>> you. >> jimmy: the guy -- oh. >> the jimmy kimmel-type character. e crispy treats. keep your eye out for that guy, he could pop back up again. >> jimmy: you have an app of some kind. am i correct? >> yeah, man, i'm so excited. in a couple months we're going to release this thing. it's essentially the t-shirt cannon of the internet. but for things that you really want. it's called deedle, named after my son deacon. people can sign up now at thedeedle.com. >> jimmy: you'll break into their malls and shoot things at them? >> we'll give free cool stuff to the country. how does that sound? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: sounds unprofitable is how it sounds to me. well, it's very good to see you. congratulations on your show. "secrets and lies." sunday nights, 9:00, on abc. ryan phillippe is here. be right back with joywave! [ cheers and applause ] >> dickey: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by at&t. mobilizing your world. the real question that needs to be asked is "what is it that we can do that is impactful?" what the cloud enables

i think it was there. >> were you excited to hear deejay jimmy and the kimmels this year? you say jimmy and the kimmels? not jimmy kimmel, but like -- >> yeah, like lie witness news. >> why not? why not? >> do you like the band jimmy kimmel just made me lie for like 15 minutes? >> yes. >> what do you think about the band so much marijuana. >> i like marijuana, i lot an of marijuana. so so much marijuana is a good name for a band, and also we need to pass this law in texas, 2015 legalize marijuana in all 52 states, period! >> jimmy: well done. we have a lot of fun here tonight. we have music tonight from spoon. gary clark jr. is here with the cletones. director robert rodriguez is here. we are live from the long center in austin, texas. we'll be right back julia louis-dreyfus. so stick around! ♪ ♪ whoo-hoo ♪ whoo-hoo >> announcer: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" are brought to you by the ibm global entrepreneur program. innovate a new way, and together we'll change the world. ♪ droid by motorola. when it matters. droid does. exclusively at verizon. get $100 off when you tra

he appeared on jimmy kimmel live. the mean tweets comedy segments have celebrities reading hostile tweets about himself. >> obama's hair looks greater i don't know why us he doesn't seem to be worried about what's going on. >> president obama's appearance on the show fulfilled a commitment he made after he fulfilled a commitment last year. watch jimmy kimmel on "action news" at 11:00. i tweeted out a link so you can watch all the mean tweets. >> the jeans tweet i thought was funny. >> a major drug bust goes down inside a train station near pittsburgh. >>> a 7-year-old boy born with a partially developed right arm receives a surprise courtesy of ironman himself. >> new this morning police believe a medical condition caused a bus driver to crash into a house in florida. firefighters in west palm beach worked frantically to free the man behind the wheel. he was only one on board the bus. one person was asleep in the house, he was not hurt. >>> restaurants can delivery beer to your home up to two 6 packs. the delivers wil

and now, let us say, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, everybody.'m jimmy, i'm host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. this is our first show back in l.a. after a long and wonderful week in austin, texas. they say austin's weird. that's like the slogan of the town. this morning i saw spider-man and spongebob fighting over half a chalupa. spongebob won. we had a very good time in austin. guillermo, what was your favorite thing about austin besides the museums, obviously? >> guillermo: oh, jimmy. the people are very nice. >> jimmy: uh-huh. >> guillermo: the good, the drinks, and the ladies. >> jimmy: right, okay. is that how you recounted the vacation to your wife? >> guillermo: no. only food. >> jimmy: only good, okay. i think texas may have broken my stomach. i really do. how many pounds you think i gained? i think we were there for eight full days. how many pounds? >> guillermo: i think ten. >> jimmy: very close. nine pounds. the weight of a human head. it's like i have another head. even my yoga pants don't fit me anymore.

