvonne. my husband is the director of "late night with jimmy fallon." ♪ >> i'm the queen of late night. and this is my castle. [ laughter ] >> i got a personality as big as my boobies. [ laughter ] >> i'm pretty on the outside and dead on the inside. [ laughter ] >> i am about to show these ladies who the boss is. ♪ >> hello, indiana! [ cheers and applause ] my husband's in town for the super bowl and the queen of late night is taking the city by storm. okay, indiapolis? i'm here. i got a hot rear. get used to it. [ laughter ] >> i want to be here forever. i just never want to leave indianapolis. >> we're here for the super bowl, which is very exciting. i haven't been this excited since my stevie switched to boxer briefs. extra large in the pouch area, of course. >> these are numerals, guys. these are numerals. >> well, it's s

applause ] well, well, well. >> jimmy: well, well. >> well, well, well. >> jimmy: well, well. >> jimmy fallon that is your real name. >> yes it is. that's right. >> it's not james? >> jimmy: well, it is james, but my friends call my jimmy. >> well, isn't that interesting, james? >> jimmy: stephen, i thought that you wanted to be friends. >> and you fell for my ruse, hook, line and scooper. [ laughter ] i just needed to get close enough to you. to launch my sneak attack. ben, jerry! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ben & jerry! kill! >> jimmy: ben & jerry? of ben & jerry's? >> the very same. and they are going to rock your world. jerry, tell jimmy the latest sales figures for americone dream. >> in the last quarter, americone dream outsold "late night" snack by 8%. [ boos ] >> boom! boom! eat it, fallon! eat my ice cream. [ laughter ] oh, wait. you can't. because it's sold out at the grocery store. americone dream is number one. >> actually, cherry garcia is the number one ice cream. >> shut up. [ laughter ] too late. ha ha! ha ha ha ha ha ha h-a-h-a i say, jimmy fallon! [ laughter ] i am out of here

jimmy fallon and stephen colbert each have their own ben and jerry's ice cream fallon. stephen colbert americone dream. they have turned the former best friends in enemies as they battle to outsell each other in the stores. last night on "late night" jimmy fallon received a heart warming valentine's card from colbert prompting hopes for peace treaty, when fallon thinks they are back to being friends, the ice cream war heats up. >> did you get the present i sent you? >> what, the rabbit? >> no, the big present! >> guys did we get a present from stephen colbert? whoa! >> not so fast! >> well, well, well. >> well, well. >> well, well, well. >> i thought you wanted to be friends. >> you fell for my ruse, hook line and scooper! i just needed to get close enough to you to launch my sneak attack, ben, jerry! jerry, tell jimmy the latest sales figure force americone dream. >> in the last quarter, americone dream outsold late night snack by 8%. >> boom! eat it fallon, eat my ice cream! you can't because it's sold out at the grocery store. later, sucker! >> stephen! >> jimmy! >>

and now, here he is -- jimmy fallon! cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah! thank you very much! i appreciate it! that the loudest one yet. [ cheers and applause ] thank you, guys. welcome to "late night," everybody. thank you very much. welcome, everybody. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." you guys, i am so -- [ cheers and applause ] -- excited. feeling good. i'm so excited for super bowl sunday. i'm having the best time here in indianapolis. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. this is nice. i read that 8,000 unpaid volunteers are helping with the super bowl this week. [ cheers and applause ] and these are all people who have free time -- high school kids, retired people, the baltimore ravens. people with nothing -- [ cheers and applause ] people with nothing to do. they have nothing to do. [ cheers and applause ] it's been crazy. more than 500,000 people are here in downtown indianapolis for the super bow

it was great, yeah. >> jimmy: good, solid couple years. >> of course, jimmy fallon. >> jimmy: yeah, that as you always do. >> thank you. >> jimmy: i love your nails. you have nice red nails today. >> thank you. >> jimmy: but the last time i saw you at the golden globes, you came up, and i saw your nails, and they were little tuxedos. >> yes. >> jimmy: that was pretty cool. i've never seen that before. that was pretty cute, cause everyone was dressed up -- >> i like to think of nail art ideas. >> jimmy: don't we all? >> yeah. well, yeah. good point. >> jimmy: yeah, right. nail art ideas. everyone's into that. but i thought that was super creative. >> thank you. >> jimmy: i've never seen anyone do little tuxedos. >> well, you know, i took my sister as a date, and she was wearing a dress. and i was like, "somebody needs to escort me wearing a tuxedo." >> jimmy: yes, of course. hello, sir. >> ten little friends. >> jimmy: ten friends. yes, hello. [ laughter ] ah, my ten friends. >> my ten little headless friends. >> jimmy: of course. last time you were here, we played -- oh boy, it was a rea

you guys, all week we've on on the streets of indianapolis handing out these "late night with jimmy fallonng is coming up. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: a lot of math, but it saves you a lot of time. we asked people to take these rags to the super bowl, and when there's three minutes left to either half, wave them over your head like crazy. so i can't believe it, but we actually got some people to do it. we have footage from the super bowl. check this out, you guys. there they are. look at that guy. [ cheers and applause ] it's like weekend at bernie's or something. the guy was like tied to a fishing -- put it in the dead guy's hand. yeah, let me go up and down. i think we started a tradition, and we started it here in indianapolis. so great job, guys. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you guys it a great job. it was a great super bowl, just a fantastic game of football. did you like it, higgins? >> madonna was great. >> jimmy: madonna was great. she was not the only choice. >> steve: really? >> jimmy: yeah. they auditioned a bunch of other singers and performers and actually held the nbc auditio