♪hot pockets♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ new lipton sparkling iced tea. ♪ refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubblesfety beeping audible safety beeping the nissan rogue with safety shield technologies. the only thing left to fear is you imagination. nissan. innovation that excites. ♪ ♪ ♪ get excited for the 1989 world tour with exclusive behind the scenes footage all of taylor swift's music videos interviews, and more. xfinity is the destination for all things taylor swift. >> that's our show. join us tomorrow at 11:00. but before we go a quick note -- we get a lot of questions here about the show. like how do you find all those clips? are you really that short? or what's that smell? we'll take the time to answer questions on the show here on the air, the ones you've always wanted to know about it. tweet it with #jonstewartsaskhole. really? that's what we're doing? they are leaving me with very little dignity. here it is. >> you got to say this is a tough day for rick santorum, campaigning in hamlin, iowa, population 300, and one person shows up at the event for rick santorum. he moves on to denniso

-(clicks) new lipton sparkling iced tea. ♪ refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles.? i, for me, i personally think that all the breakfast sandwiches are the same. but this is an a.m. crunchwrap. what really sets it off is i have a hashbrown in here. i'm c.j. and i'm a breakfast defector! ♪ [bong!] tadaaa! the nominees for best new artists are... blue razz, chocolate strawbs and cinna roll! and the winner is... (belches) blaaaaaaahhhh.... yeah. tadaaa! crazy good! (cheers and applause) >> jon: hey, that's our show! but before we go, we talked about it earlier, we have about 28 more shows left, we're winding this (bleep) down. i say respectfully. (audience reacts) we're getting a lot of questions from people, things about the show that they always wanted to

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aveeno® naturally beautiful results® new lipton sparkling iced tea. ♪ refreshing tea infused with lightdy, i think this is my grandson. [lip syncing] ♪little girl you look so lonesome oh my goodness. ♪i see you are feeling blue ♪come on over to my place ♪hey girl ♪we're having a party happy birthday, grandma! ♪we'll be swinging ♪dancing and singing ♪baby come on over tonight (applause) >> jon: that's it for us! larry wilmore the nightly show. did you have a good week off? >> yeah i kind of disconnected with my favorite tv show 19 years and counting, i love the duggars! they're so good! >> jon: i have some bad news. yeah i mean jon, it was just so nice to watch a show about a family with togetherness and good old fashioned values. you know, i hope nothing happens that makes me reconceptualize their closeness in isolation to something dangerous. >> jon: larry obviously, far be it from me to just -- >> yes? >> jon: -- ah... just enjoy your favorite show. >> thanks man. >> jon: larry wilmore, everybody! here's your moment zen. >> can't bring my pole to fees, mamamamam! i hate that song! >>

. ♪ new lipton sparkling iced tea. ♪ refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles. subaru forester. (dad) she's all yours. (vo) but you get to keep the memories. love. it's what makes a subaru a subaru. (applause) >> jon: welcome back! my guest tonight has a new movie out and his new book is called "gumption." welcome back to the program nick offerman! (cheers and applause) >> jon: gurchtion! "gumption"! this book, and i have read it -- >> that's a compliment. >> jon: -- includes profiles of individuals you admire. the writing is funny. also witty, you are bane in-- urbane insightful but the sentiment is sincere. it is a real pain to these individuals. no matter where i picked it up, i had to finish who you were talking about whether yoko ono or george sanders or -- >> thank you. that's my intention. it's supposed to play out like a mixed tape, where each band being roosevelt o'brian orca roll burnet you think oh, my god, i have to get the rest of their records. >> jon: when i was done with it, i called my old girlfriend from high school. >> that was not my intentio

new lipton sparkling iced tea. ♪ refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles.p. >> jon: welcome back kids. you know kids, a lot of feeling on how you should raise them, personally i say water twice a day an keep them ne'er the light. i think i'm confusing them with miracles. anyway jordan klepper files this report. >> children, they're everywhere. but are they safe? one quick look at the news proves they're at risk for almost everything. >> she might be surprised by what is growing inside your child's lunch box. >> that could actually harm them. >> have you ever looked or checked your child's credit report. >> a warning tonight if your children have blue eyes. >> a warning for you parents whose children eat canny. >> but even with all the things out there that can kill children, some people just don't get it. >> i think kids deserve to be outside. i think they can pay in the park with each other without us hovering. i think they can walk to school [bleep]. >> that's right author and world work club lenore has started something called the free range parenting mo

