[ laughter ] >> dicky: coming up, more of our best on "jimmy kimmel live this week." >> jimmy: i'm jimmy for inviting me. >> no problem. i love coming to applebee's. the two for 20 menu, with the flavor of bourbon street, you get one appetizer and two entrees, like the new creamy cajun and steak shrimp. >> jimmy: wow, that was almost english. thank you, guillermo, this sounds great. let's eat. >> and best part is that you get the app and two entrees for just 20 bucks. >> jimmy: i heard that earlier. can we eat now? >> no, that is mine. >> jimmy: what is this? >> i'm eating my dinners. >> jimmy: they're both for you? >> i told you it was two forv d here? >> i don't like to eat alone. the food is real good. >> jimmy: can i have some chicken? >> no, no, no. >> dicky: come tree applebee's two for 20 menu. one app and two entrees for just 20 bucks at applebee's. see you tomorrow. [ male announcer ] alan, come on, let's get to the food. folks are hungry. oh, of course. [ male announcer ] the new creamy cajun steak & shrimp. big easy meets big value on our famous 2 for $20 menu. see you tomorro

here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] kimmel: thank you very much. hi, everybody. thank you for watching. thank you for being here. this is our eighth-annual after the oscars special. i'm your host, jimmy kimmel. this show is to the oscars what ikea is to furniture. yes. a little flimsy, but it will do. i thought -- i thought the -- did you like the oscars tonight? i thought it was a pretty good show, right? [ cheers and applause ] seth macfarlane did a very nice job hosting. but should a 4-hour-long television show be allowed to give out awards for editing? i say no. these were the 85th annual academy awards, which is significant because 85 also happens to be the average weight of the women on the red carpet. instead of asking, "who are you wearing?" they should ask, "when you are eating?" one of these years, some poor starving actress is going to take a bite out of a microphone, and everybody's gonna be sorry. the dolby theatre, where the oscars take place, is directly across the street from us, which is why security around here is so tight. bastards confiscated

and jimmy kimmel, he reveals and jimmy kimmel, he reveals what people know about the ♪ vo:wiplus wirelesspeaker,rhead bold is the proud sponsor of singing in the shower. sure. cake or pie? pie. apple or cherry? cherry. oil or cream? oil or cream? cream. ♪ [ male announcer ] the sound of reddi-wip is the sound of joy. ♪ all stations come over to mithis is for real this time. step seven point two one two. rify and lock. command is locked. five seconds. three, two, one. standing by for capture. the most innovative software on the planet... dragon is captured. is connecting today's leading companies to places beyond it.

and now, mark my words, here's jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: hey, i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching, thanks for being here tonight. as many of you at home i know are watching from underneath an enormous pile of snow right now. winter storm saturn has been piling on the midwest and the east coast. if you are in to the blizzard, please allow me to be your big, fat, hairy human snuggy. i'm very, very warm. most people have an average body temperature of 98.6 degrees. mine is double that. i run at almost 200 degrees. i invite anyone to feel me on the way out. [ cheers and applause ] where were you when i was in high school? some parts of minnesota got a foot of snow this week. flights were cancelled, power went out, and whenever the weather is terrible, our nation's news channels never hesitate to force their weather people out into it. joe johns of cnn was covering the storm from a sidewalk in winchester, virginia, when his brain froze over, causing him to provide us with our unintentional joke of the day. >> how many inches? >> i did not bring a ruler, but i can

good stuff. >> "jimmy kimmel live", up next.his guest duane the rock johnson. >> appreciate your time.÷ú >> abc 7 news continues tomorrow morning starting at 5. tomorrow morning starting at 5. vichlt a good [ male announcer ] citibank's app for ipad makes it easy for anne to manage her finances when she's on the go. even when she's not going anywhere. citibank for ipad. easier banking. standard at citibank. okay. [ male announcer ] with citibank's popmoney, dan can easily send money by email right from his citibank account. nice job ben. [ male announcer ] next up, the gutters. citibank popmoney. easier banking. standard at citibank. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- dwayne johnson, from "the host," saoirse ronan and music from kendrick lamar. with cleto and the cletones. and now, hopping down the bunny trail, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for being here tonight. you know what this is? i know it looks like a bu

jimmy kimmel live up next. guest tonight mark wahlberg, jennifer lopez and sooins bob.ut that is our report here tonight for carolyn, larry sandhya all of us here i'm dan. thanks for watching. next newscast tomorrow morning at 4 >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live." tonight -- mark wahlberg. jennifer lopez. and "science bob" pflugfelder. with cleto and the cletones. and now -- stay put -- here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome. hi there, i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming to see us in person. glad you're here. look, i know things are a little tense between us right now, but what do you say we forget about the past and just live in the today, you know? on monday, which is martin luther king day, the presidential inauguration celebration as barack obama begins his second term as president of the united states in washington, d.c. they'll have parades, they'll have entertainment, they have music from beyonce, stevie wonder, queen latifah, movie stars like kirsten dunst, alfre woodard, queen

