oh... really koshka?time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ pizza hut just made their biggest menu change ever, so were in italy to get the opinions of the experts. so argentina, are you ready to change pizza? no! they've redefined pizza with six bold sauces and ten new crust flavors. this not pizza! it's pretty cool that there are over twenty new ingredients, right franco? too many. oh do you like the salted pretzel crust? it's good! i know! oh! get a pair of pizzas, a new one or an old favorite, for six ninety-nine each. the flavor of now menu. get it at pizza hut dot com. ♪ ♪ [laughter] ♪ >> jon: welcome back. as you know. china, china is a land of great complexity from civil right issues to wildlife. now the peoples republic is tackling what maybe the most pressing problem. >> the government's media watchdog has launched a crack down on puns. >> jon: the great chairman says all meetings must be literal and single. no puns.

oh... really koshka?e journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ who convinced you to follow your dreams with one cross country roadtrip?d you give someone the greatest gift for someone who gave you these moments... is to give those moments back. dewar's. the most awarded blended scotch in history. >> stephen. >wake up.stephen, you gotta wak. it's time. >> stephen: oh. oh, thanks. oh, oh, well, folks, we've finally come to the end of the the "colbert report." nine great years, 14,047 wonderful episodes. i just have too many people to thank. first and foremost, everybody who worked so hard every day to make something special. all of our friends and families for putting up with our long hours. the network for giving us the chance to begin with. ( applause ) and, of course, all the guests who came on, thousands of them. there are just too many to thank, so, you know, what? i'll just thank may haveis staple. may haveis, if you could just call everybody tomorrow, that would be gr

oh... really koshka? you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ just take a closer look. it works how you want to work. with a fidelity investment professional... or managing your investments on your own. helping you find new ways to plan for retirement. and save on taxes where you can. so you can invest in the life that you want today. tap into the full power of your fidelity greenline. call or come in today for a free one-on-one review. is the gum you love without a wrapper.pped welcome to the easy life. ♪ trident unwrapped. super useful. helps fight cavities. (cheers and applause) >> jon: welcome back. my guests tonight, a former deputy national security advisor and an academy award winning director. they are here to discuss a p.s.a. called "last days." ♪ (siren) (screeching) (roaring) (bird sounds) >> jon: please welcome to the program kathryn bigelow and juan zarate! hello! (cheers and applause) ♪ have a seat! thank you for being

oh... really koshka? you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ ♪ they're jamming in the street ♪ ♪ ♪ all night long ♪ all night ♪ bud light lime cran-brrr-rita fiesta forever pizza hut just made their biggest menu change ever, so were in italy to get the opinions of the experts. so argentina, are you ready to change pizza? no! they've redefined pizza with six bold sauces and ten new crust flavors. this not pizza! it's pretty cool that there are over twenty new ingredients, right franco? too many. oh do you like the salted pretzel crust? it's good! i know! oh! get a pair of pizzas, a new one or an old favorite, for six ninety-nine each. the flavor of now menu. get it at pizza hut dot com. >> stephen: welcome back, everybody, pie guest tonight need those introduction. so i won't. senator, thank you so much. senator john mccain, what a pleasure to have you on, thanks for coming here for one of my last 12 show, it's an honor. >> we're sc

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oh... really koshka?the time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ what happened? did they get him? [remote chime] ...gotta go...let's go... ♪ [berenson] yeah... we're almost at the pickup. i'll call when they're in the air. pizza hut's new menu has six bold sauces. one sauce. marinara. yeah, our marinara is classic, but the other sauces take pizza where it's never been before. there's honey sriracha, why don't you try the buffalo sauce? no ok, how about premium crushed tomato? one sauce yeah actually, there's six. marinara classic marinara, plus our other five other sauces. marinara! alright fine. get a pair of pizzas, a new one or an old favorite for six ninety nine each. the flavor of now menu. get it at pizza hut dot com. ♪ they're jamming in the street ♪ ♪ ♪ all night long ♪ all night ♪ bud light lime cran-brrr-rita fiesta forever jo welcome the front man of foo fighters. "foo fighters, sonic hoys." >> i looked at my intervi