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new lipton sparkling iced tea. ♪ refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles.or a taste that lifts you up. ♪ hello, i'm here to talk to you on behalf of windex. recently we've noticed a series of advertisements created by these two birds, inviting you to stay away from the streak free shine of windex. their advertisements are false. sfx: squeaking from window cleaning clean glass is better than dirty glass. and to prove it, here's a real demo: here i can clearly see my hand and here i cannot. don't stand for dirty. sfx: glove removed from hand use windex. sc johnson, a family company. >>> the finger lakes region of upstate new york was karl karlsen's family home. and now he was back to stay. here in seneca county he would rebuild his life among the farms, the fields, the vineyards and old friends. does everyone in this area know the karlsen family? >> probably most of seneca county knows one or all of us. >> reporter: karl's wife was gone, but he still had his three little kids to think about. >> he went back to work at the stone quarry for a while. and he then

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new lipton sparkling iced tea. ♪ refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles.s you up. get ready to be obsessed. sweetarts soft and chewy ropes. with no artificial flavors or colors. new from sweetarts. wanna get roped in? breathtaking peppermint... rich dark chocolate... york peppermint pattie. get the sensation. >> jon: welcome back as we have seen last week very upsetting, the supreme court conservative wing there was one justice in the process seemed to not just disappoint but to actually -- >> scalia said we should really start calling this law scotuscare. >> the opinion showy profundities are often profoundly incoherent. >> the supreme court has descended to the mystical aphorisms of the fortune cookiest. >> calling the court's reasoning an durd-- absurd jiggery pokery and pure applesauce. (laughter) >> jon: you kiss your mother with that mouth? jiggery pokery applesauce? sir! let us not say things we can never take back. (laughter) or even understand. (laughter) it is so interesting. if you look in the old man dictionary that scalia is apparently using t

new lipton sparkling iced tea. ♪ refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles. taste that lifts you up. ♪ [people talking] e occupato questo posto? [kids talking] one hundred forty-four questions per day. bryce canyon is 29 minutes from your location. ♪ okay, what is this? it's chewy. really icy. wooh. that's intense! it just hits you. its gum. no. it's totally a mint! it's disappearing as i am chewing it. where did it go? it's not a gum. not a mint. it's a totally new cool. new ice breakers cool blasts. [cheers and applause] >> welcome back. now this this rachel dolezal situation has a huge response everywhere. i want to know how the black community feels about it. let's check in with our bet robin thede. robin, you're at headquarters? >> that's right larry. larry: which headquarters? >> black headquarters. larry: oh. >> i'm freaking out, larry this. is a major black security breach. [laughing] >> larry: ummm a black security breech? >> rachel dolezal cracked the holy grail of black secrets. black womens hair. >> larry: really, black womens hair. >> yes. it's e

new lipton sparkling iced tea. ♪ refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles.r a taste that lifts you up. >> welcome back. >> he doesn't want to accept that there is a channel that will criticize him. i realize that many people feel it's too much it's too much criticism. but really has fox news been proven wrong on every single subject. that's what the we wants you to believe that fox news just invents, you know stories and that's what >> larry: tonightly -- during a news broadcast, don lemon held up a sign with the "n" word on it. here's another "n" word for you, don. no!! (laughter) diddy is arrested reportedly for hitting someone with a kettle bell. (laughter) that's the first hit diddy's been a part of in 20 years. (laughter) (applause) and a california lawmaker says that abortions cause drought. that's ludacris, who also has more hits than diddy in the past 20 years. (laughter) this is "the nightly show"! let's do this! (cheers and applause) captioning sponsored by comedy central ♪ (cheers and applause) >> larry: thank you very much. welcome to "the nightl

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new lipton sparkling iced tea. ♪ refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles.ste that lifts you up. they call these sandwiches? this is a sandwich. introducing the new subway turkey italiano melt. tender oven-roasted turkey breast. robust genoa salami. smoky, spicy pepperoni. when these big 3 meet under a blanket of melty provolone with that tangy new subway vinaigrette... something delicious happens. only one place to get a fresh toasted sandwich this great on freshly baked bread. the new turkey italiano melt. only at subway. on his quest, jack searched the globe for a flavorful spice coveted by kings and sultans. at last, he found it. exotic black pepper. jack knew what he had to do. trade his most beloved possession. and that's how far jack went to bring you the black pepper cheeseburger. black pepper cheese and peppercorn mayo. the black pepper cheeseburger. taste it before it's gone. (cheers and applause) >> larry: welcome back. now as we all know election season continues to heat up so it is's time for a quick check-in with the unblackening roll it. >> th

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new lipton♪sparkling iced tea. refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles.s you up. ♪ [music] jackie's heart attack didn't come with a warning. today her doctor has her on a bayer aspirin regimen to help reduce the risk of another one. if you've had a heart attack be sure to talk to your doctor before you begin an aspirin regimen. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back, everybody. now have you ever noticed that when you google something there are millions of results? usually you only look at the first page or two, but i started to wonder about those last few pages where the internet becomes weirder -- [ laughter ] lonelier, stranger so allow me now to take you into the bowels of the internet with a segment we call "deep google." ♪ [ cheers and applause ] so, i thought since father's day coming up we could start our planning now by googling father's day. here's the first page of results for father's day about what you would expect, wikipedia page, big reminder of the date but look at the bottom at all those os in google. that means we can go deeper.

