kimmel. >> "jimmy kimmel live," 11:35, 10:35 central.ogize to matt damon, we ran out of time. nightline is next, but first, their new album is called, "right thoughts, right words, right action." here with the song "bullet" franz ferdinand. ♪ while i'm away you can let the mouse go down on you let the mouse do what i'd do ♪ ♪ if i was there but you'd better explain that i have vendetta in my narrow bones ♪ ♪ and a vindictive eye of my jealousy i have no control no control ♪ ♪ i'll never get your bullet out of my head now baby i'll never get your bullet out of my mind ♪ ♪ i'll never get your bullet out of my head now baby i'll never get your bullet out of my mind ♪ ♪ i can not get your bullet out of my head now i have no control but i try yes i try ♪ ♪ so i'd better explain that i have a red vendetta in my narrow bones ♪ ♪ a wicked indicative eye of my yellow jealousy i have no control no control no control ♪ ♪ i'll never get your bullet out of my head now baby i'll never get your bullet out of my mind ♪ ♪ i'll never get your bullet out o

. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, patricia heaton from "silicon valley," t.j. miller. the national school scrabble champs and music from little dragon. with cleto and the cletones. and now, you best believe it, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: welcome to the show. thank you for watching. did you guys -- did you hear that toronto mayor rob ford's car got arrested? [ laughter ] he was not in it, but his car, a cadillac escalade, was involved in a dui. this is a weird story. so rob ford is in -- well, we think he's in rehab in a town about two hours from toronto. somehow a woman named leanne mcrobb wound up in his car. that is a picture of leanne. [ laughter ] doing god's work. killing clowns, i guess. [ laughter ] she was driving not too far from the rehab facility. police saw her weaving in traffic. they pulled her over and charged her with driving under the influence. how she got hold of the mayor's car and keys we do not know. police said she did have permission to drive it. but of co

. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- emily blunt, from "shark tank", daymond john, and music from the birds of satan. with cleto and the cletones. and now, fasten your safety belts, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ ♪ [ applause ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hello. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for being here tonight.

and now, just in the nick of time, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you. hi, everybody. i'm jimmy. welcome to the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming out to visit. thank you for standing out in the sun to get in here. it was hot today, right? it was 92 degrees in hollywood today. 20 degrees hotter than normal. which i think is god's way of telling us we should all get really dark tans just to freak out donald sterling. [ cheers and applause ] let's do it! i actually wore shorts in to work today. not just regular shorts. short shorts with my cheeks poking out. i always say, when you've got it, make people vomit. [ laughter ] . it is hot, though. thank god summer's almost over, huh? [ laughter ] we really need queen elsa to get in a fight with her sister or something. of course, when temperatures are high it is hardest here on the superheroes on hollywood boulevard. if you've ever been to hollywood, you've probably seen a menagerie of costumed characters roaming the street. i feel especially bad f

"feeling uncomfortably attracted to jimmy kimmel at the moment."thosearms, #gunshow, #theview. [ cheers and applause ] love that jimmy kimmel and barbara walters are together on "the view" this morning. and awesome muscles, jimmy, yum. holy -- i can't say that. oh, i didn't think jimmy kimmel was super hot until i saw him scrubbing barbara's star with those huge arms of his. lol, #swoon. guillermo, has anyone ever written #swoon about you before? >> guillermo: no, never. >> jimmy: thank you very much. they didn't really write it about me either, i guess. you know what? my body is no surprise to the other women in my zumba class. anyway, i would like to sincerely wish a happy retirement, or semi-retirement, whichever it be, to barbara. i heard she's headed -- she's going straight to jamaica to get her groove back. abc should make her the next bachelorette. wouldn't that be fun? speaking of the bachelorette, we have a new season premiering monday night. they're saying this could be the third or fourth most dramatic season yet. the roses have been pic

and now tonight's the night -- here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ "jimmy kimmel live" >> jimmy: i'm jimmy.elcome to the show. thank you for coming. thank you for watching. observing from backstage. this group here tonight you are among my top ten sweatiest audiences ever. very, very hot in southern california right now. not just because we have the best publicist. it got up to 101 degrees in hollywood today. although with the wind chill it was 98 degrees. you know they never had the wind chill in when it's hot do they. things are especially bad in san diego. actually go through life and you think you heard of every kind of weather condition. then out of nowhere, a polar vortex, there is thundersnow. well, folks about to introduce you to a new one, maybe new to me, i haven't heard of it. here in southern california today, we premiereed what i think is the first ever, firenado. that is nothing to laugh about. kind of like a sharknado, instead of sharks in the nado there is fire. if that isn't the work of satan, i don't know what is. i'll tell you. the fires are so bad they had to evacuate le

