>> from hollywood, it's jimmy kimmel live." from tonight, morgan freeman, anna faris, lie witness news, and music from motley crue, with cleto and the cletones. and now, i might also mention, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you for joining us. hollywood, home of the the

continue online. >> dickey: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live." tonight, kim kardashian -- from "the bachelor," sean and catherine -- this week in unnecessary censorship and music from jason derulo. with cleto and the cletones. and now, how should i put this, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you for coming.

>> announcer: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, ll cool j, from "marvel's agents of shield" chloe bennet, and music from vampire weekend with cleto and the cletones. and now, and not a moment too soon, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: welcome to the show. thank you for watching. [ cheers and applause ] i'm glad you're here. i hope you had the day off. i hope you had a three-day weekend. i'd like to wish each of you a happy dr. martin luther king day, a day on which we honor the memory of perhaps our greatest leader when it comes to equality and civil rights in america. you know how you can tell dr. martin luther king jr. was a great leader? he's the only person who ever had a dream that anyone actually wanted to hear about. [ laughter ] it was an exciting day of football yesterday with the exception of the patriots-broncos game. the match-ups for super bowl xlviii are set. the denver broncos will meet the seattle seahawks. both states that legalized marijuana will be represented on the biggest day o

and now, most definitely, here's jimmy kimmel! and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thanks for coming. thank you for watching. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for coming to visit. [ cheers and applause ] i don't want -- i don't want the cops to know what's going on in here. so we have to be cool. [ laughter ] i'll be honest. i'm a mess tonight. i have an ear infection, which i had to have cut out with a knife this morning before work. i woke up with a cold today. and yet here i stand before you because your entertainment is more important to me -- [ cheers and applause ] some call me an american hero. [ laughter ] others just go with american. [ laughter ] i have mixed feelings about people coming to work sick. on one hand i admire their dedication. it would be easier to stay home. but on the other hand, get the hell away from me is all i can think. [ laughter ] the best is when you come into work and you get sent home immediately. that's like -- i mean, you hit it on both ends there. what percentage of people who say "don't worr

>> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, christina ricci, from "new girl", jake johnson, and music from danny brown! with cleto and the cletones! and now, after all's been said and done, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> thank you for being here tonight. great to have you here. an interesting thing, you see a show on tv like this one with famous guests on it. and it's in hollywood with all the stars' names on the sidewalk. something for the most part exists on your tv late in your house or your computer. you write-in, you get tickets, you actually come to see the show. you see guillermo and me and you see the studio and you realize it's a lot crap pir than you mentioned, right? maybe it's just me, i don't know. well, at least the weather is nice. it's a lot nicer than it is in most of the countries. plymouth, massachusetts, got record snow fall today, 18 inches. or is like a foot, almost a foot. yeah. emergency services are asking citizens to stay inside and post status updates about how cold it is. it's around 1

and now, hang on, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you for being here from far and wide to be here tonight. i hope it's getting warmer wherever you live. the freezing weather is starting to ease up. everyone constantly reminding each other to stay warm finally paid off. in new york, temperatures went from the teens to the 20s today. so breakout the tube top and flip flops, i guess. things are improving. they say if your tongue is froze ton a pole right now, don't worry, you should be free by sunday. this is interesting. the cold spell, when all is said and done could cost the economy $5 billion because people weren't able to go to work or to stores. they were forced to stay home and make videos of themselves throwing pots of boiling water in their backyard. notice how everybody does that? and yet no one is brave enough to stand there and take that boiling water that allegedly will turn to snow before it hits. people are starting to get stir crazy. one of our writers named becky, her mother lives in oxford,

and now, and not a moment too soon, here's jimmy kimmel!> jimmy: welcome to the show. thank you for watching. [ cheers and applause ]

jimmy kimmel live >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, christina ricci, from "new girl", jake johnson, and music from danny brown! with cleto and the cletones! and now, after all's been said and done, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> thank you for being here tonight. great to have you here.

>> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live." tonight chris o'donnell. from the indiana pacers, paul george. and music from the airborne toxic event. with cleto and the cletones. and now, enough is enough. here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thanks very much. anyone who's here in our audience at the grammy awards last night at the staples center? [ cheers ] did you get married? [ laughter ] they had a big mass wedding on the grammys last night. brides and grooms and grooms and grooms and brides and brides. couples of all sexual orientations were married on the telecast of the grammys in a mass ceremony held under pharrell williams's hat. [ laughter ] that's his hat. no need to point. we see it. [ laughter ] the hat turned out to be a bigger story than the big gay wedding. but -- by the way, getting married during the grammys is a great way to save money on the videographer. you just have to program the dvr. queen latifah officiated this ceremony while macklemore and ryan lewis did their song "same love." everyone who went to the gram

. >> jimmy kimmel. >> kimmel? what? who? >> kimmel? who likes kimmel? who likes david letterman?s become a cranky liberal. right? >> what is that? >> you like craig ferguson? who thinks when fallon did the bit with spring stein who thought that was maze something right? >> jimmy fallon. his weekend updates solidify it. he's just great. jimmy kimmel is a close second. >> unnecessary censorship? you can't beat that. that is prime. one of my favorite things. >> you like mean tweets? >> i think the panel should record a series of their own. >> who do you like, andy? >> is 10:00 late night? because that would be you. >> there we are. >> jay leno set the standard others are following. jay leno >> it's also johnny carson. >> tamara? who does tamara like? >> i like all of them they're talented comedians with great staff amazing writers. >> you're doing stand snup >> i am doing stand up. >> do you have a joke? >> all of them you said i can't say. >> jimmy. >> kimmel is hilarious. >> thank you for coming. that is the time we have left. before we go it's time, don't wait. set your dvr. reco

>> from hollywood, it's jimmy kimmel live." from tonight, morgan freeman, anna faris, lie witness news, and music from motley crue, with cleto and the cletones. and now, i might also mention, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you for joining us. hollywood, home of the the world's dirtiest spider-man. the big television event tonight, not that -- one that -- not too many people want to watch but it's on every channel so we do anyway, the president's annual state of the union address. happy to say the state of the union for 2014 is colorado! congratulations. you're tiara is in the mail. the state of the union is an american tradition that goes all the way back to george washington in 1790, although i don't think it was televised back then. but the first address broadcast live on television by a president was given by harry truman in 1947 and since then, it's really just an an mule competition between democrats and republicans who see who can fake clap the loudest. the president covered a lot of topics tonight. he

coming up next on "jimmy kimmel live". actress courtney cox. >> as well as juan pablo. >> juan-uary that's our report. >> abc 7 news continues n you name it...i've hooked it. but there's one... one that's always eluded me. thought i had it in the blizzard of '93. ha! never even came close. sometimes, i actually think it's mocking me. [ engine revs ] what?! quattro!!!!! ♪ at subway! [ male announcer ] footlong fans are feeling good because january is now januany. ♪ januany, any [ male announcer ] and any regular footlong is now a $5 footlong. even low-fat subs, like the sweet onion chicken teriyaki and the ham, turkey, roast-beef-packed subway club. ♪ five ♪ $5 ♪ $5 footlong [ male announcer ] nothing stacks up to subway footlongs. with $5 footlongs all januany. all day, every day. [ male announcer ] subway. eat fresh. this is the creamy chicken corn chowder. i mean, look at it. so indulgent. did i tell you i am on the... [ both ] chicken pot pie diet! me too! [ male announcer ] so indulgent, you'll never believe they're li

and now and furthermore, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> tom: thank you for watch.ry much.

jimmy kimmel, it's cute and all that, the fact is two things.ne, we've been -- younger people have been paying for older people for the last 40 years so i don't know why that's anything new. secondly, what we don't include in that 24% are the number of people, as greg pointed out, who are in their parents plan at 26 and under which are probably a lot, so i don't know what percentage of young people really are insured now but my guess is a lot and that was obamacare that did that so i would include that as part of obamacare. everybody who is under their parents plan. >> i want you to add it to the figure you're talking about. >> they themselves said we expect 40% of the enrollees -- >> there's no question about that. they are way behind, i accept that. the idea of using people like this to -- >> creative. >> creative, and it's the right thing to do because eventually these people will have to have insurance, they just are. >> here's the problem. they are trying to get after the invincibles, the 19 to 29-year-olds, okay, magic johnson and alonzo m

and now, not only that, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much.

