i had lillian ross who you know was under, lillian ross, the great writer of-- who was on the william shore new yorker for many years and was also, you know, his mistress for years and years and years. but sean was married so it was kind of the best kept secret in town that she was with sean. and lily and i had become close and she had asked me, you know, for my input to write this piece finally about the big love affair with sean. but it was an uncomfortable thing when the piece came in, that should i publish it in "the new yorker" or not. and i went back and forth. on one level it was an amazing literary scoop to have the piece and another it was distasteful to have it in sean's magazine that he would have hated it being there. finally i had lunch with si, i said si, this has really been troubling, my piece. i vus don't know. what do you think. and he paused and he said sometimes decisions that are very hard to take just shouldn't be taken. and you know what, i think about it often. i mean sometimes you worry and you worry and you think you know what, there is a liberation from this

i had lillian ross, who was also his mistress for years.t was the best kept secret in town that she was with sean. billy and i had become close. she asked me for input to write this piece about the great love affair with sean. i went back and forth. on one level, it is an amazing literary scoop. on the other hand, it being in sean's magazine, knowing he would hate it if i did. this is been troubling and i asked s.i., what do you think? he said sometimes decisions that are very hard to take should not be taken. [laughter] tina: i think about it often. charlie: you tell the story there was a time when you were doing something controversial. >> right off the bat i had an investigative he six weeks in and i did not know what to do. i had never been the editor of anything except for a high school newspaper. a high school newspaper called the smoke signal. i have this piece that was accusing everybody of everything and was well documented, well sourced, lawyers, checkers, all the things did new yorker has available to thank god, and i remember at