i could talk about it on jimmy kimmel. >> jimmy: when i was his age i would have girls say, do you playt in the band? [ laughter ] i go, yeah. are they here with you now? >> they're not here now. they're home recovering from some horrible stomach bug going around. >> jimmy: really! >> yeah, i always say whenever we take our show on the road, we have what we call the live flu. it sweeps everybody. it goes through the entire staff. >> jimmy: great. >> and we were -- we were -- >> jimmy: do you think it will continue to our show in our audience? >> i left it at home. >> jimmy: guillermo fainted. what's going on over there? >> i'm not kidding. we were in japan at epcot and my daughter said i don't feel very well. can you take me to the bathroom? i said sure. and she's one of these kids that with an open toilet there, if she's about to be sick, will turn to me for help and she's like -- aarrggghh! >> jimmy: like titus would be great. he would get it right in the toilet. >> titus, in the toilet. i saw him backstage, by the way. i got star struck by him. >> jimmy: isn't he something? >> he's a

and now if all else fails, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: very nice.lcome, welcome. thank you so much. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for taking your passion and making it happen. are you guys still mad about march? it's really madness out there. i watch a lot of college basketball this weekend. and i don't even know why. i don't like any of the teams in the tournament. i'm so far out of contention in the office pool but i watch all of it like a dog watching out the window waiting for something to happen. they are down to the sweet 16 now. florida gulf coast university beat san diego state to be the first 15 seed ever to make the sweet 16 which was a shock to everyone except my cousin mickey. this is why she went with florida gulf coast. >> and then, here it's either san diego or florida gulf coast. and i just think it's fun to say, fgc. who do you want to win? fgc. >> it looks like a unicorn filled out her bracket. but that was quite a pick, mick. now, did you watch any basketball at all over the weekend? >> no.

. >> then later on "jimmy kimmel live". >> tonight, music from kendra and the new move movie and duane johnson is here so technically i'm between a rock and a hard place. and a hard place.

and now, i'm happy to inform you, here's jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: hi there. thank you very much.hank you for watching. thank you all for coming. i appreciate your interest and your enthusiasm. i'm going to promise you one thing. tonight's show is going to be the best show you've ever seen on television. [ cheers and applause ] if at the end of the night anyone goes away disappointed, if even one person says that was not the best hour of television i've ever seen, i will -- let me think. what will i do? [ laughter ] oh, i will apologize. that's right. i will say i'm sorry. [ applause ] in fact, let me get that out of the way right now. i'm sorry this show isn't going to be the best one ever. [ laughter ] i was hoping it would be and i got carried away. i shouldn't have done it. we've got some fun stuff from our viewers today. last night, i shared a story of oakland raiders defensive tackle desmond bryant who got arrested on charges of criminal mischief. wound up taking

"jimmy kimmel live"!onight -- jennifer love hewitt, from "the walking dead", steven yeun, and music from keyshia cole, with cleto and the cletones. and now if everybody's ready, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: welcome. very nice. i'm jimmy. i'm the host. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. it's great to be back. we were on vacation last week. i missed up. i hope you had a good st. patrick's day yesterday. st. patrick is the patron saint of urinating in public. there are a lot of big parades around the country in new york, boston, chicago, all the drunkest cities have them. getting hammered on st. patrick's day is a tradition although it's for most holidays in the united states. every year on this show since 2006 our tradition is to show maybe the three greatest local news clips in the history of television. the first time i saw these clips i swore an oath to show them every st. patrick's day every year we're on the air. this happened in mobile, alabama where word of a le

commanding general on the front lines, jimmy kimmel. >>> it has to be a direct response to you coming and -- god, i hope so. >> the high stakes, big bucks battle for late night gets a lot more interesting. >>> our national lead breaking right now. the american heart association presenting a slew of new studies this hour revealing many of us are every day ingesting an overdose of sodium. salt is practically a food group here in america but how does this taste? a full 3/4 of the world population eats twice the recommended daily allowance of salt. the food in kazakhstan must be really bland because they eat three times the daily allowance, the highest in the world. don't feel superior, american. here in the states eating too much salt played a role in 2.3 million deaths from heart attack strokes and other diseases in 2010 alone. we're passing the bad habits on to our kids. in a different study also

realize, leno is beating jimmy kimmel on nbc and kimmel on cbs in that coveted 18 to 49 age group. >> well, i don't know about the rest of the panel, but i need a little nap after the show's m metaph metaphors. there were so many within the same sentence. a lot of heavy lifting. he should think about -- but i have to say that i am really in awe of the spirit in which leno has been handling this. he has always been a master at working the room. instead of going to the press, he just directly plays it to the audience and he's playing nbc at a this point. i was at a press conference more than ten years ago and closer to 15 in l.a. when it was up in the air whether nbc was going to renew leno's contract. he came to the press conference in a motorcycle. he drove into the room in a motorcycle and proceeded to do ten minutes of stand up about how screwed up nbc was.