oh... really koshka?e time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ who convinced you to follow your dreams with one cross country roadtrip?d you give someone the greatest gift for someone who gave you these moments... is to give those moments back. dewar's. the most awarded blended scotch in history. ( cheers and applause ). >> stephen: thanks very much. welcome back everybody my guest tonight has claws like spears. a tail like a thunder back in a moment, wings like a hurricane, and breath like death, please welcome the last great fire drake of the third age, smaug! ( cheers and applause ) now, smaug, where's the dragon? smaug, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) i want you to know they am not intimidated by you, even though you have a reputation as a tough interview because you often eat the host. >> i eat a lot of things, stephen. but you needn't worry. you're my last interview of the day. i've already filled up on the few. >> ste

oh... really koshka?k on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ miller invented lite beer, and that changed everything. great taste deserved great packaging, which led to new packaging, improved packaging, and ultimately, too many improvements. which led us back to our original look. miller lite we invented lite beer, you're welcome. ♪ ♪ ♪ if every driver in the u.s. kept here's a qtheir car's you: tires properly inflated, how many gallons of fuel could america save each year? up to 2 billion gallons? 4 billion? 6 billion? the answer is... up to 4 billion gallons. by keeping your tires properly inflated, you can increase your car's fuel economy and reduce its co2 emissions. take the energy quiz -- round 2. energy lives here. >> jon: your moment of zen! now attorney general eric holder is launching another federal probe. does he have a case in the death of eric garner? >>> bad optics for hillary clinton speaking to what looks clinton speaking

oh... really koshka?ike the time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ waiter: yep. new gingerbread french toast and pumpkin pancakes. but they're only around for a limited time. girl: can i still get it if i'm on the naughty list? waiter, chuckling: i think you'll be fine. [bell rings] waitress: welcome to denny's! ♪ ♪ now through christmas eve, get 30 percent off hundreds of gifts. at zales. pizza hut just made their biggest menu change ever, so were in italy to get the opinions of the experts. so argentina, are you ready to change pizza? no! they've redefined pizza with six bold sauces and ten new crust flavors. this not pizza! it's pretty cool that there are over twenty new ingredients, right franco? too many. oh do you like the salted pretzel crust? it's good! i know! oh! get a pair of pizzas, a new one or an old favorite, for six ninety-nine each. the flavor of now menu. get it at pizza hut dot com. [cheers and applause] >>

oh... really koshka? you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ can i pet your cloud please? sure! [ rumbling ] woah! aah! he doesn't like to be touched there. mmm! [ male announcer ] pet the rainbow! taste the rainbow. [ male announcer ] pet the rainbow! we saw him holding a bud light, which means he's up for whatever happens... ...in this case, jimmy johnson. i, jimmy johnson, challenge you to a little football game. don't get nervous. are we ready?! yeeaaah! i'm ready. jimmy johnson has dominated the electric football circuit. yeah! look at the little jimmy run! he's hurt! he's pushing through, he's pushing through. oh, wait a minute, wait a minute! bud light. the perfect beer for whatever happens. >> jon: hey, that's our show. before we go i want to tell you something really quick. before we go you may of seen we talking to sophie delaunay and thought, man, i wish jon stewart would interview me. i will never be part of a global ch

oh... really koshka?trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ you don't need to think about the energy that makes our lives possible. because we do. we're exxonmobil and powering the world responsibly is our job. because boiling an egg... isn't as simple as just boiling an egg. life takes energy. energy lives here. ♪ ♪ [laughter] ♪ ( cheers and applause ). >> jon: welcome back. my guest tonight, the best. his new film he wrote, directed and stars in is called "top five." >> look who's talking. hide the crack. >> hey, home boy, that was unnecessary, man. that was the 80s. either you was using or-- either way you got swept up in it. >> i didn't mention the five grand you owe me. >> you know what? you have to have an income before you get a check. you can't tax zero. >> allergic to jobs. pee takes job benadryl. when he feel a job coming ohe just take a benadryl. >> jon: please welcome back to the program, chris rock. ( cheers and applause ) really? really? really? really? i didn't know you had that. i