. >> right now on "jimmy kimmel live", julia roberts have a >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- sally field. julia roberts. and music from future islands. with cleto and the cletones. and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you. my name is jimm i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for coming to our studios here in hollywood. happy cinco de mayo to each of you. guillermo, happy cinco de mayo to each of you as well. >> thank you, jimmy. >> jimmy: have you been celebrating tonight? >> just a little bit. >> jimmy: just a little bit. and what would that entail exactly, celebrating? >> just one shot. >> jimmy: one shot. [ laughter ] but he gets it with a hypodermic needle. [ laughter ] i bet i could get drunk just from sniffing your mustache tonight. [ laughter ] you know, a lot of americans think cinco de mayo is mexican independence day. it isn't. cinco de mayo commemorates mexico's unlikely victory over the french army in 1862, which not to rain on anyone's fiesta, but how unlikely is a

and now moving right long, here's jimmy kimmel! thank godzilla it's friday. i don't usually tell traditional jokes, i don't tell knock-knock jokes, i heard a really good one yesterday. you want to hear it? here goes. knock-knock. >> who's there? >> jimmy: pooh-pooh. >> pooh-pooh who? >> jimmy: pooh-pooh in the bathtub. my niece wrote it. she is 2 years old. and i tell you, the first, the first ten times, she told it it wasn't that funny. but the 11th time that's when it became hilarious. this is interesting. potentially helpful in an emergency situation. the fcc has just introduce aid new way to contact emergency services in certain states you can text 911. which its good, because it was such a pain calling 911. first you have to dial 9 and then 1, 1 again. it's like, uh. unfortunately, it if you texas them they won't necessarily fiend you. th -- find you. they don't have the technology to triangulate your location. uber does, the police don't. 911 text is a available in parts of 16 states now. should be accessible everywhere by the end of the year. you will

right now on "jimmy kimmel liv >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- george stephanopoulos, "bachelorette" andi dorfman, and music from charles bradley. with cleto and the cletones. and now, and not a moment too soon, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] thank you very much. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. what a night. what a night of television. of dance and romance here on abc. earlier we were privileged to witness the beginning of a new season of "the bachelorette." season 10, another journey has begun. you know, christopher columbus went on a journey. lewis & clark. that was a journey. deciding which personal trainer to spend the next three months with, i'm not sure that qualifies as a journey. [ laughter ] i don't know that that meets the minimum journey requirements. but whatever you want to call, it the woman of the hour, or two-hour is a 26-year-old assistant district attorney named andi dorfman. she's the whoun during last season of "the bachelor" told juan pablo off and quit the show, which was mucho buen

and now, fortunately, here's jimmy kimmel. and now, here's jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: welcome. thank you for coming. [ indiscernible ] very kind of you. and -- we have a lot to get to tonight. but first we have to go, we are going, yes, we have to go to a high-speed chase. okay. now, what's happening here, you see there is, this is highway 50 in sacramento. a dog is loose on the freeway. it's -- he is moving pretty fast. i have to say. trying to catch him. that is some serious determination there. oh, there is the police involved. by the way the dog is having so much fun right now. a number of police cars are on the scene. they have got the dog surrounded now. well, now they don't have him surrounded anymore. and, well, no oh, we lost him. now the dog is going the other way on the freeway. oh, looks like he has exited. the dog has exited the freeway. he disappeared into the bushes some where. okay. now up against the fence, i guess. and, oh, ooh. about to get over the fence. and oh my goodness. oh my -- oh my. back over the fence. like an action movie and romantic comedy all wr