. >> up next, kimmy kimmel. jimmy kimmle. >> abc7 news continues tomorrow morning at 5:00 a.m. >> appreciate your time. >> dicky: from hollywood, "jimmy kimmel live this week." tonight, chef gordon ramsay. channing tatum and jamie foxx. jim parsons. guillermo at the oscars. >> are you going to kiss me? >> if you want to. >> dicky: matthew fox. the cast of "duck dynasty." >> jimmy: i feel like the drummer in zz top right now. >> dicky: and this week in unnecessary censorship. and now, with the best of this week, here's jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: hello. thank you. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. [ cheers and applause ] it's a pleasure to have you here. the 85th annual academy awards. was anybody at the show? anybody? [ applause ] well, last night, the biggest stars in the world squeezed into the smallest spanx in the world right across the street from us. the bleachers are being broken down. the red carpet, they've rolled it up, put it in storage. the dirty superheroes are

and i said i'm on "jimmy kimmel" tonight, mom. she goes we don't get that in australia. : so she is not what you might call enthusiastic. >> no, she thinks i'm nothing because i'm not on australian shows. >> jimmy: you should bring her over here and show her the set. >> i can't bring them over, my mother is morbidly obese. she can't get on a plane anymore. which is a blessing. [ laughter ] i'll tell you how fat my mother is, and this isn't a i'll tell you how fat my wife is joke. she just went on a luxury cruise and got deep vein thrombosis. if you don't know what that is, it's a condition you get from sitting in economy for too long where the vessels in your legs clot up, your veins clot up and you die, right? so my mom's on a luxury cruise lying down all day, and she didn't move enough then on the boat and she gets deep vein thrombosis, and they move her into the hospital area thinking she's going to die. but that, that's when my dad's holiday starts, right? [ laughter ] he's kept himself fit and he's had a fat wife for years. he's like -- i'm on a boat! [ laughter ] he

. >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is brought to you by sony. >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmelbum "head down" comes out march 19th. from long beach, california, rival sons. ♪ ♪ one day my prayers are gonna be answered, so long i been hungry for something else ♪ ♪ where there's a will and there's a way cause the lord helps those who help themselves ♪ ♪ hey, i keep my head down ♪ but i keep on swinging ♪ hey, i keep my head down ♪ but i keep on swinging ♪ hey, i keep my head down, but i keep on swinging ♪ ♪ hey, i keep my head down, but i keep on swinging ♪ ♪ right now somebody's counting my money ♪ ♪ so much they can't see the top of the stack ♪ ♪ there's a will, there's a way, that money's going to find my hand one day ♪ ♪ and when it does, i ain't looking back ♪ ♪ hey hey i keep my head down but i keep on swinging ♪ ♪ hey i keep my head down, but i keep on swinging ♪ ♪ hey, i keep my head down, but i keep on swinging ♪ ♪ hey, i keep my head down, but i keep on swinging ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ hey i keep my head down but i keep on swinging ♪ ♪ hey, i keep my head down, but i keep on swinging

and then late other "gym mooy kimmel --" jimmy kimmle live." >> thanks. the great halle >>> well, imagine getting this knock on your door. pardon me, did you know if you have an earthquake did you know your home is not safe? abc news reporter leslie leslie brinkley is live with the story. it is not exactly publisher's clearinghouse turning up on your doorstep. >> that's right. let me outline this for you to get a scope of what they are zeroing in on. this is a building that is basically an apartment floating above an open garage area and not size lickly retro -- seismically retrofitted. >> we need to act now. >> city officials and activists all joined forces. they walked into the nearby neighborhoods to hit the buzzers and knock on doors. >> it is susceptible to collapse in an earthquake. >> berkeley launched phase one of an ordinance requiring landlords to post signs like this one. by 2007 they were supposed to crackdown on the seismic retrofitting. but a lack of fund and staffing stopped the plan. they found some residents are quite trusting. >> i felt

. >> a 16-year-old took a break from "dancing with the stars" rehearsals to talk with jimmy kimmel. >> what happened? your last name is coleman why have you decided to go with one name? >> because i feel like my name is special on its own so it is my name. >> there are no others with your name? >> not that i have met. >> and you will dedestroy them? >> no! we can share. >> jimmy kimmel airs weeknights right here, following abc7 news at 11 and then "nightline." that first name can stand on its own. >> she is amazing. >> the newest survivors of the san francisco zoo >> we want to update you on the breaking news story from davis where a deadly accident shut down i-80 in both directions. the accident involved a tractor trailer that caught fire with a sedan involved, as well, happening after 11 a.m. at old davis road close to u.c. davis. both directions closed. there are major delays and drivers are wanted to avoid that area. though word, yet, on when that stretch of i-80 will re-open. >> we will keep you posted on abc7news.com. in the meantime, at 3:00 on "katie" superstar turned super mo

jimmy kimmel has a humorous take. >> anyone fill out the bracket? it is too lates you could still put ten bucks in the garbage disposal. i lost all, i had team wolf going to the final four, but that seems like a mistake, between march madness, facebook, twitter, they say the average american worker will work a total of 12 minutes the next three weeks. >> jimmy kimmel live airs weeknights live at the new time following abc7 news at 11. >> we have more still ahead, meet muffins, mike nicco h >> coming up on abc7 news, someone so fed up with winter he is going after the famous groundhog and san mateo homeowners clean up a mess but is it enough to please the neighbors? or the city? >> mike nicco has a new pet. >> we have ann marie here. nice to see you. welcome from the humane society. tell us about the love muffin. >> this is enough fin, a four-year-old chihuahua, good with kids, loves people, a great little walker and she loves to be on your lap. she is perfect in the car on the drive and just a great all around dog. >> great with kids any age? obviou

