you look like the offspring of if lou dobbs and jim cramer [bleeped] a muppet.ne wanted you to be president. we just wanted to watch you run. but if you won't listen to me, perhaps you'll listen to this little boy i found breathing steam in front of the diner each morning where i breakfast. "please, sir, please, can we have some more." i'm sorry, little boy, it's over. >> it can't be over, jon, because i purchased some things already with the trump joke bonus money that you promised me. >> >> jon: john, i told you not to get anything. >> i just made some real estate purchases, jon, relax. i used after last dollar of the crotch monster 5,000, my new jet ski, jon. >> jon: who is that girl on the back of your jet ski? >> i don't know. she came with the jet ski. the point, is i'm broke, jon. i even had to sell the fingers on my gloves. >> jon: pull yourself together, oliver. >> i'm sorry. >> jon: god dammit, trump, look what you're doing. run, for god's sake, run. america needs you. >> run, please, please. >> jon: john oliver, everybody. [ man ] ♪ trouble ♪ trouble,