la la land, madness. >> one of them was announced as the winner. moonlight actually won. >> they announced la, and no one knew what was happening. i remember turning to my mom and saying mom, fix your face. there is cameras on us and crazy things are happening on stage. >> jimmy: right, right. now let's look at the still photograph. this is the moment when everybody kind of figured out what was going on. so zoom in to meryl streep there. >> i heard she was nominated for an oscar for her performance in this. audience. >> jimmy: then you have ben affleck there. it looks like he stepped on a lego in bare feet. then you got matt damon, he only thinks about himself. so he is laughing. and let's slide over to the side there. dwayne johnson is laughing. >> he's in full "you're welcome" mode. >> jimmy: that's right. finally, the person who seems to be suffering the most is you. >> i felt so badly. i thought my mom -- you can see a sliver of my mom's face right next to me. >> jimmy: and circle my dad, that's my dad's bored face. >> i was feeling a lot of pain. i was way worse. >> jimmy: so they are co

you remember la-la land, the mistake a few years ago. everyone is going to remember chris rock getting slapped by will smith. >> final question. will smith is savvy. you know that, will smith is smart. what does he do to make things better? >> yeah, well, he has taken a couple steps. i think today's instagram post went a long way by apologizing both to chris rock and the academy and also the williams sisters and family and the cast and the crew of "king richard." and so i think that's as much as he can do. i think for the next couple of years at least he'll do whatever the academy wants him to do. the academy said today that it is investigating. what to could do is disinvite him to next year's oscars. worse than that, it could considerably take back the academy award. but right now i don't think anyone thinks that's going to happen. worst case, it could also abandon him like harvey weinstein from the academy. but i don't think his offense is viewed as that egregious. >> and i think it will be fascinating to see chris rock's reaction to t

they spent the better part of last year if in that la land -- la la land thinking that inflation was transitory. they've got a rude awakening right now because it's not just inflation at the gas pump, we have to keep in mind this war on natural gas, people who want to ban natural gas don't realize natural gas is -- you cannot have farmers without natural gas. it's a a key feed stock into ammonia nitrate which is fertilizer which now prices of fertilizer have been driven so high that farmers are putting fewer seed into the ground, so our crop yields are going to be lower come the end of the year. so we're looking at a inflation not just at the gas pump, but at the grocery counter. now when you look at all these rate hikes, i think it's clear being late to the game that the fed is going to set a recession to kind of combat this commodity inflation. so to answer your question, no, i don't think the economy can handle accommodation of potentially $150 oil which i think the odds are by summer a 25% probability. lauren: goldman sachs sees it at 165, so they're upping you there, stephen. yo

this rivals the la la land wrong envelope moment is perhaps one of the times of all oscars —— denouementhought was we were promised a more edgy ceremony and perhaps they had just gone to these extra length to provide an edgy moment but then, i think as you said, david, the expletives and the swearing and the extent to which this situation went on makes me at least believe that it probably wasn't stage. it's been some huge misjudgement by chris rock. i don't know what you think but in terms of the comedy, it eventually wasn't funny? in comedy, it eventually wasn't funn ? . , , comedy, it eventually wasn't funn ? . , ., �* funny? in many ways, we don't know what _ funny? in many ways, we don't know what happened, - funny? in many ways, we don't know what happened, there's l funny? in many ways, we don'tj know what happened, there's a lot of— know what happened, there's a lot of conjecture right now, but i — lot of conjecture right now, but i think it was a real event _ but i think it was a real event. and in many ways, i feel sad about— event. and in many ways, i feel sad about it _ event.

moonlight doing it to la la land. spotlight doing it before. it is a last week thing that happens.ens-— it is a last week thing that happens. it is a last week thing that hauens. �* . ,. .,, happens. the best picture category has a different _ happens. the best picture category has a different voting _ happens. the best picture category has a different voting system - happens. the best picture category has a different voting system to - happens. the best picture category| has a different voting system to the other categories. is it first preference, second preference? so if codais preference, second preference? so if coda is everybody�*s second or third favourite film, it builds up a head of steam. the feeling it is about family, difficult times in ukraine, people wanted something life affirming and positive. i people wanted something life affirming and positive. i watched it with my children, _ affirming and positive. i watched it with my children, they _ affirming and positive. i watched it with my children, they were - affirming and positive. i watched it with my children, they