. >> right now on jimmy kimmel, actress sandra >> dickey: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- sandra oh -- "science bob" pflugfelder -- this week in unnecessary censorship -- and music from boy george with cleto and the cletones. and now after all is said and done, here's jimmy kim el! [ cheers and applause ] . >> jimmy: thank you for watching. thank you for coming. so enthusiastic. i'm sure you've all heard by now that the clippers are for sale, whether the owner of the team wants to sell them or not. and you probably also heard the rumor that oprah and i are planning to buy the team together. i want to say i have no comment on that. right now it's an idea, it's nothing more, but people have been talking about it. and as soon as they did start -- as soon as my name came up in this conversation, sure enough, lo and behold, look who decided to throw his stupid hat in the ring. >> would you be interested in buying a piece of the clippers if it became available. >> i unfortunately don't have donald sterling money but if magic wants to put money in, i'll jump in to be a

and now, first of all, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ "jimmy kimmel live" and now, here's jimmy kimmel! cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you for watching. thank you for coming to

and now tonight's the night -- here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ "jimmy kimmel live" >> jimmy: i'm jimmy.elcome to the show. thank you for coming. thank you for watching.

and now, after all's been said and done, here's jimmy kimmel!heers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, everyone. i'm jimmy, host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming.

kimmel? mr. kimmel.elivery. >> jimmy: i didn't even -- >> order it zblet. >> jimmy: no. >> we knew that you would. we're google. [ applause ] >> jimmy: sign it. >> no need to sign. we already took care of it for you. you can keep the pen. >> jimmy: oh, all right. can i have the package? >> yeah. absolutely. >> jimmy: that's great. guillermo, i got you a package. >> guillermo: thank you, jimmy. >> jimmy: want to open it? go ahead. open it up. why are you nervous when you open stuff? as if i would do anything, as if i would do anything cruel to you. >> guillermo: i don't trust you. >> jimmy: how dare you? i brought you to this country, and you don't trust me? you see what that is? that's right. it's an original v. stiviano. cherish that. >> nice. >> jimmy: you look like they're starting a mexican daft punk. >> you look great with this thing. >> jimmy: earlier today hillary clinton gave the keynote address at the national council for behavioral health conference in maryland. she also held a q & a session af

live", julia roberts have a >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- sally field. julia roberts. and music from future islands. with cleto and the cletones. and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you. my name is jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for coming to our studios here in hollywood.

right now on "jimmy kimmel liv >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- george stephanopoulos, "bachelorette" andi dorfman, and music from charles bradley. with cleto and the cletones. and now, and not a moment too soon, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] thank you very much. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. what a night.

. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- emily blunt, from "shark tank", daymond john, and music from the birds of satan. with cleto and the cletones. and now, fasten your safety belts, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ ♪ [ applause ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hello. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for being here tonight. thank you for joining us on "air conditioning appreciation week" in los angeles. it was very hot today. it got up to 98 degrees here in hollywood. in the valley, it was over a hundred. this is not a good week to be a superhero out on hollywood blvd. truth be told no week is. but especially this one. on the plus side, i guess the heat is good practice for when we all go to hell. which we will. i was in new york for the last couple of days. yesterday morning in new york i swear this is true, for breakfast, i ordered a hot dog as an appetizer for breakfast. then i had the main course of three eggs and a bagel. and about six pickles. and then i had four slices of p

and now, from now on, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] i don't mean to do personal business here, but does anyone want to buy a pair of clippers season tickets? [ laughter ] i'll give you a great deal on them. i swear. as you probably know, on saturday the owner of the los angeles clippers, real estate magnate donald sterling, was caught on tape saying very racist things to a woman who's believed to be his former girlfriend. her name is v. stiviano. he was apparently, donald sterling, upset because she posted a picture of herself on instagram posing with magic johnson. and he was upset not because magic is a former laker and there's a rivalry. he was upset because she was, quote, publicly associating with black people and magic is a black people. [ laughter ] so it's a long tape. they posted a lot of it on tmz and even more on deadspin, but this should give you the gist of it. >> you want me to have hate toward black people? >> i don't want you to have hate. that's what people do. they tur

i don't know the reason why he was court-martialed or driven out the way kimmel and short were. kimmel was the new admiral of the navy fleet in the hawaiian islands, was out of the navy by january of 1942. pretty bitter because he took the blame, the politicians in washington created it -- the roosevelt administration created a commission and asked congress to investigate what happened at pearl harbor and who is to blame and the roosevelt administration had complete control of this blue ribbon commission and roosevelt simply asked the house and senate, they complied. and somebody has to be blamed and it felt to walter short who is head of the army at the hawaiian islands in january of 1942 and husband kimmel even though the navy has done a number of studies and reports afterwards to complete the -- i have one of them here, exonerate these two men and our own government, the military code, and the u.s. embassy in washington going to the white house and the war department but it wasn't going to kimmel or short or any of our overseas commanders but macarthur has the advantage becau

