i met up with ben cohen and lewis moody, they were showing me pictures of them, we were in coffee shops like that. there's nothing there, it's just like it never happened. people say, "how do you feel," and stuff? i feel like a phoney. i've said to you a few times, haven't i? it annoys me a lot about myself, it brought so much to so many people. but i feel like i am rude to people because it'sjust like, no... i don't get any tingling, any happiness about it at all. does it, in a sense, make it seem like your entire rugby career was a waste of time? you can't remember it, and obviously we are making the linkage between what happened on the rugby field to you and what happened to your brain and the injuries that your brain has suffered. does the fact you can't even remember the greatest moment of your career must make it even harder to deal with what rugby did leave you with? people say, like, straight question, "would you do it again?" i wouldn't do it again. i don't understand the... i've said this, some lads saying, "oh, i'm devastated what i'm putting my family through, i can't believ

with ben cohen and lewis moody, they were showing me pictures, we were showing me pictures, we were inver happened. people say, how do you feel and stuff? i feel like a pony. i've said to you a few times, haven't i? it annoys me a lot about myself, it brought so much to so many people. —— i feel like a phoney. but i feel like i am rude to people because it's just like, like i am rude to people because it'sjust like, no... i don't get any tingling, any happiness about it at all. does it, in a sense, _ happiness about it at all. does it, in a sense, make _ happiness about it at all. does it, in a sense, make it - happiness about it at all. does it, in a sense, make it seem i it, in a sense, make it seem like your entire rugby career was a waste of time? you can't remember it, and obviously we are making the link between what happened on the rugby field to you and what happened to your brain and the injuries that your brain has suffered... the fact you can't even remember the greatest moment of your career must make it even harder to deal with what rugby did leave you with?— harder to dea