oh... really koshka?ike the time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ it has some pretty crazy moves. and these are some of the biggest vine, instagram, and youtube stars on the web. bring them all together with one of the hottest artists in the world... and you create a music video like never before. now that's how you bend the rules. introducing the next generation hp x360. ♪ ah, ♪ h it. ♪ push it. ♪ p...push it real good! ♪ ♪ ow! ♪ oooh baby baby...baby baby. if you're salt-n-pepa, you tell people to push it. ♪ push it real good. it's what you do. ♪ ah. push it. if you want to save fifteen percent or more on car insurance, you switch to geico. it's what you do. ♪ ah. push it. i'm pushing. i'm pushing it real good! ( cheers and applause ). >> stephen: welcome back, everybody. thanks so much. thanks so much, everybody. folks, the holiday season is here, and whether you celebrate christmas, hanukkah, kwanzaa, or let's be serious

oh... really koshka?ike the time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ ♪ only at zales, the diamond store. ♪ they say back in the day... professional athletes didn't play for the money. nor did they play for fame. they played for the love of the game. i'm here to say... some things haven't changed. ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: welcome back. you know, obviously, the holidays are here. it's the christmas season. but sadly, some are not so jolly this year, including those whose very job it is to be jolly. jordan clepper has more. >> this past saturday, the streets of new york echoed with voices raised against injustice. and civil rights attorney norman seagal thinks they have a right to be heard. >> even if you disagree with the content of the message of a group, they have the right to express that viewpoint. >> so he stood with them-- no, not that them. this them. holy ( bleep ). with santas. >> you can't ban people from walking

oh... really koshka?the time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ (cheers and applause) >> stephen: we're back with the president of the united states! president barack hussein obama! mr. president, thank you for being here. it's very exciting. you and i don't always see eye to eye on things -- >> i'm glad about that, by the way. >> stephen: you're glad we don't see eye to eye? >> yes, i would be worried if i saw eye to eye with you. >> stephen: i would like to look in your eyes but i'm only about 5'10 1/2". (laughter) it's exciting to say the words president of the united states. do you ever get excited when you hear the words president barack obama? >> no. (laughter) >> stephen: do you like the job? >> i love the job. (cheers and applause) it's an incredible privilege, but when you're in it, you're not thinking about it in terms of titles, you're thinking about how do you deliver for the american people, and also when i go hom

oh... really koshka?e time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ get to the terminal across town. are all the green lights you? no. it's called grid iq. the 4:51 is leaving at 4:51. ♪ they cut the power. it'll fix itself. power's back on. quick thinking traffic lights and self correcting power grids make the world predictable. thrillingly predictable. waiter: yep. new gingerbread french toast and pumpkin pancakes. but they're only around for a limited time. girl: can i still get it if i'm on the naughty list? waiter, chuckling: i think you'll be fine. [bell rings] waitress: welcome to denny's! what you're doing now, janice. blogging. your blog is just pictures of you in the mirror. it's called a fashion blog, todd. well, i've been helping people save money with progressive's discounts. flo, can you get janice a job? [ laughs ] you should've stuck to softball! i was so much better at softball than janice, dad. where's your wife, t

