bacon, pancetta, proscuitto, hamhocks, canned ham, john hamm. (laughter) oh-- he looks salty. (laughter) nation, they say that this bacon shortage is caused by global warming and crop failure. but i believe this bacon shortage is a conspiracy. a ba-con-spiracy. (laughter) just think about it, okay? who's not supposed to eat bacon? well, jews, first. but most of the jews i know do anyway. (laughter) once again, aloha. (laughter) no, i'm talking about the really observant jews. muslims. (laughter) they won't even touch bacon! which means this bacon shortage is nothing less than creeping sharia law! and you know who i blame? barack obama. (laughter) oh, i have been warning you for years about his kowtowing to islamic extremists. well, now the chicken shawarma has come home to roost-- in a catastro-pita. during the past arab spring obama let radical imams lead an uprising against our radical friends in the middle east. >> you go back to the beginning of the arab spring and this administration did everything in its power to dislodge two key u.s. allies-- hosni mubarak and moammar q