all right, i'm going to give you a ticket, a vip pass, actually, to "jimmy kimmel live." nds up against the wall! wave to jimmy, wave your hands. you're on the show. there you go. thank you, man. appreciate it. [ cheers and applause ] >> sal: sir, sir? have you been drinking? >> no. >> sal: okay, why not? >> it's almost noon. >> sal: so? >> what are you planning on drinking? >> i'm not planning on drinking. >> sal: i'm going to have to write you a ticket. >> for what? >> sal: it's public display of soberness. >> i am sober. >> sal: i know, that's the problem. >> why? >> sal: we're trying to promote a party atmosphere. can't have you walking around sober. >> you must be out of your mind. >> sal: i am. it's south by southwest. okay? >> what is your problem? >> sal: you need to have alcohol in you. >> you don't have a right to tell me whether i drink or don't drink alcohol. >> sal: it's a festival. i'm going to have to write you up for public display of soberness. 60 bucks, all right? can i at least get you to untuck your shirt? >> come on, man. >> sal: come on, come on, come

i'm jimmy kimmel. ome back to the 10th annual "after the oscars" spl. ♪ >> jimmy: hello and welcome back to the tenth annual "after the oscars" special. john travolta is coming and not only that, what you see behind me is something we've been working on for quite some time. cisco built us this huge, unbelievable video wall. we call it "the wall of america." and here it is, for the first time. [ cheers and applause ] so, these people you see are looking in on us live from their homes. hello, how you doing? we have new york, indiana, new york again. let's talk to candy in chicago. hello, candy. how are you? there you are. what's going on with your friend there? >> she's putting in the password. >> jimmy: did you just have an oscar viewing party? >> we did. my girlfriend has an amazing screening room downstairs. we were watching it down there. >> i see you have diplomas all over the wall. are these your i.t. guys at home? >> believe it or not, yes. >> jimmy: oh, hello, there. let's see who else we have. ho

[cheers and applause] >> jimmy kimmel is the best. ove him from my heart. >> jimmy: thank you, yahya. you have photos of a lot of celebrities. of all you've taken a photograph with, who is your favorite? your number one favorite? >> marlon brando did not stop for me. >> jimmy: your favorite, somebody you like the best. >> now? >> jimmy: of all of them. >> mike wahlberg. i love him and he love me too. >> jimmy: who loves you too? >> mike wahlberg. >> jimmy: okay, great. so brad pitt and mark wahlberg have been very nice. let's take a look at the pictures and you tell us the circumstances surrounding the photographs. who is this in the photograph. >> lady gaga. she's not famous. somebody my friend tell me take a picture with this lady. who's that? i don't know her. >> jimmy: though is before. >> yes, after i got the picture she is famous now. >> jimmy: all right. next up? okay. who's that guy? >> i don't know his name. [ laughter ] he's actor. >> jimmy: yeah, right. >> but he don't stop for picture. >> jimmy: looks like he did. you do no

mike all of us hear i'm dan on jimmy kimmel kevin hart enjoy mike all of us hear i'm dan on jimmy kimmel kevin hart enjoy the show. see you tomorrow >> dicky: from austin, texas -- it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- kevin hart brad paisley matthew mcconaughey and tomi fujiyama with cleto and the cletones. and now, word back y'all, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: that's very nice. howdy, austin. thank you. thank you. welcome to the beautiful long center, centrally locate the in the weird and wonderful city of austin, texas. [ cheers and applause ] i'm happy for here. we are here for a whole week because that's how long it takes to get to the front of the line at franklin's barbecue. i told you i would come back and i did. i have returned, like general patton. [ cheers and applause ] i promised. that while we were here, no brisket will go unmosquitoed, no queso will go undip ped, no single horn logi while we are here. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we got here friday night. so far, i have eaten at pearla's, jeffrey's, a ola may, 3:00 a.m. pizza from home slice

cowboys' quarterback >> dicky: from austin, texas, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, from the dallas cowboys, tony romo. comedian hannibal burress. dale watson. and music from james bay. with cleto and the cletones. and now, hunker down, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: llo, everyone. very nice. hello, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. well, friends, we are in austin, texas, at the long center, amid a sea of cheers. oh, man. that's very kind. i appreciate that. by the way, do you like our neon sign? [ cheers and applause ] you know, we stole them, all of them were stolen. how we doing in l.a., we want something, we just take it, simple as that. i've been here in texas since friday night. i've been away from l.a. five days. i've already forgotten what kale tastes like. i eat my vegetables tried now as god intended. [ cheers and applause ] i have now consumed everything your city has to offer. my body is dangerously close to no longer being considered a temple. this is how i know i have a problem. last night when as