we'll be right back with more "late night." [ cheers and applause ] ♪ new lipton sparkling iced tea. tiny bubbles. for a taste that lifts you up. sorry... sorry... regerts? sorry, i was eating a milky way. ♪ we always use fresh milk, n art to making cream cheese. real cream, and no preservatives. that's why philadelphia cream cheese tastes so rich and creamy. only philadelphia. you have to feel healthy... on the outside ...at your core. trubiotics a probiotic from one a day naturally helps support both your digestive and immune health by combining... ... two types of good bacteria. trubiotics. be true to your health. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: last year my next guest debuted her number one smash "habits" right here on "late night." performing her latest hit "talking body," please welcome back to the show tove lo. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ bed, stay in bed the feeling of your skin locked in my head ♪ ♪ smoke, smoke me broke i don't care i'm down for what you want ♪ ♪ day drunk into the night wanna keep you here 'cause you dry my tears ♪ ♪ yeah summer loving and fights how it

new lipton♪sparkling iced tea. refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles. ] >> seth: welcome back, everyone. our first guest is a golden globe winning actor who is currently starring in the second season of the hit series "true detective." new episodes air sunday night on hbo. let's take a look. >> so why do you feel your visitation rights should be expanded, detective velcoro? >> well, how 'bout i raised him alone for two months when she took off. you know? it was me and him. she comes back, she's talking divorce. >> has either of you requested a paternity test? >> no. my son is my son. >> they're gonna ask that question. more rudely than i did. >> look, you're not getting -- there's me and him and i'm his dad. and i just need you to come up with something, all right? >> you might have the wrong idea. >> why do you like paying taxes? >> seth: please welcome colin farrell. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> seth: so wonderful to see you again. >> good to see you, seth. how are you? >> seth: i was saying backstage it's been about a decade since you hosted "snl." t

new lipton♪sparkling iced tea. refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles.lifts you up. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> seth: welcome back to "late night", everybody. our first guest tonight is an emmy award winning comedian and one of the most successful stand-ups of all time. you know him from a show that ran for nine years on this network called "seinfeld." [ cheers and applause ] the entire run of his show will be available to stream on hulu starting june 24th. he is also the creator and host of the very popular talk show "comedians in cars getting coffee." new episodes are available wednesday nights on crackle. let's take a look. >> my god he's a legend. the legend. the legend is here. that's how we do it. >> yeah. >> we do it good, now. oh, man. i'm ready to go, man. this is going to be great. >> i got you something special. ♪ >> oh! jerry, i'm fitting to cry. jerry, i'm fitting to cry. i'm fitting to cry, man. oh, oh, oh. oh, [ bleep ]. oh, [ bleep ]. okay. i'm cursing on your show. i'm in a 57 chevy grand lex rock top. ♪ nobody else do it like this. >>

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new lipton♪sparkling iced tea. refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles.e ] >> seth: welcome back to the show, everybody. our first guest is a talented actor, who has starred in films like "21 jump street" "foxcatcher" and "the vow." beginning july 1st you can see him in the highly-anticipated summer movie "magic mike xxl." let's take a look. >> look, i love you guys. this trip has been ridiculous, and amazing. so please, do not make me give the whole, "it's not about how we go out there and do it, it's about getting to go out there and do it together," speech, that i just gave you. >> what are you? you're not a fireman. >> i'm a -- male entertainer. >> oh yeah, what are we? >> entertainment. >> come on, get it in. >> hey, hey, hey. hold that up. hold that up. look, it is not bro time, it's show time. you guys ready? >> yeah, we're ready. >> all right. come on let's do this. >> ready? 1, 2, 3 -- >> male entertainers! [ laughter ] >> seth: please welcome, channing tatum! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> seth: so good to see you, my friend. >> good to see you as

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new lipton♪sparkling iced tea. refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles. hundred forty-four questions per day. bryce canyon is 29 minutes from your location. ♪ it's got the spring and bounce of a traditional mattress. you sink into it, but you can still move around. now that i have a tempur-flex, i can finally get a good night's sleep. (vo) change your sleep. change your life. change to tempur-pedic. ...maybe too much.ows... go ahead, call me a hoarder... i've got these little enablers, ziploc spacebags. see? way more space. [whispered] for more pillows... sj johnson only t-mobile sets your music free. don't let data charges stop the beat. at t-mobile stream all the music you want from the leading music services. pull the plug on your old carrier. switch to t-mobile and set your music free. ♪ ♪ chase freedom. the card is for the essentials. the cash back is for the fun. chase. so you can. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: tonight's musical guest is a reigning cma new artist of the year, whose scored three consecutive number one singles off of his debut al

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