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oh... really koshka?e the time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ [ male announcer ] they'll see you before you see them. cops are cracking down on drinking and driving. drive sober, or get pulled over. cops are cracking down on drinking and driving. get to the terminal across town. are all the green lights you? no. it's called grid iq. the 4:51 is leaving at 4:51. ♪ they cut the power. it'll fix itself. power's back on. quick thinking traffic lights and self correcting power grids make the world predictable. thrillingly predictable. as strongbow hard cider, better. but strongbow over ice is the best. enjoying strongbow over ice with your slow motion horse, the bestest. ♪ strongbow, world's number one hard cider. ♪we♪fa la la la la.ies today ♪come on everybody say... ♪fa la la la. [cheers and applause] >> jon: welcome back. tonight my guest, legends. "new hopes for the future" on a new game called "destiny" ♪ we will bui

oh... really koshka?ike the time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ quality.... uncompromising.... unchanging.... it's our golden rule. and apparently others agree. you don't need to think that makes our lives possible. because we do. we're exxonmobil... and powering the world responsibly is our job. because boiling an egg... isn't as simple as just boiling an egg. life takes energy. energy lives here. i love thit's siracha.i burger. sluracha? no. si-rah-chah. siriracha. no. watch how i say it. si-rah-cha. that's not helping. bam! that's jack's new spicy sriracha burger comin' in all hot and melty with jalapeños and bacon! but the best part? it's not just sriracha sauce, it's creamy sri-rah... slur-rah cha... whatever it's called, it's awesome sauce. >> jon: hey, welcome back! you know, we americans -- we americans give to charity for many reasons. to help the needy. further a good cause. some corporations have found other rea

oh... really koshka?ike the time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ ♪ let's spark the fire. use your mastercard with apple pay okay handbag out there...surprise!! and you could get a priceless surprise. woah!! who's next? four!! from golf experiences to concert tickets. ♪ so much cooler when you do it do it do it. ♪ ♪ let's spark the fire. even the chance to meet gwen stefani. ♪ let's spark the fire. cool hair ah! haha priceless. ♪ everybody let's go! who convinced you to follow your dreams with one cross country roadtrip?d you give someone the greatest gift for someone who gave you these moments... is to give those moments back. dewar's. the most awarded blended scotch in history. it has some pretty crazy moves. and these are some of the biggest vine, instagram, and youtube stars on the web. bring them all together with one of the hottest artists in the world... and you create a music video like never before. now that's how y

oh... really koshka?e time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ >> at least 21 women have now gone public claiming to have been sexual assaulted by bill cosby. among them, former super model janice dickonson. i visited her in beverly hills this week and she told me about the alleged rape, the fall out and what she hopes will happen next. some of what you will about to hear is graphic. >> what has held you back all of these years from telling the story in detail until now? >> i remember being humiliated, disgusted. i had revulsion towards cosby. cosby was a very powerful man and probably still is. i trusted this man and i stuffed it. i compartmentalized it because i was embarrassed. i was -- i was it wasn't until it came out recently that other women told the same story that had happened to me that i believed these women. >> you were 27 and he was roughly about 45 years old at the time? >> i don't remember how oldthat monster was

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oh... really koshka?bring that up! ♪ transferred money from hisy bank of america savings account to his merrill edge retirement account. before he opened his first hot chocolate stand calling winter an "underserved season". and before he quit his friend's leaf-raking business for "not offering a 401k." larry knew the importance of preparing for retirement. that's why when the time came he counted on merrill edge to streamline his investing and help him plan for the road ahead. that's the power of streamlined connections. that's merrill edge and bank of america. waiter: yep. new gingerbread french toast and pumpkin pancakes. but they're only around for a limited time. girl: can i still get it if i'm on the naughty list? waiter, chuckling: i think you'll be fine. [bell rings] waitress: welcome to denny's! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guest, oh, he's fantastic. he made his american tv debut on our "late night" show back in january. and since then, he's become one of the most celebrated new ar

oh... really koshka?e the time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ >>> part two on armed security guards. people hired to protect in some cases end up killing. private arm security guards. shopping malls, security events just like the police and most of them do a very important job and risk their lives at times. but unlike the police, their training and government oversight is spotty at best depending where they work. the senate investigative reporting, we look what happens when poor oversight does lead to tragedy. here's senior correspondent. >> reporter: this is former security guard taking a smoking break outside of the private security company where he works in suburban phoenix. 5.5 years ago, he was armed and licensed to carry by arizona's department of public safety. that turned out to be a dangerous breakdown in the system. an investigation by cnn and the center for investigative reporting found licensing requirements so