ask now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how are you doing? i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching at home. thank you for coming. it's not that i'm unappreciative. i'm glad you're here. i mean, i think i mean i'm glad i'm here. anybody from new york, east coast here in the audience? [ cheers and applause ] talked to one of my friends in new york this morning, he said they've officially had as much as the snow, twice today than they expected. schools were closed, people were slipping on ice. he said it's terrible. i told him it was 77 degrees here today. he hung up on me. sorry. you know, the only thing that's frozen here in l.a. are our foreheads. austin is close to breaking its all-time record for snowfall. they've had 106 inches of snow so far this winter. people who parked on the street haven't seen their cars since christmas. the cold is the work of what the weather channel has dubbed winter storm thor. which means marvel really picked t

and keith urban. >> jimmy: hi, i'm jimmy kimmel. >> we're coming back. >> jimmy: to return willie nelson's ♪ [loud electric guitar solo] ♪ it's a different kind of peanut butter cup. smooth and crunchy butterfinger peanut butter cups. ♪ now in minis. ♪ nestlé. good food. good life. esurwhich means fewer costs, which saves money. their customer experience is virtually paperless, which saves paper, which saves money. they have smart online tools, so you only pay for what's right for you, which saves money. they settle claims quickly, which saves time, which saves money. they drive an all-hybrid claims fleet, which saves gas, which saves money. they were born online, and built to save money, which means when they save, you save. because that's how it should work in the modern world. esurance. backed by allstate. click or call. ♪ ♪ ♪ [ female announcer ] delta touch2o technology for your kitchen and bathroom. precisely in tune with every touch. see what delta can do. precisely in tune with every touch. calls remind me to tell her happy anniversary.wife next time you talk to caroline, i'll remi

he appeared on jimmy kimmel.ean tweets comedy segments has celebrities reading hostile twitter comments about themselves. >> obama's hair is looking greater -- grayer these days, i can't imagine why us because he doesn't seem one bit worried about what's going on. >> there any way to fly obama to a golf course halfway around the world and leave him there. >> he fulfilled a commitment after he postponed the segment last year. >> i think a lot of people would like to be flown halfway around the world and left at a golf course. >> ironman visitors a brave little boy and he finds out who the real super hero is. >> the search is on to for the murderer who killed a father out walking his dog. we'll have a live update at 6:00 a.m. every cup has a story... dunkin' k-cup packs are my life. we're a good fit. a single serving for myself. it's pretty special. it is like having a dunkin' store in my home which is what i've always dreamed of. get two boxes of dunkin' k-cup packs for $16.99. your coffee, your dunkin'. wow, that

i love jimmy kimmel. i think he is hilarious. don't know if that is the first place you go to comment on situation where two police officers have been shot in ferguson missouri. >> initially bernie, we know the president stepped to the podium when the first initial incident happened monthsing a. the president stepped up to the podium. he made a pretty strong statement. people were upset. i remember he upset put seemingly police on moral equivalent as the protesters. >> right. >> how do you think he handled it last night. >> you do not preface outrage no qualifiers with regarding to outrage of shooting of police. i don't care what it is. react way eric holder reacted in this particular instance. are punks. cops are only thing separating us from chaos with civilized people. without the cops it is wild west. it is civilization has ended. you do not say, well yeah, what happened in ferguson was oppressive. however you shouldn't, you should say those punks would hunt you down like joe biden said find you to ends of the earth. that is

>> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- matthew perry -- from the wwe, john cena -- and music from for king and country. with cleto and the cletones. and now, most likely, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, everybody. i'm jimmy, the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you to all of you for coming. we have a lot to get to tonight. first up -- i need to take care of some local business. i'm a little bit perturbed. it's a national show, it's an international show, in fact. every once in a while we have to think locally and tonight is one of those nights. the end of march, we're at the end of march, it's almost april. we're well into 2015. and yet there's a house not too far from here, i drive by ever reonce in a while, i've been wait knowledge to mention this because i wanted to give them a chance to do something about it. this house still has not only christmas decorations up, a lot of christmas decorations up. not just the lights. look at this. this is the house here in l.a. v

have a good evening. >> dicky: from hollywood it's "jimmy kimmel live!"barack obama. and sean penn. with cleto and the cletones. and now, take it easy, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show.