la la land," i was onstage and i wasn't sure of what to do. but denzel washington was in the front and he told me to give the microphone to barry jenkins, which i did. and once again, in times of trouble, there he was, the equalizer. >> in this business you got to be able to have people disrespecting you, and you got to smile and you got to pretend like that's okay. richard williams. thank you, d ryou, d. denzel washington said to me at your highest moment, be careful. that's when the devil comes for you. >> jimmy: that's how you talk after two years of shakespeare. you start saying -- imagine having that at the tip of your tongue! at your highest moment, that's when the devil comes for you. woody harrelson was like "noooo!" will smith ended his speech by saying he hopes the academy welcomes him back. and if they don't, he'll be waiting for them in the parking lot. the academy announced today that they are doing a "formal review" of the incident. and a spokesperson for the lapd put out a statement immediately following the altercation, that said, "we don't have any details about the incident. as soon as we do, we will make them available to the public." i think we have all the details. the lapd was watching -- "ncis" was on last night. what a crazy night. maybe they should do this at every awards show. "still to come, the grammy for record of the year, and, who will dua lipa physically assault?" bruno mars or olivia rodrigo? find out next on the 64th annual grammy awards!" after the show, a somber will and jada went home to reflect and, oh no, wait, he got jiggy with it. really, really jiggy. chris rock went to a party after the show too. i don't know. i wonder how this all shakes out? will released a heartfelt apology just a little while ago. he wrote, "violence in all of its forms is poisonous and destructve. my behavior at last night's academy awards was unacceptable and inexcusable. jokes at my expense are a part of the job, but a joke about jada's medical condition was too much for me to bear and i reacted emotionally. i would like to publicly apologize to you, chris. i was out of line and i was wrong. i am embarrassed and my actions were not indicative of the man i want to be. there is no place for violence in a world of love and kindness." he went on to apologize to the williams family and the academy. and write, "i am a work in progress." sincerely, will." that's good. i'm glad he did that. to me, there's only one more step to make this right, the comedy central roast of will smith, hosted by chris rock! right? i mean -- i hope they at least get together and have a red table talk or something, because it's a bummer. these are all very kind people. and also, it took focus away from the hosts amy schumer, wanda sykes, and regina hall, who worked hard on this show and were very follow-up funny during the show. and it also distracted us from from guillermo who was at the red carpet last night. every year we send guillermo to the red carpet. boy, this was a good year for yu? >> guillermo: yeah, it was. >> jimmy: it was like people had been pent up, waiting to see you again. >> guillermo: everybody was so happy. >> jimmy: everybody was so happy, before the show on the red carpet with guillermo. ♪ >> guillermo: how are you? timly charle, romy, lupita, look, we match. how are you? can i have one question? yeah, come here. one question. come on, lupita. billy, billy, i got one question for you. only one. oh, i got to do live with kelly. [ bleep ] everybody is blowing me off tonight. it's hard this year at the oscars. nicole, nicole, how are you? hi, how are you doing? >> good to see you. >> guillermo: hold on. hold on. wait, you're too hot! how are you doing? hey, will! >> we love you, and tell jimmy we love him too. >> guillermo: guess what i'm wearing? >> what are you wearing? >> guillermo: spanks! can you do me a favor? can you seen my vaccine card right here? i'm getting autograph. >> there you go. >> guillermo: right there! >> that's the first time anybody has asked me to sign their vaccine card. >> guillermo: so i'm the first one? >> you are the first. >> guillermo: listen, i want to ask the question from sombrero awkward questions. >> an awkward question. i would expect nothing less. >> guillermo: all right. >> w >> want the say hello to the person that you lost your virginity to? yes, i do. i don't have to say the name? >> guillermo: only if you want to. >> they know who they are. and guess who's sorry now! >> what do you smell like? soup. i think i smell like soup. >> guillermo: soup? >> like chicken noodle soup. i'll give you my spanx after the show. you'll understand. >> guillermo: i have a question. from the sombrero awkward question. and read to it the camera. another one. another one. >> i can't. >> guillermo: sorry, sorry. you don't know how to read! khalid doesn't know thou read. >> can you do any celebrity impressions? >> guillermo: let's see them. >> this is my sam jackson >> guillermo: okay. >> who the [ bleep ] put these [ bleep ] snakes on this mother [ bleep ] plane! >> guillermo: wow, that was something. >> if there was a porno version of your movie, what would it be called? the movie is called "king richard". >> guillermo: fantastic! [ laughter ] i don't get the joke. he say what? to say hello to the person you lost your virginity to. >> lost my virginity too? >> guillermo: yeah. >> long dead. >> guillermo: you look amazing. you look great. >> well, i'm glad i chose the coat i chose because we would have looked like twins. >> guillermo: you're in the french dispatch, in that movie? do you like french toast? >> it's a great story. do you know the story of french toast? do we have time for this? there is a little kid and his father said you're getting nothing but bread and water. but the people like the house maids in the house decided -- or stale bread and water. they decided they would bathe the stale toast in milk and eggs and sugar and cinnamon, and they made him french toast.pand that. >> guillermo: oh, wow. ♪ listen, you just won the guillermo award. billest. last year i learned the sign of fart. can you teach me all this? >> it's like at home. you catch it. >> guillermo: this year i learned the what? [ bleep ] [ bleep ]. >> guillermo: so you go like this and drop it and you go like this. >> let me show you something. you have to eat it actually. you have to eat it. >> guillermo: i'm doing a movie about myself. >> you