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oh... really koshka?ike the time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ >> brian: we welcome you back from oakland and right now for the buffalo bills and their offense. second down. with time jackson out there but he is going for the end zone and it's caught. touchdown, woods! robert woods. springs free in the end zone. a 30-yard strike from kyle orton, and the bills still breathing here with a minute nine remaining. >> well, so often in these situations, offensive linemen out of breath and not able to rush the passer with quite the same aggression as earlier in the game and great by robert to make himself available. d.j. falls down. woods, another one of these young skill guys that makes this bills future look so good. woods, watkins, c.j. spiller. chris hogan. a lot of good players on this bills offense. >> how about orton today? but that drive took 46 seconds, four plays. buffalo goes down, scores a touchdown. referee: third a

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oh... really koshka? on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ >>> good morning. i'm carol costello, thank you so much for joining me. comedian bill cosby is getting hit with a new lawsuit by one of his accusers. ta mara breen claims cosby drugged and sexually assaulted her back in 1970. cosby has denied her claims. now she is taking the case to federal court and trying to get around the statute of limitations in her case. her goal, to prove that cosby's repeated denials have damaged her image. so far, at least 22 alleged victims have come forward. let's bring in cnn national correspondent susan candiotti with more. >> this someone really a different one, carol. ta mara green's lawyers thinks he has found a way to file a lawsuit that will force bill cosby to public address sex assault allegations. miss green says she hopes it will work. ta mara green finding a creative way to get around the statute of limitations, largely shielding bill cosby

oh... really koshka? you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ >>> north korea's cyber attack, race relations in this country, and opening relation with cube wra. president obama talked about them all with chief political correspondent and anchor of state of the union candy rowley. he had a lot to say regarding his reaction of sewn where i disagreeing with him when he said that sony made a mistake cancelling its release of "the interview" movie after a cyber attack and more threats from north korea. >> i was pretty sympathetic to the fact that they have business considerations they have to make, and, you know, had they talked to me directly about this decision i might have called the m theater chains and distributors and asked them what the story was, but what i was laying out was a principle that i think this country has to abide by. we believe in free speech. we believe in the right of artistic expression and satire and things that

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oh... really koshka?ike the time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ >>> breaking news. we're receiving word of a possible hostage situation in sydney. you're going to look at video. take a look at that video now. everything looks normal. this is from moments ago outside of a lindt chocolate shop in marketplace, pedestrian mall, inside sydney's business district. there's very little information at this time including how many hos statages there may be or ho many people are holding them. if this is indeed a hostage situation. we can tell you the new south wales police unit, their media unit tells cnn, "all we can confirm at this time is that there is a police operation taking place. we are recommending that no one go near the area as we're trying to establish exactly what is happening." what we do know also our affilia affiliate, news 7, reports that two gunmen are at the scene. we at cnn can't independently confirm that. we'll

oh... really koshka?e time you took on adagio with nothing but some journey boots and a scout trap? i knew you were going to bring that up! ♪ >>> time now for "the ridiculist." and tonight with the tale of two political operative, one democrat, and one republican who are brothers. brad and dallas woodhouse were on c-span and the mood at least was at the beginning jocular. >> i had no idea he would be a right wing republican nut. >> i don't know about that. i think my brother grew up left and comes here, once you come up to washington, your brain gets poisoned as we see constantly as people who come up here. >> so the brothers are promoting a documentary called "woodhouse divided" looking at both poignant and political dynamics. since they're brothering and virtually agree on nothing politically, their c-span appearance evolved into this. >> the republicans ran on nothing, ran just on anti-obama. so i -- >> what did the democrats run on? what did your candidates run on? >> i'm talking about -- >> what did