and now, for the time being, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks to all of you for coming. i'm glad you made it. i don't want to dampen your enthusiasm, i really don't. today happens to be one of my least favorite day of the year. it's the monday after daylight saving time starts. it's terrible. it throws me completely out of whack. 6:30 becomes 7:30, 7:30 becomes 8:30, what does 8:30 become? 9:30. i don't know why they do this. even if it is necessary, which it isn't, why do we have to spring forward all at once? can't we tipty toe forward one minute a day over two months? i am proud of myself. yesterday i got in my car, i looked at the clock, i'll admit it took 12 minutes to do it while i was driving but i did manage to adjust the time in my car one hour ahead. i've never done it on the day before. usually i wait until november and it gets back even. but i did it yesterday. i still haven't adjusted in any event clocks in my house. i'll need fou

. >> "jimmy kimmel live" at 11:35 after "action news." here is jimmy with a preview of tonight's very special show. >> thanks, here's a snippet of what we're up to tonight. >> ever drive. >> can i not drive. >> i'm able to drive but -- >> just because you don't have a birth certificate? [ laughter ] you've probably picked "five things" a million times without breaking a sweat. no problem. so the pennsylvania lottery changed the name of "quinto" to "pick 5". no sweat to play. pick 5. easy to play. simple to say. you've picked out four things before, right? one, two, three, four, and you're done. simple. so the pennsylvania lottery changed the name of "big 4" to "pick 4". it's that simple to play. pick 4. easy to play. simple to say. we thought our cable internet was fast. but, our uploads are half the speed of our downloads so our internet is really half-fast. so half-fast. someone did a half-fast job posting our vacation pics. when i post my slow jams, i'm a little half fast totally half fast stop living with half fast internet. only veriz

and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: very nice. i appreciate that. very kind. that's very nice. it's too much. thank you. well, that's very sweet of you, i do appreciate it. i'm going to tell you something. we've been here since, what, friday night we got here? i'll be honest, i don't know if i'm going to survive the week. [ laughter ] i'm dying. i've been eating too much, i've been drinking too much. last night was the night i was planning to rest. i was going to go to bed early so i could finish the week strong. instead, i went to willie nelson's ranch. [ cheers and applause ] not a place for relaxation. my cousin sal and i talked tony romo, who is our guest on the show last night -- [ cheers and applause ] -- into going to a charity event at willie's an hour away from here. we do the show, we get something to eat, god forbid i miss a meal here. we cram into my car. there's a group of guys and somehow tony and i wind up in the way back seat where you put kid

. >> reporter: prayers at a vigil for the two injured officers president obama un"jimmy kimmel" saying it's understandable but violence is not. >> what had been happening in ferguson was oppressive and objectionable and was worthy of protest, but there was no excuse for criminal acts. >> reporter: bazi kanani, abc news, washington. >> all right, bazi thank you so much as always. >>> tensions seemed to be cooling a bit in ferguson. >> scott withers is live on the phone. scott, good morning to you. 24 hours ago we weren't sure exactly how the protest would turn. is it much calmer now? >> reporter: it really is. a lot has changed in 24 hours when it comes to the protest. significant sdifrps in just one day. small group of people turned out here in ferguson than the night before but also a lot more peaceful and i think it all started with -- what struck the tone was the prayer vigil that was led by local ministers and pastors that kind of started the night off and calmed the situation down at least temporarily. calmed the situation down because those are the people that then marched down t

you go to jimmy kimmel live.com and all the information is there. oh, thanks. that's the wall of america. [cheers and applause] >> jimmy: it's weird, right? and you know people are going to be naked on that thing eventually. [ laughter ] in bakersfield, taco bell started testing a new dessert item called captain crunch delights. warm doughnut holes filled with sugary cream and rolled in captain crunch. they really know how to capture the flavors of old mexico. taco bell is essentially what you get if you gave a stoner a research and development team. captain crunch delights come in packs of two for $1. or 12 for $4.49. to me they look like something you would feed a baby clown. this is what happens when people start thinking outside the bun. i'm sure you heard by now, leonard nimoy, our beloved mr. spock passed away last week. which is a huge loss for us in the united states. in canada, where he is not even from, they've been paying him unusual tribute, they've been drawing on their $5 bills like this. they call it spocking. and the idea is, you draw some spock