and now, dashing through the snow, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ jimmy kimmel live [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ indiscernible ]

here's what is coming up on "jimmy kimmel live". >> some of the magic after the news. we ask random people on the street what is the most interesting thing by. i'm unusually gifted at sewing. >> thanks for playing though. serve. >> flurry of gun fire in san diego after high speed chase. started this morning when police destroyed to stop a man for talking on the cell phone while driving. officers say he took off speeding up to 60 miles an hour through neighborhoods. they say the car matched the description of one involved in a recent shooting and the driver had a gun. firearm possible drug found at the scene. driver is in critical condition tonight. >>> just release video showing terrifying moments small plane going down off the coast of hawaii. passengers rush off the plane as it begins to fill with water. one person died in the crash last december. 8 others survived. passenger who shot the video says physically he's fine. but he still as you can understand a bit shaken emotionally. >> medical student at the university of virginia learned important lesson to never assu

>> from hollywood, i it's "jimmy kimmel live." tonight, meryl streep, joseph gordon-levett and music from johnny lang with cleto and the cletones. and now, what more can i say. here's jimmy kimmel. [ applause ] >> jimmy: we have an extra great show for you tonight. we have music from a real guitar virtuoso, johnny lang. we have an extraordinarily talented joseph gordon-levett is here. and as if that isn't enough, meryl streep as well. let's be honest. meryl streep is slumming. i'm happy she's here, but she deserves better than this. she really does. meryl streep, when it comes to act, she's peerless. she has no peers which, by the way, means she can't be tried by a jury. so really, she can commit any crime she wants and we just have to stand by and watch it. it's amazing to watch her work. she plays so many different characters and the way she makes each one of them come alive sin credible. especially considering the fact that she only does it for the money. that's true. she doesn't even like to act. she hates it. meryl is likely

and now and furthermore, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> tom: thank you for watch. thanks very much. are you here to help me sell brit my oscar nomination? unfortunately i wasn't nominated again this year. apparently you have to be in a movie to get one now. that's racist. but the nominations for what i'm told is are the 86th academy awards were announced at 5:30 this morning in beverly hills. so if your publicist called you screaming at 6:00 a.m., either you were nominated for an oscar or you're justin bieber. award nominations and search warrants are the only things that wake celebrities up early now adays. but leading the pack were "american hustle" and "gravity." best actor nominations went to christian bale, bruce dern, matthew mcconaughey and chiwetel ejiofor. i'm not sure if that's a name or a candy bar. 84-year-old june squib was nominated for best supporting actress for "nebraska." if she doesn't win, she's threatened to die during the broadcast. which would create all kinds of headaches. sadly, there were some notable snubs. matt damon did not get a nomina

tonight a conversation with michael kimmel his new book white man,ngry american masculinity at the end of an era." takes a hard look at why so many white men feel marginalized by today's rapidly changing demographics. then we will turn to a conversation with singer- songwriter johnny rivers, remembering where it all began for him on the sunset strip at the legendary venue the whiskey a go-go. we are glad you joined us. those conversations coming up right now. >> and by contributions to your pbs station from viewers like you. thank you. >> sociologist and stony brook university is presser -- professor of gender studies, michael kimmel has written about men who feel disenfranchised and has now written a tome taking a deep i'm into this serious disconnect called "angry white men, american masculinity at the end of an era." tell me why you think this is worth taking note of. i asked that for the obvious reason, there are so many disenfranchised sectors of our society that there are those who would take a look at this and say who cares about white man? they still have the best of everything

and jimmy kimmel tees off on obamacare in an epic rant that you don't want to miss. >> you know, if you want young people to sign up, maybe you shouldn't have made the law that you can stay on your parents' plans until your 26? what kid is going to say no, thanks, i got my mom and dad's plan. >>> and the most hateful tweets sent their way. >>> so tonight, the obama administration has a lot of explaining to do. the senate report reveals the intelligence community knew almost immediately the attack that left four americans dead had absolutely nothing to do with the youtube video. now on page 23, it reads, eyewitness statements by personnel indicates there were no protests at the start of the attacks. the report goes on to read on september 15th, the chief of staff sent an e-mail detailing the attacks were not because of quote, an escalation of protests. that is september the 15th. and do you remember what happened that same day? well, this administration made a mockery of this man, remember the filmmaker responsible for the youtube video? well, they paraded him for all the world to see in

comfort individualized. >>> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"!farrell, from "criminal minds" jeanne tripplehorn. and music from megadeth. with cleto and the cletones. and now you'd better believe it, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you for being here tonight. you know, there are only eight