are? >>. >> guillermo: so i'm the writer, producer, director. >> okay. >> guillermo: and i want you to audition for my movie. >> okay. >> guillermo: action! >> oh, guillermo, that was amazing. you have ruined sex with me. you have ruined sex with anyone else for me. you know what is really great about this line? >> guillermo: yeah? >> i'm queer. you're welcome. >> guillermo: you're going to play my father. >> i'm going play your father? >> guillermo: yeah. >> this is ridiculous. guillermo, don't run into that burning orphanage, it's too dangerous, and you've already saved so many of them. >> guillermo: wow, that was perfect. >> i'm not drunk. the world is drunk. >> guillermo: wow! hold it. >> it's not just a mustache. it's my identity. it's who i am. it's my superpower. without it, i am nothing. was that good? >> guillermo: wow, that's very good. >> this is the worst script i've ever read. >> guillermo: thank you. >> guillermo, as your doctor, it's my responsibility to tell you have a medically perfect penis. >> guillermo: wow, that was amazing! >> but it smem smells funny. >> did you see that too? >> no. >> guillermo: can you improvise a kiss now? >> you want a kiss? >> guillermo: yeah. >> okay, come here. [ applause ] >> guillermo: oh my god, look, i got to give you, this is a guillermo. >> oh, thank you. >> guillermo: most sexia. >> thank you. i'm keeping this. i'm putting it on my trophy case. >> guillermo: you promise? all right. thank you very much. oh, my gosh, that was amazing yeah! denzel, denzel! denzel, come on! denzel [ bleep ] me again. denzel blow me up again. that was not good the first thing i say that. all right. i'm so excited because of tiffany haddish. i did not say that sound bite. [ bleep ] i say this. blow me off. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: wow. you've done it again, guillermo. >> guillermo: thank you, everybody. thank you. >> jimmy: simone ashley is here. we have music from del amitri. we'll be right back with david duchovny. >> abc's "jimmy kimmel live!" brought to you by consumer cellular. ♪ >> jimmy: hi ya. welcome back. tonight from "bridgerton" on netflix, simone ashley is with us. then later, this is their seventh studio album, it's called "fatal mistakes." and you can see them on tour tomorrow night at the roxy here in hollywood. one of my favorites, del amitri from the mercedes-benz stage. tomorrow night, oh, we have a good show tomorrow. donald glover and machine gun kelly will be with us. please join us for that. over the past three decades, our first guest has muldered and californicated the daylights out of us. now you can see him as part of an all-star cast in the first and hopefully last-ever movie about making a movie during covid that was made during covid. "the bubble" premieres friday on netflix. please welcome david duchovny. [ cheering and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: how you doing? it's great to see you. you look very youthful. i don't understand how it's happened, but it has. >> i don't know either. i really have nothing to say about it. i got a regimen. but it's secret. >> jimmy: did you watch the oscars last night as they happened? >> not as they happened, but i saw -- i saw the important bits. >> jimmy: have you ever personally been punch order punched a fellow performer? >> not a fellow performer. >> jimmy: no? but someone? >> someone, yeah. it should be like your guillermo with the oscar. if i want to say hello who i lost my virginity to, i can say whoever i punched. >> jimmy: you know what? i was thinking about you and you and garry shandling did a great bit when he hosted the emmys. >> yeah, it was the emmys, and i wasn't nominated that year. so i came back as the bathroom attendant. and gary comes in after the monologue. oh, hey, dave. nice to see you here. i go it's going really well, gary, going really well. >> jimmy: you guys have a great kind of chemistry. did you know gary before you were on the larry sanders show? >> no. no. i wanted to do that show so badly, and they got you on. oh, gary loves you, gary loves you. and i got there early to watch him work. and he walked by me a number of times. and it was clear he had no clue who i was. he loves you. he loves you. >> jimmy: so they lied to you. >> but it didn't matter. >> jimmy: but then he did actually come to love you. and in fact, there -- well, there was television love because one of the bits that you guys had going on was that there was -- you were sexually attracted to gary or larry. >> yeah. it was an odd kind of thought process where i had the man crush on him. but it was before man crush was kind of a term. and i'm in love with him, but it's not sexual. it's something beyond that. >> jimmy: yeah. and yet. >> it's hard to explain. >> jimmy: you say it wasn't sexual. but as i recall, there was a moment -- >> he was afraid it was sexual. >> jimmy: you were wearing a robe. >> i sharon stoned him. >> jimmy: you sharon stoned him. when you shot that -- >> was i stoned? >> jimmy: yeah. sharon stones. >> i was wearing -- no, i wasn't naked under there. i was wearing dark underwear so it looked like a shadow because i didn't want gary to get depressed. [ applause ] >> jimmy: gary will never get depressed. something to worry about. you have a bunch of things going on. you've written your fifth novella actually. what's the different between a novel and novel laouple of hundred pages. >> jimmy: okay. and what is the title of that? >> that's calls "the reservoir". >> jimmy: you've been writing a bunch of these now. >> i've written four novels, and that's the first novella. >> jimmy: and you are on the road currently with your band? >> no, but i did play a festival in florida in tampa last week. >> jimmy: i have a photograph of that. >> look at that. >> jimmy: there you are. >> i got to pull my pants up. they're not the same pants, by the way. a similar color. i'm in an orange burnt kind of a phase right now, rust. >> jimmy: only one outfit. it's very sad. who else -- >> i am wearing the same sneakers, though. [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: who is on the bill you with this? >> green day and incubus. it was outside the football stadium. they didn't let us in. >> jimmy: i see. >> green day and incubus, they played in the evening. i played at 7:30 in the morning. [ laughter ] >> thank you. [ applause ] >> jimmy: was there any crossover between you and green