. >> from hollywood, it's jimmy kimmel live! tonight, ellen pompeo, sean lo we, and music from lianne l lianne la havas with cleto and the cletones. and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. for welcoming me into your lyes. are you on spring break right now? how many of you are on spring break? some of you seem too old to be on spring break. a lot of people come here to california. more people go to florida. right now florida is full of very young and very old people. both of them drinking through tubes. whenever i see the news with the spring break and the kids binge drinking and going nuts, i have to say it reminds me of how much i miss snooki. she was eaten by a rottweiler who mistook her for a snausage abc six weeks ago. this happened in st. louis. a man and a woman witnessed an incident of road rage between two other motorist, two women. it turned into a physical confrontation, but instead of getting out of the car to stop it. they did the smart thing. they remained in the safety 06 their vehicle, vide

you can thank abc and jimmy kimmel for that.immel's show just made the switch to the 11:30 time slot competing directly with leno and david letterman's late snow and while the tv host and comedian does his best to rise above the late night drama don't think for a second kimmel isn't ready for battle. >> kimmel, letterman, leno. fallon. late night ratings roulette is upon us with more than 10 million viewers at stake and tens of millions of dollars in network advertising on the line. >> things once thought to be extinct could be now brought back from the dead. there is hope for nbc. it could turn around. >> as the peacock network apparently makes moves to replace jay leno with jimmy fallon, abc's jimmy kimmel fresh from his new year's move from 11:35 on abc remains unphased. >> obviously nbc is looking to move on because they did it once already. this would be the second time this has happened. so i mean it makes perfect sense and jimmy fallon is doing a great job. >> and jay leno? well, let's just say kimmel's respect for jay le

i...i mean, you...love. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- kobe bryant. nic moynahan. and music from rival sons. with cleto and the cletones. and now, i promise you, here is kimmel! >> jimmy: thank you very much. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. i hope you're all in a good mood. do you like my new shoes? [ cheers and applause ] they're the new kobe 8s. i wear an 11. these are a 14, but i'm sure i'll grow into them. kobe bryant brought these to me. kobe bryant, dominic moynahan, and rival sons are here with us tonight on the show. [ cheers and applause ] that will be fun. we had an interesting night last night. jessica simpson was here last night. she's pregnant again. she has about three babies a year now, i think. [ laughter ] apparently she has the gestation period of an opossum. enb unbeknownst to me, she decided to keep the gender of her baby a secret. ellen degeneres tried to pry it out of her to no avail. i didn't even ask her, and she blurted it out that she's having a boy. it turned out to be a big

and jimmy kimmel, he reveals and jimmy kimmel, he reveals what people know about the ♪ vo:wiplus wireless,rhead bold is the proud sponsor of singing in the shower. sure. cake or pie? pie. apple or cherry? cherry. oil or cream? oil or cream? cream. ♪ [ male announcer ] the sound of reddi-wip is the sound of joy. ♪ all stations come over to mithis is for real this time. step seven point two one two. rify and lock. command is locked. five seconds. three, two, one. standing by for capture. the most innovative software on the planet... dragon is captured. is connecting today's leading companies to places beyond it. siemens. answers. ♪ right. but the most important feature of all is... the capital one purchase eraser. i can redeem the double miles i earned with my venture card to erase recent travel purchases. d with a few clicks, this mission never happened. uh, what's this button do? [ electricity zaps ] ♪ you requested backup? yes. yes i did. what's in your wallet? [ male announcer ] start with an all new award winning car. good. now find the most hard core driver in america. that guy, put h

>> later on jimmy kimmel live. >> tonight we have music from luke bryant and jim jeffries and jessica simpson is pregnant again an >> dan: what appears to be a meteor shower is lighting up the sky on the east coast. bright flash has been spotted on the eastern seaboard. people from new england to florida have been tweeting nonstop about the bright flash even folks in canada. watch the left side of the screen captured in baltimore. there it is. a spokesman with the american meteor society says it's consistent with meteor shower. they have been fielding phone calls hundreds every hour for people who saw the light show. >> carolyn: remember blackberry? must have cellphone list is launching a new phone. the buzz is pretty good butwithl staff, jonathan bloom says blackberry is facing an uphill battle. >> university alumni director is hiding something that is not so stylish. >> i have a blackberry and it's embarrassing. >> wrapped in a two-year contract he watched his friends trade up to the newest phones from apple to samsung. >> they usually ask, why do you still have a blackberry? >> it