. >> first hears "jimmy kimmel live", >> take a gander what's up with us after the news. how many kids do you have now last time it was lick 18, right. >> i'm still under half dozen. no i'm at 5. yes. >> 5 kids. >> 5 and holding. >> 5 and holding. >> which of the kids is your >> major campaign battling sugar now getting under way in san francisco. the idea is to educate the public about the health dangers. and as john explains the campaign is starting just as board of supervisors begin debating a possible sugar tax on the november ballot. >> children shouting sugar madness. part of the kick off to campaign to get san francisco to stop drinking soda. happens to copy side with proposed ballot initiative to tax sugar drinks at 2 cents an ounce. >> we need to do lake tobacco causing disease as well and to use tax policy to make sure that people are drinking less. >>reporter: in the meantime shape up san francisco has received a quarter million dollar private grant to put up billboards and bus ads in mostly lower income neighborhood warning of the health danger of drinking too

. >> but first hears jimmy kimmel. >> here's the magic waiting for you after the news. whose voice mail do you have saved. >> matthew left mae good one. zacchary daiquiri dock. at kaiser permanente we've reduced serious heart attacks by 62%, which makes days with grandpa jack 100% more possible. join us at kp.org and thrive. >> and amazing mid-air rescue. unconscious sky diver plumme plummeting toward earth is saved by the other divers. tonight dan harris sat down with the man whose fellow jump percent helped to defy gravity and the odds. >>reporter: when is james lee went out on the evenly of the airplane even though he had done more than 1,000 sky dives he had no way of knowing that his fellow jump percent were about to have mere seconds to save his life. >> i 11 the aircraft afterwards came town knocked me unconscious from then i have no real recollection of what happened on that part of the sky dive. >> fellow jumper leg had smashed in his helmet. lee is knocked out. his arms gone limp with the camera on the helmet still rolling as he free fall at times more than 12

and now, hang on, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you for being here from far and wide to

here's jimmy kimmel. [ applause ]

. >> >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, greg kinnear kenneth branagh and music from young the giant with cleto and the cletones! and now, one more thing, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: thanks for watching. thank for putting it all on the line. appreciate it. i really do.

and now, most definitely, here's jimmy kimmel! and now, here's jimmy kimmel!for coming. thank you for watching. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for coming to visit.

and now, dashing through the snow, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ jimmy kimmel live [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ indiscernible ] >> jimmy: happy holidays. only six days until christmas. i am wrapping a lot of gift right now. i am not good, i am terrible at wrapping gifts. i discovered something great last night. you don't need to wrap the gifts. get a can of silly string. go to town. it is better than wrapping. it coats the gift. what a magical time this is. on christmas eve, santa flies all around the world giving expensive presents to the rich kids. crappie cheap stuff to the poor. he is a real jerk that guy. i saw some kids getting their pictures taken with santa over the weekend. a tradition that roughly 2% of children enjoy. 98% scream bloody murder. i don't know who started this. it doesn't make a lot of sense. the man that terrified you at the mall the one we handed you over to, in the middle of the night he is going to come down our chimney. we did this last year, a lot of fun. thought we would make it a tradition. i will show you a photo

and now, here's jimmy kimmel!> jimmy: thank you for watching. thank you for watching.

that's the power of german engineering >> from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"!en wiig. from comedy central, nick kroll. this week in unnecessary censorship. and music from lord huron. with cleto and the cletones. and now, not only that, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much.

