bill hader, former governor of new york, eliot spitzer, the music of passenger, and trevor moore and mikeyy dare! and now, jay leno! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you! welcome -- [ cheers and applause ] thank you! welcome to the "tonight show." nice to have you here on a a friday night. hey. well, there's a big legal decision today, folks. a federal judge has ordered the government to stop genital searchesgu

. >> ford offe something called mikey. it allows you to restrict the mileage. you can seek only drive around downtown, i will limit your speed limit to 45. you can s 65, liver agreemt you have, e best part of this is if you take off the atbelt you lose the radio. music is so important to this generation, to take thaty. gerri: what is this? >> to have speed limitsallows you to monitoria e-mail, text messaging, this is great, this is really important, you can drive my infinity, here are the restrictions i am imposing. gerri: why don't we use onstar? >> a gm vehicle only, available on the new vehicles coming out. actually we ha an program, hover ey added a family link allowing family members to see where the her ones are. it can be really great also for wahing elderly drivers this will allow you to help them. gerri: that is a great idea. or when they drive afr dark. that is a good thing. tell mabout this one >> there are a bunch of different things. so many different ones. making sound systems. they are linking into the onboard diagnoics, underneath the --dash. yo

postal officials like mikey barnett tried to do that tried to close money losers like these. >> why weren'tpolitical pressure. >> close post offices no way. save billions by adjusting benefit payments? not a chance. >> these politicians aren't dumb. what are they thinking? >>> oo they can't be so shortsighted. they are supposed to be responsible. >> if the post office can charge anything it wanted it would operate -- >> why do they say they can't run it like a business? >> okay. >> they have to beg you for permission kiss your ring every time they want to do something. >> the post office provide something that is extremely valuable and has to be maintained that is universal service. that costs something. >> universal service means every american must get mail service. whether you live in the suburbs or deep in the heart of alaska. they even hall mail by yule to remote town at the bottom of the grand canyon. as senator frank ensays... >> it's in the conts tug-- constitution. >> it isn't. it has the power to establish post offices. it doesn't have to and it doesn't have to deliver mail to all

i'm mikey's friend, and i cannot wait to see him with a perm. i'm definitely excited to touch it. with it. >> i hope that after the show today all of my friends go out and get perms. >> whatever the perm looks like, i think it's gonna be a little bit better than the 90s grunge rock hair he's got right now. >> i imagine that new yorkers have seen weirder things on the subway, but i'm probably gonna get a few stares. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah, there we go. very good. i can't wait to see what michael is going to look like. now michael has been sequestered since he got permed, so he hasn't seen himself yet. and his friend hasn't seen him either. this entire process has been cloaked in secrecy. we have his buddy right here. say hello, wes. how are you? ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> how you doing? >> jimmy: how's it going, wes? >> it's doing good. >> jimmy: yeah, good. now, you said that you want -- you want to have a tight chia-pet. >> i was really hoping for something that's nice and tight, bouncy, you know? >> jimmy: you said you wanna bounce with it. >> just kind of boun

. >> ready, mikey?>> in the ongoing battle against drugs and contraband, pelican bay security squad has the authority to conduct cell searches at their discretion anywhere within the prison. >> all the way back? >> all the way back. >> the first guy, come on out. >> come back. >> like a s.w.a.t. team on the streets, the element of surprise puts them at an advantage. inmates are adept at concealing contraband in their cells as well as on their person. >> actually put it up their rectum. that's the best place to do it. unless we catch them in here quick enough where they can't get it up. behind this hollow, they'll put a razor blade on the spring, hang it way down here. might not see one little bitty tip of the string up here, just barely see it, but that's where they keep their stuff. >> nothing anymore makes me raise my eyebrows. it's been too long. seen too much. >> where did you find that? >> in a male inmate's cell. there's no such thing as crazy in prison. you know, i don't know, maybe you got to be