and now here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ "jimmy kimmel live" >> jimmy: hi, everyone, i'm jimmy.'m the host of the show. thank you for watching. and thank you for coming to see us here in hollywood. [ cheers and applause ] i know this is a little off subject. first question, does anyone know where i can buy some linens and things? we have much in store for you this evening. the writer/director/star of a new movie, "chef," which i enjoyed thoroughly, jon favreau is here with us tonight. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i saw it last night. it is about a chef played by jon, his ex-wife in the movie, sophia vergera and his girlfriend is scarlet johannsen, especially good at casting. also tonight we will be joined by a gifted, likable, pharell williams. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: your mother calls him purell williams. tonight we will find out what the hell he is so happy about. pharell, we will compete in the what we are calling the twofie shootout, you know what a selfie is, a twofie, you don't know, is a picture you take of yourself and another person. you're either twice a

we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ >> dicky: the jimmy kimmel live concert series is presenteda-t-and-t. mobilizing your world.

and now, once and for all, here's jimmy kimmel! "jimmy kimmel live" >> jimmy: thank you very much. it's tuesday to end all tuesdays.

but first hears "jimmy kimmel live". >> thanks. sample of nonsense we have in store tonight. >> i'm nervous being here. >> really. >> my first time. >> don't be nervous. >> you have been gentle so fa >> you have been gentle so fa far.so thank idlock. teacher layoffs. and a 60 billion dollar budget deficit. that's what john perez faced when he be speaker of the california assembly. so he partnered with governor brown to pass three balanced budgets, on time. for the first time in thirty years. today, the deficits are gone and we've invested an additional 2 billion dollars in education. now john perez is running for controller, to keep fighting for balanced budgets. democrat john perez for controller. [ male announcer ] now get more of what you deserve. visit your local benjamin moore dealer today and get $50 off every $250 purchase. [ male announcer ] to celebrate, visit your local benjamin moore dealer today and get $50 off every $250 purchase. visit your local benjamin moore dealer today >> the controversial crosses of lafayette ma

. >> first here's jimmy kimmel. >> thanks. quick preview of what we are up to tonight richlt we ready yes i'm ready. here we good. and 3, 2, 1. if whoa whoa. >> pinching penny on a trip can take away from what is supposed to be a relaxing vacation. >> but what if you could get first class perk without the cost? >> like the sound of that. it can be done and we have ways to get luxury travel with budget prices. >> expensive hotel. fancy hotel. i know some web sites that offer great deals on 5 star hotel. gist on miller and his wife like luxury 4 star hotel but aren't willing to pay top rate prices. >> we are looking at going to the big island in hawaii in july. >> they bought a week stay at the area here using an auction site. they saved 30 percent off the public rate. the miller find great deal on membership site like luxury link. vacationing and jet setter. the fees are free. just require an e-mail. >> a little nerve wracking when you are spending that kind of money so quickly but again our past experience have really been gre

and now, as far as i can tell, here's jimmy kimmel!♪ "jimmy kimmel live" >> jimmy: welcome to the show. thank you for watching. thank you for joining us. i'd like to welcome you.

and now, you best believe it, here's jimmy kimmel!and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: welcome to the show. thank you for watching.

and now here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ "jimmy kimmel live" >> jimmy: hi, everyone, i'm jimmy.host of the show. thank you for watching. and thank you for coming to see us here in hollywood. [ cheers and applause ] i know this is a little off subject. first question, does anyone know where i can buy some

there's a special jimmy kimmel mother's day preview. that story and "way too early" comes back. the brilliant and beautiful jen. it's her taurus birthday today. back in a moment. i dbefore i dosearch any projects on my home. i love my contractor, and i am so thankful to angie's list for bringing us together. find out why more than two million members count on angie's list. angie's list -- reviews you can trust. thank you. thank you. i got this. oh, no, i'll get it! let me get it. uh-uh-uh. i don't want you to pay for this. it's not happening, honey. let her get it. she got her safe driving bonus check from allstate last week. and it's her treat. what about a tip? oh, here's one... get an allstate agent. nice! [ female announcer ] switch today and get two safe driving bonus checks a year for driving safely. only from allstate. call 866-905-6500 now. here we go! hold on man. is that a leak up there? that's a drip. whoo. okay. aah. now that's a leak. that is a leak! and if you don't have allstate renters insurance... game over. [ female announcer ] protect your valuables from thing