jimmy kimmel with better hair.y: you do have nice hair, now that i look at you, though. run your hand through it. are you scared of it? >> oh, that's nice. >> jimmy: you'll never get your head back. >> you have nice body. nice curve. >> jimmy: thank you. you should have told that to the writer. >> who basically called you greg kinnear with bad hair. >> jimmy: i guess it could be worse. do you ever wake up in the morning and say i wish i could interview a housewife of orange county today? you know? what was your first job in television? >> my first job in television was -- there was a cable channel. before e! was e! it was called movie time. it was a little fledgling channel run out of a former porn studio. not a good story. it was a very, very kind of rough and tumble part of hollywood here. we would go in and the idea was just to fill time. so we had a few interviews. you know, you get the epk kit. you can run trailers of movies and stuff. but there -- really, the idea was just to fill time. so there was a guy sit

and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> it was a big news day for us here in southern california. an intense day as authorities descended on the home of justin geraldo bieber. did you know his middle name is geraldo? on thursday, justin bieber was accused of egging his neighbor's house. the neighbor claimed he caused about $20,000 in damage. he throws fabrege eggs only. they got in a yelling match. they were cursing back and forth. it was very unbaby, baby, baby like. then about a dozen sheriff's deputies showed up at his house with a search warrant. i guess they're looking for eggs. i don't know. they areed his friends. police found drugs in plain view. first they thought it was cocaine. now they believe it might be ecstacy. the friend arrested is a rapper named little za. of all of justin's friends, i never thought it would be l lil za. bieber did not speak to investigators today. he's going to do that when his lawyer is present. apparently police were in the house looking for security camera footage to se

and now that i have your attention, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you.

and now, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ jimmy kimmel live ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you for watching. thank you for watching. and hey, quick question, is it yuletide or yuletime. valentine or valentide? very confusing. hey, we got an early christmas gift today from toronto. this morning, mayor rob ford apologized to members of the city council for calling them corrupt. he called them corrupt yesterday. a half apology. he said he was super, super, super, super, super sorry. it is not just food. he super sizes everything. he apologized, council speaker, demanded it. a contentious exchange between them. then something magical happened. rather than tell you about i think it best to show you what happened today. >> yeah, he is absolutely right. the mayor is. he did nothing wrong. he didn't have to apologize. good that you did, because of the way you described it, jerry. but he didn't have to do it. >> all right. before we go further on this. apparent leap they're dancing at city hall. look at that. isn't that

here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thanks very much.

i'm on kimmel. >> i'm an idiot on kimmel. >> sort of like leno with jaywalking.terview cruz and rand paul together at the state of the union. we're actively involved, i asked particularly, rand paul, he said oh, it is water under the bridge with chris christie. let's roll the tape. >> both of you have had an intramural struggle with republicans. you invited chris christie to a barbecue -- >> oh, it is all under the bridge. >> we're all getting together now. >> no pun intended. >> water under the bridge. christie, he does the bear hug with obama but wouldn't sit down and have a beer with rand paul. how about -- >> that was smooth. very nice. you know, who knows? we have a super bowl happening in a couple of days over here. >> are you going to the super bowl? >> i'm going to the super bowl. >> he is going with beckel. >> he doesn't know yet. >> it is a surprise. >> you're going to give him a ticket. going to go to the super bowl. >> and a golf cart. >> i'll be watching. >> there is a bridge that goes from the parking lot to the stadium. is christie going to close t

we have to work. >> coming up on jimmy kimmel, kim kardashian. >> thanks so much for watching.preciate you coming. continue online.

thanks for watch >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"!ar kenneth branagh and music from young the giant with cleto and the cletones! and now, one more thing, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: thanks for watching. thank for putting it all on the

. >> >> from hollywood, it's jimmy kimmel live."from tonight, morgan freeman, anna faris, lie witness news, and music from motley crue, with cleto and the cletones. and now, i might also mention, here's jimmy kimmel!

>> i think we can pass on that. >>> next on jimmy kimmel, l.l. cool j. thanks for joining us.

and now, not only that, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much. i'm happy to say that the polar vortex that's terrorized much of the united states and canada this week is just about gone. thanks to my efforts. you're welcome. i have to admit, i'm kind of s disappointed in the polar vortex. it's a pretty unsuccessful vortex if not a single person gets pulled into a different dimension. while temperatures are gradually increasing in most places, it is still very cold. in fact, if you live in an area where temperatures are still below zero, it's important to know that it's because god has forgotten you and all is lost. when a big storm like this hits it meaning our nation's weather reporters get sent out into the snow to tell us how cold it is. this is from cleveland. they did something funny. they built an outdoor news desk made entirely of ice, which was a good idea until this. >> it's been a time to turn to science and enjoy the extreme beauty of the ice. >> this is kind of fun. channel 3 is showing off our ice anchor desk. she has a few other fun