people were going down and getting -- everybody was saying we have gone through a lot we deserve of kebir. there were probably some problems but not nothing bad, nothing grotesque. >> can you also talk about your first love and what got you interested? >> when i was young i think i was 12 and my mother gave me -- my interest in japan is inexplicable. it's something i don't know where it came from but my mother did give me a book of japanese poetry translated by arthur and i still have this precious copy so i've been reading it for a long time in the diaries. the crew went round the world and we just sort of trouble around. we didn't know anything, we had no contacts. alana is in those days you could go down a couple cobblestone street and go to the public and here they lived down the street and the monks were coming through in their traditional way and housewives were running out giving money and those were common sights. when i came back from the very first trip, i was living in los angeles and i immediately went to the center in los angeles and began meditation practice. after that, i s