you have been eaten by a giant angler fish onstage, crushed by a falling chandelier during a 2009 mtv show. do you think about dying? >> yes, i do. >> larry: at age 24? >> it's something i -- well, i dream about it a lot. i don't know. i suppose i could lie to you and not tell you the truth, but the truth is i do think about it. the angler fish in the show was actually my childhood monster. my big fear was of the angler fish. so it was kind of comical to use it in the show that i battle my childhood fear every night before the finale. but -- i don't know. i actually am good friends with deepak chopra who i speak a lot about to about my dreams. and he seems to think it's nothing to really worry about. he tells me i'm very creative and i should learn to embrace my insanity and not worry so much because i always call him and saying deepak, i had this most horrible, morbid dream. what does it all mean? he says you're just very creative. put it onstage. >> deepak is on this program a lot. he never worries about anything. he doesn't. >> he is a wonderful -- he is a wonderful person. i wish