he was staying at the plaza mattel. my meeting was like at 2:00 p.m. i do not want to be late. i was really nervous. i got there like at 7:00 a.m. in the morning. i see a pay phone, 1975, no cell phone. i went to the pay phone and call billy crystal. he had been talking to lorne about the possibility of being on this new show. i said, do you have any hints you can give me so i can have a leg up in this meeting? he said, well, he used to write for woody allen. he used to produce monty python specials. oh, and he hates mimes. lorne hates mimes.

he was staying at the plaza mattel. my meeting was like at 2:00 p.m. i do not want to be late. i was really nervous. i got there like at 7:00 a.m. in the morning. i see a pay phone, 1975, no cell phone. i went to the pay phone and call billy crystal. he had been talking to lorne about the possibility of being on this new show. i said, do you have any hints you can give me so i can have a leg up in this meeting? he said, well, he used to write for woody allen. he used to produce monty python specials. oh, and he hates mimes. lorne hates mimes. the bulls up a chair and give him this poem with 1100 jokes in it. he opens it. he reads the first joke. egos, u -- he goes, uh-huh, good. then he closes the book. i wrote 1100 jobs over two days, and he reads one joke. i wrote a jokes and the post office was about to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the united states. 10 cents, but if you want to lick it, it is a quarter. [laughter] he said, good. good. he said, tell me, how much money do you need to live on? i said, well, i am making $2.75 an hour at the deli. match it. [laugh