. >> later on jimmy kimmel live. >> thanks tonight. movey from zigy and lieutenant governor newsom is here plus from the big bang theory jimmy parsons. >> it's jim. jim par sons. >> it's jim. jim par sons. >> i guess somebody if. >> pope francis returned to the sistine chapel for the first mass of his papacy today. pope delivered off the cuff homily challenge to cardinal ta to help build up the church. sign of the pope humble nature on display today in rome. instead of taking a sedan set aside for the pope he rode the shuttle bus with other cardinal and pick up his own luggage from the hotel and even paid his own bill. his wardrobe is already simpler than past pope. he kept his cross from his time as bishop. >> woman claiming to have been pope francis childhood girlfriend says she helped him become a priest by rejecting his marriage proposal. in buenos aires today the woman said she lived 4 houses down from young man. she says when she was 13 he told her quote if we don't get married i'll become a priest. is he she is she has high hope

crew mannequin. >> okay, jimmy kimmel live airs weeknights here on abc 7 at 11:35. nightline comes on right after jimmy. >> still ahead, drama on the dance floor. >> dorothy hamill forced to drop out of "dancing with the stars." why it's not because of the fans or the judges. >>> a "dancing with the stars" shocker. >> a popular contestant is withdrawing from the competition. >> i've taken the advice of my spine surgeon, and i need to withdraw from the competition. >> olympic great dorothy hamill gracefully bowed out of "dancing with the stars" last night. >> her self-elimination means no one was sent home last night. a lot of people sorry to see her go. >> we hope she does okay with her spinal cord injury. >> great to see her out giving it a shot. >>> that's going to do it for us. [cheers and applause] >> hello, everybody, and welcome to millionaire. a couple of changes to today's show. i didn't walk out at the top of the show because i broke my toe and normally our first contestant would start the show with me here, but today we have a very unusual circumstance. my

. >> a 16-year-old took a break from "dancing with the stars" rehearsals to talk with jimmy kimmel. >what happened? your last name is coleman why have you decided to go with one name? >> because i feel like my name is special on its own so it is my name. >> there are no others with your name? >> not that i have met. >> and you will dedestroy them? >> no! we can share. >> jimmy kimmel airs weeknights right here, following abc7 news at 11 and then "nightline." that first name can stand on its own. >> she is amazing. >> the newest survivors of the san fran >> we want to update you on the breaking news story from davis where a deadly accident shut down i-80 in both directions. the accident involved a tractor trailer that caught fire with a sedan involved, as well, happening after 11 a.m. at old davis road close to u.c. davis. both directions closed. there are major delays and drivers are wanted to avoid that area. though word, yet, on when that stretch of i-80 will re-open. >> we will keep you posted on abc7news.com. in the meantime, at 3:00 on "katie" superstar turned super mom, brew bar

in basketball,is bett >> the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is brought to you by sony.fast-y because you're really fast when you go. what about you? nicky flash? why nicky? because it rhymes with flash. close... yeah. close. [ male announcer ] it's not complicated. faster is better. and at&t is the nation's fastest 4g lte network for your iphone 5. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ -only three dollars. -crazy! [ male announcer ] yeah, crazy awesome. this march, get the oven roasted chicken $3 6 inch select as one of our march featured values. now that's a great deal! subway. eat fresh. ...like i'm in italy... ♪ iciao! iciao! iciao! dude?! [ male announcer ] try the delizioso italian b.m.t., one of our fresh takes on italian. subway. eat fresh. it will if it's new outlast stay fabulous foundation. it's a primer, concealer and foundation in one for all day flawless skin. new outlast stay fabulous from easy, breezy, beautiful covergirl. people have been daring them to clean up tough messes. [ phone ding! ] another dare. they're proving that viva doesn't play by the rules. dunk it again for th

jimmy kimmel has a humorous take. >> anyone fill out the bracket? it is too lates you could still put ten bucks in the garbage disposal. i lost all, i had team wolf going to the final four, but that seems like a mistake, between march madness, facebook, twitter, they say the average american worker will work a total of 12 minutes the next three weeks. >> jimmy kimmel live airs weeknights live at the new time following abc7 news at 11. >> we have more still ahead, meet muffins, mike nicco has >> coming up on abc7 news, someone so fed up with winter he is going after the famous groundhog and san mateo homeowners clean up a mess but is it enough to please the neighbors? or the city? >> mike nicco has a new pet. >> we have ann marie here. nice to see you. welcome from the humane society. tell us about the love muffin. >> this is enough fin, a four-year-old chihuahua, good with kids, loves people, a great little walker and she loves to be on your lap. she is perfect in the car on the drive and just a great all around dog. >> great with kids any age? obvi

. ♪ >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is brought to you by sony. ♪ [ male announcer ]rue automotive breakthrough? ♪ you give it bold styling, unsurpassed luxury and nearly 1,000 improvements. the redesigned 2013 glk. see your authorized mercedes-benz dealer for exceptional offers through mercedes-benz financial services. the ins and outs and how to get things done. through mercedes-benz you can bring me any tax problem and i will deal with it. we know and we understand. tax laws. tax theories. the more complicated, the better. just bring it on. the people of bp made a commitment to the gulf., and every day since, we've worked hard to keep it. today, the beaches and gulf are open for everyone to enjoy. we've shared what we've learned, so we can all produce energy more safely. bp's also committed to america. we support nearly two-hundred-fifty thousand jobs and invest more here than anywhere else. we're working to fuel america for generations to come. our commitment has never been stronger. my name is taho and i'm a fish guy. it's a labor of love. it's a lot of labor and

and now, here's jimmy kimmel! >> thank you for watching, thank you for. co-ing. we have celebrity dancing celebrity diving. the supreme court heard arguments on the constitutionality of same-sex marriage. it could be a major blow for those who believe that marriage should be between two bitterly and eventually overweight people of the opposite sex. the arguments against were lawyers for conservative activist groups and the arguments for it will be delivered tomorrow in song. if the supreme court overturns either prop 8 or the defense of marriage act, it could mean that, you know those guys who said they couldn't be married until gay people had the right to get married, they're screwed. i honestly don't understand what the -- [ applause ] -- what the big deal is. if you want to be gay and get married, get a sex change. get married then get changed back to what you were before. as if kim and kris' fairy tale

. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- zach braff."the walking dead," lauren cohan. and music from sound city players on hollywood boulevard. with cleto and the cletones. and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi, everyone. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. we've got a very big show for you tonight. i'm glad you're enthusiastic because everyone in our neighborhood wants to kill us tonight and i'll explain why. zach braff and lauren cohan are here. that's not why. but we have an all-star musical performance for you this evening from sound city players. that's rick springfield, john fogerty, foo fighters. [ cheers and applause ] maybe the weirdest super group of all time. we shut hollywood boulevard down tonight to accommodate all the fans that are out there. hollywood boulevard only shuts down for major movie premieres, the academy awards, and any time a bum dressed as a superhero vomits on a child. [ laughter ] so this is special. and we have special guests out

. >> dickey: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- halle berry, elle fanning, and music from rdgldgrn with cleto and the cletones. and now watch your step. here's jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: welcome, welcome. thank you for joining me. that's very nice. do we have spring breakers in the audience tonight? you had week off? the kids in china only get six minutes off for spring break. most colleges in the united states are on spring break this week. these kids go all the way to florida and they don't stop to visit nana and grandpa. how does spring break work for people who get their degrees online? do they go to websites about the beach? i never went to spring break. we didn't have mtv growing up so i didn't know about it. but i can sit in my bathtub with a four back of wine coolers. there are a lot of people on vacation here in hollywood. people from all over the globe congregate here which makes this the ideal time to play one of my favorite games called foreigner or not. you're not a foreigner? >> i want to congratulate you

crew mannequin. >> okay, jimmy kimmel live airs weeknights here on abc 7 at 11:35.ightline comes on right after jimmy. >> still ahead, drama on the dance floor. >> dorothy hamill forced to drop out of "dancing with the stars." why it's not because of the fans or the judges. >>> a "dancing with the stars" shocker. >> a popular contestant is withdrawing from the competition. >> i've taken the advice of my spine surgeon, and i need to withdraw from the competition. >> olympic great dorothy hamill gracefully bowed out of "dancing with the stars" last night. >> her self-elimination means no one was sent home last night. a lot of people sorry to see her go. >> we hope she does okay with her spinal cord injury. >> great to see her out giving it a shot. >>> that's going to do it for us. thanks for joining

. >> there are some things so >> announcer: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight gerard butler. vanessa hudgens. and music from t.i. with cleo and the cletones. and now, before anyone says anything, here's jimmy kimmel! . >> thank you for watching. hey, i have a question. i'm glad you have a lot of energy. are you ready to push your bodies to the ultimate limit tonight? [ cheers and applause ] >> well, i'm not. we'll push our bodies to the limit some other time. you know, tomorrow is the first official day of spring, although you would not know it if you live in new england or the great lakes where heavy snow is falling again. some parts of new england are expected to get 20 inches of snow before the storm was done. do you remember that groundhog who said we would have an early winter and early spring? we should eat him. someone has to pay for this. most of the country is freezing cold right now. but we don't really have weather here in l.a., so our meteorologists are forced to find other ways to fill time. on ktla, which is a local channel, here on wednes

and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you for watching. thank you for making a priority in your life, well above your family and maybe just slightly below your friends. we have quite a show lined up for you tonight. we have music from devine fits tonight. and who i wagered $1,000 to win "dancing with the stars zendaya is here. she only has one name. and the great bruce willis is with us tonight. if a terrorist tried to take this show hostage, they have a hell of a surprise coming. i have a question for bruce willis, why are you the only white guy who looks good with a shaved head? today is the second day on which the supreme court heard arguments for and against same-sex marriage, commonly referred to as gay marriage, which is commonly referred to as the magic of siegfried and roy. the constitutionality of marriage act defines marriage as a union between one man and one impossible woman. i hope they legalize gay marriage because mostly i need to be alive when gay divorce court hits the air. that's how i'll be spending my days. there are a

. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- kelly ripa. space entrepreneur, elon musk. and music from the mowgli's. with cleto and the cletones. and now, once more, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi there, welcome. that's very nice. thank you, welcome. welcome to the show. thank you for watching at home. thank you for coming to work with me. you did the right thing. we have some fun stuff playing for you tonight. first of all, kelly ripa is here with us tonight. [ cheers and applause ] a lot of fun. she jogged here from new york. [ laughter ] it took her an hour and 20 minutes. she is very, very speedy. we'll be joined by a brilliant guy, elon musk. he co-founded pay pal, the space transport company, space x which is working to send us to other planets and he is only 11 years old. elon musk is here. plus we've got music from the mowgli's tonight. [ cheers and applause ] and i have to say, i might be looking forward to meeting most, this kid. his name is titus. he is the star of a very popular youtube video. you can