. >> i'm like mikey on the life cereal box.you got a little thing -- >> oreo -- >>> sam, while we get that sorted out, will you give us the weather? >> on monday, we have an exclusive interview we want to talk to you about. we're going to hear from one of the stars of "breaking amish," about her faith and what it was like to pose on the cover of "maxim." it's this sunday on tlc. and on monday -- that was a big deal in "breaking amish" to do a "maxim" cover. >>> now, let's get to the boards. we'll show you what's going on. on the weather board, a little bit of monsoon rain coming. we need to drop the temperatures down to get moisture in. we haven't gotten into arizona yet or nevada. but we're pulling it up through new mexico, some parts of east texas, western texas, as well. all the way up into colorado, grand junction, getting showers, as well. headed to the beach, ladies and gentlemen? are you? let's go to the beach. cape cod, 65 degrees. virginia beach, 72. tybee island, 80 degrees. miami beach, 85. on the west coast -- that'

mikeis a picture of lindsay and liz janey who has declared she will run. there is a video of ms. cheney she made her announcement. [video clip] >> the last years have been devastating. our national debt is nearing $17 jillian with no end in sight. it poses an inexcusable burden on our children and grandchildren. we have watched as our taxpayer dollars are wasted on investments that go bankrupt, so-called stimulus projects that never get off the ground, and federal government programs that do not. create not washington seems convinced that more government borrowing and spending are the solutions to every problem. they are dedicated to taking more money out of our pockets and massively expanding the government's role in our lives. host: that was the video release yesterday. relations foreign committee will consider samantha power, a former adviser to president obama, --, to become the u.s. representative to the united nations. the house financial-services committee at 10:00 will have ben bernanke, the federal reserve chairman, taking questions of -- and talking about the semiannual

. >> let's send mikey. cats sent scrambling everywhere. >> a lot of cats in that house. very nice. get over to meteorologist ind ra peterson. hopefully you're not bringing us down with bad news. >> i have a video of my dog doing that of a statue on the side of the street. first, monsoonal thunderstorms, typical for this time of year, but right around the cold front in the midwest, threat for severe weather. talking about kansas stretching all the way over through kentucky. otherwise, the rest of us are dealing with a lot of moisture coming in out of the gulf, a nice pattern change from last week. threat of thunderstorms are out there, about one to two inches of rain from the northeast down to the southeast, but the big difference is the cooler temperatures. last week we were talking about heat indexes feeling like 105. 70s sound by tomorrow? >> very nice. >> 20 degrees cooler than last week. >> 70s and dry, even better. >> you can thank me later. >> breakfast is on me. >> you heard it here. >>> coming up on "new day," this is something you're going to want to see, tearful testimony

mikey, you need a guy who needs heroin. >> did you miss the part where i can't actually find him?. >> you want him to reach out? he gets his stuff from the cozy cartel. he's not going to want them to know he's looking for a new supplier. >> that's why he's going to use a middle man. me. >> that was the scene from the new usa series "graceland." joining us now, two of the show's stars, aaron tveit and daniel sunjata. narcotics agents, very dark. >> a little dark, undercover agents from the fbi, dea and customs living in a safe house together in southern california. there was a real house from 1991 to 2000 in manhattan beach that also housed these agencies from, you know, agents from different agencies. that's basically where it then veers off into fiction. the kind of idea of this house was the true story part. >> i'm always curious when you go in undercover and you get in these situation, what happens to all the other externals in your life? when it comes to hollywood, you don't get a sense of -- it's kind of intense and amazing to be so immersed in something but it's almost unrea

chairman mccaul and mikey member thompson i think you have known me for the past several years to bevery committed to this problem. i would urge this committee to keep the pressure on the administration but to also provide the service we must get american people to convince them that the members of the federal government state and local officials are not spying for the sake of spying in u.s. the committee are in fact holding the executive ranch's feet to the fire to ensure their civil liberties and privacy are being protected. i think ms. lee ms. jackson-lee for making the statement. much of this cannot be spoken about here but as much as we'd can we must because without the trust of the american people the fbi, the cia cia and the department home and secure in the police department across this country will be looked at as the enemy and we cannot allow that to happen because once that happens our efforts to actually stop these terrorist acts will be seriously be seriously undermined. steve thank you director leiter. the chair recognizes professor hoffman for five minutes to speech or