and now, i'm warning you, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

. >> jimmy kimmel live coming up a at 11:35 right after "action news". the here's jimmy with a preview of tonight a's show. >> thanks jim, hello philadelphia just for you tonight. >> it is called a temporary name we will come up with something more exciting. >> i happen to like national ninja warrior squad or squad run. ♪♪ i am never getting married. never. psssssh. guaranteed. you picked a beautiful ring. thank you. we're never having kids. mmm-mmm. breathe. i love it here. we are never moving to the suburbs. we are never getting one of those (minivan). we are never having another kid. i'm pregnant. i am never letting go. for all the nevers in life state farm is there. we thought our cable internet was fast. but, our uploads are half the speed of our downloads so our internet is really half-fast. so half-fast. someone did a half-fast job posting our vacation pics. when i post my slow jams, i'm a little half fast totally half fast stop living with half fast internet! see the difference for yourself. get a fios triple play online at an amazing price guaran

and now, i'm warning you, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks to all of you for coming. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's very nice. i appreciate that. it's a special day today. you know what today is? today is the 20th birthday of the frappuccino. the starbucks frappuccino. which of course is the beverage that revolutionized the way women wear yoga pants in public. the frappuccino, i didn't know this, was invented by two baristas not far from here in santa monica, 1993. it became an official part of the starbucks menu in 1995. the ceo of starbucks howard schultz wrote in his book, he said the story of the frappuccino epit myselves the entrepreneurial spirit we still have at starbucks. it's experimental, it's adventurous, it fires people up and engages their imagination. does it, though? seems like a coffee milk shake to me. anyway, to commemorate this momentous occasion starbucks is offering a birthday cake flavored frappuccino now unt

and now, i reckon, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you. howdy. how are you doing? thank you very much. thank you for joining us here at the long center in austin, texas. that's very nice of you. well, that is greatly appreciated. i don't want to leave either but i have to leave because if i stay any longer my body will turn into brisket. and i will have no choice but to eat myself. i really do have to go home. none of my clothes fit anymore. my socks are even tight. that's when you know. i had to buy a new suit. my head is so fat i had to put a hat on it. when we get back to l.a. i'm going directly to zumba without hesitation. i'm going to miss being here, i'm going to miss all of you, i really am. [ cheers and applause ] you know what i have to say? i kind of feel like you guys should stop having fun when we leave. i don't like the idea of it going on without me. but we're not done yet. we're closing things out tonight in a big texas way with the great and powerful w

leon: jimmy kimmel live is next. alison: have a good night. [ female announcer ] business travel isn't just about the going. it's also about the going home. and being connected all along the way. whether you're working or recharging do business travel on your terms. acela. take off. >> dicky: from austin, texas -- it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- kevin hart brad paisley matthew mcconaughey and tomi fujiyama with cleto and the cletones. and now word back y'all, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: that's very nice.

and now, here's jimmy kimmel! snoelt ♪ [cheers and applause] >> jimmy: nangs y >> jimmy: thank you for watching, thank you for coming. how many of you have been watching the college men's basketball tournament over the weekend? [ applause ] and how many are participating in an office pool? [cheers and applause] now of those participating in a pool at your office, how many filled out more than one pool sheet? more than one. shame on you and you and you. to me, this is unacceptable. the point of an office pool, i think, is to see who in the office can pick the most winners. it's not to make money from people you share a cubicle with. we have some people at our office, i found this out today, who filled out three pool sheets. one of them, and i won't say his name, but it's patrick frie right now he had villanova to beat kentucky. then he had kentucky to beat villanova. this guy's all over the place. unfortunately, villanova is out, which means patrick is out too. and i'm glad he is, because some of these people fill

that's sports. >>> all right, jimmy kimmel next.tion news" continues at 4:30 with pamela edwards, matt o'donnell meteorologist david murphy and karen rogers with traffic. for cecily tynan, ducis rodgers and the entire "action news" team i'm jim gardner. good night. >> "action news" is sponsored in part by -- it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- kevin hart brad paisley matthew mcconaughey and tomi fujiyama with cleto and the cletones. and now word back y'all, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: that's very nice.

it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight tonight, president barack obama. and sean penn. with cleto and the cletones. and now, take it easy, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming.

>> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- liam neeson. from "insurgent," octavia spencer. and music from awolnation. with cleto and the cletones. and now, after all, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, everybody. very nice. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching, thank you for coming. welcome to hollywood. this is a very big week for us here. tomorrow night on our show we get a visit from president obama which means that -- [ cheers and applause ] which means you just missed having to get a cavity search to get in here tonight. guillermo, have you been working alongside the secret service to make sure everything is secure for the president's visit? dpncht we're all good to go. >> jimmy: what have you fys been doing, what is the procedure so far? >> guillermo: we've been checking the doors, the exits and everything. >> jimmy: very good. we've got our top guy on this. by the way we have a great show for you tonight. liam neeson is here. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: r"run all night." you nev

and now, here's jimmy kimmel! snoelt ♪

jimmy kimmel live is next. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's “jimmy kimmel live”! van halen on hollywood boulevard. with cleto and the cletones. and now, fair warping, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

jimmy kimmel live is next.e a great weekend. >> dicky: from austin, texas, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- willie nelson. colin hanks. and music from edward sharpe & the magnetic zeros. with cleto and the cletones. and now, i reckon, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪

. >> >>> >> in honor of march madness we present "jimmy kimmel live," prank madness. >> thanks, jimmy kimmle. >> jimmy has played a a lot of pranks. to cast your vote for the best viral prank of all time. >> get ready to laugh as you check out the sin sinister 16 and remember your vote counts. >> that will be great. >> elaborate. >> remember everybody ran that bus -- because it was like a viral video. >> i do it every night. >> what the warriors did in memphis was no prank. this was business and it was we live in a pick and choose world. choose, choose, choose. but at bedtime? ...why settle for this? enter the sleep number bed. designed to let couples sleep together in individualized comfort. sleepiq technology tells you how well you slept and what adjustments you can make. you like the bed soft. he's more hardcore. so your sleep goes from good to great to wow! now we can all choose amazing sleep only at a sleep number store. right now, you can save $600 on the number one-rated i8 bed. know better sleep with sleep number. >>> good evening. the one team the warriors had not beaten this

. >>> jimmy kimmel live coming up at 11:35 right have after "action news". here's jimmy with a preright of tonight's show. >> thanks jim, hello philadelphia the here's a quick snap shot of the festivities. this tie i'm wearing do you think this is blue and black or just ugly, i don't know. norwegians are free to do everything under the sun. free to cruise at their own speed... free to explore their own way... free to discover a new world of taste... free to smile wider... applaud louder... free to live fuller, deeper, and closer... that's how you cruise like a norwegian. ♪ cruise like a norwegian ♪ book now and choose from four offers plus friends, family and kids sail free. welcome to our sales event. [crowd] thanks jan. you're the best jan. oh! nice. 0% apr financing on select models... hey, on top. you're welcome. and that's my typical day. [kids cheering] you're up. you wanna... nope. at our 1 for everyone sales event, get 0% apr financing for 60 months on a 2015 prius. offer ends march 31st. for great deals on other toyotas, visit toyota.com. this is out

and now, hunker down, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hello, everyone.

and now, fair warping, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, everybody, i'm eligiblemy. thank you for watching. thanks to all of you for coming. i don't know how you managed to get here. we've shut down hollywood boulevard for van halen tonight. [ cheers and applause ] i found it hard to believe. this is their first-ever television performance with their original lead singer david lee roth. [ cheers and applause ] their relationship is complicated but it doesn't matter. i was thinking about van halen over the weekend, listening to "jump." my favorite part is when he says, go ahead, jump. might as well jump. yeah you might as well. not like you had other things to do. van halen's been around for a long time. you know that teacher they're so hot for? she just went through menopause. the street outside is packed with thousands of fans. i heard there were 6,000 people out there. very excited. [ cheers and applause ] guillermo's out there. the fans are there. where is guillermo? oh, that's him. >> guillermo: h