melanie watts has confused queen elizabeth i and queen elizabeth ii.ust have typed the wrong queen number into google. your first day at school okay, then? yeah. hmm. the virgin queen has got four children now. hmm. oh. one of them's a helicopter pilot. dad! dad! mm-hmm? would bullets kill a fairy? yep, you could kill a fairy with bullets. would a machine gun kill a fairy? yeah, you kill pretty well everything with a machine gun. would a bazooka kill a fairy? yeah, a big bazooka. that would get 'em. dad: wha--? sorry. ben! just pick it up and put it on the shelf. you're lucky your mum didn't see that. ben: what about an atom bomb? dad: atom bomb would kill everything, pretty well-- fairies, elves... ben: can i watch little britain? dad: no. prison break? the sopranos? no. where is the dinosaur book? it's here, but you can't have it. why? because it's one of my days. i wrote it all down at the back. there are your days, and today's not any of your days. tv: the wildebeest seem little concerned... what's this? attenborough. that wildebeest is such an idi