. >> so wrong "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- sean "diddy" combs from "comedy central", ben hoffman and music from sean rowe with cleto and the cletones and now, here's just in the nick of time, jimmy kimmel! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much. hi there, i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for coming. thank you for watching at home. very nice. i appreciate that. it's monday night which means bachelor night here on abc. that must be why you're so excited. this has been a popular season of "the bachelor." women seem to be very sexed up by this guy. two weeks ago they had a special called sean tells all. tonight they had another special the women tell off. how much more all can there be. i watched the special tonight and i don't want to ruin it. but nothing happened. but that doesn't stop "the bachelor" machine from turning out tv shows like mcdonald's makes mcnuggets. >> i felt like i was duped. >> i didn't expect to fall for sean. >> and on the next bachelor, no one says anything.

he beats jimmy kimmel.of jay leno. i can make the argument that i don't think he is very funny. but i can be proven that he is good for business because of the numbers. so what is their big argument. >> the big argument is basically that his contract -- his contract ends in 2014. it ends in september of 2014. they see this jimmy kimmel character. he has only been doing 11:30 for the last little while and he has really been performing. and i think they are saying jimmy fannel has been impressing nbc, comcast they see him as a brood performer that pretty much everyone likes across the board. i think they just really want them to be installed there -- fallon has a long career ahead of him, and i think nbc has enough ratings problems as it is that pretty much anything is on the table for them right now. >> bill: how long is jimmy kimmel's contract? >> i don't know. but he'll be there for a while. >> so jimmy fallon is going to be taking over for jay leno and then you have him going head-to-head against kimmel.

good stuff. >> "jimmy kimmel live", up next.the rock johnson. >> appreciate your time.÷ú >> abc 7 news continues tomorrow morning starting at 5. tomorrow morning starting at 5. vichlt a good requires a lot of extra attention. you are watching "world news now." >> announcer: "world news now" weather brought to you by rosetta stone. save them. woolite everyday, cleans your jeans and won't torture your tanks. woolite washed clothes look like new, longer.

and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. thank you for everything, you son of a gun. let me ask, how many of you are here specifically to keep up with the kardashians tonight? [ cheers and applause ] very exciting. it makes the show feel like we're at the launch of a flavored vodka or something, doesn't it? [ laughter ] kim and kourtney kardashian are here, and so is kim's unborn baby, so technically tonight, we have two and a half kardashians. [ cheers and applause ] which is a show that cbs should make immediately. also tonight from "girls," adam driver is here. we have music from grammy nominated halestorm tonight. [ cheers and applause ] speaking of grammy nominees, did you hear about the fight between chris brown and frank ocean? according to multiple reports, the popular singers got into a tussle over a parking spot outside a recording studio on sunday night. the lapd says frank ocean plans to press charges against brown, who is still on

jimmy kimmel live up next. guest tonight mark wahlberg, jennifer lopez and sooins bob.ut that is our report here tonight for carolyn, larry sandhya all of us here i'm dan. thanks for watching. next newscast tomorrow morning at 4 many of them had already made changes to their menus and even purchased new glasses to be in compliance with the law. not a shocker at all that that got a little messy in the 11th hour. >> yeah. still not convinced that i want anybody to tell me how much i can and cannot drink. >> and look at the obesity stats. i know the argument. but obesity is a huge, no pun intended, problem in this country. the heart is in the right place. it's whether it's overstepping -- >> i think that is the biggest question. some people are worried he is overstepping his bounds and done so much to overstep in the eyes of the people who are against this. the smoking bans outside. commercial bans, awnings on the buildings. he has done a lot. >> let's debate over big gulp later. >> moving on to a baseball blooper that, well, thank goodness it happened during spring traini

you don't see jay on youtube like jimmy fallon. >> jimmy kimmel does innovative stuff. >> jimmy fallone and everybody is supposed to check in with what they think is funny. and he uses the internet. >> jimmy fallon has a laptop on his desk. >> so the bottom line, "the tonight show" is moving to new york, jimmy fallon is going to take it over, it's just a question of when. >> that would be my full take, question. >> bill carter, thank you. >> thanks. >> coming up, the ridiculist is next. if youthen this willbrids arbe a nice surprise. meet the 5-passenger ford c-max hybrid. c-max come. c-max go. c-max give a ride to everyone it knows. c max has more passenger volume than competitor prius v and we haven't even mentioned... c-max also gets better mpg. say hi to the super fuel efficient ford c-max hybrid. great first gig! let's go! party! awwwww... arigato! we are outta here! party...... finding you the perfect place, every step of the way. hotels.com are proven to be effective pain relievers. tylenol works by blocking pain signals to your brain. bayer advanced aspirin blocks pain at the s

