stability to keep us nurtured to keep -- like, even like a checkbook balanced to keep us navigating the immigration system back and forth, checking in the mail, filling out forms and realizing this was wrong or this after knew won't work and we need to find a new one 0, or realizing today we have to drive to the embassy again to get these papers. just always, always there, always carrying it. and i always -- i noticed it in some ways and then obviously didn't -- as you get older you notice it in very different ways ump think the important thing to me, just it became important for me to just see her and see the experience ofs like here, and not let it get over shadowed by these -- the more obvious accomplishments of, like -- yes, my father also worked and he started over from scratch, and he had to build his new career after learning the language and taking tests and getting resetter identified as a physician and everything, and i value that and i think it was time to reclaim the value that my mother brought as well, and especially as far toes -- as far as the agency of the characters a lot of the women go