i don't know the reason why he wasn't court-martialed or driven out the way kimmel and short were. husband kimmel was the new admiral of the navy fleet in the hawaiian islands who was out of the navy by january of 1942. and lived his life understandably pretty bitter because he took the blame. the politicians in washington created the, the roosevelt administration quickly created a commission and asked the congress not to investigate what happened at pearl harbor, how it happened and who was to blame, basically. the roosevelt administration had complete control of this blue ribbon commission. and roosevelt simply asked the house and senate not to initiate their own investigations, and they complied. and, you know, it is that in politics when something goes bad, somebody's got to be blamed. and it fell to walter short who was head of the army at the hawaiian islands who was also out by january of 1942 and husband kimmel. even though the navy has done a number of studies and reports afterwards that completely exonerate -- i have one of them here -- completely exonerate these two men.

and now, first of all, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ "jimmy kimmel live" and now, here's jimmy kimmel! cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you for watching. thank you for coming to visit us here. guillermo and i are very grateful. here is how it will work. have some laughs, a couple drinks and see where the night takes us, okay. before we get going, i want to mention something. like most americans i spend a lot of my time at workshoping online. that's why the show isn't very good. so i was on the william sonoma website buying a multichopper, i always look at the sale section to see what else i can buy that i don't need. i came across this item. a chocolate easter bunny. which was reduced from $14.95 to $9.99. and i have a number of question as but this. the only one that matters, who is buying chocolate easter bunnies in may? i mean, it's not like chocolate isn't available in other shapes. can you imagine your wife comes home, a full month after easter, sitting at the kitchen table chocolate bunny all over your face. probably dial 911, right. if you did buy a chocolate bunny, if yo

up >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- jesse tyler ferguson and eric stonestreet. robin roberts. and music from circa zero. with cleto and the cletones. and now, as a matter of fact, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome. thank you for watching. thank you for coming to join us here. and yes, i am -- in case you're wondering what this is around my neck, i am wearing a bow tie. this is a gift from one of our guests tonight, jesse tyler ferguson, jesse started a charitable organization, called tie the knot. i spent the last two and a half hours trying to do just that. it's hard to tie a bow tie without your dad helping, you know? my wife is pregnant. i decided to night while i was trying to put this on i will not help the doctor with the umbilical cord. i'm going to leave that up to her. it was a -- oh, it was a very big day for l.a. sports today. donald sterling, the beloved owner of the los angeles clippers, as you know, was captured on tape saying very racist things to his girlfriend.

and now, as far as i can tell, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ "jimmy kimmel live" >> jimmy: welcome to the show. thank you for watching. thank you for joining us. i'd like to welcome you. don't be alarmed. we are very friendly. right, guillermo. we are very friendly, right? >> guillermo: right, jimmy. >> jimmy: let me ask. who do you think who works at the show is the most friendly person on the staff? >> guillermo: cleto sr. >> jimmy: cleto sr. >> jimmy: i would have to agree. cleto sr. who is the least friendly person on the staff, would you say? >> guillermo: brad, i don't remember his last name. brad. >> jimmy: brad. he is? >> guillermo: yes. >> jimmy: wow. this morning, "time" magazine, every year, right after people releases its 50 most beautiful people issue, time releases its list of the 100 most influential people. usually i make both lists. but this year, i didn't even -- get on one. the people who did make this year's most influential, kerry washington, hillary clinton, pope francis, vladamir putin, pharell williams, and quiona, i d

my wife is expecting and jadeveon clowney kimmel, boy or girl, is our top choice. you know, mothers bay is on sunday. guillermo, did you get your mother something for mother's day, did you get her a gift? >> no, not yet. >> what about your mother-in-law, will you get her a gift? >> never. >> jimmy: never. in a way you are her gift, you know? >> guillermo: unfortunately. >> jimmy: unfortunately. without mothers, well, we wouldn't be here so be sure to thank your mom on sunday. unless your life is bad, in that case take the opportunity to blame her for putting you on this godforsaken earth. since it is mother's day sunday we thought it would be appropriate to shine a spotlight on a celebrity mom. from time to time we ask the moms of famous rappers to read the lyrics of their favorite songs. and it's fun. tonight yg was kind enough to lend us husband mom to recite the lyrics of "toot it and boot it." >> i'm mama yg and this is from "toot it and boot it." i met her in the club and i say what's up, i took her to the crib and you know i [ bleep ]. yeah toot it and boot i

. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- adam sandler. from "maleficent", elle fanning. celebrities read mean tweets. and music from lykke li. and now, why wait, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> matt: hi, there. welcome. i'm jimmy, host of the show. thank you for watching. [ cheers and applause ] >> jim

and now, once and for all, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much. thank you for watching. thank you for being here. it's tuesday to end all tuesdays. [ cheers and applause ]

up >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- jesse tyler ferguson and eric stonestreet. robin roberts. and music from circa zero. with cleto and the cletones. and now, as a matter of fact, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome. thank you for watching. thank you for coming to join us here.

and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you. my name is jimmy.'m the host of the show. thank you for watching. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for coming to our studios here in hollywood.

next newscast is at 4:30 tomorrow morning. >> but writ now on jimmy kimmel actress sandra o.t's next. actress sandra o. that's next. we appreciate your time. ♪ ♪ >> all right. this is scary. the bottle of red wine you are drinking, maybe right now, by the way, may not be what you are thinking. >> depending on where they are watching it could be right now. police in italy confiscated tens of thousands of bottles of counterfeit premium wine. many of which were heading to stores in the united states. here's abc's nick watt. >> reporter: the tip off came from discerning drinkers who realized the expensive wine they were sipping was not the real deal. police swooped seizing 30,000 bottles. of counterfeit wines. worthless wine with a fancy, fake label. >> reporter: the problem is most of us, including me, can't tell the difference. between one wine or the other. we are ripe for the fooling. >> unfortunately, the average american, if you are just going out to a grocery store, i can't guarantee you are not going to get what you are looking for and you might be getting something

. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- kathy griffin. from "veep", tony hale. and music from franz ferdinand. with cleto and the cletones. and now, just in the nick of time, here's jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: thank you. hi, everybody. i'm jimmy. welcome to the show. thank you for watching. thank

and now moving right long, here's jimmy kimmel!

. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- emily blunt, from "shark tank", daymond john, and music from the birds of satan. with cleto and the cletones. and now, fasten your safety belts, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ ♪ [ applause ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hello. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for being here tonight.

. >> have a good mother's day >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"!ht -- jennifer lopez. from "mad men", elisabeth moss. and music from sleepy man banjo boys. with cleto and the cletones. and now, from now on, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ]

and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you for watching. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much for coming from wherever you were. and joining us here in beautiful hollywood. i assume tickets for the wax museum were sold out? we have a lot to cover tonight. and an historic night of television on this network as mitch and cam from "modern family" tied the knot. there has not been this much hype about a gay wedding on abc since every season of "the bachel bachelor." [ applause ] it is kind of, kind of a big deal. two male characters, main characters get married, especially on a family sitcom. i think the last time that happened was, well, i guess it wasn't a sitcom, but bo and luke duke from "dukes of hazard." the actors who play cam and mitch have kind of become spokespeople for the same-sex marriage movement which is kind of money because eric sto stonestreet isn't gay, just curious. a straight gift. the character he plays, though a tv show are positive role models f

and now, just in the nick of time, here's jimmy kimmel!heers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you. hi, everybody. i'm jimmy. welcome to the show. thank you for watching. thank

and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you for watching. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much for coming from wherever

that but first here's jimmy kimmel tape. a gander after the news. situation where the president yells at you. >> oh, yes. >> really. >> did. has he ever brought to you tears? you tears? >> close >> plane from sfo with a close call with another plane last month in new jersey more danger than originally thought. newly released preliminary report the ntsb class fay the incident as near mid-air collision. on april 24 united airlines flight from san francisco was trying to land at newark liberty airport with 161 people on board. the report says it came within 400 feet above and 200 feet to the side of an express jet flight. sfo flight was ordered to abort the dissent. investigators are still trying to determine who was at fault for the near crash. >> hero dog in oakland helped chp officers arrest suspected auto they have today. when the man ditched the cary tried to run through the yard but the dog wasn't having it. the dog corner the suspect until police arrested him. >> firefighters in the marin county community of marin wood came one a creative way to