you don't see jay on youtube like jimmy fallon. >> jimmy kimmel does innovative stuff. >> jimmy fallons supposed to check in with what they think is funny. and he uses the internet. >> jimmy fallon has a laptop on his desk. >> so the bottom line, "the tonight show" is moving to new york, jimmy fallon is taking over, just a question of when. >> that would be my full take, question. >> bill carter, thank you. >> thanks. >>> coming up, the ridiculous is next. [ male announcer ] along with support, chantix (varenicline) is proven to help people quit smoking. it reduces the urge to smoke. it put me at ease that you could smoke on the first week. [ male announcer ] some people had changes in behavior, thinking or mood, hostility, agitation, depressed mood and suicidal thoughts or actions while taking or after stopping chantix. if you notice any of these stop taking chantix and call your doctor right away. tell your doctor about any history of depression or other mental health problems, which could get worse while taking chantix. don't take chantix if you've had a serious allergic or skin rea

you don't see jay on youtube like jimmy fallon. >> jimmy kimmel does innovative stuff. >> jimmy fallond everybody is supposed to check in with what they think is funny. and he uses the internet. >> jimmy fallon has a laptop on his desk. >> so the bottom line, "the tonight show" is moving to new york, jimmy fallon is going to take it over, it's just a question of when. >> that would be my full take, question. >> bill carter, thank you. >> thanks. >> coming up, the ridiculist is next. dentity and turn your life upside down. >> hi. >> hi. you know, i can save you 15% today if you open up a charge card account with us. >> you just read my mind. >> announcer: just one little piece of information and they can open bogus accounts, stealing your credit, your money and ruining your reputation. that's why you need lifelock to relentlessly protect what matters most... [beeping...] helping stop crooks before your identity is attacked. and now you can have the most comprehensive identity theft protection available today... lifelock ultimate. so for protection you just can't get anywhere else, get l

you don't see jay on youtube like jimmy fallon. >> jimmy kimmel does innovative stuff. >> does his hasheverybody is supposed to check in what they think is funny and uses the internet. >> jimmy fallon has a laptop on his desk. >> so the bottom line, "the tonight show" is moving to new york, jimmy fallon is taking over, just a question of when. >> that would be my full take, question. >> bill carter, thank you. >> thanks. >>> coming up, the ridiculous is next. but i'll tell you what impresses me. a talking train. this ge locomotive can tell you exactly where it is, what it's carrying, while using less fuel. delivering whatever the world needs, when it needs it. ♪ after all, what's the point of talking if you don't have something important to say? ♪ but that doesn't mean ive don't want to make money.stor. i love making money. i try to be smart with my investments. i also try to keep my costs down. what's your plan? ishares. low cost and tax efficient. find out why nine out of ten large professional investors choose ishares for their etfs. ishares by blackrock. call 1-800-ishares for a pro

jimmy kimmel posed that question to some residents in los angeles.ieve the responses, worth their weight in gold. coming up. [ kitt ] you know what's impressive? a talking car. but i'll tell you what impresses me. a talking train. this ge locomotive can tell you exactly where it is, what it's carrying, while using less fuel. delivering whatever the world needs, when it needs it. ♪ after all, what's the point of talking if you don't have something important to say? ♪ then i read an article about a study that looked at the long term health benefits of taking multivitamins. they used centrum silver for the study... so i guess my wife was right. [ male announcer ] centrum. always your most complete. >> all right. for all of you who live in new york or maybe plan on visiting new york anytime soon you can breathe a sigh of relief for now. this comes after a state supreme court judge has halted new york city nanny mayor, michael bloomberg and ban on sugary drinks that was supposed to go into effect tomorrow. the judge called his ban arbitrary and capricious

what does jimmy kimmel have to say about that? >> how about the prosecutor in butler county? a great job. >> doesn't hold back his feelings about jay leno. we will have jake tapper's interview, next. you are watching "starting point." ♪ i am stuck on band-aid brand ♪ ♪ 'cause germs don't stick on me ♪ [ female announcer ] band-aid brand has quiltvent technology with air channels to let boo boos breathe. [ giggles ] [ female announcer ] quiltvent technology, only from band-aid brand. use with neosporin first aid antibiotic. only from band-aid brand. license and registration please. what's this? uhh, it's my geico insurance id card, sir. it's digital, uh, pretty cool right? maybe. you know why i pulled you over today? because i'm a pig driving a convertible? tail light's out.. fix it. digital insurance id cards. just a click away with the geico mobile app. >>> welcome back to "starting point." toddlers in the u.s. to adults around the world, many of russ eating too much salt and it's killing us, a just-released study found more than 2 million people died in 2010 from heart dise

. >> then, on jimmy kimmel live kobe bryant and musical guests tonight rival sons coming up on jimmy el. >> that does it for this edition of abc 7 news. thanks for joining us everyone. >> from all of us here thanks for watching. we appreciate your time. >> good night, everyone. this is "jeopardy!" today's contestants are an archivist r the sisters of charity from dubuque, iowa... ...an insurance specialist from long beach, new york... ...and our returning champion, a business analyst from minneapolis, minnesota... and now here is the host of "jeopardy!" -- alex trebek! thanks, johnny. thank you, ladies and gentlemen. if our champion, drew horwood, were analyzing his own business, he would come to the conclusion, "hey, it's going pretty well. i've won a lot oy in just two days." lloyd and jennifer, welcome aboard. nice to have you with us. good luck to all three of you as we put you to work right now in the jeopardy! round. this is the easier round, as you know, and i hope you like these categories today. alex: drew, you start. i'll start off with singers portrayed on film for $200, pl