. >> oh, yeah, it's right up there when a few years ago, the best picture winner was mixed up, "la la landng, it's on the front page. some people saying, look, will smith has a right to defend his wife. while others are saying, violence is never an option. others saying, violence is never an option. had it been a woman or a different situation, he would have been escorted out. so many people just happy for will smith, for him to win the best oscar option for his role in "king richard." it just overshadows the night. he can take a listen to his acceptance speech. >> i want to apologize to the academy. i want to apologize to all of my fellow nominees. art imitates life. i look like the crazy father, just like they said. i look like crazy father, just like they said about richard williams. but love will make you do crazy things. >> jada pinkett smith has been open about the fact tra she suffers from alopecia, that she shaved her head because of hair loss. but other people like judd apatow took to twitter and said, but this is the oscars. chris rock is a comedian. this is a night where you, yo

the only comparison i can find is when we saw la la land read out at the very end of an oscars ceremony

guardó en un lugar secreto que solo él conocía, todo para alejar los land grands de las personas equivocadas, pero no pasó tiempo antes que las decir dónde están los land grands, así que le pido que se retire, retírese. alejandro: matt kilroy buscó los papeles, pero nunca encontró los títulos. nadie lo hizo, la ubicación del escondite murió con ramírez. aún así los otros culparon a juan. porque sin evidencia que estas tierras les pertenecían, kilroy las reclamó a la fuerza, construyeron el pueblo kilroy justo sobre la tierra de los rancheros, los kilroy se convirtieron en dueños de todo, hicieron millones, así que las familias han tenido que rentar su propia tierra. hasta que de pronto hace seis meses, un milagro. josefa ramírez estaba trabajando en la tierra cuando encontró los títulos aún enterrados exactamente donde juan los escondió hace 166 años. josefa inmediatamente llamó al sheriff local y le dijo lo que había encontrado, por fin la tierra sería devuelta a la familia, pero no sabía que el sheriff estaba en el bolsillo de los kilroy, así que un hombre llamado rex visitó a josefa esa noche y robó los títulos. rex no es

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land is. >> again, two questions for you, contessa are you ready? >> i'm prepared. >> number one, can everybody confirm las vegas is going to have the water we need to make sure lashosting "worldwide exchange" at 2:00 in the morning from vegas, obviously not getting up, but just staying up for the groundbreaking. >> you know, i think we should probably plan on opening a vegas bureau there's been so much development. there's so much business interest, not just in gaming and entertainment. nevada is booming as you know in areas outside of what has traditionally been their stronghold, that leisure travel. the water is a big issue it's something that i just talked about with board member wynn resorts pat milroy who used to be on the water board in southern nevada. it's of dire concern, how you do keep doing it. one thing you see, a lot of the big casino resorts are leaning on water and how efficiently they're recycling the water that comes in it's a big deal and of utmost concern to the folks who live there. >> it is a big deal. i was being serious on this. but i will say this, contessa. i'm all in favor of the las vegas bureau, but it has to on after my houston bure